I usually give feedback in PMs until I'm caught up. But since Ariel said she'd post sooner if I put this in the thread, here goes!
Chapter 13:
- “Absolutely! Willow and Tara Cabin-ification continues!”
- OK, this new girl's got entitlement problems above and beyond. Awesome action scene with the Faith/Tara save there!
- And still more 'tude from mystery girl. Grrr.
- She's Cordelia's cousin! Explains so much. Oh dear lord, as Giles would say if he were here.
Chapter 14:
- Woot! Finch actually stood up for Tara! I was totally expecting her to let Ronnie run roughshod over the place because her folks are big financial supporters of the camp or something.
- Probably a good call on Willow's part to not turn her back there.
- "Rosenberg’s Emporium of Ear Tickling" Ha! Love it!
“Yes I s-still want to. C-can’t you see inside my heart?” Her blue eyes shone in a way that Willow knew was just for her
Dawww!
- I love Tara and Faith's different reactions to suddenly being thrust into the spotlight! Beautifully captures both characters and their responses to stress.
- “We could stop the smoochies and keep the snuggles.”…“Maybe we can’t, actually.”
- Always love Tara singing!
Sounds like a fun song, too!
- Frog fears
- Now that's my kind of baptism!
Chapter 15:
- Bladders: the bane of snuggles
- Worked out for the best, tho:
“Was th-that a nightmare or was M-Mrs. Finch actually in here with a flashlight?”
“Answer C: All of the above,” Willow said slowly.
- Veronica Chase: Worst. Alarm clock. Ever.
- Beautifully handled by Tara, tho!
- Faith's Autograph!
Honestly, I'd probably be OK with that if I hadn't yet got syrup on them.
- Gah! The meeting/accusation/firing bit! Too much with the Feels to get into more detail but
I've never been much of one for revenge or anything, always just want to be left alone, but Cordy/Ronnie/Finchie are pushing me over the line here
- This bit, tho:
Tara began shaking, “b-but h-h-how d-d-did—“ Jules put her hand gently on Tara’s shoulder, “I’ve seen that look before Tara.” She saw the pain and confusion lingering in the younger girl’s eyes. “In the mirror,” she said softly, “I’ve seen that look in the mirror.” She gave Tara the fierce and tender hug of one survivor to another; and then she let her go.
Yeah, when you've been there, you recognize it in others. I realized years ago that there was a reason I kept clicking and becoming friends with other people who had been through some rough times.
Tara saw the eyes that she loved, glittering green like an ocean made of tears.
Willow saw the eyes that she loved, burning blue with hurt like the center of a flame.
- And then even more:
Suddenly their eyes locked and they breathed in at the same time. Then Willow’s right hand rose as if to press against the pane of glass, the gesture mirrored by Tara’s left hand so that both hands met, palm to palm. All their yearning, all their love was focused there, with hands and fingers pressed flat against each other. A long moment passed. Then fingers meshed, binding hands and hearts together again and more deeply than they had ever been.
Chapter 16:
- Ooh, looking forward to seeing what Faith & Carly have cooked up (pun intended
)
- Nice to see Veronica wanting to get in on the friend-ness. Perhaps she isn't irredeemable?
- Actually, that's really starting to remind me of why Cordelia (eventually) works on the show: She'd never actually had real friends before, and hanging with the Scoobies really did transform her and help her grow up. Here's hoping Veronica can get a bit of a head start on that!
- "We hold."
- Oh, Cordelia, such a talent for saying the wrong thing at the
wrong time you've got there. Yeah, you just completely earned this
- And they managed to catch Finchel with it, too!
- Someone mentioned in the comments that they thought it was overly gross, but honestly, I'd rather see gross than violent.
Chapter 17:
- Dawww! Tara is so amazing with Ronnie! I'm pretty patient with kids, but I got nothing on Tare-Bear here
- I love how zealous Faith is about being their lookout
- This site needs more negative smilies. There's nothing to do proper justice to that downcast => triumphant arc when they fall in the horse muck, putting the kibosh on cuddles, and then suddenly realize "Showers!" at the same time!
- The fact that Willow's mind went first to trying to work out just how improbable that was is extra-adorable, tho
- Gah! Shower, interrupted!
- And then (dis)Harmony! And there isn't even the possibility of vampirism to improve her personality here
- Glad they were able to end the softball practice on a high note!
Chapter 17.2:
- Gah, bleach and ammonia! My sister nearly killed us both that way one time when we were working in the dishroom together in college. Fortunately it's heavier than air and the lead was quick enough to flush the stuff down the disposal before anyone got hurt.
- Awww, poor Veronica! I know she's been mean, but she seems so sad and alone now.
- Gah! Cliffhanger! Glad I'm not reading in "real time" at this point
I was about to go to bed, but I reckon it's "just one more chapter" time
Chapter 18:
- Grrr Finchel, with her being all reasonable and stuff on the surface. Always so frustrating when the person at fault is the one who comes across as reasonable, in blatant contradiction of the actual facts
“I can’t believe it! I, Willow Rosenberg, honor student, teacher’s pet and faculty favorite actually mouthed off to an authority figure!” She grinned, “And I liked it!”
