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Relinquished Symmetry

Willow and Tara live happy together in a place untouched by Mutant Enemy. This is a forum for Willow and Tara Fan Fiction (i.e. fan fiction, top 10s, etc...) Please read the content advisories on individual stories, read at your own discretion.

Re: Part 10

Postby Viximon » Mon Jan 24, 2005 7:31 am

O_______________O





-me staring gaping like a fish in front of the computer-



HOLY...

Oh MY!



What a shock. That's so sad. For Willow to share her power, be drained by the love of her live (who suposedy teared into peaces her heart) and for Tara too, discovering the truth the hard way and knowing she had hurt Willow all that time (as much or maybe more, that the redhead hurt her back on the past)



-me sniffing-



Wow! Now I wouldn't can sleep, for sure.

UPDATE SOON, NOW, ALREADY!!!!

My awe to this great fic of yours

Viximon
 


Re: Part 10

Postby Claudia M Gregory » Mon Jan 24, 2005 8:59 am

This is great! It really is and this recent post that revelation or discovery just blew me away. I was staring at the screen, eyes wide, jaw unhinged, thinking "Oh, holy God! How could this happen?"



So good job! I wondered if Willow didn't distance herself from her friends partly as a reflex action to how avoid-y they became of her when Oz left her the first time. And maybe a part of her had felt like a fool to choose Tara over Oz only to find out later that Tara had gone.



Sometimes pain is so great that it drives a person to withdraw. And then final blow of pain Not only was Tara gone but Willow's magick gone, depleted --magick she had shared with Tara. Made even more beautiful to Willow because of Tara ... it had become an intimate connection -a bridge, a link between Willow and Tara. GONE. Wow. Such a thing might make one so vulnerable and afraid ... the world itself might seem like something to flee from.



I wonder if this Magick draining from Willow and pouring into Tara might have begun during the "flaming O" ... spell. heh. It would not have been a draining early on but maybe an unconscious sharing of magickal energy boosting both girls' ability and Tara's leaving Willow,effectively crushing Willow's heart, and depleting Willow emotionally might have created the magick drain. Humh ... For certainly when Tara left she took the best of Willow "metaphorically speaking," with her. And I don't mean just the Magick!



Like I said this is Great.



Claudia

Claudia M Gregory
 


Re: Part 10

Postby stillrunning » Mon Jan 24, 2005 9:05 am

What?! But the...and the...WAIT A MINUTE!! Ok, so Willow has been masking her 'power' because she really doesn't have any at all...she gave it all to Tara?! But...why?? Oh piffle, I need an update of the soonish variety. This was a definite twist...good one...but definately not something I expected.

"Heaven's not a place that you go when you die...it's that moment in life when you actually feel alive"

stillrunning
 


Part 10 replies

Postby hermitfish » Tue Jan 25, 2005 4:15 pm

Well, my brain does feel like the salty, icy slush on the road today but I think I can manage some replies...



MissKittys Ball O Yarn: Hmmm...did I shock you speechless? I don't know whether to feel good or worried, cause I like when you speak to me and all.



silentinformer: Yes, twisty indeed and yes they're very connected (even more than we thought). More details and explanations are coming...I just had to get the biggest 'ta-da' out of the way first. This like Alias? Phsaw...but thanks. Yum...Jennifer Garner...mmmm...sidetracky mind...and THIS is why I love feedback. :)



xonethousandtears08x: Thanks...more is in the works. :)



eklipsej: Yeah, definitely unexpected...definitely changes some things. I have to admit that I love begging, so thanks...I'll do my best on the next part but speed may be an issue.



serendipitous: Thanks. I'm glad some of the pieces are starting to fit together...I'm working on the rest.



hidden watson:
Quote:
This is an unexpected turn of affairs, so totally out of the blue, yet if we thought about it, not so implausible.


Yay...is what I say to that. I was afraid I had taken the turn too sharply and maybe it would seem implausible. I'm very glad I didn't chase you off and you want more.



Viximon: You pretty much encapsulated the situation, so kudos. Your interest, kindness, excitement, and awe are what graces my muse to whisper in my ear. Please, get some sleep...I can't update that fast and I don't want to be the cause of haggard kitties. :)



Grimlock72: Now, the real question is can I redeem brownie points for actual brownies? :)



I'm working up to some of your questions such as why she didn't get help from the scoobies, grey auraness, what is going on with that connection, and what exactly it is doing to Willow. The next update should answer some bits about Isabella, what she is to Willow and what she knows.



Quote:
All the security-systems in the world can't protect you against yourself. Willow's pretty much learning that the hard way. If Tara is the only person she has to stay away from, why let her in?


