SO happy that you and your story are back!!

I missed it so much!

Buffy meeting her mother was very touching.

And Tara's and Willow's connection is really lovely.

I can't wait for more!

great update!

snuggle79

__________________

"I got so lost"

"I found you, i will always find you"

The lovely thing about being away is that I can come back to read two parts of this. As always, I'm touched by the powerful emotions you can convey between these people. I think what touched me most in this was Anya. You've encapsulated that agonising grief that was evident in The Body and here it's made all the worse by the palpable sorrow of Dawn and Faith, who didn't even know Tara! That's wonderful.



Buffy's return home to see her mother and that moment when she hugged her was amazing. I really did love that idea of a "silk shoulder" and her mother's surprise at the force of Buffy's love. How wonderful. I'm not ashamed to say I shed a tear over that.



Thank you so much for this. It's a wonderful return to the heart and the importance of the show. I'd forgotten how great these characters could be.

La la la, la la la-la la; la la la, la la la-la la ~ The Wisdom of Kylie...

Since I dumped the show that shall not be named two month ago in favor of the Pens (and I so not regret it), I really should do more feedback. Unfortunately I'm lazy and slow - before I can post, someone else has already said what I wanted to say... only much more eloquently.



So all I can say is that I really enjoy this fic. I even can feel some sympathy for Buffy again - and that's the biggest compliment about characterization I can come up with in the moment.



And to help those who still say "huh?" about a certain topic, let's get really geeky:



Ockham's razor



Ockham's razor (also spelled Occam's razor, pronounced AHK-uhmz RAY-zuhr) is the idea that, in trying to understand something, getting unnecessary information out of the way is the fastest way to the truth or to the best explanation. William of Ockham (1285-1349), English theologian and philosopher, spent his life developing a philosophy that reconciled religious belief with demonstratable, generally experienced truth, mainly by separating the two. Where earlier philosophers attempted to justify God's existence with rational proof, Ockham declared religious belief to be incapable of such proof and a matter of faith. He rejected the notions preserved from Classical times of the independent existence of qualities such as truth, hardness, and durability and said these ideas had value only as descriptions of particular objects and were really characteristics of human cognition. Ockham was noted for his insistence on paying close attention to language as a tool for thinking and on observation as a tool for testing reality. His thinking and writing is considered to have laid the groundwork for modern scientific inquiry. Ockham's insistence on the use of parsimony (we might call it minimalism) in thought resulted in some later writer's invention of the term, Ockham's razor. Among his statements (translated from his Latin) are: "Plurality is not to be assumed without necessity" and "What can be done with fewer [assumptions] is done in vain with more." One consequence of this methodology is the idea that the simplest or most obvious explanation of several competing ones is the one that should be preferred until it is proven wrong.



(found at whatis?com)

_______________________________
Gib deine Hand, du schön und zart Gebild, Bin Freund und komme nicht zu strafen.
Sei gutes Muts! Ich bin nicht wild, Sollst sanft in meinen Armen schlafen. --- Matthias Claudius

Yee Haw....an update!



I like the way you've set the next bit of info up by surrounding it with moments from the past. Willow, relishing her time with Tara, but still not being able to hide the truth. And Buffy's reunion with her mom, very sweet.



I really enjoyed Anya. She's always been one of my favorties, and never gets the credit for who she is and what she knows. The gang is quick to jump on her for everything, but she has feelings too. Plus, Faith is just cool.



looking forward for the next update-

hermitstull

"...and if you've got no other choice, you know you can follow my voice, through the dark turns and noise of this wicked little town..."--Hedwig and the Angry Inch



"Stinky herbs are a go." Cordelia in Becoming pt. 2



"I am an opera singer, I stand on painted tape, it tells me where I'm going, and where to throw my cape..." Opera Singer by Cake

That was a great update! Willow and Tara w/ all the making out, love it!! Willow is definitely making changes, i don't know how this will affect their time but you'll make it worth our while right??



Buffy had a pretty nice reaction with seeing her mom again, very touching moment! But i hafta say i favored Willow's reunion w/ Tara in the beginning a lil more!



I know Anya and them are gonna figure something out and get em back, just hope there's a way they can take Joyce and Tara with em.



Can't wait 4 more!



~Ashley~

Willow: We can come by between classes. Usually I use that time to copy over my class notes with a system of different colored pens. But it's been pointed out to me that that's, you know... insane.

Tara: I said quirky.

I see I'm not alone in going "Yay! You're back!!"



I was missing this a lot, esp. since Season 4 is done. And I have to tell you, the greatest thing about this is wracking my brain trying to figure out how in the world things are going to get back to the way they should be, with Willow and Tara in their right time, etc. Since I can't even begin to imagine, you are going to astound me. Right on!



Oh yeah, Flaming O! Too true, too true.

Edited by: Big Dummy at: 12/2/02 1:07:34 pm

oh, lady xomel...



sorry to bump up the thread for any kittens who are waiting, but I do believe that today is thursday, and we were promised an update...and I'm here all sick and grumpy, like a lesser-known mucus demon with hellmouth-worthy ooziness, muchly wanting update goodness to make it all better!!





...was that shameless, or pathetic? or both? I can do both.



--jenny

WILLOW: Why is it always the end of the world? Couldn't it be the end of cheese or something?

--Tempus Fugit(S7) by Lipkandy






"They don't have legs...creepy eyes...and who the hell knows how they breathe. Doesn't make sense." --my girl defending her fish-fear

I love how grief runs through both threads of this story; Anya and Dawn grieving for Tara in the present, and Buffy and Willow finding an end to grief in their lost loved ones of the past. It's all so connected, but Anya's last words left me with a sense of foreboding that the restorations of the past can't push away.

--

"Omnia mutantur, nihil interit." -- "Everything changes, but nothing is truly lost."

hey everyone,

thanks for all the incredible feedback. I'm sorry there's no update, but I'm sick, sick, sick (could you please pass the tissues jewwitch?). actually, I have written something, but the brain fog is so thick that I have no idea if it's even coherent. and has anyone else noticed that real life doesn't stop for sickness, but everything else does? what's up with that?



so I'm writing a letter:

dear Real Life,

could you please shut up for a second and let me write some fic? or even let me just read some fic?

and while you're at it, could you slow down a little? and quit being such a hardass...



and I'm totally sick-y babbling now so I'm gonna stop. but there will be updates as soon as the fog lifts. I miss our girls too much... ugh!

Well we could send an angry petition to Real Life. But instead we'll be patient kitties and just wait.



Take care of yourself.

---

I happen to think mine is the level head,
and yours is the one things would roll off of.

Part VIII

Buffy groaned at the wonderful pain in her stomach. She hadn’t felt this full and content in years. After dinner they had decided to make cookies and watch a movie and now, ten cookies and two glasses of milk later, she was cursing her total lack of willpower when it came to her mother’s baking.
       
"Owww," she moaned out loud and felt her mother chuckle behind her as she ran a cool hand through Buffy’s hair. "I think you did this on purpose." Her eyes closed under her mother’s comforting touch.
       
"What?"
       
"This," she pointed weakly at the remaining cookies on the plate. "You’ve clearly been replaced by some evil Mom monster who’s trying to trap me here with yummy baked goods," she snuggled into her mother’s side, "and dangerously comfy PJs."
       
