Disclaimer: Buffy the Vampire Slayer and the characters of Willow and Tara are sole property of Joss Whedon (et. al.), Mutant Enemy, UPN, etc. I gain no profit over this piece of fan fiction so I don’t own the lawsuit.
Rating: PG
Feedback: Always helps.
Summary: Picks up after “Seeing Red” but unlike the show and my previous fan fictions, Tara managed to survive.
Author’s Note: I have been writing about Tara’s death for quite sometime now, it is my way of remembering her and her Willow but I guess I, too, need a break from all the musings brought about by her parting. Now I choose to remember not the way Tara died, but the way she lived.
Glimmer of Hope
by
tiffany a.k.a. slayer747
It was way in the middle of the night, hours before the dawn arises. Yet Tara was all too awake. Mesmerized by her lover sleeping before her. Willow’s slow, steady breaths directly opposed that of when the two of them were making love. During those times, everything seems to happen so fast. It is like being in a race, not against each other, but against time. There’s so much to be done given only a little while. But this time, it’s all different. Willow is as if she’s got all the time in the world, She’s sleeping, and if Tara didn’t know better, Willow seems almost peaceful, almost calm. And even if it is just a pretense, Tara would miss none of that.
Willow’s eyes fluttered as she tried to open them. It took her a while before she finally was able to focus them into another set of eyes staring at her… Tara’s.
“Hey, you…” Tara said softly, her head supported by her hand which was propped up by her elbow.
“Baby, “ Willow said before taking a quick glance at the clock hung on the wall, “It’s… almost…three in the morning. Why are you up so… early?” her voice was heavy with the sound of sleep.
“No reason, I just you know… woke up…” Tara answered with her eyes never leaving Willow’s.
“Bad dream?”
“Sort of.”
“It’s going to be okay you know,.. whatever it is that has been bothering you. It’s…it’s all going to be fine.” Willow tried to reassure Tara, even forcing a smile to convince her lover.
Tara just let out a sigh. And Willow understood. Their relationship is the kind that needed no words, understanding each other and their feelings were as simple as breathing. So she continued, now lifting a finger to touch a round scar placed at the left of Tara’s chest, “It won’t happen again. I won’t let it.”
“You don’t know that.” Tara’s eyes dropped , now focusing on Willow’s fingers… then at her chest… at her scar.
“I do. Even if only to make you stop worrying.”
“I’m just scared.” It was an honest response. Tara was indeed scared, frightened.
“Well I guess it’s natural… for people… to be scared of death.”
“You see, Willow, I’m not scared of dying. I’m scared of being without you.” Tara’s hand now caught Willow’s, whose eyes rolled down a tear.
“Me too. God, Tara… the moment I saw that wound on your chest… I swear… I felt like dying myself. And I know that I won’t be able to survive without you.”
“It must have been the reason why I held on…” Tara’s voice was unsure and the words came out merely as a whisper. If not for the silence the night offered, it would have been inaudible for the redhead.
“And that only proves that you are strong, Tara. That is why I know that’s it’s going to be fine. Our love keeps us together. We are meant to be together. I need you to believe that…” Willow seemed like she was begging. Tara did need to believe. Because if she didn’t there will be no reason for Willow to have faith either, “I need you to believe with me.”
“Oh, Willow…” Tara’s face was wet with tears as she snuggled into her girlfriend under the covers, “You’re doing it again… making me feel good when I’m at my worst…”
“Simply because I love you. And it comes naturally… and I don’t think you are at your worst right now… you’re just being honest. Being true to your own words.”
“My own words?” Tara lifted her head and looked at Willow, puzzled by the latter’s statement.
“Remember when you told me that when it doesn’t all have to be ‘good’ and ‘fine’ and that this is the room where…”
“You don’t have to be brave…” Tara cut her short.
“Yes. You don’t have to be brave, but I repeat, I need you to believe. I need you to have faith.”
Again, silence filled the room, but this one was brought about by comfort and genuine peace. Willow held Tara tightly… more tightly than she ever did. Then Tara once again spoke, her voice more certain than it did a few minutes ago.
“When I got shot, when I almost died, I lost it… my faith. But you brought it back… just now.”
And just as now, completely heartfelt smiles formed in Willow and Tara’s lips. They wiped each other’s tears away… not only those that were in their cheeks but as well as the ones that were in their hearts. The past few weeks have been difficult, but it doesn’t matter now. It doesn’t matter because they have found each other again… just like before… just like they always will.
Fin
feedback at roguelslayer747@yahoo.com
"Sometimes things happen between people that you don't really expect. And sometimes the things that are important are the ones that seem the weirdest or the most wrong, and those are the ones that change your life." - Jessie "Once and Again"
at: 9/8/04 9:52 pm