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New Fic - At Any Cost. (Finished 12 Dec)

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Re: New Fic - At Any Cost.

Postby Missocki » Mon Sep 19, 2005 2:18 pm

So I just started reading this today, and DAMN! I'm impressed! This story is fab. The drama the laughs, delightful!

As for the villian, a great one indeed. And I've got a theory about 'him' (yeah I'm not sold as to the 'sex' of the 'person') and the discovery of this theory o' mine cause the Ooooh Oh OH! freak out! But I'm not saying who because, well, that might be rude, and I don't like being rude.

And I must add the Willow and Tara reactions to each other and the what now with Willow's majicks is exactly what I thought they would be going though, and you write it so well.

Can't wait for the next update. :bounce :bounce :bounce
"Anyone can be passionate, but it takes real lovers to be silly." -Rose Franken
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Re: New Fic - At Any Cost.

Postby LeatherQueen » Tue Sep 20, 2005 1:48 pm

Ok, I have to admit - I just read this entire story a few days ago for the first time. And I'm blown away! This is an excellent storyline and so very intriguing. You have me wondering just WHO this BB could be. Can't wait to find out.
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"People flock in, nevertheless, in search of answers to those questions only librarians are considered to be able to answer, such as 'Is this the laundry?', 'How do you spell surreptitious?' and, on a regular basis, 'Do you have a book I remember reading once? It had a red cover and it turned out they were twins.'" -- Terry Pratchett
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Re: New Fic - At Any Cost.

Postby Darth Pacula » Wed Sep 21, 2005 3:46 am

G'day all, and welcome to the latest trip into the depths of my twisted imagination. Continue at your own peril. :-D

As is standard for moi, replies first, then the update.

-----

grimlock72 - Yes indeed, Grimmy. So much for being stealthy. Why did Anya stick around, let alone attack the TUE with her fists? Well, the way I see it ( and hey, I wrote it :-D ) Anya underestimated her opponent, and she does possess greater than human strength as Anyanka. Plus, to be honest she doesn't have that much experience at combat. Most of her years as a vengeance demon were spent using the powers of the wish, as opposed to getting medieval on peoples asses.

I see Anya as more of a physical transformation, like a vampire than I do as glamour, which is just a form of illusion.

Yep, obsession doesn't really make for clear thinking, and the way the TUE keeps stuffing up is proof of that.

Why did he cross into Hyriault in the first place? Good question, but as with so much else about the TUE, I'll be taking my time revealing the reason. And yes, there definitely does seem to be some time line issues. Don't worry, it will all make sense in the end. I hope.

The way I see it, is that the TUE did care for his old master, inasmuch as he is capable of it, but that didn't stop him from doing what he felt he had to do to achieve his goals. That would be pure ruthlessness.

Ahh, the Box, which is really just the magic equivalent to a sensory deprivation tank, isn't actually used to correct criminal behavior, but rather to simply punish. We are talking a demon dimension here, so their concepts of cruel and unusual punishment don't quite meet human standards.

Hoo boy, don't let the TUE hear you comparing him to Warren. He's liable to literally explode. But he is making mistakes left, right and center.

Yes, they all need some time to deal and adjust, but you're right, they're probably not going to get it.

Don't worry, the scoobies are going to get their research hats on properly soon. The only problem is whether or not they can find anything useful.

You're spot on about the 'last hurrah' aspect to the TUE's behavior. So long as he achieves what he's set out to do, he doesn't care what the cost is, to him or anyone else. Hence the title.

I wouldn't say that 'fare thee well' was awfully British so much as archaic. It's kind of a side effect of his time in Hyriault.

Grimmy, if you start being quiet now, who's going to entertain me as much? Behaving is highly overrated.

Thanks for reading, Grimmy.

-----

AntigoneUnbound - Holy batman pun, Mary! I'm not telling quite yet.

Yep, you are spot on. There is a time warp factor going on. Remember what happened to Angel when he got sent to hell at the end of Season 2? Difference in time between the two dimensions? Similar sort of thing. Whoops. I'm giving away all my plot secrets.

There definitely are flashes of humanity in the TUE, no matter how successful he thinks he's been in burning the humanity out of himself. And who wouldn't hate that bell, even if you haven't been trapped in a 'Groundhog Day' -esque situation.