"I see my evil plan is working."
       
Buffy laughed at the playful tone of her mother’s voice. "Totally. I don’t think I’ll be able to move for at least a week."
       
Strong arms wrapped around her and she closed her eyes letting herself sink completely into the comfort of her mother. The world smelled like cinnamon and cookies and Mom and she was sure there had never been a moment in her life as beautiful as this one. It was safe and warm and even the Slayer in her seemed content. Or at least, seemed to be napping.
       
Meg Ryan’s voice finally filtered down through her senses and she opened her eyes to take in the strange sight of the blonde actress in black leather riding a motorcycle.
       
"See! Meg Ryan is hot…kind of….don’t you think? I mean, she’s cool with the hair and the…well, I don’t know what she’s doing in leather, but… cool … right?"
       
"Well I happen to think Meg Ryan is very cool, but I’m not exactly an expert."
       
Happy with her mother’s answer, Buffy closed her eyes again and pulled a blanket over the two of them. "Yes you are a certified expert because you are the coolest mom ever."
       
She felt the low rumble of her mother’s laughter against her back and smiled. "Thank you honey," her mother sighed and stiffened slightly. "But I am still a mom and so it’s my job to be uncool and ask you why you were crying earlier." She felt a light kiss on the top of her head and began to relax. This wasn’t an inquisition, this was her mother, holding her safe, trying to help.

But that brought her back to what wasn’t in the upstairs room. The device. And everything that meant. This wasn’t right. She wasn’t in the right time and her mother was dead there. Dead and gone. Willow’s warning about changing things suddenly echoed through her mind making her forehead tighten with worry. She turned gently to face her mother, to make sure that she was still there. And alive.

And she was. Buffy hit ‘pause’ on the remote and took a deep breath.

"Mom? What if you…I mean, if you could go back in time and change something…anything. What would you change? Or would you?"

Her mother was quiet for a while as she studied the familiar pattern of the blanket, her brow furrowing in concentration. "Hmmm. You mean, do I regret anything?"

Regret. There was that word again. The theme of her life in the real now.

"Yeah…maybe."

A soft laugh shook her from her thoughts. "Well, I definitely wouldn’t have been so hard on you about the slaying," she brushed blonde hair away from her daughter’s face with a sad smile. "I’m still sorry about that, you know."

"Really?" Buffy’s lips quirked into a surprised smile. "No apologies necessary." She took her mother’s hands in her own and squeezed. "You were just doing your Mom duty, trying to protect me."

Her mother sighed and shook her head, "But I made it so much harder for you when you needed me the most."

"Mom, really, it’s alright. No childhood trauma here okay?" Buffy squeezed the hands she held in her own and watched as her mother blinked slowly in her signature gesture of acceptance. "But that’s it? You wouldn’t change anything?"

Deep lines formed between Joyce’s eyebrows as she considered her daughter’s question. "Well, I probably would have had another baby." She smiled suddenly removing a hand from Buffy’s to push back an errant lock of hair. "You know, you always did want a sister. A nice, normal sister to drive you crazy and steal your clothes."

A sister. Dawn. She felt the tears threatening. Her mother had never told her. And she would have another baby. Soon. A teenage baby. But not a normal one. Her mother was doomed to having extraordinary daughters whose lives were foretold in ancient manuscripts, written in the stars.

She stared into her mother’s smiling eyes and realized that no matter how extraordinary Dawn’s origins were, she was just a teenage girl who had lost her mother. And she was her sister. A sister who was stuck in the future without this. Without cookies, and home and another chance to see her mother. One more thing Buffy couldn’t share with her.

The tears surprised her, rolling down her face before she could stop them.

"Oh, honey, it’s okay." She wiped the tears from her daughter’s face. "You’ll always be enough for me," hugging the crying Slayer to her, she murmured low. "And you’ll always be my baby."

After a few minutes, Buffy’s sobs subsided, but she didn’t withdraw from her mother’s arms.

"Buffy. You don’t have to tell me what’s upset you. I just…" she felt her mother draw a deep breath. "I don’t think you have to go back in time to make things right."

She pulled back slowly, wiping tears from her face. Could she tell her mother? "But what if… what if they’re gone and you can’t…?"

A sad smile crept across her mother’s face. "Is this about..." she began, but trailed off a frown forming on her face. "Buffy, I don’t believe anyone’s ever really gone. But maybe you shouldn’t concentrate on the past, on what you think you’ve done wrong. Maybe you should think about what you can do to make things right…now."

Buffy nodded absently, studying the beautiful lines of her mother’s face. She was right. She was always right in the way mother’s are.

But what was now? And when?

****
Dawn swept shards of broken glass and a few chicken feet into the dustpan and coughed through a cloud of black dust. They had been cleaning for over four hours, but it hadn’t made a dent in the mess of the store. At least it was easier than sitting around waiting and wondering about Anya. Where she was. What she was doing. It wasn’t that she didn’t trust Anya really it was more that she didn’t trust the Vengeance Demon. And there was always the possibility that someone had made a wish. Over the past hour she had meticulously gone back through all of her interactions to make sure she hadn’t unwittingly verbalized the hope that had kept her company during the many nights she spent alone in the empty house. Tara. But it would be so easy…

"Shit!"

A warm smile played over Dawn’s face as she leaned against her broom to watch Faith struggle with an enormous display case that was listing dangerously to one side. The Slayer fought to hold the case with one hand while bracing it with a scrap of two by four. Finally, when the structure was relatively stable she stepped back to survey her handiwork. Dawn began to clap and whistle. Faith took a deep bow before throwing a clump of some unidentifiable herb in the teenager’s direction making her squeal in mock horror. In retaliation she showered the Slayer with chicken feet.

"Okay, that is just… foul!" Faith shuddered and carefully, almost daintily, removed one blackened claw from her shirt with two fingers. "And I’m thinking if I look anything like you I definitely need a shower." The Slayer wiped at something on her cheek creating an enormous black smudge on her already dirty face.

"Yeah, it’s so important to look your best for a demon."

"A very hot demon," the Slayer teased raising her eyebrows.

Dawn shook her head again in disgust. Faith attracted to Anya was just so wrong. "Didn’t you get enough of the bad girl action in the big house?"

"The big house?" Faith asked, her eyes widening in disbelief. "Okay, Half Pint…"

"Don’t Half Pint me!" She snapped. "I’m not a kid. I know what goes on in...those places." Dawn threw her head back angrily. She was so tired of being treated like a child by everyone. And she had always counted on Faith to treat her as an equal. Until now. "I know you were the alpha chick or whatever ‘cause of the Slayer strength… a-and you had a harem of hot chicks who were your bitch-…"

She was interrupted by a stunned Faith, her palm extended toward the teenager in the universal ‘shutup now’ gesture.

"Okay, first of all D, you’ve been watching way too much TV ‘cause, believe me, there are no hot chicks in the slam." She lowered her hand and smiled wickedly. "Well, okay, maybe one or two," the dark Slayer shook her head, her playful smile fading.

"The slam," Dawn repeated to herself. "That’s so cool. But you were definitely the top chick with all the bitches or whatever right?" Dawn continued, hands on hips in her best Faith impersonation. She expected a quick comeback or put-down, but the dark Slayer just studied her carefully for almost a minute.

