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TITLE: Close Quarters
AUTHOR: Laragh
CHAPTER RATING: PG-13
DISCLAIMER: Willow, Tara and any other characters from the Buffy the Vampire Slayer franchise belong to Joss Whedon, FOX, ME and a whole host of other entities, none of which are me.
SUMMARY: What happens when Willow and Tara are thrown together far away from home? Tara has secrets, Willow has a lonely past. They both want to be loved. Can they find it together? (Of course they can, this is me!)
SPOILERS: AU fic, so at most minor references or pieces of dialogue
FEEDBACK: Yes please
Chapter 3/20
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“Well this rocks!”
Tara looked over at her roommate.
“W-what?”
“We have almost all our classes together!” Willow exclaimed happily as she sat on her bed, holding hers and Tara’s class schedules beside each other, “All except our languages, but we already kinda knew that. Yep, English, History, Biology, Math...all together. If that’s not a sign we’re supposed to be friends, I don’t know what is!”
Their welcoming dinner had gone off without any fuss, the general student population too absorbed with seeing their friends again to notice that they had a new girl or to make the time to go out of their way to ridicule the redhead. Willow had been particularly happy that, for the first time since she’d been in that school, hadn’t had to eat alone.
All the senior girls had been brought together in the common room after their meal to hand out their class schedules and school laptops, as well as being read off the typical school rhetoric of how important their final year of school was and how they all had to knuckle down and study.
“R-really?” Tara asked, sitting on her own bed, “T-that’s good.”
“Yea, we have Ms. Bolton for English first thing tomorrow morning,” Willow replied, picking up her pencil case from the nightstand next to her bed, “Here, I’ll colour code all our classes so you can see.”
Tara was going to protest that that was unnecessary but Willow was already happily running her markers along the pages so she let her continue, before casting a wary eye to the end of the bed at the laptop she’d been handed. Willow looked up just in time to see the look and a small giggle left her mouth.
“Want your first computer lesson?” she asked as she set their schedules to the side, “You can totally use my notes until you get the hang of it, don’t worry.”
Tara visibly exhaled and Willow stood up, reaching under her bed and picking up a laptop that was different in styles to the school’s one. The redhead saw Tara look at it in confusion and started to explain.
“Oh, this is my own one. I use the school one for homework and stuff but mine is a way better model, it has my personal stuff on it. I’ll teach you how to access your homework stuff on your one, but mine is better for learning just how to generally use a laptop. That okay?”
Tara nodded and Willow continued walking over to her and sitting beside her on the bed, both of their backs against the wall.
“And is this okay?” she asked quietly, knowing her friend had been hesitant in any type of close contact before.
Tara nodded again and Willow smiled, grabbing the laptop and unzipping it from its case, pulling the machine out and resting it on the brunette’s lap.
“Okay, so you just turn it on by pressing this little circular button here,” she started, pointing to the power button.
Tara put her finger over the button and pressed down lightly, but nothing happened. She frowned but felt Willow put a hand over hers and pressed down more firmly, the laptop suddenly springing to life.
“Like that, see?”
Tara nodded again and watched as the display lit up and flashed through different screens until it settled on her screen saver, a large smiley face.
“Um, ignore the babyness,” Willow said, gesturing at the desktop, “So we’ll start with the basics for now. Hey, do you have facebook?”
Tara looked at the redhead completely bewildered and Willow chuckled.
“Right. Never used a computer before. Sorry. It’s, um, well it’s a social networking site. You have a profile and can add pictures or whatever you want really. And there’s games, lots of stuff really! Oh and you can poke people!”
Tara’s eyes went wide.
“Y-you c-can w-w-what?”
“Oh,” Willow shook her head with a grin, “It’s not anything...it’s like a virtual nudge. It’s fun. We should make you an account!”
“Um...isn’t...” Tara remembered something she’d read in the brochure that had been shoved in her hands when she’d been told she was going to boarding school, “Don’t the school monitor those?”
“Oh yea, but not if you’re sneaky,” Willow replied with a grin, before it faltered slightly, “I had to make a new account last year. My old one was all public and stuff, that’s how everyone found out...you know, about the gay thing. There wasn’t even anything that obvious on it, just the groups I was a part of and stuff. Anyway, I have a new one now and its super private, only people I want to be able to see it, can. We could do the same for you, if you wanted.”
Tara gave the redhead a sympathetic smile before shrugging.
“I w-w-wouldn’t have any f-friends.”
“You’d have me.”