Woo hoo! I've got respect from someone! Can't say that has happened before. It's making me all warm and tingly inside.

Loving that you're loving this, Mary!

-----

Missocki - Greetings friend, and welcome to my own brand of insanity. Glad you're liking it so far.

Yes, the villain is close to my heart. You think you know who he is? And you're doubtful about he/she's gender? Do you really think I would tell everyone he's a guy when he isn't? Hang on, I would do something like that! :devil

If you want to share your theory as to the TUE's identity without potentially spoiling it for everyone else, send me a PM. That way, if your theory is correct, you'll get bragging rights when the truth comes out. And don't worry about being rude, I'm pretty hard to offend.

Anyway, thanks for your kind words. Wait no more, for the next update is coming up next.

-----

LeatherQueen - G'day, LeatherQueen. You're blown away? You poor thing, you'd better get something to weigh you down. :-D Just who is the TUE? I plan to make the wondering last, so buckle up tight and hand on. This is going to be one hell of a ride. Or, I hope so, at least.

PS. I love your quote. Oook. Just don't call him a monkey. Discworld rocks!

-----

I hope everyone enjoys Part 7.

Bye for now,
Paul.


**********


Title: At Any Cost


Author: Paul aka Darth Pacula


Distribution: Knock yourself out, just ask first. ( That means yes if you're not sure )


Feedback: Go nuts. The more the merrier. Unless you're all wanting to roast me at the stake that is. Then, less is more.


Disclaimers: Alas, I own sod bugger all. I wish I did, but I don't.


Summary: A powerful, ruthless and unstable figure begins to meddle in Willow and Tara's lives, with unforseen consequences.


Rating: PG-13, maybe R at times for a touch of violence.


Timeline: Well now, it starts off just before the end of Seeing Red, but will contain elements of an altered Season 7.


Spoilers: Err ... pretty much the entire show. If you haven't seen any of it yet, and actually want to, you just aren't trying hard enough.


Thoughts are in italics.


The story so far ... Tara and Willow have been shocked to learn from Giles that magic isn't actually addictive, and Willow has gotten understandably upset that her problems stem from problems with her own control issues rather than from a physical addiction. Meanwhile, the TUE has gone on a shopping spree at the Magic Box. Which devolved into a smack-down brawl with a pissed off Anyanka and ended with Anya being thrashed and her pendant destroyed.


Part 7.


“Willow? Sweetie?” Tara called out softly through the closed door of their bedroom. “Are you ok?”


Willow did not respond. There was only a cold, empty silence, a silence that chilled Tara to the bone. She hesitantly tried the door handle, and breathed a sigh of relief when it proved to be unlocked. Easing the door open, Tara cautiously poked her head through.


Their bedroom was shrouded in gloom, with all of the curtains pulled tight, and no lights turned on. Tara scanned the room, unable at first to spot her lover. She eventually found Willow huddled in one corner, with her knees pulled up against her chest and her arms wrapped around her legs. Her head was down, resting on her knees.


The image Willow presented made Tara think of a miserable child, hiding from a cruel world. A child that I used to be. I might still have been, if she hadn't found me.


“Will?”


When she didn't respond, not even to lift her head, Tara crossed to her partner's side and settled down beside her. She wordlessly held out her hand in midair, desperately hoping that Willow would take it. Hope blossomed in her heart like a delicate spring blossom when Willow finally did.


“I can't do it, baby,” Willow mumbled without raising her head. Tara reached out and stroked the redhead's hair.


“You can't do what, Will?”


“I can't start using magic again,” she murmured, looking up at Tara with glassy eyes. “I just can't.”


“Why not, Willow?” asked Tara, caressing Willow's cheek. “If Giles is right, then we ... you can do it safely. You won't hurt anyone.”


“I can't take that risk, Tara. I won't.”


“Will ...”


Willow cut her off, shaking her head. “Baby, have you forgotten what I did? To you?” She paused, seeing the flash of memory fleetingly cross Tara's face, and laughed bitterly. “No. You haven't forgotten. But you don't even know everything I did after ... after you left. I was out of control, baby. It's only luck alone that I didn't kill anyone. God only knows what damage I might have done. What damage I did do and just don't know about.”


“Willow, if you don't learn to control your magic properly ... that could all happen again.”


“I'll die before I let that happen,” Willow stated flatly, wearing a bitter version of her 'resolve face'.