"Yeah, I was the alpha chick for a while," she began carefully, her eyebrows drawing together into a hardened frown. "And then I wasn’t." Faith turned and began to pick up larger pieces of charred wood, throwing them into the refuse pile in the center of the room.

"What happened?" Dawn made sure to keep her tone low, careful not to break rhythm of the conversation. As far as she knew Faith had never opened up to anyone. About anything. No one knew anything about the dark Slayer.

"I don’t know, lots of things," she said quietly as she hurled an enormous piece of drywall onto the pile. "I guess I got sick of beating the crap out of everybody," she continued and began yanking at an enormous beam jutting out of the wall. "I know, hard to believe, huh?" Dawn held her breath. She could feel it. She was so close to something important. She watched as Faith struggled with the beam and then stopped abruptly. "And then… you know… Angel told me about your sister… that she’d been killed or whatever." Dawn watched the Slayer carefully. Watched her wince at the painful memory and then shrug it off before returning her attention to the wall.

And it was over. The moment was gone, but Dawn had what she needed. Or the beginnings of it. A piece of Faith, the real Faith. And Buffy. Because she had known it from the beginning that Faith and Buffy were two pieces made to fit together, but time and experience had worn and broken the edges. Reshaping them both until the seams were obvious, the gaps too large to overcome.

Be careful. Because Faith is like a wild animal. Like those squirrels you're always trying to feed in the park. Any sudden movement and she'll bolt.

Okay, probably more like a feral cat than a squirrel...

"So, is that why you’re out? Good behavior or whatever?"

With a loud groan, the Slayer freed the gigantic beam from the wall and dragged it to the pile. "Don’t you people watch the news?" When she didn’t get an answer, Faith turned to Dawn, her trademark smirk replacing the thoughtful smile of the previous moments. "Juvenile offender." She rolled her eyes. "Once you turn eighteen they have to let you go and your record’s all squeaky clean."

"Really?"

"Yep," Faith just nodded and turned back to the wall to busy herself with cleaning up. "So if you’re gonna murder anybody, do it now."

"Well, the only person I’d murder is Spike and he’s already dead so…"

"Ew! What are you two doing? You’re making a mess in my store!" Dawn jumped at the sound of Anya’s voice and then moved quickly into irritation.

"For your information we were cleaning your store, but don’t thank us or anything," the teenager shot back testily.

Anya’s nose crinkled in disgust as she surveyed the blackened forms of the two women.

"Well stop because nothing’s getting cleaner and you’re now both just in desperate need of a shower."

Dawn dropped the broom handle placing her hands on her hips to begin an angry retort, but she was interrupted by Faith’s low voice.

"Is that an offer to help," Faith wiped her palms slowly on her shirt and eyed the vengeance demon. "With the shower? Because I definitely need help with all those hard-to-reach places."

"Please." Anya rolled her eyes and crossed her arms. "I don’t date Slayers. You’re all too butch."

"Who said anything about dating?" Faith shifted her weight from one hip to the other and Dawn watched in horror as Anya raised an eyebrow openly appraising the Slayer. As if she was actually considering it. The shower. And that brought up all sorts of disturbing thoughts about Faith and hot water and…Anya. Yuck.

"Hello! Impressionable teenager in the room!"

"She started it," Anya pointed at a completely non-plussed Faith. "And you can’t have it both ways. One minute you want to be treated like an adult, the next you’re all ‘oh please, don’t harm my innocent ears with your lesbian flirting and vague oral sex references…’"

"Oh my God! Stop! Please!" Dawn brought her hands to her ears. Sometimes the vengeance demon was like an unstoppable avalanche of words. Disturbing, inappropriate words that tumbled into the room without warning. Like an x-rated version of Willow babble. And that brought the teenager back to the reason they were here. Willow and Buffy. "Anya. Focus. Please." She sucked in an enormous breath. "What did you find out about Buffy and Willow?"

Anya again rolled her eyes and shifted effortlessly from innuendo to serious discussion. "Well, it’s not good, but you already knew that."

Dawn glanced worriedly at Faith who held her eyes and blinked slowly once to let her know that it was going to be okay.

"Well where are they and what is that silver thing and why does it seem like Tara’s in the room and…?"

Dawn felt something squeeze her hand and looked down to find the Slayer’s blackened hand in her own. She hadn’t even noticed that Faith had made her way to her side.

"It’s complicated." Anya sighed and stared at the hole in the ceiling. "The silver thing is called Occum’s Heart and it’s," her brow furrowed in frustration. "It’s kind of a time machine. But not. Which would be complicated enough on its own, but Willow’s involved so it’s like a thousand times …"

"So how do we de-activate it?" Faith interrupted.

"We don’t. I mean we can’t. It’s a spell. Someone cast it and the Heart just acts like a power cell kind of."

"Okay, well what’s the spell? And who is this Occum person?" the teenager quizzed and felt Faith squeeze her hand before releasing to cross her arms.

The vengeance demon took a deep breath as if preparing herself for a long monologue. "Occum’s not a person. He or she was some kind of super witch who was probably demon,"

"He or she?"

Anya resumed her explanation with increasing irritation. "It’s a legend. No one’s really seen this thing, it’s sort of like the demon Holy Grail. And ‘he or she’ because no one knows and demons sometimes have multiple genders so…oh! and it could be an ‘it’ because Ishn’al demons have like five different sexes…"

Dawn sighed and felt her jaw clench in frustration. "And what does it do?"

"Well, instead of doing it with just a penis or a vag-"

"No!" the teenager yelled in frustration and embarrassment. "The silver thing…Occum’s Heart!"

"Oh, that." The vengeance demon continued obviously disappointed that her explanation of demon sexuality was cut short. "Well, Occum supposedly made it after his or her lover was killed as a kind of second chance. A way to go back in time and do it over. Get her back." Her forehead was lined in concentration. "But it’s really way more complicated than that and if you weren’t rushing me and interrupting every two sec…."

"So Willow used this guy’s heart to go back in time and save Tara or something?"

"See, like that. Interrupting is just rude," Anya pouted and crossed her arms again tightly around herself. "And I’m already late for a meeting in Bangkok."

Dawn was absolutely furious, the rage welling up in her in a terrible wave. She wanted to beat Anya senseless. Making them wait for hours only to rush off to some meeting somewhere without really telling them anything. And that was the other infuriating thing. She wasn’t really telling them anything that could help Buffy. She took a step toward Anya ready to scream at her when she felt Faith’s hand on her arm.

"Look, we’re really sorry…it’s just B and Red and the whole apocalypse thing has us a little edgy you know?" Dawn was stunned into silence. Why was Faith being all nice? Shouldn’t she beating the demon senseless by now? "And thanks for, you know, helping us out."

Anya’s expression softened a bit and a slight smile formed on her lips. "No ‘thanks’ remember? Not doing this for you." Her forehead furrowed again and she took a deep breath. "And anyway, I don’t think it was Willow. I think Willow tried to stop it. With magic."

"But why…"

"It’s only for one person. Not two. So I’m thinking Buffy must have somehow activated it and Willow went all black magic trying to…"

"But Buffy would never…I mean, what would she want to change?"

Anya threw her hands up in the air and shrugged before moving to gather a few items from behind the counter. "That’s not really important is it?"

She felt as much as heard Faith slam a fist against her own thigh.