Tara’s face brightened to a degree Willow hadn’t seen before and she blushed slightly, but didn’t avert her gaze.
“Okay. H-how do w-we do it?”
Willow beamed and moved the laptop so she had better access to the keyboard as she started typing and clicking buttons.
“I’m just connecting to the internet, it’ll take a sec,” she explained as she typed.
“I t-thought the o-only i-internet access was in the l-library?” Tara asked, more of the brochure coming back to her.
“Oh, it is, but the teacher’s lounge has Wi-Fi, um sorry, it has internet access for anyone within a certain range, it’s easy to hack in to. Um, to get into. Idiots don’t even password protect it. But, uh, can that be a roommate secret? It wouldn’t be good if the faculty found out.”
Tara took in what the smaller girl was saying and finally nodded.
“S-sure. B-but w-won’t they k-know if a, um...facebook?” her statement came out as a question and Willow nodded that she’d gotten it right, “If a facebook p-page c-comes out i-in my n-name?”
“Ah, see that’s where we get sneaky,” Willow replied, grinning again as she brought the facebook browser up on screen, “We don’t use your full name. Like I’m just Willow R. So you’d be Tara...hey, I don’t know your surname.”
“M-Maclay,” Tara answered, “It’s M-Maclay.”
“Maclay,” Willow repeated, more to herself, “Tara Maclay. That’s really pretty.”
Both girls blushed at the words, Willow not having meant to say them aloud and focused back on the screen.
“I’ll, uh, just set you up with a different email account. Not using the school one is part of the sneakiness,” Willow said, typing away, “So, uh, just Tara M, is that okay?”
“S-sure,” Tara nodded, still blushing.
“Okie dokie,” Willow breathed, typing in all the set up information quickly, “So, ah, we just fill out your basic information. Birthday?”
“October 16th. I-I’m 17.”
“Mine’s the 18th,” Willow smiled, “We’re practically twins.”
Tara smiled too and watched as Willow continued to type things, asking her questions along the way.
“So, you’re female...”
“Yea,” Tara replied with a quiet giggle.
“Okay, and I’m gonna say ‘looking for friendship’ ‘cause you can get some weirdos adding you if you say dating and stuff. But that won’t happen, ‘cause like I said, I’ll make it super private but just to be on the safe side. Uh, political views?”
“Um...Obama?”
Willow giggled and wrote it down, while Tara thought that if she’d said that to either her father or her brother, it would have warranted a beating for sure – they were hardcore Republicans. She felt liberated that she could speak more openly with the redhead.
“Religious views?”
Tara again thought of her ‘family’ and how any answer other than ‘Christian’, devout at that would not have been received well. But again she felt compelled and more importantly, able to answer honestly. She felt more at ease than she had in a long time.
“Just spiritual really.”
Willow wrote down the word ‘spiritual’ in the space provided, before turning to Tara, almost shyly.
“You haven’t stuttered in a couple of minutes.”
Tara couldn’t help a small smile when she realised the redhead was right. She hadn’t not stuttered in years, not even for a single sentence.
“I guess you make me comfortable.”
“Good,” Willow whispered with a smile before focusing back on screen, “Good. So we need to write you a bio. Like a biography. Just to sum you up in a few lines.”
Tara shrugged, not knowing what to say.
“Okay, how about...” Willow replied with a grin, seeing the brunette was struggling, “Hmm... ‘My name is Tara, I’m 17 and I have a really cool friend named Willow’.”
Tara gave a small laugh and nodded.
“Sure. Write that.”
Willow stuck her tongue out between her teeth excitedly as she typed before moving on to the next section.
“So, um, any interests?”
“Um...I used to horse ride?” Tara answered as a question, unsure whether that counted, “I haven’t for a while, but I guess that’s an interest.”
“Horse riding,” Willow wrote with a shudder, “Not big on the horses myself. Bad birthday experience with a pony. He thought my arm was a carrot. I see horses and I think ‘really big pony’.”
“He tried to eat your arm?”
“Well...” Willow replied with a shrug, “He looked like he wanted to! If I gave him half a chance he would’ve been chomping at me like I was his last meal.”
“Willow,” Tara said with a giggle, “I don’t think horses like arm much.”
“They could!” Willow protested with a pout, “They’re not safe.”
“Well you could ride with me sometime. I promise safety and fun.”
Tara couldn’t believe how easy-going she was acting, and...
Did I just flirt?