“Don't ever say that!” Tara furiously snapped, her grasp on Willow's hand tightening to a painful intensity. “Don't even joke about it!”


“Do you think I'm joking, Tara?” Willow replied firmly, unmoved by Tara's uncharacteristic anger. “I won't let myself hurt you, or anyone else. I couldn't survive that.”


Once she got her anger under control, Tara tried a different tack. “Willow, considering what we are facing, you might not survive if you refuse to use magic. None of us might.”


“And if I start again and lose control?” Willow shot back. “I might end up working with this psycho! I could end up being just as big a threat. Have you forgotten that Giles turned up expecting to fighting me?”


“Willow, what if I'm not strong enough?” Tara whispered, her head dropping so that her face was hidden behind her hair. “What if it falls to me to fight this guy, and I'm not strong enough?”


Reaching out, Willow placed one finger under Tara's chin and gently raised her head so that she could stare into the deep blue eyes that she loved with everything she possessed. “Tara, you are strong enough. Baby, you're one of the strongest people I've ever met. And that's why I can't do this. Because I know I'm not strong enough. I've already proved that, remember?”.


A tentative knock on the door broke both women's concentration, and they both turned to see Dawn standing uncomfortably in the doorway, fidgeting as if she wanted to be anywhere else.


“Dawnie?” Tara called out, keeping her tone mild with difficulty. “What is it?”


“Um ... sorry guys, but Buffy wants us downstairs. Our boy's been busy, apparently.”


**********


“He robbed a bank last night,” Buffy stated grimly. Her rigid stance, arms crossed tightly over her chest, aptly communicated a barely controlled anger.


“Does this seem familiar to anyone?” Xander asked, glancing at each of the scoobies in turn. “First we had that ... M'Sputnik guy rob a bank ...”


“M'Fashnik,” stated Willow softly, correcting Xander on autopilot.


“Right, M'Fashnik. Thanks, Will.” Xander paused, a blank expression on his face. “Where was I?”


“You were pointing out a rather tenuous connection between two individuals of supernatural origin robbing a bank,” stated Giles, his attention focused on polishing his glasses.


“I was?” Xander asked, pasting on a weak grin. “Go me, what with pointing out the obvious.”


“Yes, bravo Xander,” Giles muttered. “Well done. Did you have an actual point?”


“Er ... not so much with the pointy-ness. I was just pointing out that it was ... ya know, kinda weird.”


The Watcher replaced his glasses, and fixed Xander with a piercing gaze. “Thank you ever so much, Xander. Good to know we can always rely on you to point out the blindingly obvious.”


“Hey, always happy to help however I can.”


“Was anybody hurt?” Tara asked, trying to concentrate on the matter at hand, when all she could really think about was the gap between her and Willow on the couch. In reality, it was only a few inches, but it felt to the blonde's heart like a hundred miles.


“A security guard was hurt. I'm not sure how badly, they had already taken him to hospital when I found out.”


“How'd he do it? Rob the bank, I mean?” Willow asked, and Tara's heart swelled to see her lover's innate curiosity begin to drag Willow out of her self-imposed funk. “Not that I want to know because I'm planning to rob a bank myself, 'cause well, that's bad, and I'm not so much with the badness, I just wanted to know for clue type stuff, ... and you're all looking at me now and I think I'll stop talking.”


“Is that even possible, Will?” Buffy asked with a warm smile. “But in what I think is the answer to the the question that didn't want to stop ... I don't know how he did it. I've pretty much told you everything I know. ... About the robbery, I mean. I do know some other stuff.”


“Buffy ...” Giles began, and Tara could hear the doubt in his voice. “What exactly are you basing your conclusion of this new power's involvement on?”


“I just know it, Giles.” Buffy stated firmly, obviously in no mood to argue.


“Sooo ... something set off your spider-sense, Buff?” Xander interjected, hoping to preempt any chance of an argument between Watcher and Slayer. “That's good enough for me.”


Buffy nodded tersely, and Giles cleared his throat, then proceeded to polish his glasses again, despite having done so only minutes ago.


The jangle of the telephone broke the tense silence, and Tara leapt to her feet. “I'll get it,” she blurted. Given the strain that was currently between her and Willow, Tara didn't particularly want to witness what could easily wind up as a shouting match between two of her friends ... no, her family.