"So we’re just supposed to sit around and wait for them to come back?" Faith’s voice came out as more of a growl.

"I told you it’s not that simple. Willow’s magic interfered with the spell so all bets are off. And Vra’al’s definitely going to want his heart back and rumor has it that for some reason he thinks you have it and the Key which is some kind of big bonus," she gestured toward Dawn. "So if I was you…"

"What?" Faith barked beside her. "Who the fuck is Vra’al?"

"Major underworld player. Ten feet tall supposedly, but, you know, demons are like human men," she rolled her eyes in disgust. "Always exaggerating."

"But I thought…" Dawn began, stumbling in confusion. "I mean, it’s Occum’s Heart right?"

"Well, yeah!" Anya shook her head at Dawn’s ignorance. "It was once he took it from Vra’al."

She felt Faith’s tension build beside her. "But this Vra’al guy doesn’t have a heart so how is he gonna…"

"Oh, he has four other ones. That was just his favorite. And minions. Did I mention minions?" Anya waved at them, distracted. "Sorry, but I’m late…."

"Anya! You can’t just leave us like this," Dawn yelled in desperation. Things were moving too fast. And once again, someone she needed, someone she depended on was leaving. "Can’t you do something? You deal with this reality time stuff all the time."

That seemed make the vengeance demon pause for the moment at least. Inhaling sharply she said, "I can’t. For about thirteen different reasons. And don’t ask me to explain because you can’t understand…"

"You mean I’m too stupid," Dawn muttered angrily crossing her arms in front of her.

"No I mean you really can’t." Anya answered without a hint of her usual condescension. "Human brains just aren’t built to think that way." She sighed again angrily and continued. "But the main reason is that D’Hoffryn forbids it. No one is allowed to interfere with Willow Rosenburg in any way. Period."

"What? Why?"

Anya shook her head sadly. "How should I know? I just work there." Anya grimaced and looked in her bag. "And I really have to go, like, now or I’m gonna get fired. And that word has a whole other meaning when you work for a demon." Dawn watched a sad smile take hold of the vengeance demon’s face.

"Are you coming back?" she asked weakly.

Anya looked genuinely surprised. "Do you want me to?"

And that just made her angry for some reason. How stupid were these people? She may not be able to understand multi-dimensional time reality stuff, but she could see that they should be together at a time like this. "Yes! Jeez!" Dawn exploded shaking her head in exasperation.

And then the absolutely impossible happened. Anya hugged her and gave them both a shy wave before simply vanishing.

"Great. Now what?" Dawm looked around the ruined interior of the store and thought of her sister and Willow stranded somewhere in the past. And there was nothing they could do to help them.

"Well, I guess it’s time for me to find some weapons and slay this four-hearted Vra’al guy."

"Oh yeah," she answered with a smile because if nothing else she still had Faith. And when facing a demon and his minions that was a lot.

TBC

sorry for the lack of W/T in this update. I promise to post their section when I have a brain that isn't cherry-flavored-cold-medicine mush.

edited because I forgot to turn off the frickin' HTML and lost everything!!!! including all the feedback feedback. and I'm too furious right now to write any.

edited again because I forgot to past Buffy's section! OMG I'm going to bed!!

and edited again to deal with an annoying typo. maybe I should start a 'find the typos' thread or try that whole beta thing (GF's sick too)-- ack!




Edited by: lipkandy at: 12/10/02 10:34:49 pm

Doesn't sound like the end of the world to me yet.



So a demon is going to threaten Dawn... this is *bad* how ?? : --> Just tell the demon that Occam stole the heart and to go and bother him about it. If it was that long ago, why does the stupid demon just miss the heart *now* anyway ?



I can imagine Faith and Dawn trying to clean the store but that's something Anya could easily do with her magic in about 5 minutes or so . Neither Faith or Dawn are really needed anyway; Willow and Buffy have to return on their own and as long as the device they used is stable and they actually CAN get back... why bother getting all upset. Go and hide somewhere safe.



And no matter how many times Dawn says otherwise; she is still a kid, unless she stops acting like one. Besides, technically she's like 3 years old Planning on beating a Vengance Demon senseless, yes that will work. She'll just teleport away and not return anytime soon. Dawny is forgetting who asked for help in the first place, at least Faith was smart enough to ask nicely... guess she learned some tact.



I don't like Dawn very much, can you tell ??



I doubt Faith was in prison for the 1st degree murder on the professor; she wouldn't have been released so soon if she was (besides I sincerely doubt juveniles are released on their 18th birthday, heh). She probably only plead guilty to some assault charges and maybe manslaughter on the deputy mayor, although I would expect a longer sentence for that as well. She sure as hell didn't come completely clean, heh. (much debate about that on discussiongroups btw.)



Since Dawn obviously knows Faith was in prison, does she know why Faith was in there ? I doubt Buffy would tell nice stories about Faith for some reason



Grimmy

"You hurt Tara," Willow said too calmly. "The last one who tried that was a god. I made her regret it." -- Unexpected Consequences by Lisa of Nine

Faith is being ever so helpful with advice (about murdering people while under the age of 18)! Can't wait to see her kick the 10 foot tall guy's ass.



And is Xander going to show up at any point? Do we even care?



Great update, even though it is lacking in W/T goodness. But I'm sure that's to come soon. I hope you feel better.



Yana

It was heart warming to see Buffy and Joyce back together and to know that Joyce always wanted another child before receiving Dawn.



Your Anya is awesome, just the right mix of abrasive, caring, difficult, and incomprehensible. She's so right about the time travel; human brains like causality and single realities.



Oh, and I liked the double meaning of Dawn having Faith. I think she'll need both.

--

"Omnia mutantur, nihil interit." -- "Everything changes, but nothing is truly lost."

phew! now that I've had a nap and calmed down a bit I'm gonna make an attempt at some halfway coherent feedbackfeedback.



and I forgot to add that those of you who haven't read the S4 Tempus Fugit, it's helpful, but not essential. plus it's a lot lighter



hermitstull thanks! I think the memory issue is so big in this fic because I so desperately wanted to rewrite the past couple of seasons. notice they're jumping back to S4 not S5 or 6. and Anya every time i start writing her I just get possessed and end up with four more pages than I intended. gotta love anya



missquirkyI hope I'll make it worth your while. W/T will end up together, alive and in love...eventually. is that what you mean? and yes, I'm kind of partial to the W/T reunion smoochies myself.



bigdummyyay! you're still reading! I always look for your feedback. but ack! I hope i can deliver on the 'astounding you' part



jewwitch I hope you're all better. although, if you have the same thing I have it's supposed to be a week and a half of fun. but I seem to remember a promise you made about a holiday fic with lots of naughty dreidel fun which would make everyone feel so much better



darkmagicwillowwow! and wow! I'm a big lurking fan of The Dark Rose BTW. and I'm glad you're in agreement on the whole causality-centric, linearity of the human brain issue. I've been trying for years to wrap my feeble monkey brain around time without any success. then again, Willow is a bit of a superhuman... and Anya...I'm loving her more and more every time I write her. she was supposed to just be a minor, uncredited player in this fic. hmmm, I guess if I was ME I'd make her die a hideous death in front of Dawn right about now.



mollyigthank you and I think we could all use a petition to Real Life.



grim yes, I too hate Dawn, but I'm trying to turn her into something less hateable. and she does have her uses . as far as the Faith/juvie issue, I don't have the official court documents, but I ran it by the defense attorneys in my family (Mom's ex-girlfriend and her new girlfriend) and they (I'll paraphrase here -- they are long-winded attorneys after all) said it was plausible.



yana hmmm, Xander... who is he again? refresh my memory. and what 16 year-old girl whose sister is being stalked by a murderer/attempted rapist couldn't do with a little sisterly advice like that?





thanks for putting up with all my sick whiny ramblings earlier and the late-itude of the update. I'm off to work on the W/T goodness.



xomelissa



edited to add the S4 link

Edited by: lipkandy at: 12/9/02 7:35:17 pm

Beautiful.

