Saving Us Both AU First fic NC 17(complete 01/10/08)

[whatmakesyouhappy]

Woo and Hoo face to face meeting ! maybe then Willow can break Tara down and get her to let her help

[hondos]

jay/wt4evr

oh God you got my trouble-senses all on!!! son of a bitch he will pay right? right!
more soon pliz!

and keep them on.troubles a comin
Zampsa1975I

hope Willow & Co find a way to save Tara's child and then save Tara and put Donny out of his misery

You dont like donnie?Why not?sure he has issues but hey.hehehehkidding he will get his i promise.Its gonna be bad for a while nowbut the good stuff will come
MsKittyBI

hate him!! Kill him off lol. I really hope that Donny gets what's comming to him! Brutaly!!!

You frighten me no not really he will pay dearly i give my word on that,much angst coming first though.

Why is he paying the cop? It's a crooked cop hun?

one of many very bad people we are about to meet.This story is only just starting now.Its gonna be rough thats for sure so hang in with me.I promise good things will come.

SAVE HER WILLOW

I hope so too

whatmakesyouhappy

Woo and Hoo face to face meeting ! maybe then Willow can break Tara down and get her to let her help

I think you'll like the update.We got some hope coming in this one.Its really only the very begining here.This is a long way from over.I hope you stick around.

Thanks to you guy for the feedback.Its nice.
Rosemary



Saving Us Both

Raiting NC -17

Author Rosemary

Feedback Okay

This is my first story ever.I would be happy to get any tips or let me know how I can improve or just say Stop writing .Theres no hope for you.


Disclaimer:Not mine They're Joss Whedons










"Well this is creepy"Willow thought."Its bad enough during the day but at night?"
She sat in her car about 1/2 a mile from the first guard post as instructed by Buffy.
She had been thinking of ways that she could get Tara to come clean with her.She wasn't sure she would be able to get her to trust her but she had to try.
She had done a lot of thinking about her dream from the day before as well.It was ridicules to think that she could be falling in love with Tara.She had only meet her once,and outside of the spicy talk, it wasn't pleasent.
Wait,wait.wait did I just think that the spicy talk was pleasant cause, most of it eww. but some of it , defiantely doable.God ,she shook her head.Im such a prude.Anya's right.
Oh I'm in trouble now.First spicy talk good,now anya right?No,no,no, Anya's never right so only one bad there.
Willow heard a tap on the window and she about had a heart attack."God you scared me Buffy."
"Sorry , hey, come on. All after hours visitors have to go up in my car."Buffy said
Willow got out of her car and followed Buffy.Buffy turned and handed her something,"Here put this on."
Willow took the badge from Buffys hand and looked at it."Computer maintenance?"
"Yeah. thats the only way I could get you in this late., can you pull it off?"
"I don't know, I don't know much about computers"Willow added "and how did you get my picture?"
"From when you came to see Tara the first time."
"Well isn't there somebody in the servaience room all the time?"
Buffy smiled and said".Not on Sunday from 2 am to 8 am its a shift that we don't have covered by a tech.We just pull a guard from one of the other sections and they
cover it.Thats why it wont be hard to pull it off.They won't know that there isn't anything wrong in there or that we have no idea what were talking about."
"Well how do you know how to shut the cameras down in a particular area?"Willow asked
"I dont.I just know which cable to pull."Buffy said, "I think."
"Oh Buffy, I don't know.This sounds risky."Willow said"I mean even if we do get the cameras down how am I goanna get to Taras cell unnoticed?"
"You wont be going to Taras cell.Tara will be coming to you.See were going to say , or you rather, that there's a malfunction in SOL 126 and that you need to check the camera there.Thats stands for solitary row 126.There is no one in the row right now.At least not for another ,"Buffy stopped and looked at her watch,"eighteen minutes."
"What happens in eighteen minutes?"Willow asked
"Tara's about to attack Faith again on cell check"Buffy said."Shell need to be moved to solitary and the only open cells are on 126."
"Whoa,whoa, wait a minute Tara's going to attack Faith?"Willow asked ."Does Faith know?"
"Yeah,...but Tara doesn't"Buffy smiled
"Buffy, you have a criminal mind you know that.?"
"You have to here.Keeps you on top of things."
"Did you say again , about the attacking Faith? Did Tara attack Faith?"
"Yep,"Buffy smiled a little,"Kicked her ass too.Since then Faith spends every lunch hour in the gym."
"Well what if Tara decides to kick my ass?I've seen Faith and if she could kick her ass , well Im dead."Willow said
"Faith will be right outside.Shell check on you every few minutes".Buffy added"But I don't think Tara will hurt you Willow. I saw your interview tape.She likes you.You can tell."
"Alright"Willow said."Lets do this."
"Willow?"Buffy asked smiling"What did Tara say to you anyway?"
"Oh wouldn't you like to know"Willow laughed.



"Get the fuck offa me God Damn it"Faith yelled at the top of her lungs.
"Tara looked up startled.Jumped out of her cot and backed up to the far end cell.
Faith came up to her and said quietly, "Maclay , Im not here to hurt you , just play along and everything will be cool alright?"
"Fuckin Son of a Bitch"Tara screamed , "Now what does he want from me? Your working for him right?"Why wont you just leave me the fuck alone?"

"Put your hands up , turn around and face the wall NOW!" Faith screamed.
Tara did as she was told and Faith came over and cuffed her.
"Guard" Faith yelled
"The young female guard ran over to the cell and asked "Shit Faith , What the hell happened?"
"The bitch attacked me .Find me a opening in solitary will ya?I think 126 has open holes"Faith snapped
"Alright Faith Got it .The guard answered.
"You want me to take her down Faith?"She asked
"Hell no,I got this one.Its personal now."Faith said
"Yeah ,you're right Faith 126 is vacant"she answered.
Faith reached into her belt and took out her radio"Yeah can you open 621 for me.Got a transport to the hole"
"Got it "The voice on the other end answered.
There was a beep and the door slide open..
Faith walked down the hall with Tara standing in front off her .
"Look , Tara ,Im really sorry about this but trust me , its for your own good"Faith said
"Fuck you, "Tara spat out."You better watch your ass cause if you ever come near me and I'm not cuffed I'll fuckin kill you,"

"Yeah well whatever, I don't give a fuck about your threats.Maybe you should just try to give one of the fuckin people around this place that want to help you a chance."Faith answered back.

Tara chuckled , turned her head a little and said "This is help? You come into my cell in the middle of the night , accuse me of attacking you, cuff my ass and through me in solitary and I should see this as help? Well Jesus Christ, forgive me for not trusting you."

"Well I see your point here , but just give me a break and take my word on it that I aint trying to hurt you Okay?"Faith said.

"Your word? " You work for him and I'm supposed to take your word? Again I say FUCK YOU!!" Tara spit out.

"I don't work for any him Maclay so calm down."

Faith took up her radio and said,"Inmate 44624 MACLAY Booking in SOL 126 cell 16 Open gate 3 please"

"Got it"the voice on the other end said.



"You need to go down and check the doohickey on the camera thing? That's the best you could do? Doohickey?Camera thing?"Buffy said to Willow.

"What? She didn't notice Buffy.She was reading Mulder and Scully fanfiction on her laptop.I saw it."Willow answered.

"Ooh,I like Mulder and Scully."Buffy answered

"Yeah ! Me too"Willow answered.

"Alright Willow .You got four hours.See what you can do.Good luck and don't worry.Faith will be right outside.Oh and here. You'll need this.There's no lighting in there.It's pitch black till lights up at 7:15"
She handed willow a candle and a lighter. "I'd give you a flashlight , but she's kinnda' pissed so..."