Now, I love that first line. She does know that Tara is who she needs protection from but despite that she still has some feelings for her that are acting against that.



And I can say 'Yes, absolutely' to many of your other statements. Willow wasn't full disclosure girl because she thinks Tara did this on purpose. Tara is gonna be in Guiltsville real soon. This is my favorite, however:



Quote:
So now I feel sorry for Willow and Tara, for living so long with the wrong perception of each other


Yes, perception is a pretty fickle thing. One minute we think we understand something/someone only to find we don't at all. I appreciate the questions/comments...they keep me on my toes.



Claudia M Gregory: You've really hit on the emotions running through the story. There isn't just one reason why Willow withdrew or only one way to explain what she is going through emotionally. But a lot of those ideas you have could definitely be chalked up to it.

Quote:
For certainly when Tara left she took the best of Willow "metaphorically speaking," with her. And I don't mean just the Magick!


Indeed. Thanks so much for the remarks...I enjoy them immensely.



stillrunning: 'Gave' maybe not the exact terminology I would use. Don't worry...this will start coming together sooner rather than later. Thanks for stopping by.





Okay...the tentative plan is to work on Fragments next and then I'll come back to this one. Part 3 of Fragments is currently in...well, fragments :) ...and I don't have a timeline for it although I think I'll get some free time this weekend to play around. As always...I'm very greatful to you all.





~Cyd




All you need to start an asylum is an empty room and the right kind of people.

~Eugene Pallette in My Man Godfrey (1936)



Altered Shadows

hermitfish
 


Re: Part 10 replies

Postby MissKittys Ball O Yarn » Tue Jan 25, 2005 4:24 pm

hehe Cyd. Yes you did leave me at a loss for words. And thanks, the smelling salts really worked. :laugh My face was stuck in :shock <------ that position for a whole 24 hours after reading your last update. I didn't know if my face would ever be the same again... You are amazing with the plot. I love Twists. I can't wait to see where you are going to take this story. It's my favorite!



xoxo

Emms

I can wax philisophically on a variety of different subjects...that doesn't,however, mean that I have anything constructive to add to the conversation.

--- Me

MissKittys Ball O Yarn
 


Re: Part 10

Postby tarawhipped » Tue Jan 25, 2005 7:39 pm

First off Cyd, my apologies for being absent (umm...I had a note...but Miss Kitty ate it). I must have been more out of it than I realized, cause somehow I missed that you updated two days ago. Jeez...my bad.



And WOW what an update. I did not see that coming. So Tara somehow tapped into Willow's power, but without Tara around, Willow all but lost hers (or never developed it in the first place)? That's a really intriguing twist. After the last chapter and at the start of this one, I had such high hopes that being in the same room and talking would be a good thing. Now though...yikes. While it would make sense on some level that Willow would isolate herself from her friends since she saw her witchy powers as the way to help, and without them she feels "less than," I can't help wonder if there's more to it. And since you have already established yourself as a master of the WTF??? plot twists, I'm just gonna stop guessing and wait for more.



:peace -Cameron



What should I be but just what I am? - Edna St.Vincent Millay

tarawhipped
 


Some more replies

Postby hermitfish » Tue Jan 25, 2005 10:45 pm

Sorry...don't mean to do this twice in one day but I'm already logged in so here I am...



MissKittys Ball O Yarn: Emms...I'm glad you got your face unstuck...coulda been a very precarious situation, you gallivanting around town with that expression (that little face disturbs me). This is your favorite story? Awww...thanks. Apparently, you have learned that sucking up to me gets you on the top of my 'A-list'. Cause...look...there you are. :)



tarawhipped: Cameron!! I've missed you, my official reviewer. I was afraid you took those double sided, odd-angled puzzle pieces and threw them into the hearth for a little winter good riddance warmth.



Quote:
I had such high hopes that being in the same room and talking would be a good thing.


Tell me about it...I knew that one was gonna hurt. My other option was to have them shag on the reception desk, in the elevator, and on that very massive king size bed....BUT I could not for the life of me make that flow with the first nine parts. :P



The road is getting less twisty...otherwise I would get dizzy and I'm not very good with motion sickness. My gratitude is yours.





Well, screw the previous plan...I updated Fragments today so I'm guessing that I'll play with this on the weekend.



Until then,



~Cyd






All you need to start an asylum is an empty room and the right kind of people.

~Eugene Pallette in My Man Godfrey (1936)



Altered Shadows

hermitfish
 


Part 11

Postby hermitfish » Thu Feb 10, 2005 8:48 pm

Hi-ya folks...hope all is well...update now...


