Poetry in Dog Years

[infinitelight]

Yeah, 'lost for a bit' is a good way to describe what's been going on with me . Actually, maybe 'lost for more than a bit' is more accurate...



I loooove book recommendations with a passion that is not entirely healthy, so I am going to find me some Irvine Welsh next time I'm a-shopping.



Belated feedback on poem from 11/1: Wow. Just wow. So angsty and dark and intense; my favorite lines are "you know i kept enough back that/i am still/surviving alone".



*piles oranges outside the temple of the dog*

[bulldog tidnab]

I'm still awake.

Ok, I must respond to one thing real quick-like here.

To the individual who sent me an email with feedback of the negative variety (and I dont mean in a constructive way), and I am quite sure if you are reading this and you concentrate real hard, you know who you are. If you take issue with what I post in this thread or, say, have quite a bit of unresolved anger regarding said posts, I have 2 bits of advice for you:

1. Don't read it. No skin off my back and it keeps us both from wasting our time.

2. Grow up, get a spine and let go of whatever mommy issues you are harboring. It's old, it's tired and frankly, I don't give a shit.

My apologies to all of you that this is not directed toward. In the future, my email address will no longer be listed here on the board. If you would like to get in touch with me via email, and I am all about talking with folks, let me know here and I will e-mail YOU. Hate to do it that way, but it looks like the most viable option at the present time. More apologies for being a bit bitchy on that, but I did feel it necessary under the circumstances. Sorry, I don't like it when people pet my fur backwards, makes me all ruffled and irritable. *steps down off of soapbox*

Moving on....



Steph - So i got all curious about Temple of the Dog and looked them up. Turns out they had a song I know. "Hunger Strike" I guess it's called. Fitting name, as I listened to it and promptly gave up any idea of consuming food again. Lovely. As for the establishment of a permanent shrine, I'm thinking here will do for now, but perhaps in the near future, I can see about funding from the government so that i can branch out. East coast, West coast, Wyoming, the works.

Next poem... hmmm... well... soon... very soon...



infinitelight - Wow, don't see you in a good while and boom, there you are twice in an incredibly short timespan. Be still my heart. Try not to get lost again. You are missed.

Oh goody! Someone else who loves book recs. yay! ok, whe it comes to Irvine Welsh (and I've read 'em all) go for: Trainspotting, Ecstasy, The Acid House and possibly Filth. Porno was entirely too bizarre, even for me(and that says a LOT) and The Marabou Stork Nightmares I threw into a wall 70-some pages into it. Now then, new books I'm reading that you should ask yourself how you've ever lived without?

Constantine's Sword by James Carroll. It's a history of the Catholic church andthe Jews. It's a current re-read, but I learn something new everytime I read it.

AND

Giovanni's Gift By Bradford Morrow (same guy who wrote Trinity Fields) It's an interesting take on the myth/idea of Pandora's box. Intense, dark and subtley beautiful. I'm hooked.

As for your feedback on the poem from 11/1: Angst is playing a heavy role in my life right now and it pops up more and more in my writing. Here's hoping I don't scare anyone off. And you know, oranges are my favorite fruit, but that is also book related and perhaps better suited for another day. Good to know that I am still "touching" you and that you are continuing to "respond"



New words to come... or at least to breath hard...



*woof*

Beyond this place of wrath and tears/Looms but the horror of the shade/And yet the menace of the years/Finds, and shall find me, unafraid.

Edited by: bulldog tidnab at: 11/22/02 1:45:44 am

[mollyig]

Oh I missed this one.



we did it together

found

order in chaos



I like that even though there is this loss, and it ends with her wishing, there's still a positive feel to it, by how resolved she is -



i can not lose that

i will not

i cling to the thought of you

Adding up the total of a love that's true, multiply life by the power of two
Indigo Girls

[bulldog tidnab]

Morning kids. It is dark and cold here. Ick. So, i thought I'd have some posting fun to take my mind off fo my frozen toes.

mollyig - thank you. you always give such well-thought out feedback. i just love that about you.



and something new. I am so stressed right now. Let's see if you can tell. Heh.



