I have to agree with Xita and Bob. The only person who can definitively answer this question is Willow herself and she has made it very clear that she is gay. To question that is to question whether Willow truly knows her own mind.
by Roxton » Sun May 27, 2001 9:09 am
by kpmuse » Sun May 27, 2001 9:27 am
The fact that Willow said she would take care of Tara, even if she never gets better shows me the depth of her feelings. This is not a crush, experimentation or infatuation. These are two girls in serious love.
It seems to me that Willow's comment to Xander about 10th grade was one of those "witty between friend comments" you say when opportunity knocks. I took it as a humor moment between two long term friends who have a history together.
I agree that Joss is now making it clear that Willow is gay and that she is not just experimenting with her sexuality. Tough Love, The Gift and Spiral totally proved that to me. Willow came out with a clear declaration about her feelings for Tara. They are now very clearly and visually a romantic couple. In fact, the most romantic couple on the show in my opinion. The ambiguity is gone.
And the bottom line is....since they are girls in love -- where I come from, that is gay! Woo Hoo!
by Kalita » Sun May 27, 2001 9:28 am
"I just know she likes Willow; and she already has one of those."
Xander, "Family"
Kal
by Hugin » Sun May 27, 2001 9:34 am
quote:
Originally posted by Lijdrec:
Willow is quite obviously a bi-sexual character, but very much in love with Tara (Gay now!). Love is the operative word here not her sexuality. But Willow ........
Mmm, well, except no. That is to say, if Willow verbally self identifies as gay...I'm not sure there's much use in trying to insist on someone's sexuality from the outside. I have friends who claim to be gay, though they've never actually formed a relationship with someone of the same gender. But they're my friends, and so I respect their own take on themselves. I figure, unless they're very, very messed up, and in a ridiculous level of denial, they probably have more say in what they are than I do.
So, on a certain level, I don't think it's very fair to Willow (and to the writers of Willow) to say "Well, sorry, I deem Willow to be bi, your feelings in the matter don't count. No, she can't notice a guy is cute, that makes her bi. (For example, Buffy has noticed Willow is cute...I really don't think Buffy is supposed to be bi on the show) And Oz is going to count for the rest of your life. He's a guy, you were with him, no gayness for you."
Willow says she's gay. She's said it three or four different times now. I don't think she's ever said she's bi.
At some point, especially as she continues to be involved sexually and emotionally with Tara, I have to take her at her word.
quote:
....still a sweet spot in her heart for Xander.
Does Willow have feelings of fondness/ruefulness/irony that her old high school crush and friend finally, (and several years too late), "gets" that smart is sexy? Sure.
But keep in mind, they recently devoted most of an episode (Triangle) to laying the idea of Willow still having any romantic feelings for Xander to rest.
-len
by Him » Sun May 27, 2001 9:52 am
I am so pissed that I missed that. I must have got home from school, ran to the TV, turned it on, and just missed that. AHHHH!!!
About my thoughts on what Willow's sexuality is, I'm basing it on what the writers went out of their way to show us. I WANT TO SEE THAT FIGHT SCENE AHHH!!! ...I'm back. Anyway, it seems they may be leaving that bi door open just in case Amber gets a movie career and leaves the show, who knows? Gay or Bi, she's still the best. w00t!
by hopey » Sun May 27, 2001 11:01 am
by Zahir » Sun May 27, 2001 1:46 pm
------------------
"O let my name be in the Book of Love.
If it be there, I care not of
That other book Above...
Strike it out! Or write it in anew.
But let it be in the Book of Love!"
--Omar Kyam
by Cici » Sun May 27, 2001 3:04 pm
-Cici
by geekgod » Sun May 27, 2001 3:34 pm
Willow is obviously the only person who could answer this question, and 'Tough Love' made it pretty clear that she does understand herself and her feelings. I also believe that the only reason she was attracted to Dracula was because of his dark-come-to-me-mojo.
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willow: "i don't get wild, wild on me equals 'spaz'"
"That's my girl"
by knike74 » Sun May 27, 2001 3:38 pm
by RomanceJunky » Sun May 27, 2001 5:00 pm
The Junky...I prefer the term 'Romantasexual' myself!!!
------------------
"I am, You know."
"What?"
"Yours."
by Gadget » Sun May 27, 2001 5:30 pm
by Dazey » Mon May 28, 2001 12:18 am
Now admittedly, people are a lot more complex than food. Nonetheless, this holds true for us...how on earth could we talk about ourselves if we didn't use labels? As an example, Bob would likely describe himself as a racing enthusiast. That's a label. If labels didn't exist, we'd probably be wondering why the hell there are pictures of race cars in the daily thread. I'm a bass guitar player, that's another label, and one that came in very handy when I was looking to join a band...I know I'm stretching a bit here but do you see my point?
The problem is not labels. The problem is the prejudices that arise from these labels. Generally the only labels that people get uptight about--and understandably so--are the ones that come with powerful negative prejudices attached. No one's likely to oppress Bob for being a racing enthusiast, or commit a hate crime against me for being a bassist...you start talking about labels like black or Jewish or gay, and it's a different story.