PART 11

Isabella balanced a tray with two cups of coffee and a bag of muffins and fruit as she pressed the elevator button.She visited most mornings just so she could get her boss to eat something healthy at least once a day.The redhead mostly ate delivery food or skipped meals entirely and it alarmed the ultra health minded woman enough to slip in an apple or orange whenever she got the chance.

Just as the elevator stopped on the third floor she heard a yell.

“Damnit Willow, what the hell is wrong with you?”

It was a question tinged with anger.Isabella hated loud arguments…she had been around too many in her life.She reached into her purse and wrapped her hands around an object of protection.

“Did you come to see what’s left?Get the final victory?”

Her boss sounded cold, empty, and maybe even a little scared.Isabella put the food down and fully pulled out her gun.It was a Sunnydale style gun…as in it looked real but was filled with holy water.But the visitor currently with Willow, and she had a good idea who that was, wouldn’t know that from a distance.She took a breath, putting the gun close to her side.

The doors quietly opened and she saw a fearful scene.

Willow was collapsed in front of the sofa, her body limp and resting at an odd angle.The blonde was standing a few feet away – frantic yet cautious.As if she was afraid to get too close.She saw a small necklace, one she recognized as her boss’s protection amulet being guided by a levitation spell.It landed in the empty hand of the redhead.Tara was continuously whispering something Isabella couldn’t quite make out until she got closer.

“Willow, wake up.”

A creak in the wood flooring caused Tara to glance in her direction.Her blue eyes went wide as she stepped back with her hands in the air.

The brunette suddenly realized that was pointing the gun.She hadn’t been aware of lifting and aiming it.She was still confused but something about the demeanor of this woman, that same gentle soul she recognized yesterday, told her to put down the weapon.She followed her instinct and let go of the holy water side arm.

“Please check her…make sure she’s okay,” the blonde asked helplessly.

Isabella nodded and went to check vitals.It was a little too deja vu for her taste, after all she had just done the same for Tara hours before.Her pulse and breathing seemed normal though her boss was still unconscious.

“She’ll be fine,” the assistant said as she positioned the woman more naturally.

“She c-can’t let g-go of that charm,” Tara said in a rush, afraid it would fall out if the taller woman jostled her hand too much.

“Well, why don’t I put that back on then,” Isabella offered as she lifted Willow’s hand to her own neck and placed the charm there, keeping it in bodily contact the whole time.As soon as she affixed it to her neck she met the blonde’s eyes.

“Why don’t you tell me why this was off?” she questioned with a raised eyebrow.

“S-she took it off…I would never d-do that to her.Oh, Goddess what have I done?How did this happen?”It was the last coherent sentence as the blonde heavily fell back into the chair and sobbed into her hands.

Isabella sighed and saw to dragging Willow onto the couch and covering her with a throw blanket.Tara had yet to calm down.

“Hospital…we’ve…”

Isabella cut her off.“Boss wouldn’t want that.She’ll come around…she always does.”

“This has happened before?”

“Not quite this…but let’s just say we had our fair share of strange happenings.”




It was dimly lit in the alley behind the club…but it was clean and fairly quiet, which was a marked difference from L.A. Isabella had just moved to Sunnydale from that superficial hellhole.What she didn’t know was that Sunnydale was a hell all its own.

When the ‘man’ approached her and used a cheesy come on line, she rolled her eyes and kept moving towards her car.When the man further approached her, she turned, sprayed him with mace, kneed him in the valuables, and made a run for it.He was barely swayed.When he grabbed her and morphed into a bumpy thing, she screamed like a regular b-movie heroine.Someone answered her call.

“Incindere,” the redhead spoke.A massive wall of flames erupted from her hands..the vampire disintigrated into dust and the wall of the building behind them was scorched solid black.Yet Isabella was unharmed…she seemed to be encased in a watery protective sphere.

As the sphere shimmered away, Willow stared at her hands and mumbled, “But nothing has happened in so long…”She then collapsed to the ground.




“I remember trying to take her to the hospital and she murmured that they couldn’t fix the magick.I thought she was a nut job.But then after seeing all that stuff, I kind of thought I was going crazy too.I took her to my apartment and she woke up the next morning on my couch.”

“Was it gray then too…after she channeled that?” asked distractedly.

“What?” Isabella responded curiously.

“Her aura?”Tara knew what the gray meant.It meant bare essence…nearly the lowest feasible amount of life energy a person can sustain on.

“Oh…I don’t know, I don’t have any hocus pocus powers,” the brunette shrugged.

Tara stared at the floor.
It’s not that Willow doesn’t have power…it's that there is an imbalance in our connection.If we can figure out how this happened, we could rebalance the energies and sever the connection.The only way to sever it would be with a joint spell…and she couldn’t find me before.Hmm...she was always stronger then me so why didn’t she just take back her power?
Tara deflated in realization.
She knew it would hurt me.