Faith opened the cell door and let Willow in."Well Buffy was right it is dark"
"Tara , its me, Willow. I want to talk to you. I know something's and Im hoping you don't just kick my ass right now but, um , I really need to talk to you."
"Tara , are ya gonna answer or what?"
"So talk then"Tara answered
Willow could tell by Taras voice that she was crying.
And her heart was breaking.In her life she had never been moved by anything like she was now.
Even if she had wanted to she couldn't have stopped herself from going to the other woman and holding her.
She approached her slowly, asking"Tara, please"her own voice breaking now as the tears fell from her eyes,"Please just let me help you"
She took a step closer, and then another.
She was standing in front of her now and she slowly lowered herself to sit next to Tara on the cot."Tara," she said,the word coming out shaky from her voice ,it was so full of emotion."Please, please let me".
Then Tara was sobbing , her head falling to Willows shoulder and Willow pulled her head to her chest and began to rock her ,trying to sooth her with her words.
"Shh Tara, Im here now shh"she pet the hair on Taras head"just let it go.Let it all out"
Then Tara raised her head and Willow ran her thumbs under her eyes whipping away the tears.
Tara let out a whisper that Willow couldn't quite make out and pressed her forehead to Willows.
"Willow,"Tara whispered out and then it happened.Tara slowly moved her head forward and their lips meet.It was slow and chaste yet filled with passion.Willow knew now why she existed.Every minute of everyday had been leading up to this and only this.she was the answer to every question she had ever asked.She was Taras and Tara was hers and her life would never be the same again.
TBC

[MsKittyB]

DIBS!!!! lol I just wanted to say that.
So now I know there crooked cops. Tara's reaction told that. Poor Tara.

"I don't know, I don't know much about computers" Willow added

This made me laugh. Nice to see Tara finally open up to Willow. Even though if made me feel like crying. In a good way.
Wow this story is getting very interesting. Now if only we can kill Donny ahead of time lol j/k. Excellent update. I cant wait for the next chapeter.

[Zampsa1975]

Great update-y goodness... Yay finally... I really hope that Tara's child is saved soon and Tara finally can get out of prison and get Willow snugglies and smootchies all day long...

[jay/wt4evr]

that was so sweet...
piffle like Tara has ever been someone else's apart of Wllow!!
Go-Wil-low Go-get-your-girl!!!!
buuuut....going right now to the 'happly ever after' part..no?
though I wanna see Donnie's big ass kicked!!

[hondos]

MissKitty-Im delighted that you liked the update.Patients hun, Donnys time will come I promise.

Zampsa1975Many smootchies in the horizon for our girls.I promise.Glad you liked the update.


jay/wt4evrNever fear.Donny ass kicking will come.I hope you like the next update.Thank for reading .


Thanks to all for the feedback





Their kiss continued.
She knew it now.She felt it.It had now become a part of her.
The simple physical connection of two people that had given way to a spiritual connection so enormous that it could not be contained.

In this moment Willow had taken on every pain, humiliation , fear and anger that Tara had ever known. It was no longer Tara's, it was theirs. The suffering of this woman tore into her so powerfully that she thought she might die of it.

She knew that if she could take her suffering on to herself she would do it without hesitation.
If this woman who had had everything good in her life taken away from her could find just a moment of peace then it would be worth the cost.

The pain was now giving way to anger. Anger at person who would use the strongest of loves in nature , that of a mother and child , for purposes so vile that it seemed impossible.

As the kiss continue , so did the emotional cycle and she was now privy to the kindness and love that was remarkably still intact in one treated so cruelly ,the good in this woman so strong that it was capable of quelling the anger.

The reward for this love would be her death,and Willow would not stand for it.
She loved this woman. She loved her and it needed to be said.As she broke their kiss she paused to allow all that had happened to sink in.

"I'm sorry."Tara said."I shouldn't have done that"her head immediately slumped forward and she could not look up.

Willow shook her head and laughed in disbelief,"Your sorry?""My God Tara what do you have to be sorry for?"Willows voice was shaking with emotion.

Taras head remained down.Willow placed her fingers under her chin and lifted her face so she could look into her eyes.

"Tara , look at me."Willow said

"No , Willow , I don't want you to see me."Tara said

"Tara , Its a little late for that.Since I met you yesterday I haven't seen anything eles.Now Im not claiming to understand this, but I know one thing that's as sure as anything Ive ever known.Im falling in love with you.Im falling more in love with you every second Im in your presence.

I'm going to tell you something Tara.I'm going to tell you something and I don't want you to forget it.Not for a minute.I will not sit here and watch you die.I..."Willows words caught in her throat as she tried to hold back a sob that escaped her mouth,"I will stop this whether you help me or not"

"You can't stop this Willow , you can't."

"Yes Tara , I can.What would be even better is if we stopped this.Why wont you help me?""Why Tara?"

Tara didn't answer her.

"Tell me something Tara.Whos the little girl in the picture?"

"What, What , did you say?"Tara spat.

"Who is she?Tara tell me"

"What have you done?What the ...Oh my God..He'll kill her".Tara said almost to herself.

"No Tara he wont ki...

"Yes he will."Tara said

"Why Tara, Who is she? Who is the little girl?."Willow said again.

"He's got ..he's Oh God.He'll know now.He'll think I told you."Tara was talking almost to herself now."Oh God..H'e"ll .. He'll kill you too now."Tara said looking around the room still talking more to herself than Willow.

"STOP THIS TARA",Willow yelled grabbing her arm.

Tara pulled away violently,"Don't touch me"

"Tara listen to me. There's a way out of this.You only have to trust somebody."

Tara laughed, "Trust somebody,"She snickered and shook her head"Trust?No I don't trust anybody.Do you realize he's probably watching us right now?Do you?"

"No he is not watching us.We made sure of that."

"We? did you ..We? Oh God how many people..."Tara slowly shook her head back and forth.

"It was all for nothing."Tara said shaking her head,"my father , the trial ,this place.For nothing"

"Your wrong Tara.You are so very wrong.Let me ask you this? What makes you think that he's not going to kill her after you die huh? What guarantee do you have that she'll be safe?"

"Don't you think I know that Willow? Don't you think I've thought about that?I have a choice here in my oppinion and its fight him she dies, don't and maybe she won't."

"Tara , theres room here for another choice.Beleive it or not there is. What Im finding very hard to understand here is why you cant see that the only way she'll stay safe is if you live.Thats the choice here."

Willow reached out and took Taras hand in her own.She brought it to her lips and kissed her palm and held it there.

"All Im asking you to do is trust me as much as you trust him.Please."

TBC

[jay/wt4evr]

dibs

as much as I don't like it it's true that Tara must trust Willow as se trusts Donnie....ugggh that sucks
great update, I'm loving this story

[Zampsa1975]

Good update-y goodness... I hope that Tara really starts to trust Willow... Willow really needs to convince Tara that she can trust Willow and save both Tara and her child...

[MsKittyB]

Wow, this is a powerful statement.

In this moment Willow had taken on every pain, humiliation , fear and anger that Tara had ever known. It was no longer Tara's, it was theirs. The suffering of this woman tore into her so powerfully that she thought she might die of it.

Okay, okay I’ma try to be patient about Donny getting what’s coming to him. It’s kinda big for Tara to trust anyone. Understandable. But she has to trust Willow. I hope that she does, and that she can give in to Willow so she can help her. Wow this story is really astonishing. I cant wait for the next update!!!

[hondos]

jay/wt4evrLook at you with the dibs

Willow as se trusts Donnie....ugggh that sucks

It does dosent it.I hate him to big mean guy.I think youll be happy with the update.I hope Thank for the feedback.You guys are great.

Zampsa1975

Willow really needs to convince Tara that she
can trust Willow and save both Tara and her child...