“I could hack into the police database,” Willow offered. “Have a look at the crime scene report and see what I can find?” In the back of her head, Willow heard Tara answer the phone.


“That sounds like a highly illegal and dangerous proposition, and I can not condone such an action,” Giles stated wryly.


“So that means go ahead and do it?” Willow asked with an answering smile.


“If you would be so kind.”


Tara returned hurriedly, her gentle face twisted with concern. Willow caught sight of her beloved's expression and felt anxiety twist its claws in her stomach. Goddess, what now?


“It's Anya,” Tara blurted. “She's been hurt. She's in the hospital.”


Before anyone else could even react, before Tara had even finished speaking, Xander was sprinting for the door. His expression was one of complete and utter panic.


**********


Tara hated hospitals, had done so ever since her mother had first gotten sick. Day after day, hour after hour, she had sat in one and watched her mother transform from a strong, vibrant, loving woman into a shell of her former self. In essence, she had seen her mother slowly die by degrees in front of her eyes.


At times, in her darkest nightmares, Tara remembered her own brief visit to Sunnydale Hospital, after her mind had been stolen by Glory. When that happened, all she could see in her dreams were fractured glimpses of reality, mixed with visions of madness fit to make the mind weep and the heart break. After those dreams, Tara inevitably woke shivering, covered in her own sweat.


Part of it was the smell, the antiseptic scent sharp and bitter, and only just hiding the inlaid smell of human misery and death. It was a smell that Tara now permanently associated with some of the worst moments of her life. The time the scoobies had spent in the hospital after the death of Buffy's mother certainly hadn't helped the situation.


Despite all that, despite every bad memory that came surging to the surface to bedevil her, despite the sick sensation that clawed at her vitals at the thought of one of her friends being here, Tara didn't show one bit of it. I have to be strong, I have to be brave. They need me to be strong, they all do.


She sat in the waiting room with all of the other scoobies, Willow close beside her, clutching at her hand like it was a life preserver, and she a drowning woman. The sudden nature of the attack on Anya had served to drive away the recent wedge that had come between them, as if both women had realized the futility of allowing their argument to derail what happiness they could find together.


Dawn and Buffy sat on a couch opposite the two witches. Buffy was staring into space with a blank expression on her face, but her arms still rubbed soothing circles on her sister's back as Dawn huddled into her shoulder. Buffy blames herself for this. She blames herself for what happened to Giles, and now she's blaming herself for what happened to Anya.


Giles sat perched on the edge of a lounge chair, somehow giving the impression that he was ready to leap to his feet at a moments notice, despite the fact that he was polishing his glasses fiercely, and had been doing so for the last twenty minutes straight. Giles blames himself too. Goddess, we're all riding on the blame train today.


Xander wasn't sitting. At Tara's urging, he had tried to sit and wait quietly, but he had only lasted five minutes before he had leapt to his feet and resumed pacing. Tara didn't try to convince him again. She realized that Xander had to keep moving, to give himself the illusion that he was doing something, anything. In Xander's mind, whether or not he realized it, that was better than just sitting and waiting. But that's all we can do.


Xander's head turned sharply, and Tara noticed that he had caught sight of a doctor heading towards them. Willow noticed at the same time and sprang to her feet as if spring-loaded. The rest of the scoobies followed suit and swarmed towards the approaching doctor in a fashion similar to a ravenous horde of locusts.


The doctor, who looked so tired and harried that Tara felt it was impossible not to feel sorry for him, met their flurry of questions with remarkable patience and understanding.


'Well, Miss Jenkins is pretty banged up, but she's going to be ok. She's sustained a mild concussion, a broken wrist and a few cracked ribs, bruising and some minor electrical burns. But we would like to keep her in overnight for observation.”


“What exactly happened to her, doctor?” Giles asked. Now that the watcher knew that Anya would be alright, his attention had turned to what had caused Anya's injuries in the first place. Giles had his suspicions, but he wanted to keep them to himself for the present.


“I can't rightly say,” replied the doctor, somewhat evasively. “The police might have more details for you.” Well, he's obviously worked in Sunnydale long enough to stop asking questions, Tara thought to herself as Giles strode in the direction of the two uniformed cops the doctor had indicated.


“Can I see her?” Xander demanded, similar requests from the other scoobies following right after.