“I should g-go…I shouldn’t be near her,” Tara said as she stood and began backing towards the elevator.

Isabella met the frightened witch’s actions and clasped their hands together.

“In all the time I’ve known that woman I have gained a little perspective about her.She is the most intense, hard working soul I have ever met.She is private and full of resolve…so generous despite her problems.She keeps Buffy financially afloat so she can be the slayer, she lines up all the contract work she can for the construction company Xander works for so he can be successful and independent, and she keeps track of Dawn’s report cards and occasionally lines up tutors.Not to mention what she’s done for me.Now I may disagree with her methods and her imposed isolation, but she believes it to be necessary, so I trust her judgement.And I know she had to have let you in, considering all this security, so I’ll trust her judgement again until she tells me otherwise.You’re welcome to stay until she wakes up.”

Tara had to fight the trigger that told her to run.The instinct that’s been telling her to run all her life.From her kin. From the demon.From every town the last three years.From Willow.

She sat back down with a stronger sense of purpose.

She was going to stay and fight this time.





When I'm sitting here with you, I don't even think about the slime people.
~The
very
romantic lead in
The Slime People (1962)



Altered Shadows
Edited by: hermitfish at: 2/15/05 11:15 am
hermitfish
 


Re: Part 11

Postby pipsberg » Thu Feb 10, 2005 10:25 pm

Cyd,



I missed commenting on the last update. I just wanted to let you know that I am really enjoying this! I love the premise of Tara leaving upsetting their balance and I really look forward to finding out the details of what happened... and of course, how Tara is 'gonna fix it!



:peace

-pipsberg



"We live our lives, do whatever we do, and then we sleep - it's as simple and ordinary as that."

Michael Cunningham, The Hours

pipsberg
 


Re: Part 11

Postby hidden watson » Fri Feb 11, 2005 7:33 am

I like Isabella, it's nice to get to know a little of her history and why she came to work for Willow. How she knows about everything Willow's done for Buffy, Xander and Dawn, even though she personally has been distant. But she can never help Willow out with the magic stuff:
Quote:
“Oh…I don’t know, I don’t have any hocus pocus powers,” the brunette shrugged.
Willow hasn't had anyone magical close to her all these years, which is why she is in the condition she is now.



Need to get to the bottom of the charm's power and how to address the imbalance and have Tara return some of Willow's power back. Definitely need fixing.



Now of course like a good kitten I'm a sucker for smut, so can you arrange for some shagging too? I mean, to re-balance themselves and to re-connect will take something like, oh I don't know, may be sex magic from a spell akin to the Great Rite?

------

quiet thoughts

Edited by: hidden watson at: 2/11/05 6:34 am
hidden watson
 


RE

Postby MissKittys Ball O Yarn » Fri Feb 11, 2005 8:06 am

Oh wow. Great update Cyd. I really love Isabella which is strange for me, cause extra characters usually start to irritate me after the first couple updates. (Even my own) But I really like the way you've made Isabella a no-nonsense kinda gal. I guess she would have to be, in order to be around Willow the way she is.



I'm glad that Tara's going to stay and help Willow through all of what's going on. I hope she can hold out even if Willow fights her and tells her to leave. I have a feeling things are going to get worse before they get better. But love conquers all....and I'm sure that Tara will help her to know that.



wonderful job.... I'm so glad you updated this story...cause you know it's my favorite. (i'm not sucking up either....at least not this time..... :flirt )



Shoul I take a chance and ask.... Will there be another update soon? :eyebrow



you know I luv ya! :love



xoxo

Emms

Edited by: MissKittys Ball O Yarn at: 2/11/05 7:08 am
MissKittys Ball O Yarn
 


Re: RE

Postby stillrunning » Fri Feb 11, 2005 3:08 pm

Go Isabella! I was prepared to hate her, throw things at her, whatever was necessary, but I like that she's trying to help Tara help Willow. And I LOVE that Tara has decided to stick around. Maybe it'll help Willow trust her more or something like that. Great job!

"Heaven's not a place that you go when you die...it's that moment in life when you actually feel alive"

stillrunning
 


Re: RE

Postby Traveler4069 » Sat Feb 12, 2005 12:12 pm

Old and slow-Just found this great story and had to read it through in one sitting. I.m hooked and can hardly wait for future updates. Thanks Traveler

Traveler4069
 


Re: Part 11

Postby Viximon » Sun Feb 13, 2005 3:33 am

:sob MMHHBUAaaaaaaa Poor Willow (What a scare when she was found out cold, you give me) , With that "gray" aura :cry

And poor Tara snif snif .She sluttered and all :aww



I'm so moved with the chapter that I can't make a review nice enough :( sorry about that.