I think shes coming around.This update might be a start.
Thank so much for the support . It nice helps to get it writen.

MsKittyB

Willow really needs to convince Tara that she
can trust Willow and save both Tara and her child... so she

can help




I think shes getting there.this update should help.
Wow you feedback is so so nice.I got all sniffely.You are very kind.
I have to admit that was one of the updates I enjoyed writing most.Just trying to capture how horrible it is for Tara.I was thinking about when Faith was walking her to solitary how terrible it was for her.Ive tried to make her sort of strong in this story but as I wrote that chapter what i was going to write change completly when I pictured that sinerio.So I let her cry and I was happier with the chapter in the end.
Thanks again so much.
Rose








"So , I guess the first thing we need to do here is talk about what happened with you're father."Willow said."Was he involved in any of this?"

"No, no my father was a good man.
He was killed because of what he knew about Donny and his organization.
He had been investigating them for a while privately. He knew he had to have all his ducks in a row before he could go to anyone and tell them about what Donny was doing.

The night my father was killed Donny had come to the house to ask my dad about why he was asking around about a shooting where Donny had been the responding officer.
Apparently Donny had responded to a call for backup on a standard traffic stop that ended up being a major drug bust.
The first officer had called and said that there was heroin or cocaine or something and a lot of cash.
When Donny got there he called in and said that the two suspects and the officer were all dead.
The two suspects where handcuffed and lying on the curb.
They figure that the officer was still searching the car which is why they would be sitting on the curb.and the officer dead in the suspect vehicle.
All the money and drugs where gone.It was assumed it was a third party who had happened along the bust.
The officer had been shot with his own weapon.
The weapon was gone too.
They investigated and Donny was cleared.A couple of months later my dad found a bunch of money and a couple of baggies of cocaine in the barn underneath seat of the tractor.
He never said anything too anyone about it.
My dad loved Donny.I mean when he joined the rangers you couldn't get the smile off his face for months.He was suspicious about it though.I think my dad started asking around about this more so because he was determined to find out that Donny was innocent of this then to bust him.
Thats when he started to find evidence of other things.Bigger things.
Things that involved people in high places.Many of them in law inforcement.
This was right around the time that I was realizing I was gay.It wasn't any secret that my father disapproved.
We hadn't spoken in months.One night I was out drinking with some friends and I stated doing that I want to fix every problem in my life right this minute thing people do when their drunk.So I went over there.I heard them yelling in the barn ,so I walked over there and went inside and that's when I saw it.Donny,"
Tara stopped then ,needing a minute to let the memory pass so as to continue.Then she looked up and said , "Donny shot my father."

They stopped talking for a minute, Willow taking hold of Tara's hands and said"Do you need to stop Tara?"Take a break?"

"No, if I don't do this now ,I may never finish"
"So I screamed and Donny turned around and saw me.I started to run and he caught up with me.and dragged me back in the barn and pointed his gun to my head and walked me over to where my dad was.
Then he bent down and took my dad's gun and put that gun to my head and handed me his and told me to fire a shot into the haystacks.I said no at first and he said" I just shot our father , do you think that I won't shoot you or Abby"?So I did."

"So now there's your prints on the gun and gunpowder residue."Willow said shaking her head."Son of a bitch.So Im assuming he's wearing gloves ?

"Oh yeah.Then he took me out to the house and made a phone call.He tied me up and gagged me and left for a minute.
About , maybe ten minutes he came back in with another guy and I heard Donny tell him to take me somewhere no one could find me until they could figure out what to do.So this man starts to walk me out to the car and I heard another shot and Donny screamed.
So it was about three days later that Donny came to where I was hidden and showed me a document that Abby had been made ward of the state.
He also said that they were involved with some people who could be in some serious trouble if there were to be an investigation into my fathers death.He told me that my father had managed to compile some very damning evidence against some people in very high places. Then he said you're going to confess to this or Abby will die.
There are people here involved that would kill her the minute if I told them what happened.That their were people in this so deep that his arrest warren wouldn't even finish printing before someone would get to her.If you don't believe me than think about this he said Why are you still alive?

"So that's why they don't just kill you .If you die it could launch an investigation that could possibly expose them.."
They need you to take the fall for this not to protect Donny but to protect themselves.
So that's that.Confession, body , witness,motive end investigation..
They're murdering you legally."Willow answered.

"So he told them I shot them and ran.Then he made me turn myself in.
"At my trial, the attorney I had was one of them.The judge too."Tara said.

"So that's why they went trial by judge instead of jury.This is just unreal."
So when he brings you the pictures, its to prove to you that she still alive."

"They have someone inside CPS.
They drew up some phony papers saying the Abby has been adopted.She hasent.
Someone , one of them has her. If I even try to go through them to help find her, it wouldn't help.Nobody knows where she is.They'll be alerted that I've told someone and they'll kill her."

Tara was crying now.Partly from the thought of her daughter being killed and partly out of relief at having been able to tell someone."
"Im so sorry Tara.So so sorry."said Willow.
She held Tara , rocking her ,comforting her.

After a few minuets she whisper in Tara's ear, "Tell me about her Tara."'Tell me about Abby."

"You want to know about Abby?"Tara said.

"I want to know everything about youTara. I want you to tell me ."Willow whispered.

Tara raised her head and looked at Willow.Then she leaned in and pressed her lips to Willows.






"She's still down there.She come in with the warden wearin' some computer badge."

"Na, it aint no tech . I know all them techs that come up here an' she ain't one of um."

"I don't know her name but I damn sure know her license plate number.She done left her car up out here and drove up in the wardens car."

"Hell yeah. I know its the same gal that come up here yesterday. Red head , fine lookin' gal Im gonna bet ya you run them plates you gonna find out the same. She aint no tech"

"Yep, well it don't matter none cause even if she did come up here to see her didn't happen' no how.Sis done got herself throwd in the hole again.I got a guy workin' the doors done told me."

"Naw Im sure.If She'd a gottin' in there it be on the camera.There aint nothin goin' on in there ."

"Ya I got cha,I'll take care of it before she gets up in there again"

"Yep you just get me that address an' I'll get on down there and do her for ya'"

"Yep alright then.I gotta get back to my post before someone sees I'm gone missin'"

"Yep , we'll be talkin then, allright Donny"

The guard then hung up his cell phone and walked back up to his tower.

Notes=I know people who actualy talk that way in Texas ..really

[MsKittyB]

Holy SHIT!! This is bad isn’t it!! Excuse my French but this is really fuckin bad! I mean like to the third degree bad. Oh god Willow!! Tara! Abby! . I keep telling myself to breath! Cliffhanger much!! Okay, okay I have to calm down! But you cant just leave it there!
*5 minutes later*
Oh by they way Rose lol. Really my reaction had my eyes poppin out of my head. I wanted to know about Abby too. Yea!!! Tara opened up!!
Wow this is like a J.M. Reddman aka Mickey Knight mystery!! *nervous laugh* Which you probably don’t know who or what that is. Anywayz lol please don’t leave it at that HUGE cliffhanger. For the love of Willow and Tara smooches don’t leave it there. By the by, fascinating yet shocking (in a good way) update. Now if only I can tear my eyes away from the screen. I keep hoping your gonna update any minute now lol. Oh and Happy New Years Eve
Oh and Dibs lol.

[jay/wt4evr]

NOOOOOOOOOOOO Donnie knows damn
and NOOOOO wanna more smoochies!!! and wanna know about Abby!!
*pouts cutely*

[Zampsa1975]

Great update-y goodness... Donny knowing about Willow is definately not good... I hope that Buffy & Faith could keep Tara safe in prison and Willow and Anya to find Abby before something terrible happens...