i woke up and wondered

just who made the bed

i was lying in i know it wasn't me

i never lifted a finger

i woke up and tried

hard as no effort could

to find the reason

find the energy to crawl out of

the bed i didn't make

and i

forced myself

to return to

every night

the way i was so brave in the theories

i never even tested

and who made the bed

the evil powers

the higher ups

the know-better-thans

i was given no tools

i could not build or rebuild

only smooth the sheets and cover up

i had no taste for that

i left it all undone

and when i woke up

i did it every day

the arguing and circle running

mind marathons

in search of something

that didn't get a name

or even a bed

in which to rest

that ran in circles too

and not the ones i ran in

and i got no rest in that bed

made for me by someone else

whose shape did not match mine

whose form was no near fit

i tore it down

bare hands and yells

forced breath and new found

brave strong hands

found a steady place of rest

abandoned their conventions

sleep in any place i stop

only my body only my heart

only my spirit only my hands

set free by a mind that now understands

i need nothing of what they built for me

my body is all i need to breathe

my mind is all i need to survive

my heart is all i need to appease

so i can

get some fucking rest





I need coffee. I'm gonna fall asleep on the keyboard. *scurries of to find the grinder*



*woof*

It matters not how straight the gate/ How charged with punishments the scroll/ I am the master of my fate/ I am the captain of my soul.

[Tara22]

*eyes wide*



WOAH.... Bulldog...that was just...woah...



amazing!

Quote:

---

i woke up and wondered

just who made the bed

---

I loved it!!! and also the

Quote:

---

my body is all i need to breathe

my mind is all i need to survive

my heart is all i need to appease

---

wowzers! I hope things are ok for you!

***

"Oh, sorry. Uhh, I forgot that that doesn't seem normal, to the rest of society. It's just, we, well, we both really like cows. Really like them. To the extent of wanting to buy one, when we're older." - The Crying Game (by Vix84)

[funkyasian]

very very stress bulldog i see...*hugs*



as usual, your words are amazing...the meanings behind each word...very thought-worthy...okay...sorry no deep insight this morning, i'm still zonked...but just wanted to pay my compliments...



no more being stressed??



steph

Nothing can cure the soul but the senses, just as nothing can cure the senses but the soul. ~ Oscar Wilde

[ExtraFlameyWT]

wow...wow...umm, wow again.

Quote:

---

i need nothing of what they built for me

---

that line particularly stuck with me for some reason...hmm.



i think i'm going back to the wow's though...



wow



great poem, andi



love,

Aimster

Watch out for ankle-biters.

[infinitelight]

More touching, more response...and the words come. Or at least, they have a good time and get all sweaty.



I love this: "i woke up and tried/hard as no effort could". I really like the angsty/angry feeling of this one, particularly the impact of the last line. It's a wake-up poem (to the reader) all right. Also like the imagery of the bed and the control/lack of control theme.



Sorry to hear you've been the recipient of oh-so-delightful 'You Just Plain Suck' feedback. I know your pain; some people are just all full up with the hate. And sad to see you're all angst-filled of late. I hope things get better.



Book recs, whee! And d'oh! I saw 'Trainspotting' when second-hand bookshopping on the weekend, but didn't buy it because I only had the rec for 'The Acid House'. James Carroll's 'An American Requiem' has been recced to me in the past (from a Jonathan Carroll email list--someone misread the name and bought the book by mistake ). Keep meaning to check it out. 'Giovanni's Gift' is out of print, bah! I'll have to try the library. Return recs: the aforementioned *Jonathan* Carroll is my rec to the world. He's often recced alongside Neil Gaiman, but he kicks Gaiman's ass. I'm currently reading the Kitten-favorite 'Fingersmith' by Sarah Waters--only just started though.

'Better to light a candle than curse the damn darkness.'

[pacou]

Wow Bulldog,



very nice and very powerful poem



I really liked it, its cool how youre separating the lines



Thanks, always looking for new ones



-Viv-

[TheWhiz]

Hey there!

I've finally made it to your thread to catch up on all your poems!

Woah! I have been impressed with what I have missed, I love your style of writing, so unique. You have a great way with words and use wonderful imagery

Keep up the fantastic work will try to keep up from now on!

