The Questions and (un)-Answers game

[umgaynow]

Isn't it obvious...he was trying to get into the pants of a girl who worked at Supercuts

What's the deal with kittens anyway?

[Boschi]

12 cards per hand, with the rest in the kitty (of course).

What's black, white and red all over?

[umgaynow]

A Chinese communist skunk

What color are oranges in Ireland?

[jay/wt4evr]

Why, are there oranges in Ireland? I thought they were the top of lephricauns' hats!

The world is older than any of us know...so why do we know it's age?

[She_is_the_strangest_girl]

the world is actually a spherical tree, so some sciene types, or possably tree forestry type people, im not sure, anyway they just counted its rings.

why does newly applied nailvarnish always chip?

[thiswomanswork]

Oh, it doesnt chip... it comes pre-chipped. To give it that 'lived-in', comfy look.

Where do black holes really end up?

[CrazyTaraWitch]

Black holes are the eyes of the giant spider that rules the universe. Duh!

Where do babies *really* come from?

[willntarra4eva]

Why the black side of the moon! Where else?

Why does the sun make things hot?

[gorn]

Funky Cold Medina. It's better than any alcohol or afrodesiac.

How many fingers am I holding up?

[Boschi]

Mauve.

Why are these shoes called "Crocs"?

[Paint the Sky]

It comes from a conversation that occured in the marketing department of the company that makes these.

It went something like this:

Marketing man No.1: Jesus, have you seen the product they want us to shift now? Do they even have a name for them?

Marketingman No.2: I've seen the product, they're called Crocs.

MM No.1 Crocs?

MM No.2: Yep - its short for crock of shit.

Why can't you make music with a drain-pipe?

[She_is_the_strangest_girl]

you can, you can use it as a sort of bad dijaridoo by blowing down it, or tap on it & it sounds like an out of tune bongo

... unless of course your refering to the jeans then i have nothing, i faint rustling is all the music i could get out of them

how did my five pound note manage to survive through a hot wash & come out in one piece & still as crisp as if its new?!

[umgaynow]

The obvious answer would be that it took Queen Victoria's advice and closed its eyes and thought of England

Why are gay waiters always better?

[Boschi]

It's the whole pretty and witty thing... it just works.


Where the hell did my beer go?

[gorn]

Sorry ... it's been a long day.

Speaking of drinks, just how much tea is in China?

[thiswomanswork]

All of it.

why are all of the customers that call me so stupid?

[She_is_the_strangest_girl]

bacause there are these teeny tiny robots in telephone lines that direct all the stupid customers to you

why cant shops mark sale clothes with the correct sizes?!

[umgaynow]

It's the aspirin companies, man! A long time ago they brokered a deal with the retail elves...you see, if the sizes and prices were correct at the big after holiday sales, everything would run smoothly and there would be no big scenes and fuming crowds sweating in their winter coats and cursing under their breath about creative ways to kill the idiot in line ahead of them who got the wrong thing...unfortunately, it is a necessary evil...lest all the pain reliever companies have to rely on hangovers and whiny children for their holiday headache dollar

What does Miss Manners have to say about the ettiquette of who sleeps in the wet spot?

[whatmakesyouhappy]

she will tell you it's bad manners to pee in the bed then rub your nose in it.






how come nobody can leave well enough alone

[Boschi]

Well is a bit antisocial. Personally, I think she over compensates.

Where fore art thou?

[Yours]

Thou is seven planets to the right, lookig for the keys thou lost.

How can you make a paint darker than black?

[gorn]

Dip your brush in my coffee, Yours. Black as night, black as coal ... I wanna see the sun blotted out from the sky ...

Who is John Galt?

[Yours]

Is John Gault not the man who cycled to the moon?

Can words save the world?

[gorn]

A: No. But if they could, that would be one of them.

Q: Why are you sitting there like that?

[Yours]

A: Because I'm waiting for the stars to fall from of the sky, so I can catch them and share their joy.

Q: Doesn't it hurt moths when they fly into the light bulb?

[CrazyTaraWitch]

A: They're masochists, they like it.

Q: Why can't I fly when I flap my arms?

[MelCar19]

A: Cause of the invisible midgets holding you down.

Q: Who is buried in Grant's tome?

[Boschi]

A: His autobiographer

'Q: Shall I fold the towels?

[CrazyTaraWitch]

A: Never.

Q: Where do cows come from?

[gorn]

A: Cows

Q: Is this seat taken?