[hondos]

Tiny tiny little update.A little bit smuty a whole lot angstyIm will do another update tonight along with replies cause im a little rushed right now.I hope you enjoy.Oh and keep in mind that old saying about darkest before the dawn.

Tara brought her hand up to caress the side of Willows face.Then she slowly slide it to the back of her head and pulled Willows mouth to her harded.She teased Willows mouth open with her tongue and shuddered at the sensation of her tongue against Willows.She came alive with desire from the mere touch of Willows tongue inside her mouth.She brought her other hand around to the small of Willows back and then with her body she eased Willow down on her back.She allow her body to lie fully on top of Willow and pressed her mouth against hers harder and here tongue slide down her mouth deeper, and with every stroke she increased the urgency of the kiss.

She pressed herself down on Willows body rolling her hips against Willows seeking out there rhythm.Willows hands clawed at Taras back as she tried to pull her down against her more firmly..She open her legs ,wrapping one of them up over her leg as she began to thrust upwards against Taras hip bone.Willow reached her hands up to the hem of Taras shirt and pulled it up her body.as Tara broke the kiss to remove it compleatly.
Then Tara sat up pulling Willow up with her and removing her shirt.Her eyes fell upon Willows breast and it caused her to become momentarily imoble.When the memory of how to move returned to her ,she paused , looked into Willows eyes and slowly , ever so slowly , guided Willow back into the position she needed her in to begin the deconstruction of the wall of isolation and loneliness that those who wanted to destroy her had forced her to build.She was mesmerized , caught completely of guard by the feelings that were taking her over.

Had she ever known this ? Had she ever felt the touch of another who wanted not to hurt but heal? If she had she couldn't remember. It didn't matter.Even if it had been there it would have been forced away by the enormity of the feelings that were taking over her body and soul. She was going to do this. She was going to do this to Willow ., with Willow, and the thought of it alone sparked the beginning of the climax that she knew they would achieve.

This was the hard part. In order to continue she needed to take her eyes off of the face of the woman who lay beneath her.Willows breathing was slow and short and Taras hands shook uncontrolably.Not yet, she couldn't tare her eye's away from Willows face. Seeing what was happing to Willow because of her actions had Tara' so aroused that she thought it might end for her right then. She felt herself begining to twitch and she had to stop her hip movrments,which was no easy task, to keep her orgasm at bay. Slowly she slid a hand up Willows side and to her breast.

She allowed her fingertips to slowly learn this part of Willows body as she ran them up in feather light touches from bottom to tip then down again ,and again .On the next pass she allowed the touch to increase in pressure and the slight caress became a gentle squeeze.


The sound that emerged from Willows throat , the reaction to the touch , Willows mouth fallen open, her head thrown back was too much for Tara and her eyes fell shut and a sound escaped her own mouth that she was sure she had never made before.The pressure increased on the breast that she held and she knew that she had to see it.She wanted to watch her hand as it pleasured and molded Willows flesh.The choice became maddening .

She desperately wanted to look at Willows face yet the sight of her hand as it loved Willows breast captivated her. The decision impossible she chose option C.She began to move her body slowly downward. When her mouth reached Willows breast she let her tongues tip tease a erect nipple with a touch so light it was barley a touch.

There were sounds coming from Willows mouth.Tara thought that perhaphs some of them could be words .Possibly a question. They came out in high pitched notes.There meanings unclear.Was it Willow that was unable to speak or was it Tara unable to hear?

She didn't know, didn't care.She was alive and the teasing had to end. She wrapped her lips around the pleasure point of Willows breast and lightly drew it into her mouth.Willows hands where unable to stay still and they reached for Tara's breast and began to kneed them.Harder and faster became their rhythm and soon hands were freeing centers from clothing.Tara pressed a thigh up and into Willows center and Willows thigh bent up into Tara's.They took there time with their time with this stage of the lovemaking. They wanting to draw it out as long as possible.Tara's breathing was beginning to grow uneven as she pushed herself harder into Willow's thigh.

The pace was increasing now and both women moved there hands down into moist centers where they found the essence of their foreplay and delighted in its texture., temperature and scent.She was ready now.

Ready to give all of it to Willow and take it from her in return.Tara/s hand moved slowly downward she prepared to enter Willow.
Willows hand stopped Tara's before her fingers could reach there destination.
"Tara, look at me."Willow said her words coming out in pants." Promise me you'll never leave me.I need to hear you say it, promise me'"

Tara was frantic now, her desire to take and be taken so strong that she would have promised anything in the world to feel herself be taken to orgasm.But not to Willow.She could not say the words to her knowing it wasn't true.
Panic arose in Willow when Tara didn't answer her.
She was afraid now.Terrified.Trying desperately to hold back the need to repeat the question because she knew what the answer would be.She closed her eyes tightly holding back her tears for just a second more as the question yet again left her lips,"Tara"she said the word coming out in a sob.
"Tell me you'll never leave me"She repeated.
"Oh, please , say it Tara."Willow cried to her
Tara opened her mouth , her voice shaking and said only two words,"Im sorry."
TBC

[whatmakesyouhappy]

dibssssssssssssss

[jay/wt4evr]

2nd dibs!
well, of corse Tara will never leave Willow! right?
update soon?
and HAPPY NEW YEAR!

[MsKittyB]

Umm.. Well that was... I... umm... .
*1 Hour Later lol*
Okay I think you broke me lol. Rose. Sorry I had to get past the to say that lol. I had to brake away from the hude party to read and comment on Saving Us Both. Anywayz awsome/WOW update. Please say Tara's trusting Willow! Please tell me that! Cant wait for the update! Happy New Years.
Now back to the party lol.

[hondos]

Hi guys.Happy New Year to all.
First replies

MsKittyB

This is bad isn’t it

Yes , yes it is.
I

wanted to know about Abby too. Yea!!!

So did Willow.

Wow this is like a J.M. Reddman aka Mickey Knight mystery

He he You know I really dont.Is he good?
Is it a he cause JM and Mickey cin be either or?

jay/wt4evr

NOOOOOOOOOOOO Donnie knows damn
and NOOOOO wanna more smoochies!!! and wanna know about Abby!!

YESSSSSSS
I got ya the smoochies part
So does Willow

Zampsa1975

Donny knowing about Willow is definately not good

No its not. Its bad. Very very bad .

Willow and Anya to find Abby

Well umm I,,,i'm not so sure bout that one there
Happy New Year
whatmakesyouhappy Well yeah for you with the dibbs
.I hope you like the updatesHappy New Year


jay/wt4evr

well, of corse Tara will never leave Willow! right

Not in my world I hope you like the update and Happy New Year To you too



MsKittyB

Okay I think you broke me lol

Well I got a feeling this next update will fix you right up

brake away from the hude party to read and comment on Saving Us Both

Yeah party Well thanks for that. thats nice

Please say Tara's trusting Willow

Ouchie uhoh whats your take on this after you read my update?

Happy New Years

And to you too



TARA'S HEADTara felt her heart breaking. Willow wanted those words so badly but Tara knew.She knew that Donny would never let that be. She knew that in four weeks she would be retried her appeal would fail and she would be exicuted.She would try to explain this to Willow if Willow would listen. She so confident that she can help me.