The doctor first inquired as to the exact nature of their relationship with Anya, which resulted in an overlapping cavalcade of replies of 'friend' and 'family'. Xander clinched the deal with his less than accurate claim to be Anya's fiancé, and the doctor agreed to let them all visit for a short period of time.


As she walked hand in hand with Willow towards Anya's room, Tara felt herself becoming even more swept up in memories of visiting her mother. It was almost as if her vision were doubled, simultaneously seeing this hospital, here and now, while overlapped over it was the hospital where her mother had slowly wasted away. It was an all-together eerie experience.


Willow glanced towards her partner, alerted to Tara's troubled state of mind by the tension that vibrated through their linked hands.


“Baby, are you alright?” Willow asked in a hushed voice. The atmosphere of the hospital was getting to the redhead as well.


Tara shot a grateful smile at Willow in reply and nodded. “Being here is just stirring up some old memories.”


Willow nodded in instant understanding, and gripped Tara's hand more firmly, determined to do whatever she could to make this easier for the woman she loved. Finally, they reached the room, and joined all the other scoobies in huddling around the bed where Anya lay.


“Anya, are you ...” Xander began anxiously, trying to take his ex-fiancé by the hand. Anya, however, was having none of that, and yanked her hand back cantankerously.


“This is all your fault, Xander Harris,” she snapped.


Xander gaped in disbelief. “What? How ... how is this my fault? I didn't do anything!”


“You got me involved with Buffy, Giles and the rest of you. You with your pleasantly shaped body, and .... and that little trick you do with ...”


“Ahn!” Xander begged, red faced as the other four women in the room began to regard him with varying degrees of amused interest or mild discomfort. “Can we please skip ... the stuff we used to do, and get back on to how exactly what happened to you is my fault?”


“Well, if I hadn't gotten involved with you, I never would have tried to stop him!”


“Stop who, Anya?” Willow asked tentatively, wary of turning the focus of Anya's fury upon herself by accident.


“Who do you think?” Anya grumbled. “This new bad guy you only told me about yesterday!”


“He ... he did this to you?” Xander asked, and Tara was instantly worried by how flat his voice had become.


“No, Xander. I decided it would be fun to stick a fork in an electrical outlet just to see what it would be like to be struck by lightning!”


Xander's jaw clenched and his hands formed white knuckled fists, and Tara was positive it wasn't from Anya's barb. Goddess, he's going to do something stupid. I know I might, if it were Willow lying in that bed.


Turning on his heel, Xander strode for the door, but Buffy stepped into his path and gently laid one hand on his chest to retrain his forward momentum.


“Xander, stop,” Buffy urged.


For a few seconds, it was if Xander hadn't even heard her. He had stopped moving, but other than that, it was as if he were lost in his own little world. “What?” he finally asked through gritted teeth.


“You're going to go and do something stupid ... well, stupider than usual, like storming out there looking for payback and getting yourself killed.”


Xander stared at Buffy, and she almost winced at the pain in her friend's normally jovial eyes. “What else am I supposed to do?” he asked, and his voice quietly begged Buffy to give him a purpose, something, anything to do.


“You're supposed to go back over to Anya and keep her company. You're supposed to cater to her every whim, and make her forget just how close she could have come to dying. Use this time to try and get her to forgive you. It's not like she can just get up and leave.” Buffy stepped closer to Xander and stared intently into his eyes. “We will stop this guy, Xander. I promise you.”


Tara noted that Xander was trembling slightly, and reached out to take him by the shoulder. “Xander? Come on, Anya needs you here, with her.” She turned to Anya with a silent request in her expressive eyes. “Right, Anya?”


Anya scowled, but there was relief in her eyes. “Yes, alright. I don't want you to go, Xander.”


“You don't?” he asked, surprised.


“No,” answered Anya, sounding irritated by the admission. “I want to hate you Xander Harris, but I can't seem to keep it up at the moment. So I don't want anything to happen to you.”


“Ahn ...”


“Just give me time though, and I'm sure I'll be able to see you dead in a ditch at the side of the road and not care a bit.”


“Oh.” Xander deflated somewhat at this, but he still returned to sit at Anya's bedside.


“Anya, do you know why he attacked you?” Dawn asked, and Tara almost jumped. She's been so unusually quiet tonight, that I actually forgot she was there.