[bulldog tidnab]

It seemed like the best subject line to use at the time, seeing as to how a cat took that particular opportunity to climb my back. Little bastard....

Now then, what was I doing? Oh yes, replies...



Tara22 - Heh. Thanks. Now when you say eyes wide, do you mean as saucers or are we talkin' dinner plates? I am so glad you liked this. Things are vaguely okay for me right now. Will be sure as to my level of okayness after the beginning of the coming week.



Steph - Thank you oh-sleepy-one. Perhaps more sleep for you would be a good thing? Just a thought I'm working on the stress level. Just gotta get through Monday. Bwa ha ha!



Aimster - Hmm... a lot of wows from you this time. I'm gonna take that as a good thing. The line you mentioned is actually my current frame of mind. I need nothing of what others create. I know where I stand and it is on my own two feet. Thank you dear.



infinitelight - Oh! The words had a good time and got all sweaty? Were they breathing hard at least? *sighs* I miss all the fun.

Yes, this was definetly a wake-up poem. Both for the reader and in a way for myself. The lack of control thing and the bed thing actually built off of each other. I was thinking about safety and control and the one place where most people feel the most safe and in control is in their own bed. However, it is also the place where the mind tends to wander the most and can occasionally trap itself. Blessing and a curse and all that.

Hmmm... Jonathan Carroll you say? Will have to check him out. I rather enjoy Gaiman, but if you say this guy blows him away then I will have to read him. Any titles in particular i should start with? You'll have to let me know how Fingersmith is. I was going to pick it up the other day, but I put it back and got How the Scots Invented the Modern World instead. Cause I'm, you know, weird. As for Giovanni's Gift, I don't know that you'll be able to find it in libraries anymore either. At least, I know it isn't around here. Look for it and let me know if you can't find it. Perhaps we can work something out.



pacou - Hey there. Thank you muchly. The seperation of lines in this one gave me a raging headache. I'm glad it worked well. As for new ones, my plan is to post something before Monday. We'll see how it goes.



TheWhiz - Howdy. long time no see. Hmmm... Unique huh? *thinks* Why thank you! It's good to be unique. You like my imagery? Wow, see that's the thing I like the least about my writing. Always feels like it's forced or something. Again, thank you.



Well, that was rather long-winded of me. Sorry about that. Something new up before Monday... I think. But I can't be held accountable if I end up jailed for strangling this damn cat. Shoulda got him declawed....



*woof*

It matters not how straight the gate/ How charged with punishments the scroll/ I am the master of my fate/ I am the captain of my soul.

[Mighty Teeny Wiccan]

There, there, Dawg. I shouldn't concern myself with what other creatures think, especially raggedy alley cats. I mean really, how can you give brain time to something that coughs up furballs and eats MICE? Back to it's trash can hang-out with it! Begone, moth eaten kitty! And we all know what happens to those who bother MY familiars, don't we? *wink, smirk, giggle* There'll be a special receipe bubbling in my cauldron for YOU.

Loving my Dawg,

T Bone

[ninjitsugrrl]

Sorry it has taken me a while to respond to the latest poem. It is wonderful! I really like the tension that builds throughout. I especially like this section, "my body is all i need to breathe/ my mind is all i need to survive/ my heart is all i need to appease". The parallel lines work very well.

"I know the answer! The answer lies within the heart of all mankind! The answer is twelve? I think I'm in the wrong building." - Lucy in "Peanuts" by Charles Schultz




My Homepage

[Tara22]

I really loved that bulldog!!!

Quote:

---

i ran out of tears

this afternoon

amazing really

---

I LOVED those lines!



and I loved how it was in conversation or speaking format!



great!!!!

***

"Oh, sorry. Uhh, I forgot that that doesn't seem normal, to the rest of society. It's just, we, well, we both really like cows. Really like them. To the extent of wanting to buy one, when we're older." - The Crying Game (by Vix84)

[barnabasvamp]

Quote:

---

if i can only remember

just breathe

take one step

recover my footing

fall if i must

but

always

get

up

---

Well done Andi ...Definite signs of recovery are sneaking into your work..We should Never let anything keep us down!