WILLOW'S HEAD
She was wrong. She was being selfish and she knew.To ask Tara to say that , to try and make her feel something that wasn't there.. She was trying to force this on Tara and she knew. She had fallen in love with Tara, Tara had not fallen in love with her. She never even hinted at it. She was running through the conversations and realized that Tara had never said a word to her that would have suggested it. She had to protect her daughter first and foremost. That was a fact and she knew that. What Tara had suggested on the phone was that they might fuck . That was what it was to her. But it wasn't what it was for Willow. She had convinced herself that she had felt these feeling from Tara not just for Tara and now she had created a disaster .But she had talked to her , opened up to her , told her about what was happening? Why would she do that if...because I told her I could help her . There it was . The truth of it all. She was here to help her , here to try and save her life, her daughters life and she had totally misread. it all. How ridiculous an assumption. How childish and immature to believe in love at first sight. But the passion , that was undeniable and it was reciprocated. She felt that from her. Or did she? Maybe it was just lust . Here was a woman that was in a situation that was almost beyond repair. How could she not crave some release from it all. It didn't matter. Willow was still committed to this.She would still help to save her whether Tara loved her or not. She still loved Tara.She would do anything for her. Anything at all . Even if it was just fucking. If Tara wanted fucking then fucking Tara would get.

"Hey Tara, its okay. Im the one thats sorry not you. I want to finish this. I want to ....fuck you." Willow said."The words stuck in her throat , but she managed them out

"You want to what?"Tara said.

"You know, like you said on the phone.Those thing you said."Willow answered.

TARAS HEAD
Oh God Tara thought.This is what this is about. She's playing a game with me. She is just here to play a game.God Tara you are so stupid.So so stupid. She thinks you're a slut.And why shouldn't she.You did after all say those things to her. Oh God I'm am just unbeleivable.Okay so what then ? I don't know now what to do.
I don't even know how to do any of those things I said on the phone....and I don't have any produce.

Just then she heard keys jingling and Willow knew what it was. Faith was checking on them.

"Oh shit, Tara blow out that candle.Were not dressed."Willow said.

"Hey there , ya'll okay?"Faith yelled.
"Oh yeah, yeah Faith were good. Thanks .Ill be done here in a minute"Willow answered.

"A minute" Tara thought ." She thinks we can finish this in just a minute?"

"Okay then"Faith answered.

"Well um, that was close. Buffy never brought it up but Im pretty sure we weren't supposed to um do this"Willow said
She was glad thou. She knew that she couldn't have gone through with this.Not with her .Not with Tara.
"You want me to relight the candle?" Willow asked.adding please say no please say no in her head.
"No, no that's alright I think I kind of like this .Im getting kind of a headache."Tara answered.
The truth of it was she didn't want Willow to see her face. She couldn't let her see her crying again.
"Well Im going to get dressed then" Willow said as she wiped the tears from her face.

Soon after that Willow said that she had some ideas about how to go about trying to find a way to find her daughter.That hurt her to say because she so much had wanted to hear about her and instead they did....whatever it was they did. Maybe if they had just talked about her she could still believe that Tara could somehow be loving her back.Its better this way anyway. I need to focus on this case and not on all the other stuff."Yes"she said to herself 'this is better"as a new batch of fresh tears began to roll down her face. ,



"So, how did it go?"Buffy asked
"Oh it was good, she um is going to let me try and help her.Its going to be hard and um.."
Willow felt it starting again
"Can I call you about this tomorrow?"she asked"I need to get going. I've got Anyas car cause mine is in the shop and she has an early day tomorrow"
"Okay" Buffy said knowing full well that something was wrong.This was not the women who went in that cell four hours ago.Not even close.
"Oh and Willow?"
"Yeah?"
"Your shirt on inside out."Buffy kept walking and Willow just stood wide eyed staring.

TBC








[/quote]

[jay/wt4evr]

dibsss!
noooo!
why they don't just kill Donnie and go and live happly ever after together??
{banging my head on the laptop}
can't wait for the next update!!!!1

[Zampsa1975]

Great update-y goodness... Tara's & Willow's naked snugglies were nice...

[MsKittyB]

Rose,
Well I can honestly say you never seise to amaze. Really lol. I'm at a lose for words. Oh, oh I can say that I loved how you did the internal thinking between Willow and Tara. That was awesome. It's kool to who what's going on in there head.
<--- hehe my facial expression looks just like this guy everytime I read your updates. It weird lol.
Tis all, cant wait for the next update. So I'll just wait here until you post :
hehe j/k or am I
Happy New Years
hondos

He he You know I really dont.Is he good?
Is it a he cause JM and Mickey cin be either or?

You know, I really have no idea lol. I never thought to look, there no picture either, soooo I lost. But he/she is an brillant mystery writer.

[hondos]

jay/wt4evrOuch.I hope you didnt hurt your hesd.
Donny is going to get alot worse soon.He will get his of corse but I think we need to hate him just a little bit more.
Zampsa1975

Glad you liked the update.Yes.Naked snuggles are very very nice.Thanks for reading and feedback.Hope you like the next update
MsKittyB
Well I can honestly say you never seise to amaze
Your to nice.Thank you sniffleWell I hope I dont disappoint you . The presure, the presureI hope you like this update.Thanks so much again.





Saving Us Both

Raiting NC -17

Author Rosemary

Feedback Okay

This is my first story ever.I would be happy to get any tips or let me know how I can improve or just say Stop writing .Theres no hope for you




Smut anyone?

I hope you enjoy the update.




Willow was the first to push into the other woman and Tara followed slowly behind.She teased Willow momentarily and then she to was inside.Tara push and jerked first slowly then quickly then slowly again creating an orgasm for Willow that would be earth shattering Willow let out a pleasured groan and began to thrust up into Taras rapid pumping fingers.
So this is fucking. . I like it. Really like it. . . Fucking was fucking good.

Tara was pushing into her even harder and a slight bit faster.Willows body flew up into Taras rapidly thrusting fingers.
Chasing them with her sex , then running away. Chasing , running , chasing , running.


Tara worked her with such incredible force , speed and skill that she was going to cum already.This had never happened . Not this quickly. It was epiphany . She felt that Tara deserved to know just how much she appriciated her talents.. .."Ohhh God , ohh Tara ,I'm oh yeah. Make it last baby, please. Ohh, there, right there you found it baby, oh yes there's were it is. there with you... .you, your doing it baby, your making me cum...God ohhh ohh OH GOD YES IOh cuming Im... I am... OHH TARA FUCK , FUCK.,YES AUGG!"

Willow shattered into a million pieces and took no time to recover before she had Tara on her back and began to fuck with everything she had.This was lust and love .This was the single most incredible thing she had ever felt in her life. .
She didn't know what was better the fucking or the being fucked.Maybe it was the same pleasure.
Maybe this, this, returning of the fucking was just the final stage of an orgasm that had not yet worked its way to complition.She was learning a pleasure that in her wildest dreams would have never thought possible.She stared into her lovers face unable to remove her eyes from the sight of Tara as she was beginning to come apart."Im gonna do this to you Tara.Im going to do this to you like you did it to me.Im going to do this to you over and over and over for the rest of my life. You want me to don't you?Tara you want this as much as I want to give it to you don't you?Tell me. Its always better when you say it. Tell me its only me .Tell Im everything to you Tell me I'm yours.Tell me how you want me baby if you tell me ill come with you please."
"I want you Willow. Your the only one I'll never leave you I wont, never. You can take me forever. Take me Willow."Willow was inside Tara as deep as she could be and Tara was going to cum.She saw it in her face and she felt it with her fingers.She was glistening from the sweat that poured from her body and then....



Willow woke with a gasp.Her breathing erratic , her body tingling.She sat for a minute and then she lay back down on her bed. She stared up at the ceiling .Tears made their way out of her eyes and down her cheeks. She hugged her pillow close wishing that see could work magic and bring her Tara to her. Magic, ha ,Ridiclus. God, this must be what it feels like to be dying.