Hey Lipkandy--I just read the last 2 updates.



I have to say that the first one really hit me; certainly for the Willow and Tara connection and the beauty of those moments (as well as the poignancy of Willow's inner anguish and fear), but even more by the scene b/w Buffy and her mother. I suspect that anyone who has lost a parent whom they love was affected by those moments, those exchanges. I know I certainly was. The whole chance to see the person even if it's just one more time; the rush of gratitude for things taken for granted for years upon years; the fierce rush of memories based in smells and comments and the tiniest of nuances in facial expression...you wrote them so powerfully.



That whole aspect of this (S7) arc is just an amazingly aching and bittersweet one.



Thanks for the incredible work.

Lipkandy,



Glad to see you back! Feel better soon.



I thought this was a great chapter, and (believe it or not) didn't even notice the absence of W/T until you mentioned it. I was too caught up in the depth of Buffy & Joyce and Dawn & Faith. You did some remarkable things there. By creating a prior relationship between D and F, you back-project this marvelous understanding of Buffy and Faith's chemistry as seen through a child's emotional intuition. Great stuff.

"Why did I have to be so veiny?" -- Alyson Hannigan

The scene with Buffy was very well done. Her dilemma in that she wants to just revel in her Mother's company but is aware that she has to figure out what action to take.



Sometimes the vengeance demon was like an unstoppable avalanche of words Love this description of Anya. You're portrayed her so well. Firstly, her speech pattern - her propensity to lecture rather than just speak when she was telling of the story of Occum’s Heart. Then how easily she was sidetracked about the gender of Ishn’al demons. Typical Anya.



Again I'm really impressed with the dynamic between Faith and Dawn. It seems so natural.



Thanks, and take care.

---

I happen to think mine is the level head,
and yours is the one things would roll off of.

hey xomel,



yes I am feeling better, and I hope you are too. chug the echinechea, if you got it. great update, hon! I agree that you continue to deliver the best-of-anya (is there an anniversary album for that?) I liked dawn's insight; she does do "x-rated willowbabble." so true.



and I really do like your dawn. yes, we all know dawn is annoying sometimes, but for god's sake, I was ten times worse in the bitch department at her age...and I can relate. not in the demony, key-to-multiple-dimensions way, but...in the angsty teen with little-to-no-stability-at-home way. so, yeah. dawn continues to bring great insight. and I really like how she sees faith, and her take on faith and buffy, how they were made to fit together. also glad to get the explanation that willow's magic interfered with the spell, cause now we can't take anything from S4 tempus fugit for granted.



muchly looking forward to seeing our girls again! especially since I was somewhat confused about where we left them in the last update...it sort of seemed, from willow's inner monologue, that she had phased out a few times already; she said something about feeling the magic pulling, and this being where she usually "lost her." I was a little confused, I admit. but I'm assuming all will be clear when next we find our enchantigly splendiferous heroines...



--jenny

WILLOW: Why is it always the end of the world? Couldn't it be the end of cheese or something?

--Tempus Fugit(S7) by Lipkandy



"They don't have legs...creepy eyes...and who the hell knows how they breathe. Doesn't make sense." --my girl defending her fish-fear

Buffy and her mom were really touching.

Anya made me laugh a few times.

This story is getting better and better!

And it's ok, that this part was T/W-less, cause reading about buffy and her mother and Dawn/Faith was pretty interesting too.

Awesome update!

snuggle79 and just for you once more

__________________

"I got so lost"

"I found you, i will always find you"

Edited by: snuggle79 at: 12/11/02 9:43:13 am

Wow, great update. Question is will Faith be able to handle everything...

And Buffy's mom , such a sweet scene.

BV

"In front of total strangers won't you kiss me, Flowers for no reason but you miss me - OOH, I wanna be in love"

Melissa Etheridge-Skin

Still wondering if S6Buffy will walk into S4Buffy. Now that would be kinda difficult to explain. S6Buffy could hint her mother to have some *cough*random*cough* medical exams done... just to make sure she's still healthy of course



Yes, I like to cheat



Grimmy

"You hurt Tara," Willow said too calmly. "The last one who tried that was a god. I made her regret it." -- Unexpected Consequences by Lisa of Nine

I loved the advice from Faith to Dawn... on making a kill before 18.



Did Faith also add PMS as her defence as well as being a juvenile... I'm sure that would have guaranteed an early release



I don't envy Buffy now. She is back in a time before Dawn, (as opposed to a 'before the Dawn of time'.. time. ) a choice between Mom or Dawn, can't be easy for her,



Can't wait for the next update.

I love this update. Unlike most, I like Dawn and really appreciate your focus on her. She's seen so much horror and lost so much. I can only imagine her fear and desperation at losing her sister, and her remaining surrogate mother. Also loved when Faith held her hand and Anya hugged her. Reassuring to know that they love her and will be there regardless.

Quote:

---

"Oh, that." The vengeance demon continued obviously disappointed that her explanation of demon sexuality was cut short. "Well, Occum supposedly made it after his or her lover was killed as a kind of second chance. A way to go back in time and do it over. Get her back." Her forehead was lined in concentration. "But it’s really way more complicated than that and if you weren’t rushing me and interrupting every two sec…."

---

Will Buffy have a second chance to get her mom back? Could it even be possible to catch and treat the tumor? Wow!



And what can Willow possibly do to change her tragic future?

--------------


Three Friends. Two Million Dollars. One Opportunity.

okay,

I stopped by to check for updates on a few of my fav fics and noticed that there was actually some feedback on this. I'm sorry for the lack of updates here, I've had serious writer's block. I blame the holidays or maybe that fat guy in the red suit.

anyway, there will be updates soon I just have to find that slippery muse again.

but a belated feedback response is probably in order so here goes:



marilda [blush] thanks [/blush]



antigone hey mary. yeah, I think this may be why this fic is getting so difficult for me to write. even though I have it all mapped out, I have a hard time writing these grief-filled scenes. especially W/T. so maybe it's not the fat guy in the red suit after all although I'm sure Anya is right and he's a demon... and I see you have a new fic on the boards. guess I have something new to read thank you very much



ruby thank you as usual. I live for your feedback.



mollyig it's strange, I thought dawn/faith would be the most difficult, but so far it has been a dream. guess it's my comic relief. and I love anya and think she was terribly underused, kinda like tara. and buffy...hmmm...she's such a dilemna because I've grown to really dislike her character, so I'm trying to return her to the feminist superhero she was meant to be. we'll see if it works



jewwitch I grin every time I see your sig in the thread. you give such great feedback. yeah, again with the underused characters and I'm beginning to realize that dawn is one of them. the more I write her the more I realize that there was an opportunity there that they trashed. trying to turn her into a saccharin buffy junior was not a good choice. she should be a rebellious, independent, bratty teen. and I didn't realize I left a cliffhanger in there. sorry about that. this Willow's a little too powerful to let a little old demon spell jerk her around.