Jean

"In front of total strangers won't you kiss me, Flowers for no reason but you miss me - OOH, I wanna be in love"

Melissa Etheridge-Skin

[ninjitsugrrl]

Wonderful! I love the way the poem progresses. At the start the speaker seems resigned to her situation but by the end you can see that she has gained a feeling of hope and determination. Well done.

"I know the answer! The answer lies within the heart of all mankind! The answer is twelve? I think I'm in the wrong building." - Lucy in "Peanuts" by Charles Schultz




My Homepage

[infinitelight]

The fun never stops around here, I tell ya. I liked the first few lines and: 'this is when i take/ what i know/ write a section of life/ get it right this time'. This poem has a real spark to it, you know? I want to get up and do something useful now.



Thanks for the comments on the imagery of the last poem. It's always interesting to hear the background. Yes, the words got all sweaty. Even words are having a better time than me these days.



I like Gaiman too (although I thought 'American Gods' was disappointing), but I do think he's overrated. Carroll is probably my favorite novelist. My particular favorite of his work is 'Outside the Dog Museum' (Carroll is obsessed with bulldogs which shows he is a man of taste), but I think most people prefer 'Bones of the Moon' which is excellent and probably the most accessible of his novels (they're all easy to read though). Given what I've read of your poetry, I think you might find his style and his use of imagery interesting. A couple of your poems have actually reminded me of his work.



Two-thirds of the way into 'Fingersmith' and loving it. No progress on 'The Acid House' or 'Giovanni's Gift'--I keep forgetting what day of the week it is (encroaching senility I think) so I haven't gotten to the library.



Forgot to ask you about the oranges thing last time--Jeanette Winterson reference?



Perhaps I should stop stealing your threadspace for OT stuff now . Maybe you'd care to email me sometime (address in my profile) if you want to chat about books.



I would like to conclude this lengthy post by saying 'thank you!' for the new poem, and I hope everything's going well .

'Better to light a candle than curse the damn darkness.'

[TheWhiz]

Great poem, love how it develops



'don't have to see through

a haze

to seek it out

it simply finds it's own way

through me'



I found these lines really effective.

Keep up the great work!

[pacou]

Wow



Awesome poem *thud*



So desperating and full of hope at the same time, I think

Quote:

---

if i can only remember

just breathe

take one step

recover my footing

fall if i must

but

always

get

up

---

That was soo good!



Very good poem, thanks so much, Bulldog!



-Viv-

[bulldog tidnab]

Especially since I'm supposed to be napping, but I'll get back to it later. First, replies to your lovely, lovely feedback:



Tara22 - Ah, yes, my loyal feedback provider. Thank you. I'm glad you liked this, especially the format that was used. Don't know if I'll use it again, but who knows?



Jean - Thanks darlin'. Ah, yes, the sweet smell of recovery. things may actually get a bit lighter in this thread for a bit. The sun came back out today....



ninjitsugrrl - Glad you liked the progression in this. I'm pleased that you read the hope in there... was worried people might miss it and focus on the beginning resignation. Thank you



infinitelight - Well, I'm sure that at some point the fun will stop, but it can feel free to continue for now. It's quite a ride. Words are even having a better time than you too huh? *sigh* Such is life I suppose.

So did you actually get up and do something useful or just think about it? I stopped at writing about it.

As always, you're welcome for the poem, though thanks is not necessary.

I will drop you an email to continue Ye Olde Booke discussion. (i'm such a nerd)

OH! and yes... it was a Jeanette Winterson reference, because while oranges are my favorite fruit, they are not the only fruit.



TheWhiz - Thank you muchly. Glad those lines worked for you. I liked them quite a lot too. Thanks for reading



Viv - You know my dear, you don't have to call me Bulldog. You can just call me Andi, everyone else does. Bulldog seems so.... formal? I'm glad you liked this one. I'll have more soon.



Ok, got something new... but it's not going up yet. I have taken it upon myself to fetch a beta due to spelling errors and typos at large, makes my life easier. That and the other day I says to myself, I says "Self, why can't a poet have a beta too?" So i got one. ( Hi Tina!)

So as soon as I send it to her and I get it back it shall be posted. Sound good? I thought so too.

Take it easy kids. I'm goin' back to bed.