Willow knew she had a tremendous amount of work ahead of her.The work would be all the more difficult due to the fact she had to work in secrecy.If she made even one error she new she would be putting Tara and Abbey in mortal danger.She was sitting at her desk making a list of some of the things she would need to do.Rackingher brain for ideas of how to start the process of investigation. She heard a knock on the door and when she opened it she saw Anya standing there.
"Hey Anya. What are you
doing here?
"Coming to ask you the same thing."she answered.
"Oh well I told Giles I needed to take care of some stuff from home so, here I am.Please come in.
"Is this about the death row case?"Anya asked
"No, no, its something different".She said.She had decided that the less people knew the safer they and Tara and Abby would be.
"So why are you so tense?You look like hell"Anya asked.
"I don't know.I didn't get much sleep last night."She answered."Oh, and thanks again for letting me use your car."
"Sure anytime."
Anya walked a little bit farther into the room and sat on the middle of the floor."Come here Willow."She patted the ground next to her.
"Why?"Willow asked suspiciously.
"Im going to show you how to relax..Just sit."
Willow went against her better judgment and followed Anya's instructions.
"Good. Now.Cross your legs and make two okay signs with your hands."
"What are we doing here Anya.Im really sort of busy now.
"Just do it Willow .I promise.It will help."
"Alright , fine."
Okay now turn your hands palm side up and rest upper arms on you knees."
Willow complied , just wanting to get it over with.
"Now move your hands like your playing an accordion but slowly."
"Anya please this is .."
"Oh come on Willow .Just do it.Now pick up your accordion and start again."Anya went on"Now close your eyes and thing about something nice like Brad Pitt or ..oh Sorry no wait Angelina Jolie for you. Okay , Is she there.?"
"Um nooo..I don't think.."
"Alight now keep playing and sway side to side just a bit.Okay?"
Willow sighed and went along knowing the sooner this was over with the better
"Find your circle , find your circle , "Anya chanted
Willow felt like an idiot.
:Okay now you say it."
"No I wont say that .It stupid'
"Pleaseee.Come on Willow."
Willow sighed "Find your circle , find your circle" ,'Willow said without enthusiasm or cadence.
"Good but needs to be just a touch more chanty"
"Don't push your luck Anya"
"Fine, whatever. Now lose the acorian and put your arms out all the way side ways like this."
Willow imitated the woman and stretched her arms out..
"Know repeat after me."
Willow looked at Anya and saw that she had started flapping her arms back and forth.
"Im a butterfly, I'm a butterfly, Im a butterfly, Im a butter...."
"That's it.Get out Anya. Leave my house"
"Jeez your grumpy..
Anya smiled and stood up."Will you be in tomorrow?"she asked
"Yes ill be in'
"Okay ,'Anya smiled, Bye"




TBC

[MsKittyB]

Wow.. that was.. wow Oookayyy ummm.. I'll be right back *runs to take a nice COLD shower*
Okay I'm good lol. Rose. DIBS!!
I can honestly say, this update had me lookin like this and then this (Cause it was just a dream, a very erotic dream, that I wish happened between them lol) and then this guy . Anya is to funny in you story lol.
hehe I really enjoyed reading this update. And I definally cant wait for the next.

[hondos]

"Hey there Donny. Ya get me that address?"
"Yep alright then let me get a pen."
"Alright, yeap, yeap got it. Im gonna go ahead and send them boys on down there then."
"What was the name you got off them plates? Anya Jenkins. Yeah aright then"

The Guard hung up his cell phone and then typed in a number."Yeah I got a job for ya"




Anya returned home after stopping by to see Willow. She was concerned for Willow. She had never seen her in this state before.She knew the woman love her job. She had admired her work ethic and on occasion had even envied it.She was a natural. What was bothering her more was that she felt Willow was not just in a funk over a case but sensed that it was something more than that. She would talk to Giles about this in the morning. She knew she was betraying a confidence , but she knew also that if it where her Willow would do the same.She pulled into her driveway and got out of her car and searched her keychain for the right key.She entered her apartment and headed for the bathroom. It was a long day and she just wanted to take a long bath and get to bed.She went to the tub and turned on the fausets.She began to unbutton her blouse when someone grabbed her from behind and covered her mouth. She was taken to the kitchen and placed in a chair at her dining room table.There were two men now and one had a gun pointed to her head her heart was pounding in her chest.She was gagged and one man walked to the table and unloaded the contents of a paper bag. Inside it was a small bottle of what looked like pills and a bottle of Jack Daniels whiskey.. The man then walked over to Anyas desk and picked up a pen and a writing tablet.
He sat down in a chair in front of her and said, "You're going to do everything I say alright ?Now tell me where you keep your drinking glasses". She was terrified and she lifted a shaky hand and pointed to a cupboard next to the microwave.The second man walked over and retrieved a glass and brought it over to the table. He then instructed her to open the bottle of whiskey.She complied and was then told take the bottle and pour a glass..She did as told ".All right , good girl. Now I need you to write a letter."



"Well isn't this the pot calling the kettle black."Willow said aloud to herself. She had been at work for nearly three hours and Anya was yet to come in.She picked up her coffee cup and took a swig.She was instantly sorry for that cause the coffee in the coffee cup was actually milk.Warm , sitting around for God knows how many days milk."
She spit the contains back into the cup and turned it around .Masking tape.. Andrew. Well that's it now she was pissed. He was famous for this.Leaving things sitting around.Food and drink things..She set the cup down and headed for Giles office to confront him.She came to the door and knocked. Andrew answered and Willow started in ."Andrew, why can you never clean up after yourself. I was just nearly poisoned by your ..."She stopped .She looked up and Andrew was just standing there, not a word not moving and , oh God , he was or had been crying.She looked around and saw Giles sitting at his desk with a look that ment only one thing. Her mind raced , Tara , something happened toTara. No , no ,that's not it. They would have no reason to be upset by that.
"What , what is it?"Willow said.
"Willow please sit down. There's something I need to tell you .It's a .. Its bad news."
"What , come on just tell me."Willow said
"Its Anya"

Willow arrived at Anyas apartment and lifted the the yellow crime scene tape and stepped underneath. She looked around for a moment and then she saw her.She was face down on her kitchen table surrounded by police and forensic officer.Her hand immediately raised to her mouth as she felt the contents of her stomach working their way up.
She dashed outside thinking Anya would be very upset if she were to hurl on her carpet. The thought confused her.
She didn't need to worry about that now did she. 'Oh God, Anya" Willow said.
She leaned up against the entry wall of Anyas apartment and slowly slid down.Her friend, her funny, quirky , love of life friend. Dead. She put her head in her hands and began to sob. The officers inside turned around when they heard the crying and one of them approached her.
"Miss , can I help you?"he asked.
Willow looked up at him , shook her head and said,"No."
"Are you a friend?"
"Yes , a friend and colleague"She answered.
"Do you mind if I ask you a couple of questions?"
"No that's fine. But first how did this..What happened?"
"Well apparently Miss Jenkins committed suicide with a mixture of over the counter sleepaids and whiskey"he answered
"No,no no, no way.She wouldn't ..Never."Willow Answered
"Well she left a note over there and so far it seems pretty solid that this is indeed what happened. Were having it sent to a handwriting expert to match it.She wrote in there about knowing that she was going to be caught and not wanting to go to jail.Something about extorting money from clients. There's a bankbook over there and it's got some pretty hefty deposit in it.Were cross referencing them all of course , but it seems pretty cut and dry.

"No".she said,"Your wrong. She didn't ,wouldn't not ever"
"Well I hope your right , but right now its what we have."
"Im sorry for your loss"the officer said .



Willow drove home in a daze. She couldn't believe it. This was wrong.Totally and completely wrong.
She couldn't think of a single solitary reason her friend would do this.
Then it hit her."Oh no, this is my fault."
The realization hit Willow so hard she had to pull over."Its them.They did this.It has to be."
But why ?How .She had nothing to do with this. Nothing at all.
Wait, her car. I drove her car to the prison. They thought she was me.They killed her because they thought she was me. I gotta go to the police.I have to tell them.
No , I cant.If I do that they'll kill Abby and Tara.Oh God. What am I gonna do.
She reached into her pocket and took out her cell phone.
"Buffy ? Its Willow .I need to talk to you. Someplace other then there."