I LOVE the story, continue soon, please please please :aww

Viximon
 


Replies are a go...

Postby hermitfish » Sun Feb 13, 2005 7:54 am

First off...thanks to all you great reviewers, I've got one of those little blue lightning thingies...woohoo.



Replies...



pipsberg: Hi-ya Pips...no worries on missed comments...it's just good to hear from you now. :) Yeah...more details are forthcoming...I'm happy you like the premise...I know it took a little while to get to the meat of it so thanks for continuing to ride along.



hidden watson: Howdy Watson...
Quote:
Willow hasn't had anyone magical close to her all these years, which is why she is in the condition she is now.


Certainly could be a factor. More discovery and fixing to come...



And you’re requesting smut? There are kittens that like smut on this board?!? I never would have guessed. :P



Hmm...I didn't actually answer your question did I? :P



MissKittys Ball O Yarn: Hey Emms...glad you like the side character...I thought no nonsense with a touch of stubbornness would be good companion traits to have if your gonna be that close to Willow in her current status. I honestly am not a big fan of extra characters either. In this story I had to have someone who could voice things that Willow refuses to. I'll still try to use her sparingly.



Quote:
I hope she can hold out even if Willow fights her and tells her to leave. I have a feeling things are going to get worse before they get better.


Worse before they get better? How can you say that? Everything was SO happy up until now...you've jinxed it. :P



It's your favorite story AND you're not just sucking up? You've really brightened up a less than stellar day...um week for me...so thanks for that.



You know if I had minions to work on all my RL projects, I would update everyday...just for you. Unfortunately, that so is not the case. Darnit, I want minions! How about if I work on Part 12 of this next and not flip-flop to Fragments...luv me more? As always...a pleasure.



stillrunning: I had a feeling the moment I introduced Isabella everybody had set their phasers to kill that !%@@@#!!! who's pseudo close to Willow. That's why I made it clear pretty quick that they were not more than friends/business associates. I didn't think this mess needed 'the other woman' on top of everything. She does want to help Willow and thinks Tara could be a way to do that...even if she's unsure about the whats and hows. I think Tara is much stronger at this point than when she left and not running from this horribleness shows that. Thanks so much for the input. :)



Traveler4069: Welcome Traveler...wow...you read it one sitting? I was typing on it the other day, noticed it was over 40+ pages, and wondered when THAT had happened. Glad to see you’re hooked. Thanks.



Viximon: I liked your review just fine...it was plenty nice. :) I know what your mean though...I often feel when I give replies that I never express how much I enjoy someone taking the time to tell me what they think/feel as much as I want to.

Anyway, the next bit will go back to a more direct W/T interaction...so we'll see how it goes...thanks so much.





I'm starting the next part of this today...perhaps it will be coming to a board near you soon.



~Cyd




When I'm sitting here with you, I don't even think about the slime people.

~The very romantic lead in The Slime People (1962)



Altered Shadows

hermitfish
 


Part 12

Postby hermitfish » Tue Feb 15, 2005 1:12 pm

Okay so I said this...
Quote:Anyway, the next bit will go back to a more direct W/T interaction...
Perhaps we won't call me a liar, but this part went in a little different direction than my initial anticipation.This is also a little shorter than usual...sorry for that.Part 13 has a W/T guarantee...we'll clear up this whole liar thing eventually.

Update now....






Relinquished Symmetry





Disclaimer:
Many rich people own BTVS and its characters…I am not one of them.


Rating:
R


Author’s Notes:
This storyline takes everything up to halfway through New Moon Rising as the gospel.I have made a BIG change that may make some kittens ‘thwack’ me with a shovel…or, more appropriately, a sledgehammer.Also, some of the dynamics of Angel have been altered to suit me.This is an angsty piece.


Addt’l note:
A few pieces of dialogue come from the show (This Year’s Girl, NMR, Fear Itself, etc.).


Feedback:
Of any sorts…sure.On the board is fine.No posting elsewhere without my consent.





PART 12

Willow woke up a few hours later to the sound of a slight snore.She tilted her head sideways, finding the source of the nearly inaudible noise was Tara dozing in her armchair.The corner of her lip curled upwards and she shook her head.

For three years she had kept herself together in the best way she knew how and it only took minutes with the blonde to feel like she was shattering and dividing.

Part of her was angry.For leaving and betraying her…taking everything away.

Part of her was ashamed.How could she say such cruel thing to her?It was as if Tara deserved more respect from her than that.

Part of her was scared.She knew she’d do whatever the blonde wanted…she had little restraint when it came to her.She stilled cared more about Tara than herself…and she didn’t know what would remain after she gave in to whatever her ex-lover wanted now.