“Oh, he was shopping at the Magic Box,” Anya blithely replied.


“What did he buy?” Willow inquired. “Do you remember? Because that could be useful in letting us know what he's planning. Did he actually pay, or did he just ... ya know, zap and dash?”


“No, he payed. Quite a lot actually. He bought all sorts of things; herbs and spell ingredients, amulets, books, the whole nine yards.” Anya's face screwed up. “What does that mean, anyway? The whole nine yards of what?”


The entire group looked at each other with a variety of blank looks, before Willow spoke. “Umm, I don't think we actually know that means. Maybe Giles will?”


“Where is he, anyway?”


“Oh, Giles is asking the cops what they knew about the attack,” Buffy answered, and grinned wryly. “I'm fully expecting the usual 'gang on PCP' party line response.”


“Does anyone actually buy that explanation anymore?” Tara wondered out loud, and Willow smiled and leaned up against her.


“So ... what, he actually paid, and then just attacked you for the hell of it?” queried Dawn.


“Hmm? Oh no, Dawn. I attacked him.”


The room went deathly silent, as everyone stared at Anya in disbelief.


You attacked him?” Buffy finally asked. “Why'd you do that?”


“Because he was attacking my friends, Buffy. Why else would I?” Anya said it as if her reaction had been the most normal thing in the world.


“But Anya, you're just a human! Why did you think you could take him on by yourself?”


“Sure, I am now. Again.” The final word was muttered bitterly under her breath, and Tara's own breath caught in her throat. Goddess, she didn't ...


“Anya? You've been a human for more than three years now,” Xander stated in confusion.


“Oh ... yeah, sure.”


“Anya, when did you ...” Tara hesitantly began, but her voice trailed off, unsure of how, or even if she could continue.


“When did I what?” Anya asked cautiously. Then she saw the realization in the blonde witch's eyes, and Anya scowled. “You really are annoyingly perceptive at times, Tara.”


“I'm missing something here, aren't I?” Buffy asked, peering back and forth between Tara and Anya.


“There's something to miss?” Xander added cluelessly.


“Anya is a vengeance demon again,” Tara quietly declared.


“I was a vengeance demon again,” Anya grumbled. “The bastard destroyed my pendant, and I'm back to being human. Again.”


“You became a vengeance demon again?” blurted Dawn, her face equal part confusion and excitement. “How'd that happen?”


“Oh, let me see. What was it? It just might have been being left at the alter, having my heart ripped out and a jig danced on top of it until it was smeared into the carpet. It might have been that,” Anya grated, with a venomous glare in Xander's reaction. Xander had the rare good sense to keep his mouth shut, and just smiled weakly. It was the sort of smile a dying man gave the lion about to eat him.


“Anya, why didn't you just wish that his head exploded ... I mean the bad guy here, not Xander,” Buffy asked, apparently un-phased by Anya's brief return to the 'vengeance fold'. Or, if she was, the Slayer was managing to keep her concern hidden beyond Tara's ability to discern it.


“Buffy, if I could make wishes on my own behalf, don't you think a great many misfortunes would have befallen Xander? Like say ... all his hair falling out and his face being covered with pus weeping sores?”


Xander blanched, his face going almost as white as the sheets on Anya's hospital bed.


“Right,” Buffy replied. “Thanks for the mental image by the way.”


Anya apparently decided to take Buffy's comment as a complement. “You're welcome.”


“So, because you were a demon, you thought you could just .. what, beat him up?”


“I am ... was a lot stronger in my demon form,” Anya clarified. “I thought I could take him, but he turned out to be even more powerful than I thought. He hit me so hard that before I could even think of teleporting away, he'd destroyed my pendant.”


“Great. Just what I wanted to hear. Xander, you'll stay here tonight?” Buffy asked, being careful to voice it as a question rather than an order.


“Why does he have to stay?” complained Anya vociferously.


“Because I don't want anyone on their own until we deal with little Mr Lurks-a-lot,” Buffy replied, and Anya grudgingly acquiesced. “Right, starting tomorrow, we put our butts in gear. We need to find out who this guy is, what he wants, and how I'm going to stop him.”


Buffy paused, and drew herself to her full height. Even if that wasn't especially impressive, the conviction in her voice, and the fire in her eyes more than made up for it. “This guy wants to go after my friends and family? Then he's going to find out just how bad an idea that is.”