TBC

[jay/wt4evr]

dibs!
oh god this is getting worse

how about this now we hate that jerk enough?
pleeeeeeaseee update soon

[Zampsa1975]

Good update-y goodness... Killing Anya was not very nice of Donny's boys... I really hope now that Willow & Co find a way to blow Donny's brains out and make him confess that it was him that killed his father and "kidnapped" Tara's daughter and forced Tara to take the blame...

[hondos]

Sorry, no update. Just feedback.First the feedback for the previous chapter then the feedback for the last.Okay here we go





MissKittyB

a very erotic dream, that I wish happened between them lol) and then this guy . Anya is to funny in you story lol.

Im sorry I missed your feedback from the last chapter.That has happened twice now once to you and then once to jay/wt4evr and Zampsa1975...Im very sorry. I liked Anya in the show. I always thought she was just a blast. I had to have her in this story if only to amuse myself. Well, I think that we will see some good stuff happening for Willow and Tara soon. I think with this last update Willow is going to understand just what Tara is so afraid of with these people. I dont think she quite got the reason why Tara was so freaked that she was aware of the fact that he had her daughter.I don't think she beleived that they could be watching them that night either.She though Buffy and she had that pretty much covered.Now she knows.








jay/wt4evr

dibs!

Good for you with the dibs

oh god this is getting worse

how about this now we hate that jerk enough?

We've gotta a little more hating to go. This is just the first straw that will eventually break Willows back and she takes the matter into her own hands. I hope you keep reading. Its going to be bad for Tara and Willow for a few chapters here , but thing will be looking up soon.Thanks so much for the feedback.



Zampsa1975

Killing Anya was not very nice of Donny's boys... I really hope now that Willow & Co find a way to blow Donny's brains out and make him confess that it was him that killed his father and "kidnapped" Tara's daughter and forced Tara to take the blame...

No, they are not very nice people at all. I promise that Donny's brains and other parts will soon be gone.He's gone one step to close to going one step to far. He is going to piss off the wrong person here real soon and all I can say for his fate is OUCH Thanks for reading. I will have a new update soon. Its a long one. The longest one so far so by the end of the day here I will have it up.


Thanks to you all for the feedback. Its nice.
Rosemary

[MsKittyB]

Okay, okay. Thing is you want me to be more patient about killing Donnie, but your making it a thousand times harder. Cant someone just and kill him. I mean of course kill him in the most brutal way ever. But then he'll be dead! Which means Happy Ending? Right?
I did enjoy the update. though. Although Anya's dead, I can honestly say NOBODY was expecting that.Well me anywayz. Which is kinda evil .. But AWESOME lol.
Cant wait till the next update. Now I know that you'll never know whats gonna happen in a mystery. Cant wait. B.T.W Please say something brutal's gonna happen to Donnie Please .

[hondos]

Hi Guys. I'm giving some warrning here that there is a bite of a harsh scene in here.I hope you all don't hate me to much for it.
Also though , there is good stuff in here to.I hope you enjoy it.

MissKittyBI promise that Donny will get it bad.Very very bad. I think this next update is the begining of his demise.You'll need to wait to see why and by who but...its there I promise


He sat and watched the little girl as she concentrated on the picture she was drawing.
She stopped for a minute set her crayon down and tucked a strand of long blond hair behind her ear.She scooted a bit in her chair trying to find the most comfortable position .
She picked up her crayon and returned her focus to her drawing.She was a beautiful little girl.Big blue eyes and long blond hair. She was funny and smart and she loved to tell him knock knock jokes. They would do it for hours on end at times.
" Mr. Bill"?she said
"Yeah Lil' Ab?"he answered.
"When you going to bringed Spooky again?"she asked.
The man chuckled a bit and answered "First of all , little bit, it's bring , and second of all he was just here yesterday."
"Yeah I know but I still didn't get to finish teachin' him his alphabet."she stopped drawing looked up pointed her crayon at him and said,"We only are on "g".and nodded matter of factly.

She loved too play with Spooky. He was a Red Lored Amazon Parrot who had exceptional talking skills.He'd had the parrot for a good five years. It used to be that Spooky would only let him pick him up or give him scritches but Abby had stolen his heart away.
Now , if they were all there together , he went directly to her , would climb up her shirt and perch himself directly on her shoulder.
There he would stay till it was time to leave , getting his fill of scritches and alphabet lessons.
All he would get is a growl, and sometimes bitten, when it was time to go.and he tried to retrieve him from her shoulder.
He smiled at her and then shook his head and laughed."Right then, I guess we can't very well have him running about only knowing half the alphabet now can we?"

"Your silly," she giggled "That's a whole lot less then half."she said making a wide circle motion with her arms to indicate just how much more then half was left.

"How's it you so smart at only four years old? Knowing the whole alphabet is something most people don't learn till their at least six?"he asked.

She looked up smiling at him nodding her head in agreement and said,"I know, but my mama taught it to me when I was a really little baby."opening her eyes wide on the word really to drive her point home of just how long ago it was.

He looked at the little bit of a thing that sat in the chair talking and drawing,even smiling.

He'd been lucky so far today.She hadn't asked the question of her moms whereabouts . He knew that she would eventually. She always did. Every single time for the last eight months.
"Mr. Bill , is Christmas gone yet?"she asked.

This was a new question.He thought for a second.The truth was it had. It had come and gone two months ago. She had no way of knowing that though.The only thing she had seen in the last eight months was this room. Not even a room really. Just a basement with a bathroom. No windows, no bed , no kitchen. Nothing.The only people she saw were various people who came to make sure stayed put.There job , if the call came to , kill her.

He bent over in his chair , hands folded , arms resting on his legs and stared at the ground for a minute.

His decision made as to how to answer the question, he looked up and said, "No".He lied,"if Christmas had come Santa would have been here right?"

"Ooh yeah" she said ,"That's right"a smile on her face,her little eyes lighting up as her feet swung back and forth under the little plastic table she sat at .
"She looked at him and asked"Do you have Christmas in England?"

"Well of course. They have Christmas everywhere."
"And Santa ?"she added
"Yes, and Santa.You know what? Funny you bring it up because I was just going to tell you, Christmas is tomorrow."

"Huhh".She let out an excited gasp."Really?"

"Yep , and I bet Santa's gonna bring you a really great present."he said" What would you like Santa to bring you?"

She looked up at him, a sad expression on her face and said, "My mama."as single tear escaped her eye and rolled down her cheek.

Spike looked at her, his head tilted sideways then down, one hand rubbing his eyes, and said under his breath,"Bloody hell.This has to end."