And part of her was so happy.Just to get a few minutes to see that beautiful face again.

She approached the blonde quietly.Moved to brush away an errant lock of hair with her hand, but pulled up just short, remembering that disaster yesterday.She hadn’t known the amulet would react like that, exactly, and she wasn’t looking for a repeat.It had been the miserable confirmation of all the facts her brain and heart already knew.

Willow didn’t suspect Tara when she first lost the ability to do spells shortly after she left.She couldn’t even float a pencil but thought it was emotional turmoil getting in the way of her casting.It wasn’t until one night she felt her power rip away in a burst that she realized it was not her emotions causing her troubles.

She checked her aura, just the way Tara taught her, and saw the truth.Her power was leeching towards some other source.Her brain told her one thing – that there was a correlation between her magick loss and Tara’s departure.Her heart told her another – that woman has the soul of an angel…she would never do this to me.

She met with Mr. Bogarty, friend to both witches and proprietor of a magick shop. He helped her acquire Sava’s Amulet.The protection and masking spells on it were really top notch but they didn’t stop the leeching.The amulet did, however, make her more aware of the changing flows and fluxes…she was not stripped, just unbalanced.She also realized night was when she was depleted most often…it was when the pull came, no matter how tiny or large.

She drew her eyes over the sleeping woman.It was really no wonder why now.Tara hunted at night…that was when she called on the magick.

Even as her brain became more and more confident of the truth, her heart still held out.When Mr. Bogarty suggested she personalize the charm against the other source to stop the transfer, it became the final test between her head and heart.

Her head won.Personalizing it against Tara stopped the transfer, leaving her magickally weak but no longer in danger.Her heart became very quiet…very cold.

She no longer wanted anything to do with magick.The reminder was too steep.She tucked it away and found solace in science.

Instinct brought it back again the night she heard Isabella scream.She had been walking home from picking up some takeout…a rarity for her to be out at all.She ran towards the scream in full force, her body knowing the Scooby procedure.When she willed the spell, not thinking about her imbalance or how she wouldn’t have enough power, it spewed forth with an intensity that nearly tore her apart.It had felt feral…unpredictable…it scared her deeply.The only thing that scared her more was understanding that she had ripped that power away from Tara.She knew how strange, painful, and empty that felt.She wondered if Tara was okay.

It was the last time she ever did a spell.It was the last time she got anywhere near a dangerous situation.She could protect herself from the world.Protect the world from her.

Willow let her hand hover over that soft face.She traced the contours of her sculptured cheekbones, the light furrow on her brow that seemed to be coming from a dream and the fullness of her lips.All in slow, repetitive motions just above her skin.Tara seemed so close and yet further away than ever at the same time.


I still love you.I still hate you.


Her head and heart never could agree.


I still love you.I still hate you.


She sighed and dropped her hand into a pocket, lowering her eyes and feeling tears gather from a well she thought she had sealed.

She glanced up again...bright blue eyes were open, meeting hers big and wide.





When I'm sitting here with you, I don't even think about the slime people.
~The
very
romantic lead in
The Slime People (1962)



Altered Shadows
hermitfish
 


RE

Postby MissKittys Ball O Yarn » Tue Feb 15, 2005 1:43 pm

Hi! :bigwave



okay, so I was on my way out the door when, by chance (and by chance I mean on purpose) I was checking the board to see if there were any new updates...anyway...to make a long story short... I haven't read it yet (cause I'm now officially late) but when I get home this will be the first place I stop.



I cant wait ! *Squeals!* *runs off*



luv ya!



xoxo

Emms

MissKittys Ball O Yarn
 


Re: RE

Postby stillrunning » Tue Feb 15, 2005 2:12 pm

Ok, that's friggin sad! I understand the whole magic thing now, but still! IT'S SAD! And now Willow got busted by Tara doing the whole face tracey thing...so hopefully some explanations and talking will come about in the NEXT update(if what you said wwwaaayyy up there is true). Can't wait!

"Heaven's not a place that you go when you die...it's that moment in life when you actually feel alive"

stillrunning
 


RE

Postby MissKittys Ball O Yarn » Tue Feb 15, 2005 4:07 pm

Oh Cyd...that was so tragically, beautifully sad... I really feel for Willow... Tara leaving really took so much from her (literally) Im glad we got a deeper look into Willow's feelings this time around...



And, not to worry, there may not have been too much conscious interaction between Willow and Tara in this update But there was plenty of the unconscious variety..at least they were in the same room together...that's something right? :D it was still so wonderful....