snuggle thanks as usual! you rock! I'm so glad you're still reading. have I mentioned lately what a feedback ho I've become?



barnabasvamp will faith be able to hand it? she is a very strong and resourceful chick...with her own agenda of course...



grimlock hey grimmy. nope S4 buffy will not be running into S7 buff. they're returning into their old bodies, which makes things even more confusing probably, but that's what I'm here for.



serafinna we all need an evil influence when we're a teenager. not to mention a self-righteous Slayer's little sis. but to my mind Faith really cares she just has her own faith-ish way of showing it.



noho thanks! and I'm beginning to like Dawn more and more as I write her. hmmm, will buffy get her mom back? well, these spells have a way of making things more complicated rather than less...which probably doesn't help at all



phew!! the next update will probably be sometime next week. I have to go to Mississippi (don't ask). When will the holidays end? grumble, grumble....



and for those of you who are interested, the companion piece to this (that sounded awfully masterpiece theater) has been moved to the completed fic archives. you can find it

here

hey there xomel!! it was so good to see a post from you, even if it wasn't an update-- I was gettin a little worried about you, sweetie! but, writer's block, understandable. maybe you will find your slippery muse in mississippi? (and it's always the last place you look...) reminds me of the first time I took a creative writing seminar in high school, and had to actually sit down and tell myself to write a poem because it was assigned. total panic!! I was like, "whoa, can't tell the muse what to do! she comes when she damn well wants to!" ...of course, I got over that. it helped (me, anyway) to compare my muse to the goodness of orgasms (and no, I am not channeling anya). if I just sat around and "waited" for orgasms to visit me, well...I would be a very unhappy person, not to mention tense! of course, you can't command an orgasm to appear, nor can you command the muse. but the invitation always helps



--jenny

Say you really like shrimp. Or, say you don't like shrimp at all. "Bah, I wish there weren't any shrimp," you'd say...

--Anya

Just catching up now with this last chapter, and I just wanted to say something in response to your comment to me last time about wanting to re-write, subtly, the entire magic=addiction concept in season 6. Post-season 5 IS really hard to write, I think; there were so many little ways that the show seemed to lose its way, and writing credible, believable ways out of that mess is really hard.



But here's the thing: you're doing it so beautifully. I like this idea that no one in the vengeance business is allowed to interfere in any way with Willow Rosenberg. Whether that's due to her magickal power, or her past actions, or simply the heavy weight of her desire to have Tara back, the truth is that she is a force to be reckoned with, addiction or not. I kind of think that she is MORE a force to be reckoned with when she's NOT addicted to magic because then her choices are somehow more chosen. I definitely wonder what D'Hoffryn has in mind here, but for me, the very acknowledgment of Willow's force-ness is huge. We all know she's an emotional force as well as a magical force.



The interactions among these other characters work so well, and I look forward to seeing more W/T. I love this story.

"And I'm eating this banana. Lunchtime be damned!" -- Willow in "Doppelgangland

sorry for the delay in updates, but my writer's block has turned into an all-out paralysis. I did manage a few pages, but first some more feedback:

jewwitch hey jenny. no, I didn't find my muse in Mississippi (shock of shocks) but you have stumbled into one of my bandmates and friends (not that the two are mutually exclusive or anything) favorite passtimes: making me blush with the spicy talk. hmmm, I don't know if this update qualifies as an orgasm or not, but it was definitely a monumental effort and usually writing w/t is a pleasure.

tulipp [img]http://www.ezboard.com/intl/aenglish/images/emoticons/smile.gif] yes, I'm beginning to think it's the quagmire of S6 that's tying me in knots. so many character twists that were just ...wrong. and I remember reading a spoiler somewhere way back in S5 that said that the Scoobies were going to learn what Willow really was and the implication was that she was something uniquely powerful. and it felt so right especially in the old buffyverse, that faithful, harmless-looking Willow would turn out to be a Chosen One (of some sort) herself. but of course, ME missed the boat as usual... so I thought I'd take up the cause. and I always look for your feedback as well because your stories are just beautiful.

Part IX
It felt like it had taken hours to navigate the Quad and the dorm hallways to reach Tara’s room. A long journey of fumbling kisses and stares full of longing that had finally brought them here. Where they belonged. Where it had all started. Willow smiled and felt a contented sigh escape her as she took in the familiar dorm room. The dark walls and tiny lights, the wonderful smells of tea and jasmine and Tara. She closed her eyes and let it transport her to another time. Before. When everything between them was awkward and true. Their first clumsy kiss and ‘I-love-you’s that weren’t anymore. She had rewritten that. They had rewritten it together. The kiss. But still no ‘I love you’. She would have to correct that…

All thought left her mind as Tara’s mouth descended on her own in a clumsy but demanding kiss. Willow smiled into the difference of it. The newness of this mouth that should have been so familiar.

[/img]And where the hell did she learn to do… she gasped again. That?!? We didn’t do that until…

She slid down the door as the wet heat of Tara’s mouth moved against the fabric between her legs. And then caught herself. Risking another glance at the bed she had just decided to move to the floor when something caught her eye. Something familiar and completely unexpected. A woodcut of the device that had started everything. She froze immediately. It was a déjà vu, but more than that because she knew that somehow this had all happened before, like a memory just out of reach, a word unspoken on the tip of her tongue. A memory of this room. This Tara.

The Tara from this time who believed that the redhead was the same shy hacker geek and sidekick to the Slayer. The Willow who belonged here in this now. That girl who was not a liar. Not a murderer or a power-addicted witch. Yet. She felt the guilt and shame crushing down on her in terrible waves. She was lying to Tara again and it had to stop.

How many times can I fail you…

Now. She had to tell her now even if it ruined everything. Even though it would take every ounce of her strength because the heat between her legs was undeniable…

"Tara," she gently pulled the blonde’s face up to meet her own. "I need to tell you …" she smiled, gasping for air, "we need to talk….about earlier." Willow leaned in to place a gentle kiss on the blonde’s lips, but was surprised to feel her pull away.

"Oh! S-sorry….I know…I mean, I know it was j-just…" Willow watched as the blonde backed away, her shoulders hunching in shame as her eyes again found the floor.

You idiot! Be careful what you say here. You went from shy, geeky hetero friend to lesbian sex fiend in a matter of hours and she has no idea…

"No, no, no! No!" She took the blonde’s hands in her own and bent to find blue eyes. "That’s not the kind of talk I mean."

The blonde backed away again and looked at the floor, her hair hiding her eyes again. "It’s okay…Willow I mean, I kn-know there’s…Oz,"

"No! No Oz." Willow shook her head emphatically. "This is so not about him." She took a deep breath as her eyes wandered over the room’s contents landing finally on the open texts. That talk would have to wait. There was something more important that needed to be said. Corrected. Because she had said it before…then. In that other past the ‘I love you’s had come first before even a kiss and she knew that Tara needed to hear it desperately. So she brought her hands up to cup the blonde’s face, gently bringing her face up to her own. "Okay, I thought there was only one talk that needed to happen, but apparently there are two because I’ve been so busy with…um, other things that I…so…" the redhead couldn’t help but smile at her own nervous rambling. Like I’m channeling Old Willow. "So this officially begins the talk where I tell you that I’m absolutely, totally in love with you Tara Maclay."