"Maclay, you got a visitor".
Tara looked up at the two guards who was standing in her cell.She got up , put her hands behind her back and turned around to allow them to cuff her hands.She knew the routine. They then proceeded to exit the cell and take the walk down the hall to get to the visitors area. Something was off thou. She knew almost instinctively and panic began to build in her.They took a turn down the hallway and she heard one of the guards say,"Is it clear?"
"Yeah" Go ahead."
"What the hell are you doing ?"Tara asked.
The answer she received was a punch to the gut that doubled her over.
"You don't ask the questions.We do."
She was then taken into a small space that Tara now knew was a janitors closet.
She was pushed up against the wall and she was greeted with a violent punch to the face.The blow caused her head to smack against the wall behind her and before she could even realize it had landed she received another to the other side of her head.
"What did you tell that lawyer "one of the female guards spit out at her.
"I don't ..I don't know what you mean" she answered her head bobbed lazily on her neck as a result off the blows to her face.
There was another blow now to her stomach and she again doubled over this time falling to her knees.
She was reeling now , barley conscious ,"I didn't tell her anything.You know that"she answered
She felt o foot then connect with her side and it sent her toppling over and down.
"What did you tell her Maclay?"
"Nothing, I told you , why do you think I'm stupid?"she answered
A foot then slammed down onto her hands that where cuffed behind her back and the pain caused her vision to go black.She wanted to scream out in pain but she refused. She would not give them the satisfaction. It was the one thing she could hold onto to allow her the slightest bit of dignity to remain intaced.
Another kick, this time to the back of her head and it knocked her completely to the ground.
"Ya know Maclay, it doesn't really matter now , she went home a few days ago and found that she just couldn't do the things she was doing anymore. Yeah, turns out she liked to take advantage of her position and use it for illegal gains.Can you imagine that?"
"Oh God "Tara thought."Keep cool , keep cool"she told herself.
"Yes ma'me She sure did."The second female guard told her.
"Found her face down at her kitchen table laying in a glass of Jack doped up to the eyeballs.Sad really.She was so young"

A pitiful sound escaped Taras mouth.She could take the pain of the beating , but this, this.Her Willow dead .
She wanted to scream.
She wanted to cry out from the pain of it but she knew she couldn't. If she showed any kind of feeling for Willow, Abby was as sure as dead.
She needed to play the game.
Put on the face of stone and move it along.
"I told you, I didn't say anything to her."Tara said
"Yea we know you didn't.You see Donny just wanted to send along his condolences personally.Give you a little reminder of who's in charge."she said to Tara.
"Now get up."The second guard said.
Tara struggled to her feet and when they felt she wasn't moving fast enough they helped her along by pulling her up by her hands which were cuffed behind her back.The unnatural possession of them causing pain to shoot up her arms and down her body.
"You know Sherry , this one just can't stop getting into fights. I don't know what to do about it."

The second guard answered "Yeah your right about that.I say three or four days in the hole will fix this right up."
They both laughed.






Tara sat in the darkness of the solitary cell.She wouldn't dare tell them they where doing her a favor by putting her here. There was no light at all and she could cry all she wanted knowing that no one would notice.She could sit and pretend she was somewhere other then this.At this moment in Tara's mind there was a picnic. She was sitting on a blanket spread underneath an Oak tree near a lake. She was smiling, barefoot ,her toes pulling at the blades of grass that surrounded the blanket.She was smiling at the sight before her. She saw her Abby , eyes turned up to the sky. She was watching the kite that resembled a mother duck , followed by the tail of the kite that were designed to give you the impression that they were the ducklings swimming after their mother.

She let her eyes wander downward where she followed the kites string to find the kites pilot.
She was wearing a long summer dress with a print of white roses on a field of light green.
Her red hair flowing freely around her shoulders as she ran with the kite her beautiful smile lighting up her face as she ran.
She watched as she noticed that Willow turned in her direction and she stopped .
She looked at Tara.Their eyes locked.

Willow brook the gaze momentarily to turn to the little girl that was squealing in excitement over her new kite.

She handed her the reel and told her to hold tight with both hands.She then turned back to Tara and slowly walk over to her.
She knelt down on her hands and knees and crawled over to where Tara was. She sat up on her knees and ran her hand up along Tara's face and tucked a lazy strand of blond hair behind her ear.

"Hey beautiful." Willow said as she brought her hand slowly down her face, tracing her lips with her thumb momentarily before cupping her cheek,leaning in and placing a gentle kiss on her lips.

Tara's hand rose up behind Willows head and gently held her there.
The kiss broke and Willow looked into Tara's eyes.Her head turned slightly sideways with a quizzical look,"What?"she said to Tara.

Tara looked into Willows eyes , hoping that her own would help to express what she felt at this moment.

"I love you Willow"she said.She stayed there .Locked in Willows eyes
Then Tara broke the silence of the dark cell that she sat in and said aloud"I'll never leave you"



TBC

.

[hondos]

Willow was numb. She felt sad, frightened , exhausted and above all angry.
She just couldn't believe the events of the last twenty - four hours.
The tag line, "My name is Jack Bauer ,and this is the longest day of my life,"ran thru her mind forcing, her to add pathetic and insane to the list of things that she was.

She had told Buffy to meet her here at the small coffee shop in Downtown Spring. She usually love it here. The little Dutch candy shop , the Christmas store , the glass works , the very strange and off the wall clothing stores . Today they were simply shops. She could care less.

She heard the bells jingle at the front door of the shop and turned around to see that it was Buffy.
She waved a hand to Buffy to indicate where she was and quickly retracted it , feeling rather stupid as she realized she was the only one there.
"Hi , what's wrong Willow?"Buffy asked
"Anya's dead".Willow answered
"What?, How?, Buffy asked.
"Suicide , only not"
"Im lost now tell me what you mean?"
"She's dead Buffy.They killed her"
"Are you sure ?I mean maybe she did kill herself"
"No, she did not kill herself. She was at my house with me not eight hours before.
We were sitting on my floor ,playing accordions and being butterflies."
"You and Anya , by yourselves , being accordion playing butterflies ?"Buffy said with raised eyebrows.

"Well no, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie where there to but that's beside the point."
"I don't want to now Willow."
"No, you really don't.Look Im not crazy.
We were destressing.Destressing or unstressing, I don't know.Anyway trying to relax.Some kind of meditation thing. Look, I know her.There is no way that she killed herself.You remember I told you that I drove Anya's car to the prison?"
"Yeah?"
"I thing someone used the license plates to get her address and killed her thinking it was me."Willow said.voice shaking.
"Well even if they did , the name would come up wrong so how could they think it was you?"
"I think maybe they matched the name too the records at the prison for the day I first came there .Anya was with me.It would come up a match.They ran or drivers licenses at the front desk when we where there.She came at the same time, same building , same visiting status."
"Shit,you're right."Buffy said.
"Is there anyway you can see if someone ran a check on the names for that day?"
"I don't know Willow.I'll have to ask on of the security members."Buffy answered
"No, you can't.They obviously have people inside there and then they'll know that we know that they know we where there that night.Wait.Is that right?"Willow ran the sentence threw her brain again quickly,"yeah that's right".
"Damn it.What about Tara? What if they...,?"
"No they won't.They want Tara to be executed for this. They need this whole thing to die with her. They can't afford to draw any attention to this case."
"Well the one thing I know for sure is that they need to believe that I'm dead.That way Tara and Abby will be safe for a little while at least."

Their talk was disturbed by the ringing of Buffys cell phone"Hey .What's up?"
"No I'm sitting here with Willow , Tara's attorney or deceased attorney"she looked to Willow and mouthed "Sorry"
"No no, that's okay.Im not offended.I'm deceased".
"Never mind Faith, I'll explain later"
"When? Oh God.Is she okay?"
"What is it Buffy, is it Tara?"
Buffy held a hand up to Willow indicating that she wanted her to wait.
"Alright. I'm on my way."
"Buffy what?"
"So much for not wanting to draw attention to the case"Buffy said
"That was Faith.She was just down in SOL passing dinner trays.She found Tara.unconcious.."
"Oh God, Buffy I need to see her."
"You can't. You're dead remember?"
"That's right.Damn it.I have to see her Buffy."
"Okay, wait.I have a plan."
"Well yea cause the last one worked so well."Willow said sarcastically.
"Hey"Buffy said pouting.
"No, Im sorry.Im just a little..
"In love?"Buffy answered
"That obvious huh?"
"Yeah, just a little."
"Okay. What's the plan."Willow asked

TBC