- Hands! In places! Cold hands in places! Aaaaaah!
- As a general note, again, I love how much of this dialogue I can totally hear in Alyson Hannigan's voice. Sometimes with Tara's too, but I haven't seen as much stuff with Amber Benson as with Hannigan, so that doesn't come as easily for me.
- Dawwww!
- Great use of a "teachable moment" with the name-calling there! And I love that Ronnie didn't kick Mouse out of bed this time!
- OK, actually bed time now!
Next round: Took out the extra spaces after I saw how much room that last post took up. These get kind of huge when I'm doing a bunch of chapters at once. Let me know if I'm clogging up the thread too much and I'll go back to PMing them to Ariel until I get caught up.
Chapter 19:
- “I mean my uh colleagues.”
- Gah! She wasn't joking about the Prune Juice! I must admit, when I worked at Safeway, I was rather surprised at how much of that stuff we sold. It's definitely still a thing
- Yay, Carly! Vive le Resistance!
- Who knew cooling down could be so hot?
- And such a sweet (pun intended) return with the berries
- "Silly Day"? This already has me nervous
- And then Cordelia just goes and reinforces it...
- "Bitch" isn't a word I like to use, but I can't think of anything else that fits Cordelia right now
- Love the kids banding together to help, tho!
My favorite was
Connie chipped in, “Steal her make-up. She’d die but they wouldn’t call it murder.”
- Going through the other comments, tho, I can totally see Tara being too ashamed and embarrassed to show the shirt to Finchel*, especially given how little sympathy she's generally received there.
* Picked that up as a swearword from a friend who ships Faberry in Glee, and couldn't resist using it here.
Chapter 20:
- Dee Hoffryn! Nicely done!
-
Really curious about what Devola's got there
- Being a bit spacy today, at first I confused "Macready" with "Maclay" and thought things were about to get really horrible! So glad I was just mixed up there! Carly's dad seems like a nice guy, could use more of those around.
- An accident with her mandolin, Accident...yeaaaah, sure, Donnie
- Hooray Tie-Die!
Chapter 21:
- Yay Willow standing up for not only herself and Tara, but Veronica, too!
- Prune Juice 2: Barely avoided!
- And again, always love Tara singing! Beautiful song choices, too!
- Yes! Finally get to hear what Devola was up to! And Faith helping!
- And Veronica at least not causing problems, even if she's not really on board yet
- Private Lessons!
Chapter 22:
- Private Lessons, Part 1: Now that's some positive reinforcement!
- OK, I kind of just got lost in that one. As I said to True_Love once, anyone who can give detailed feedback on
that is a stronger person than I
- Ends on one of my all-time favorite lines, too
Chapter 23:
- Great Willow-babble there again!
- "Tara smiled and indicated her breasts, “I don’t think that they can talk.” She met Willow’s eyes, “But I’m available for lunch.” "
- More with the Grrr at Cordelia. You just don't
do that sort of thing with little kids!
- Hooray! I'm not the only person to come up with "Tare Bear!"
- Always happy to see Mouse & Veronica growing closer!
- Hah! Some seriously differing priorities there!
Chapter 24:
- I'm not a fan of all things southern (It's way too hot down there for my taste, to start), but they do have some wonderful turns of phrase. “Recollect me to your friend, if you’ve a mind to.” I'm gonna have to try to remember to use that one next time I get a chance.
- Go Tara! Way to put Harm in her place!
- Devola has excellent taste in Claymation! She's awesome in this whole scene, actually
- "Milk & Honey" open up so many wonderful possibilities for sneaky dirty references! Well chosen
- "Tara stared up; Willow was a creature of dappled moonlight and mysterious shadow who approached silently. " "Beautiful" doesn't cover the half of what I want to say about that sentence, but I reckon it'll have to do
Chapter 25:
- Milk & Honey: A vitamin-packed part of this complete breakfast!
- Willow in the shower and her thoughts and I just don't have words here
- Ohhhhhh! Poor Willow! Love her babble here, tho, especially the "terrible deficiency of tallness"
- And of course, a healthy dose of
is needed for Cordelia here. She just can't resist piling it on, can she?
Chapter 26:
- Too often, when the topic of how people smell is brought up, it's either entirely negative, or all about perfumes instead of the actual scent of the person. I love when someone mentions that it's entirely possible for people to smell good, just as themselves
- Sorry, getting sleepy here, and so less coherent, but much with the "grrr" and the
and the
for Cordelia here. Again, you just don't do that sort of thing with kids!
- Guh, getting to the point my stomach just about drops out when Finchel shows up. Even when it's good, it's bad, and when it's bad...
- Tara doing Phantom was lovely, and very cute with the kids joining in!
And now it's off to bed for me! Going to be slowing down a bit as the week starts up again, but I hope to be all caught up by the time the new Chapter posts
Edited for typos I didn't see until it posted.
by KirbyPaint » Sat Jul 21, 2012 4:34 pm 