My point is, don't fight labels. Fight prejudice. If we can make being gay as acceptable as, um...collecting stamps or something, then the word gay will be as innocuous as the word..what is it, philatelist? Just one more way of signifying who we are to our fellow human beings.
Oh, and one more thing: WILLOW IS GAY.
by Dr.G » Mon May 28, 2001 12:36 am
Willow is GAY. She is a beautiful intelligent woman in passionate love with another beautiful intelligent woman. They are wonderful human beings and they are happy together. That is their label, or what it has given them anyway, and darn it, I wish it was mine as well. 
And being awake for 27 hours and being Dutch isn't improving my powers of expression, nor my typing skills. *sigh* [This message has been edited by Dr.G (edited May 28, 2001).]
by tommo » Mon May 28, 2001 9:20 am
I totally sympathise with people not liking labels or anything, but in the end, you have to identify yourself with some part of society. And right now, when it counts, Willow identifies herself as gay. It's good enough for me that she says it, does it, acts it and shows it with or without Tara. I don't ask for any more than for them to be happy together, being what they are.
Gay as stick...(never did find out what that means exactly...)
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"It doesn't matter, really, if I don't see Willow tonight, she knew. Willow was in her life, for keeps. That was what mattered." ~ Tara, Unseen: The Burning
by littlekitty » Mon May 28, 2001 3:51 pm
by tommo » Mon May 28, 2001 4:11 pm
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"It doesn't matter, really, if I don't see Willow tonight, she knew. Willow was in her life, for keeps. That was what mattered." ~ Tara, Unseen: The Burning
by _nikk1 » Mon May 28, 2001 6:49 pm
by Him » Mon May 28, 2001 6:52 pm
Because bonking the same sex just sickens me. It is like telling me to be a necrophiliac, I just can't, it doesn't feel right. I know, it's all a mental thing, but this mental thing is pretty strong on my part. Bonk whomever you wish, just don't bonk me if you're my gender.
bonk is such a bonkin good word.
by xita » Mon May 28, 2001 6:55 pm
[This message has been edited by xita (edited May 28, 2001).]
by tommo » Mon May 28, 2001 7:10 pm
Sigh. Makes you wonder sometimes. I'm sorry Him, but you haven't made yourself welcome here at all with this kind of rant.
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"It doesn't matter, really, if I don't see Willow tonight, she knew. Willow was in her life, for keeps. That was what mattered." ~ Tara, Unseen: The Burning
by Roxton » Mon May 28, 2001 7:32 pm
by BBOvenGuy » Mon May 28, 2001 7:52 pm
by Prairiegirl » Mon May 28, 2001 8:27 pm
Labels are important. I am a lesbian. I claim that label and it is empowering. It ties me to people like Da Vinci, Elanor Roosevelt, Plato. It gives me a community of people who have similar experiences to mine, a group where I belong. It is as important a thing that defines me as my ethnicity, as my home town and home state, as my height and weight and skin color. It surely isn't everything I am but it describes an important part of me. When Willow says that she is gay, she is claiming that heritage, that community, those shared experiences. She is defining a part of who she is, labeling herself. She is making a statement to herself and to the larger world about how she wants to live her life and what is inside her. As Dazey also noted, it isn't the fact that you claim the label that is problematic. It is how people react. There are two reactions that are problematic. One is when people treat me poorly because of this label. Enough said on this topic. The second, and equally problematic, is when people want to ignore that I am a lesbian, in some attempt to treat me just like everyone else. Unfortunately, I am not like everyone else. Dismissing this fact about me dismisses a really big part of who I am. Willow was afraid and uncomfortable about taking on this label (in the ep where they kill Adam) but now has embraced it. Over and over (hello, gay now - we're gay-type lesbian lovers - etc) she claims the label and embraces it. She doesn't want her friends to be hurtful because of this label but neither does she want them to ignore it. I agree with the folks who have said that everyone should respect that.
edited to add: Some labels are very limiting, but if you are proud of who you are it shouldn't matter. What matters is that you,want, and embrace that label because it is who you are and this is who I Am.
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WILLOW:
...I'd totally be blowing off classes if I was in Dawnie's shoes.
TARA:
Sweetie, you wouldn't blow off class if your head was on fire.
[This message has been edited by wiltar4evr (edited May 29, 2001).]
-Amy
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"You want to take a picture of my butt?...ummm...OK...You've got two seconds." -Amber
by wiltar4evr » Tue May 29, 2001 9:05 am
edited to add: Some labels are very limiting, but if you are proud of who you are it shouldn't matter. What matters is that you,want, and embrace that label because it is who you are and this is who I Am.
------------------
WILLOW:
...I'd totally be blowing off classes if I was in Dawnie's shoes.
TARA:
Sweetie, you wouldn't blow off class if your head was on fire.
[This message has been edited by wiltar4evr (edited May 29, 2001).]
by WbBuffyfan00 » Tue May 29, 2001 9:08 am
-Amy
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"You want to take a picture of my butt?...ummm...OK...You've got two seconds." -Amber
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