**********


It was early morning before I felt secure enough to move from my place of concealment. For more hours than I cared to count, I had sat and watched the Summers house. I had seen them return, minus Xander, from the hospital where I assumed they had been visiting Anya.


Wrapped in my ever present glamour, I had lurked, watched and waited. Through well lit windows, I had witnessed them eating, watched them discuss what was no doubt my actions. I watched as Buffy left on her nightly patrol, and was still watching as she returned hours later.


And still I waited, as patient as the serpent that waits until the final moment to strike, when it's prey has no chance to escape. Finally, I was sure that they were all asleep, and I was free to act.


I stalked around the perimeter of the house where Willow lived, around and around, constantly moving in a similar fashion to a shark. To stop was to die. Reaching out, I brushed one hand through the air a hair's breath from the ward surrounding the house.


The ... taste of the magic, the sense of it in the back of my skull, wasn't familiar, which meant that it wasn't Willow's handiwork, nor was it Giles'. Which only left the other witch. Tara Maclay. The name echoed in my head as I thought it. A name as familiar to me as my own, and yet, I did not truly know her. I will have to rectify that situation in the near future.


Still, the witch's work was impressive. The ward she had raised was simple, true, but the most effective spells often were. It wouldn't stop my crossing it, but that was never its intention. If I crossed this invisible 'line in the sand' ... well, lets just say I might as well signal my approach with a marching band, and air horns sounding with each footstep.


I could break the spell, but that would be almost as bad. Even if Tara did not sense the severing of her own handiwork, and there was no guarantee that I could prevent her from doing so, she would inevitably discover its destruction. This was supposed to be a covert incursion. I had made too many mistakes of late, left too many traces of myself behind for the 'scoobies' to gather up like crumbs.


Why they refer to themselves by the name of a cowardly cartoon canine is beyond me. They might as well call themselves the imbecilic do-gooders. It fits just as well.


I scowled. For all the time I had spent dreaming of this moment, all the time I had spent plotting and planning, the reality of the situation was not going as smoothly as I had anticipated. To be honest, everything keeps turning to shit. It was as if the closer I came to achieving my goals, the worse my control got, such that I was careening from one disaster to the next.


Not only do they even know of my very existence now, but they undoubtedly perceive me as a threat. Given their natures, they can do little else but interfere in my designs. Why can't anything just work the way it is supposed to?


Shaking my head, I dismissed these thoughts. They would not help me, and I had bigger fish to fry. Starting with how to penetrate their defenses unnoticed. At least this ward is the only barrier they have raised. A decade spent dodging repeated assassination attempts has given me considerable skill at spotting more mundane traps, and I couldn't detect any here.


Doesn't mean they aren't there, but I can't let that chance interfere with what I must do. If I am detected ... well, I'll deal with that if it happens. Now, how am I ... ah. Of course.


I stopped now, and dropped awkwardly into a cross-legged position, hampered somewhat by my injured leg. Once I had raised the field of silence, I rested my hands, palms upright, on my knees and slipped into a trance.


Unbidden, my lips began to murmur in a half heard chant. The language I spoke wasn't even remotely human, the words slippery and sibilant on my tongue. I felt the power rise in me, quickening ever faster as the pace of the chant likewise increased.


As I felt the power burgeoning inside me build to a rumbling crescendo, the chant ended, and my transformation began. My skin, bones, organs, even my clothes all grew soft, fluid and malleable. Then I began to pull apart. With each passing second, I divided, over and over, my awareness splitting into a myriad number of parts as the metamorphosis swept inexorably through me. I became ... something else, something ... other.


Then, finally, the change was complete. I ... no ... we crumbled, what had once been a human body dissolving into a swarming mass of insects. We were legion, but we were of one mind, in many bodies. We spread out, scattering until we covered an area several feet in size running against the boundary of the witch's barrier.


The theory was relatively simple. Tara's barrier was designed to detect the presence of magically endowed creatures. The stronger the magic coursing through their bodies, the more likely the witch's ward was to detect them.


Broken down as we were into this ... reverse gestalt state, our magical energies should prove dissipated enough that we could cross the barrier without alerting the witch to our presence. Gradually, by ones and twos, individual parts of us began to cross the barrier. Approximately fifteen minutes later, our final part crossed and we swarmed together once more into a seething, insectoid mass. We ended the spell, and began to reform into our previous, singular form.