I love the way Willow woke up to the soft sounds of Tara's.... hehe...um snoring :)



I need the next update to be posted right now! :cry but I have the sneaky suspicion you're going to make me wait. Oh well... I can be patient. (probably)



MissKittys Ball O Yarn
 


Re: RE

Postby hidden watson » Tue Feb 15, 2005 6:34 pm

Quote:
Her head and heart never could agree.

I still love you. I still hate you.
Last time head won and look at the heartbreak, so may be it's time for heart to have a say? That was so sad, I really felt for Willow, when she discovered the source of her magic depletion.



It's obvious that Tara didn't know, so it's time for Willow to forget the hate, and try to build the love, please?



------

quiet thoughts

hidden watson
 


Re: Part 12

Postby russ » Tue Feb 15, 2005 7:12 pm

As we see more of what Willow has gone through, I'm tremendously impressed by the power of her love for Tara. Think of what Tara did to her: left her without a word "taking everything away", made no contact for three years, yet kept draining Willow's power through a magical link. How could Willow not think it was deliberate? Yet still her love is strong enough to struggle with the hate and fear.



Watson says,
Quote:
"It's obvious that Tara didn't know, so it's time for Willow to forget the hate, and try to build the love."
It is obvious, to us, but not yet to Willow. Tara's got some serious grovelling to do before they can start to fix what's wrong and rebuild what was lost.



A beautiful but sad look into Willow's heart and mind; it explains why she has become cold and reclusive. Broken by Tara's loss, she will only be healed by being reunited with her.

Russ



When we love and give it everything we've got, no matter what the consequences, we are doing what we were put here to do -- Geneen Roth

russ
 


Re: Part 12

Postby xonethousandtears08x » Tue Feb 15, 2005 8:50 pm

:happycry

i dont know what to say...

but..

:clap

xonethousandtears08x
 


re

Postby Viximon » Wed Feb 16, 2005 5:56 am

Minyaaaaa:love

:happycry

I hope heart's Willow won head's Willow :banana (love those eufemism and soooo understand how the situation is)

Uahh, I can't wait for Tara and Willow to speak again ans solve the hurt.



PS: Buffy and the others are still in the shadows about all that :lol It will be cool when they found out.



Great fic, fabulous chapter. You're great :bow :bow

Continue soon, please ;)

Viximon
 


Re: re

Postby MissKittys Ball O Yarn » Wed Feb 16, 2005 7:51 pm

Cyd, Cyd, Cyd I'm just sittin' here... wishing there was an update from you... :flirt And I was wondering... :eyebrow if it's going to be much longer before you post one... :| *soft sigh* okay.... I can wait a little longer.... if I must... :blush





Edited to add... Okay, so I realize it's only been one day... But I can't help it! I'm smitten! Thats right... Im a smitten kitten... and also Cyd-update addicted... (i think I may need medication) :blush ;)



xoxo

Emms

I can wax philisophically on a variety of different subjects...that doesn't,however, mean that I have anything constructive to add to the conversation.

--- Me

Edited by: MissKittys Ball O Yarn at: 2/16/05 6:54 pm
MissKittys Ball O Yarn
 


Re: Part 12

Postby Irishgrl3 » Thu Feb 17, 2005 3:17 pm

Jumping out of my lurking hole to say how great this fic is. So full of intrigue... I'm on the edge of my seat waiting to see what will happen next, so update soon cause my ass is starting to fall asleep sitting in this position. Hee-hee. :D

Irishgrl3
 


The reply portion of the program...

Postby hermitfish » Fri Feb 18, 2005 7:28 am

Grrrr...I hate getting up for early classes but writing replies makes it significantly better...



stillrunning:
Quote:
I understand the whole magic thing now
Holy crap...really? Hooray! That was kinda why this update got wedged in here...I decided to clarify some things from Willow's pov. Yes...I'm guaranteeing W/T talking in the next part...I'm very seldom a naughty liar. :)



MissKittys Ball O Yarn: Hi-ya Emms...anticipatory squealing...me likey. :D
Quote:
Im glad we got a deeper look into Willow's feelings this time around...
That was what I was going for - still needed to play around in Willow's perspective...we've spent quite a while not understanding it. I hope it is becoming clearer.



Whew...I'm glad you liked the part. I had visions of complaining kittens with picket signs wondering if Willow and Tara were actually going to ever be in the story together...admist shaking fists and readied hexes.