Willow seemed pleased by the statement though, as illustrated by a blush and a smile and they filled out the rest of the sections quickly until Tara realised the redhead had, purposely she could only assume, neglected to fill in two of the boxes. She looked between the two headings and hesitantly pointed at the first one.
“I’m single,” she said, before taking a deep breath, her voice coming out shaky and in a whisper as she moved her finger down to the ‘interested in’ box, “And women.”
Oh my god. Oh. My. God. Did I just come out? Daddy always said it was wrong, so wrong, but she...she can say it. She likes girls and she can say it. She’s not wrong. I like girls. I really, really like girls. One girl in particular. Whoa, Tara, one thing at a time. You like girls. You know that. You’ve known that forever. And now you’ve said it.
“Uh...” Willow was completely taken aback but moved the curser over the appropriate box and ticked it, “Right. Awesome. All filled in.”
Oh my god. Oh. My. God. Did she just come out to me? She likes girls! I wonder if she could ever like me...? Whoa, one thing at a time, Willow. She likes girls. You know that now. And that’s...that’s something.
“I’m gay,” Tara said in a whisper, to herself, “I’m a lesbian.”
Willow looked at the brunette strangely for a second before realisation crossed her features.
“Is that the first time you’ve ever said it out loud?” she asked softly.
Tara turned her head to meet Willow’s gaze and blushed slightly but nodded.
“I’ve, um...always known, but um...everyone always said it was so wrong. But it’s who I am. So if that’s wrong, then...How did you know I’d never said...?”
Willow grinned and shrugged.
“Dunno. Just one gay girl to another kind of thing I guess. And, Tara, it’s not wrong,” she replied and shook her head emphatically, “It doesn’t matter. Love is love.”
Their gazes locked again and neither said a word until Willow looked away, exhaling slowly.
Another one of those damn confusing ‘moments’. Even more damn confusing now.
“You need a picture!” Willow said, trying to ease the tension, “No profile is complete without one.”
“P-picture?” Tara asked, sighing at the return of her stutter and taking deep breaths to try and lessen it again, “I don’t have any pictures.”
“Well, here,” Willow replied, pointing at the small camera on the laptop, “We’ll take one. Smile!”
“Uh, wait...”
Willow smiled at her friend’s shyness and shuffled her body closer to the brunette’s.
“We can take one together, how about that?”
Tara seemed hesitant but nodded and smiled as Willow brought the webcam up on screen and focused a shot. Both laughed when the snapped picture came up on screen; Tara was smiling warmly and Willow had her tongue stuck out.
“Okay. That can go up.”
Willow giggled as she uploaded the photograph before showing Tara her completed profile.
“There you go. You are now officially a member of the facebook universe. Now I’ll just add me as a friend...” Willow typed in her email address in the ‘add friends’ section and quick as lighting logged out and back in to her own account, accepting the request, “And I’m your first friend!”
Tara looked at the line on Willow’s profile that said ‘Willow R. is now friends with Tara M.’ and smiled.
“Yea, you are,” she replied quietly, before noticing something on Willow’s profile, “You didn’t tell me I could have a picture of a kitten as my picture...”
Willow blushed at her profile picture, a kitten playing with a ball of yarn and shrugged.
“You didn’t ask.”
Tara was about to respond when she noticed something else.
“You like Doogie Howser? I watched that all the time growing up.”
“Really?” Willow asked with a laugh, “Me too. I love Neil Patrick Harris. When I was little I used to imagine that I used to like work on a sitcom with him. Then I just started writing Doogie fanfiction. But, um, you can just disregard that last sentence.”
Tara complied with the redhead’s wish, having no idea what ‘fanfiction’ was anyway.
“So, uh, I should probably teach you something other than how to mess on facebook,” Willow continued, “Unless you just wanna talk for a bit? We’re gonna be living together for nine months, we should know some stuff. You know, other than shared childhood love for teenage doctors.”
Tara gave a small laugh and nodded.
“Okay. Let’s talk.”
Willow shut down the computer and put in on the floor before settling on the bed, her feet beneath her.
“So, um, I can start if you want. Well, I’m 17, you know that, turn 18 two days after you. I’m Jewish, but not really practicing, more just in tradition. And um, only child, which you probably guessed as well, given my parent’s attitude or rather un-attitude towards me. I had one friend when I was little, Xander, but he moved away when we started junior high. I was on my own back in California then. I was – well, am, this huge nerd so I kinda got targeted by the cheerleaders, one cheerleader in particular, Cordelia. She pretty much made my life living hell from grades 7 to half-way through 11 when I had ‘Cordy is a bitch’ projected on the wall during the winter dance – that’s why I got expelled by the way. Like it’s my fault they left the projector room wide open for anyone to use.”