*woof*

It matters not how straight the gate/ How charged with punishments the scroll/ I am the master of my fate/ I am the captain of my soul.

[funkyasian]

hey andi...i swear i read this poem when you first posted it...but for whatever reason i didn't write you a quick note to tell you how much i loved it...so i'm making up for it now...it's awesom, like all your other ones...love you!



steph

Nothing can cure the soul but the senses, just as nothing can cure the senses but the soul. ~ Oscar Wilde

[pacou]

lol sorry Andi that I called you bulldog



lol I didnt get your name really yet, but I have now



Hmm and now you'll never be bulldog again, youre only Andi now *muahahaha*



Hehe, wanted to tell you this and that Im looking forward to the next of your mostly confusing but oh-so-good poems



-Viv-

Dont dream it, be it

[barnabasvamp]

Andi;

So much feeling, so much love

Jean

"In front of total strangers won't you kiss me, Flowers for no reason but you miss me - OOH, I wanna be in love"

Melissa Etheridge-Skin

[Tara22]

oooh... yeah



I loved that one!!! (bet you knew I would say that )



It's just great! I loved the first lines of each stanza. Really great stuff!!!!



Thanks



oh... and the wide eyes... saucers for sure

***

"Oh, sorry. Uhh, I forgot that that doesn't seem normal, to the rest of society. It's just, we, well, we both really like cows. Really like them. To the extent of wanting to buy one, when we're older."- The Crying Game (by Vix84)

[funkyasian]

hey andi...can i just mention...i'm still stuck on "awwww"



that was so cute...and light...definitely made me smile. and btw...i can't write circles around you...i can only hope and pray i write as well as you do one day...(did i ply it on a little thick this time??!! )



~steph

Nothing can cure the soul but the senses, just as nothing can cure the senses but the soul. ~ Oscar Wilde

[ExtraFlameyWT]

i'm stuck on "aww" still, too! beautiful!!



love you, andi!



Aimster

Watch out for ankle-biters.

[pacou]

Beautiful!



Yeah, I definitey like it I bet this wil make a great song By the way, is that supposed to be a slow song or more the rocky version lol



Hmm, this is really on the loving side lol Although all of your poems have been so far



-Viv-

Dont dream it, be it

[bulldog tidnab]

Plato sucks. Seriously. Sorry, I'm writing a bitch of a paper right now. But I've decided to take a little break for a smoke and some replies to feedback.



Jean - Thank you thank you thank you. Without you I wouldn't have posted it. So again, thank you.



Tara22 - Ok the verdict is in, it's saucers. Good to know. I'm glad you liked this. I tried to allow the first lines to connect each other a bit. Don't know that it worked, but I am satisfied with the overall effect of the poem I think.



Steph and Aimee - Okay you two, are you both very nearly finished awwing? Because honestly I don't know how much more gushing this dawg can take... I'm barely staying afloat. I'm glad you guys liked it. love you guys



Viv - I'm glad you liked this. It actually did turn out as a pretty decent song. As for the speed and how it sounds, note the following:



Okay, the recording went really well. And I do have a copy of the song. If anyone would like to hear it, feel free to let me know here and I will email you. Aimee and Steph seem to like it if nothing else. So hey, go me!



Something new in the near future.



*woof*

"Usually when people are sad, they don't do anything. They just cry over their condition. But when they get angry, they bring about a change."

- Malcolm X

Edited by: bulldog tidnab at: 12/10/02 5:23:20 pm

[funkyasian]

DUH!!!



of course we like it...it's such a sweet song...remember? me, pacing in windows??!!



seriously...i dont' think i'll ever be over the whole aww thing...i'm a sucker for romantic gestures...



~steph

Nothing can cure the soul but the senses, just as nothing can cure the senses but the soul. ~ Oscar Wilde

[ExtraFlameyWT]

of course i'm not done awwing, andi!!!!



the song is SO BEAUTIFUL!!!



AWW



okay, if it bothers you...i'll keep my "aww"s to myself...but i must say once again how much i love it.



okay, i'm gonna go now...i need a shower...stupid basketball practice. i mean, seriously...WHO needs to run that much?!



love you andi!!!



Aimster

Edited by: DrG at: 12/13/02 2:46:53 pm