Blue eyes finally met her own, brimming with tears and Willow released a breath she didn’t realize she had been holding. "Really?" The blonde’s hesitant question brought an enormous smile to the redhead’s lips. All of this doubt and uncertainty that Tara had somehow managed to overcome. She found herself wondering exactly when that transition had happened. Was it after they turned her father away or had it been a subtle change over weeks and months. A slow, comfortable slide into the confident woman Tara would become. And she loved them both – the shy, sweet girl of the past who stood before her and the strong, take-charge woman she had lost. She would always love them both.

"Really." She whispered against Tara’s lips. "Love you. Always have. Always will." She kissed her lightly and pulled back to study the changing lines of Tara’s face as she finally allowed herself to believe. "And want you too," she kissed her again feeling the blonde’s lips turn up in a smile against her own. "Gods, like every second," another lingering kiss. "So don’t ever…" Tara sighed against her lips, "worry…’cause Tara kisses… always good."

Willow felt the cement set of her shoulders soften as Tara deepened the kiss, her cool fingers exploring her neck, smoothing away the tension. Her lips pulled away gently and Willow forced her eyes open to find a shy smile on the blonde’s face.

"I love you so much Willow," blue eyes moved over her face, the blonde’s smile fading slightly as her eyes became unfocused. Willow took a deep breath to steady herself knowing Tara was reading her again. She felt it this time. Felt the blonde’s energy like a warm breeze blowing around her. Through her.

"What do you see Tara?"

The blond witch jumped slightly, startled out of her thoughts. "N-nothing."

Willow took her hands in her own and squeezed them slightly. "It’s okay. You can tell me," she began gently and waved at the air around her. "This…is kind of the other thing I wanted to talk to you about."

"Oh…I…" the blonde began and faltered, a deep line forming between her eyebrows as she studied the space around them. There was a long silence and she willed herself to stay silent. To give Tara the room she needed to say what had to be said. "It’s just…your aura…" the blonde trailed off and looked left before smiling slightly. "Y-your aura was the first thing I noticed about you. So beautiful." Tara’s smile brightened as she reached out to touch red hair tentatively. "Like a halo of sunshine, with these veins of white and g-green running through it," Tara’s face scrunched in concentration as she struggled to articulate the indescribable. "Kind of like this explosion of liquid, fiery marble." Blue eyes returned to meet her own for a moment and the smile faded.

"But?" Willow prodded gently.

"Did something h-happen to you?"

Willow just nodded and waited. That was so like Tara. She had obviously seen something terrible in her aura. Something dark, but her only concern was for Willow. She steeled herself for what was coming. Was this the moment then when it ended? When the spell was broken?

"B-because…" the blonde touched her face gently, "now there are v-veins of…darkness," she frowned in concentration, "every-w-where…and…" she trailed off, her mouth snapping shut as if she was afraid to say more.

"I know." She placed her hand over Tara’s where the fingers rested lightly on her cheek. "But you don’t have to worry, I’d never hurt you."

Tara’s face twisted with confusion as she looked deeply into green eyes and cupped the redhead’s face in both hands. "I’m not worried for me Willow. I’m worried for you."

She felt the tightening in her throat, the burning in her eyes as the tears began to cloud her vision. But the grief would have to wait. There was too much that needed to be said before it was all taken away. Because it would be eventually. It always was.

She looked deep into blue and began. "Tar-" but her voice broke again around that word. Inhaling deeply, she averted her eyes and found them returning to the open text on the bed. The device. She turned and pulled Tara with her to stand over the illustration. "How…I mean, why are you researching this?"

Tara looked at the open book before turning again to search her eyes and Willow could see the confusion there. The concern. But there was something else overpowering everything. The blonde would wait for her to find her way to the explanation because she trusted her. With everything. Willow fought back another sob and pushed herself back to the present.

"I don’t know. I was re…s-searching something and it just seemed so familiar and s-sad," she rolled her eyes, an embarrassed smile twisting across her features. "I know it’s s-silly…"

"No it’s not ‘cause that’s why I’m here," she felt her forehead furrowing at the implications of this ‘coincidence’. Tara’s hunches were never to be taken lightly and there was her own overwhelming sense of déjà vu. "I mean, literally, that’s why I’m here, but I don’t know much about it." She squinted at the small text under the woodcut, but could only make out the words ‘Occum’s Heart -- mythical demon device.’

Guess it’s not so mythical she thought with a rueful smile. She scanned the other books strewn across the comforter and found that they were all familiar texts on demons.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean I’m not this Willow…" she trailed off as the blonde’s face twisted with confusion and concern. Be careful. Be careful what you say. You could lose her again so easily… "I know it sounds insane or like a really bad movie, but Buffy and I are here from the future." Willow looked down at the illustration and continued, "it was this…device. There were two words on the back." She shrugged. "Buffy said them by mistake and now we’re stuck here. I’m sorry I should have told you before…" she trailed off, squeezing Tara’s hand sure that it was the last time she would be able to touch the blonde. She had betrayed her. Made love to her under false pretenses. She wasn’t this Willow.

"So you’re both back in time in your old bodies?" Which wasn’t what she was expecting at all so she nodded quietly and waited. "Where’s the H-heart?"

Willow smiled as she studied the blonde’s look of deep concentration. "I’m thinking it’s probably still in the future, that it just triggered the spell. But I have no idea what the spell does…except for the obvious."

"So that’s why all the d-darkness then," the blonde’s brow was still furrowed in concentration. "because it’s a demon spell."

And it would have been so easy to agree. To lie. But she wasn’t going to be that girl again. "No," her eyes dropped immediately to the floor in shame and she felt her fingers grow colder in Tara’s hot grip. "Tara, I can’t tell you everything, but…" she swallowed past a lump in her throat and took a deep breath to steady herself. "Terrible things happened…are going to happen," the blonde nodded her understanding and she forced herself to go on. "And I do terrible things. Really awful things Tara," a tear slipped down her cheek. "Evil, unforgivable things,’ she finished quietly.

There was another long silence as the two of them stood holding hands.

"W-was it me?" Her head immediately snapped up to face the blonde. "I mean, because if I hurt anyone…" she was nearly hysterical, desperate as her eyes roamed over the redhead’s face. "you need to tell me so I w-won’t…."

Willow stood staring at her trying to understand the sudden turn. She had been expecting anger and hurt at her painful admission, but this…

She studied the blonde’s features, the fear and desperation that were growing with every moment and it all fell into place with a nearly audible click. The texts, the terrible future she had described. This Tara still believed she was a demon, believed that she would inevitably bring pain and suffering to anyone who loved her.

"No! It was all me. Completely me and that’s…" she paused momentarily unsure of how much to give away. Would it change things? You’ve already changed everything! "You’re not a demon Tara," she finally said forcefully, holding blue eyes steady with her own. Blue eyes clouded with doubt.

"No Willow, you don’t understand I…" Tara began, shaking her head violently.