“They expelled you just for that?” Tara asked softly, “I mean, I can see why they wouldn’t just let it go, but being expelled seems kind of...harsh.”
“Cordy’s Dad is on the Board of Directors,” Willow sighed softly, “Had I known that I probably wouldn’t have done it. Irony was, I was actually happy when I found out I wouldn’t be able to go back to that school, ‘cause at least I’d be away from Cordelia Chase, but then I get sent here and what do you know, it’s Cordelia times 100. But you’re here now, so that’s...that’s definitely of the good.”
Tara blushed and ducked her head, her inherent shyness still quite present, even though the redhead was doing an incredible job of putting her completely at ease and making her happy.
Happy...that’s not something I’ve felt in a while...
The brunette snapped to attention when she realised Willow was looking at her expectantly.
“Oh, um...well I grew up in Alabama. Just me my m-m-mother and f-f-father and brother, Donny. My m-mother died 5 years ago.”
Willow frowned, both at the piece of information and at how much Tara stuttered over than sentence. Family was clearly a touchy subject.
“Tara, I’m so sorry. That really sucks.”
Tara shrugged and gave a small sniffle.
“Yea. So it’s j-j-just been me and b-b-brother and f-father since. T-they don’t...w-w-we’re n-not...um...”
“Hey, it’s okay,” Willow said quickly, seeing her friend was struggling, “You don’t have to talk about that. We can talk about something else. Pets! Did you ever have any pets? I had fish once but they died.”
“W-we had a cat when I was little but she ran away,” Tara replied, thankful to be off the subject of her family, “No pets since. And um, before when I said you were my first friend. I didn’t just mean on facebook.”
“Really?” Willow asked, feeling sadness at her friend’s heartache, “Well that’s the people of Alabama’s loss. You’re a wonderful friend. And hey, two loners sent to the same boarding school in some obscure town in Switzerland? We were destined to meet.”
Tara smiled and was about to respond just as an errant yawn left her mouth. Willow glanced at her watch.
“8pm,” she said before realising something, “Which means its 3am in Alabama. I’ve been operating on Swiss time for the past week or so at home so I wouldn’t be jetlagged when I got here. You don’t exactly get time to acclimatise; they just throw you straight into work.”
“That’s...really smart,” Tara replied sleepily, wishing she’d thought to do the same.
“Whoever’s on night duty isn’t gonna come around ‘til like 11 to make sure it’s lights out and stuff, but we could, you know, wind down our room now?” Willow suggested, “If you get a good night’s sleep now the jetlag might not last long. It’s dark out, I dunno whether you need darkness to sleep, I know I do, but anyway, it’s dark if you do and I can like, read under the covers or something ‘til I’m sleepy, I have a flashlight and everything.”
“I might go to bed,” Tara replied, her eyes drooping, “But keeping the lights on is fine.”
Willow smiled and shook her head, waving a hand in front of her.
“It’s fine, really. I like reading under the covers. Makes me feel like I’m little again and I’m having a sleepover. Not that I ever had a sleepover, what with Xander being a boy and all my parents didn’t think it was ‘appropriate’. How little they knew, right?” Willow grinned, before seeing her friend was struggling to keep her eyes open, “Okay, it’s definitely sleepy time for you.”
Tara yawned again and nodded, standing up and grabbing her pyjamas from the wardrobe. She disappeared into the bathroom for a few minutes to get changed and do her nightly routine. When she walked out, the room was in complete darkness except from a circular light coming from Willow’s bed.
“Willow, you can keep the lights on,” she said with a laugh as she slipped beneath the covers of her bed, “It’s okay.”
“Nah, I’m comfy,” Willow replied, knowing the brunette would probably get a better and full night’s sleep in the darkness, “Night, Tara. I’m really glad you’re my roomie.”
Tara smiled as she settled her head on the pillow.
“Goodnight, Willow. I’m glad you’re my roomie too.”
The room lapsed into silence as Willow read beneath her covers and Tara started to drift off to sleep, her thoughts swimming.
Not even a day...not even a day and I’m away from my father, I came out, I made a friend and...
Tara opened her eyes for a moment and looked at the figure of Willow sitting underneath her blanket.
And, yea, I’m pretty sure I’m in love.
Last edited by Laragh on Wed Dec 14, 2011 7:32 am, edited 2 times in total.
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