Hi my name is Cyd...I may have some neurotic issues. I may also have some narcissistic issues. Who am I kidding? I have the deluxe edition subscriptions to both. :)



All I can say for the next update is be patient hun...your sneaky suspicion is probably dead on. Luv ya'.



hidden watson: Hi Watson...yes, indeed...let's hope for more love, less hate. Like Russ mentioned, it's not clear to Willow yet that this was unintended. Her truth is coming very soon.



russ: Hi Russ...thank you for the summation and thoughts - it was very much to the point. It really is amazing that she still feels love for Tara considering the amount of betrayal she thinks has been perpetrated. But then again love is a very strong emotion between the right two people. It can certainly overcome hate and fear.



xonethousandtears08x: Applause is totally appreciated...words are optional (except for me, cause you know, telling the story with charades is hard on the board :) ). Thanks.



Viximon: Thanks...I'm glad you get what I was going for. Buffy and the gang are in the dark...they deserve a heads up soon, don't they? :)



Emms: I see your patience lasted all of...one day. :) Smitten kitten, huh? I like that. Addicted to my updates? Stop (and by stop I mean please continue), you're making me giddily grin. Now, I hate to say this but I feel myself drifting away from this story for just a little while...I'll ask my muse to come back ASAP so you can get your 'fix'.



Irishgrl3: Heehee...well, that's a first. I've never been coerced into faster updates to prevent butt numbness from edge-of-the-seat related issues. :D I applaud you on the creativity...and, of course, I thank you for emerging from the lurking hole to tell me how much you're enjoying.







I started Fragments last night...I think I know where I want to go and I'll try to get there soon…I’ll definitely get a good portion of it done this weekend. Now off to get ready and walk to class (yikes its ten frickin degrees)...grrr...



~Cyd




When I'm sitting here with you, I don't even think about the slime people.

~The very romantic lead in The Slime People (1962)



Altered Shadows

hermitfish
 


Re: Part 12

Postby Grimlock72 » Fri Feb 18, 2005 8:22 am

I hope head continues winning over heart for a while. Remember that if Willow's heart had won over her head a couple of years ago when deciding to personalize the amulet... well there wouldn't BE a Willow to talk to Tara.



Given Willow's current weak condition I would be very carefull when attempting to normalize the magic balance between them. I still wonder why Willow didn't tell the other scoobies about her problem. I do see why she keeps more to herself, but why not explain the reason behind that to the other scoobies??



Tara is right about wanting to leave for now. It would be wise to figure out what went wrong with both girl a bit apart. I'm not sure if distance has any impact on the magic-leeching, but it might help. Willow is doing all she can to stop her power being leecher out, can't Tara attempt to stop herself from actually taking that power??



Willow must be very tired, recovery will take some time. Advantage of that would be that she and Tara get more time to get some much needed repairs in their relationship done.



...and Willow still doesn't know that Tara isn't intentional stealing her power. (neither do we of course, but lets assume Tara is a good charachter in this story :lol )



Grimmy

--
"You hurt Tara," Willow said too calmly. "The last one who tried that was a god. I made her regret it." -- Unexpected Consequences by Lisa of Nine

Edited by: Grimlock72 at: 2/18/05 7:30 am
Grimlock72
 


Re: Part 12

Postby MissKittys Ball O Yarn » Sat Feb 19, 2005 2:42 pm

NO! :cry what? you're drifting?? :cry OH WHAT A CRUEL CRUEL WORLD! *sniff sniff* Oh..... did you say you were going to work on your other story? *sniff sniff* *wipes eyes* okay :blush that will do.







xoxo

Emms



I can wax philisophically on a variety of different subjects...that doesn't,however, mean that I have anything constructive to add to the conversation.

--- Me

MissKittys Ball O Yarn
 


Re: Part 12

Postby tarawhipped » Sat Feb 19, 2005 3:42 pm

Dammit, I think I missed leaving you feedback again Cyd! How 'bout I make it up to you? You're cold, right? *hands Cyd a warm fluffy blanky, snuggly moose slippers, and a big mug o' hot chocolate* Better?



Every time you update I have to remind myself that so much of their canon relationship never happened, and hence the massive amount of distrust. It's so painful to think of Willow convincing herself that Tara basically used her, but it makes sense from her history, self-doubt, and abandonment issues. At the point where they parted ways Willow was already so emotionally fragile, but the magical transferance rendered her physically frail, as well. I love that you still have her quitting magic so as not to harm Tara, showing that no matter how much she may try to steel her feelings, it's obvious she continued to care about her deeply.



Still, they both got some 'splaining to do...they better get with it already and get to the smoochies!

:peace -Cam



What should I be but just what I am? - Edna St.Vincent Millay

tarawhipped
 


Re: Part 12

Postby Nellinoz » Sun Feb 20, 2005 7:43 am

gulp.....so sad!!! :sob Please let it all be better soon! I am so a sucker for a happy ending that I end up squirming at the thought of not getting one :pray



Nell :wave

Nellinoz
 

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