"You’re not," she interrupted softly. "It was all a lie. Your father told you that to control you. To keep you from becoming more powerful than him."

"No, that’s not p-possible. I mean, how do you…"

She smoothed golden hair behind one ear and held her face with one shaky hand. "There’s a kind of a demon test…’ she began and then realized she was going to have to go into detail about Spike and changed direction. "I, uh, can’t tell you how I know, but I do know this." She brought another hand up to cup the blonde’s face. "Tara, you are the purest soul I’ve ever met. Believe me, there’s no demon in you… anywhere.

"So I’m not?"

Tears clouded her vision as she watched Tara struggle with the weight of it all. The terrible knowledge that the man she trusted and feared most, the man who should have protected her was a liar. Had made her hate herself and fear the future.

"No, baby," she murmured gently stroking Tara’s hair, loving the silk of it pouring through her fingers and then pulled her into her arms. "Absolutely no demon in there anywhere. Just beautiful, brilliant, wonderful Tara." The scent of jasmine and sandalwood washed over her as she nuzzled into golden hair and fell into the all of Tara.

And suddenly it was there in the room with them. Magic. Deep and dark and powerful tearing at the fabric of reality with a searing cold.

No!

Not yet.

She reached down into herself again to stop it. The magic. But it was deeper this time and stronger and she thought she felt something familiar in it. Something that seemed to speak her name in that other language that told time in millennia. And then the black.

***

"So if it’s just some big dumb demon looking for his heart what’s with all the ‘end of the world’ stuff?"

Dawn studied the darkened features of the Slayer who walked briskly beside her, an enormous axe and broadsword resting on one shoulder. Faith had grown silent as they walked away from the Magic Box, her eyes rapidly scanning the growing dark.

"I mean, it doesn’t sound so apocalyptic to me," she continued hoping for a response, but Faith just shrugged.

"Probably just Cordelia being a Drama Queen as usual," the Slayer finally offered without breaking stride and shifted the weapons from one shoulder to another.

Her memories of Cordelia were dim and vague evoking a strange mixture of terror and awe. And oddly, images of very short skirts. She looked up to find that they were entering the cemetery and stopped.

Faith turned immediately to face her. "What?"

"This is the cemetery."

"Yeah?"

"And it’s dark."

"Yeah, it kind of does that at night," Faith offered glibly and Dawn rolled her eyes. She had definitely walked right into that one.

"Why are we here?"

The Slayer scowled and brought the weapons off her shoulder to rest on the ground in one graceful motion.

"Is this a trick question? ‘Cause I thought, you know, you being Buffy’s little sis that you would know the drill." Dawn stood speechless. Was it possible that Faith was going to take her with her on Patrol again? "See, me Slayer," Faith pounded a fist against her chest in her best Cave-Slayer imitation and Dawn again rolled her eyes, "they…uh, are vampires." She flipped the broadsword once effortlessly and handed the teenager the hilt before motioning dramatically toward the arched stone gateway. "And we slay."

She said ‘we,’ Dawn thought with growing excitement and rolled the leather grip of the sword in her hands. But Buffy would kill her. No, Buffy would kill Faith and then never let her leave the house again. That was what had almost happened the last time. Except for the Faith-murdering part. But this Buffy would definitely kill Faith and probably send her to some convent school in the Swiss Alps or something.

But Buffy isn’t here…and the world’s gonna end anyway so who cares.

"So what’s the plan? Am I like your backup? Shouldn’t I have a stake?"

Faith shook her head and hefted the axe onto her shoulder again. "Too easy to miss with a stake and that’ll just piss them off. Just stay out of the way. But if one of them gets by me, start swinging."

Dawn nodded wildly, too excited by the prospect of actually getting to go on Patrol to admit that she didn’t have any idea how to use a sword.

"So I have to cut their heads off…"she began but stopped as the Slayer turned and began walking in long very un-Buffy strides toward the cemetery.

"Forget about that. Hack off an arm or a leg and they’ll probably leave you alone long enough for me to dust ‘em," she said over her shoulder and Dawn struggled after her. She could hear the smile in Faith’s voice, could almost feel her excitement. Buffy acted like she was going off to clean toilets when she went on Patrol, but Faith obviously loved it. Everything about it. And who wouldn’t, Dawn thought shaking her head, testing the weight of the sword in her hands. This was so freakin’ cool!

They walked purposefully through the labyrinth of dimly lit paths finally stopping at a fresh grave.

"Now what?" Dawn whispered loudly and watched a predatory smile cross the dark Slayer’s face as she studied the grave and the cemetery around them.

"Now we wait for the fun to start."

"Fun," Dawn murmured with a smile and stared at the loose dirt covering the grave in front of them. "But shouldn’t we be at home, you know, in case this Vra’al guy shows up for his heart or whatever?"

Faith scowled and seemed to consider her question briefly, "Someone’s gotta slay and if the VD’s right, Red can handle anything," she looked to her left suddenly before continuing obviously distracted. "And I’m thinking I don’t want to be around if she does." Faith smiled wistfully, "She never liked me much."

"Oh yeah," Dawn shifted the leather grip in her now-sweaty grip. If Willow really had gone all dark magic-y again, she didn’t want to be around her either. Or even on the same continent. "So do you think…" she began but was cut off by a quick signal from Faith, her hand palm-down in the familiar gesture for silence that Buffy used when she was was being bossy Colonel Buffy.

She turned the sword grip in her hands again as Faith stepped between her and the dark woods behind them. "Here kitty kitty." Silence. "Don’t make me come get you," she continued in a disturbing parody of an angry parent and Dawn understood with a chill that Faith sensed a vampire out there somewhere.

"No worries Slayer, just came to talk to Little Bit." A familiar figure emerged from the darkness clad in a long black coat with peroxided hair, his hands held palm up in surrender. Dawn felt the sword slip from her grip and fall to the ground with a dull thud as a violent mix of emotions ran through her. Her first impulse was to run to him. He would help them. And he probably knew things. It was a demon thing after all. And he had always protected her. But then she remembered Buffy broken and bruised and the terrible conversation she wasn’t supposed to hear.

"Go away Spike," she growled and stepped up to stand even with Faith, surprised at the angry tone of her own voice.

The vampire actually looked surprised. And hurt. He stared for a few moments and then tried again, his voice soft and gentle, "Look, I know I…"

"You tried to rape my sister!" She didn’t say it. She would never have said it. It was torn out of her in one violent spasm of grief and anger that hit Spike like a physical blow. He staggered back slightly and his mouth closed around whatever he had come to say.

"What?"

Faith. The hair on the back of her neck stood on end as she turned to the Dark Slayer and saw the flash of fury in those dark eyes. This was the Faith they all feared. She understood it now. The dark and the power and the terrible wounded thing at the base of it all. And she knew without any doubt that she was looking into the face of death.

Oh god!

"Faith, no…" but it was too late. The Slayer moved like a shadow, faster than Buffy, faster than anything she had ever seen. A rush of motion that swept Spike up effortlessly in a screaming tornado of anger and pinned him against an enormous tree. She saw the stake pull back in a long arc and pause for what seemed like an hour, but must have only been a fraction of a second. "No!" And then the blur and hiss of it as the Slayer brought it home.

TBC




Edited by: lipkandy at: 1/13/03 8:02:54 pm