Once both my consciousness and physical form had reformed, I fell to my knees as a racking cough ripped through me. I spat a thick, sticky wad of congealed blood onto the lawn, and wiped my lips with a trembling hand. It is getting worse. But on the plus side, my plan seems to have worked, since they haven't all rushed out, armed for bear.


Once I had sufficiently recovered my faculties, I called forth my seekers, and sent them into the house to confirm that all of the scoobies were asleep. It would somewhat negate the point of all this stealth if I were to step inside just in time to be decapitated by Buffy, simply because she was getting a late night snack.


The sprites returned swiftly, and buzzed in my ear that all of the house's occupants were soundly sleeping. Let's just make sure of that, shall we? I limped to the front door, and removed a small pouch I had prepared earlier from an inside pocket of my jacket. Tugging loose the tie holding the bag closed, I upended the pouch into the palm of my other hand.


“Morpheus, god of dreams, hear this humble supplicant's plea,” I whispered. “Grant the gift of your power to my cause, and bind mine enemies within the snares born of their own minds.”


Being careful not to inhaled any of the glistening powder, I raised my hand to my lips and gently blew. The powder billowed out like a miniature sandstorm and crept silently beneath the closed door. I gave the spell a few minutes to be sure that it had taken effect, then unlocked the front door with a wave of my hand.


For several minutes, I stood just inside the door, reaching out with every sense at my disposal. Every mind I briefly touched was tightly bound in slumber, wrapped even more deeply in dreams. Nothing short of an explosion would wake any of them now.


Crouching, I retrieved another pouch, and tipped it's contents onto the floor. A full score of small, gleaming, metallic balls rolled from the pouch. Passing a hand over them, I activated the magical constructs with the tiniest flicker of power.


Each ball, looking not unlike a tiny, steel marble, suddenly shifted as they awoke, and handfuls of tiny, multi-jointed legs grew from each one. As I returned to my feet, the constructs scurried away into the house like a small army of man-made spiders. Each spider knew it's place, and scuttled there swiftly, scaling walls and furniture alike with ease. As each of the constructs reached its preassigned destination, their legs burrowed into the walls, and their camouflage fields activated.


Slayer Central is wired for sight and sound. Now, I will be able to see and hear everything that goes on in this house.


Finally, I looked at the staircase leading upstairs. With a nervous flutter in my stomach, I limped forward and started to climb upwards. Soon, I found myself standing outside the door where she lay, and I slowly laid a trembling hand against its surface. She is there, just on the other side of this flimsy barrier. So close, so very close.


I turned the doorknob and gradually pushed the door open, my heart thundering in my chest as I stepped through. I blinked, and found myself standing at the foot of her bed with no memory of how I came to be there. I was moving on autopilot as I was swept up in the moment.


I stared at her face, lit by the gentle moonlight sifting through a gap in the curtains. My eyes hungrily devoured her, this woman whose very existence had driven my every thought. She was the reason why I was here, why I had left a trail of corpses behind me for the past twenty years. She was the reason I was a bitter and twisted creature, a shell of the man I could have once been. She was why I remade myself as a monster.


And now, after so many years, so many hardships and sacrifices, she was within touching distance. All I had to to do, was reach out and ...


I snatched back the hand that had been reaching towards Willow. No. Not yet. Not now. There is still so much I have to do before I finally finish this. Before I can finally rest. My lips curled back from my teeth in a ghastly rictus, a hideous parody of a triumphant smile.


I straightened to my full height, and extended my hands towards where Willow lay cuddled with Tara. I let the ever present power inside me bubble to the surface, and harnessed it to my implacable will. I wove the raw power with word and thought, and shimmering tendrils of energy curled from my spread fingers.


Twisting like fingers of fog in a light breeze, the magic reached forward and caressed the bare skin of my target like an insubstantial lover. Then, when it seemed as if that was all those fingers would do, they struck, plunging into her, through her, weaving themselves into her very being. And all the while, Willow Rosenberg slept on, completely unaware.


To be continued ...
Last edited by Darth Pacula on Thu Nov 17, 2005 12:09 am, edited 2 times in total.
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Re: New Fic - At Any Cost. (Updated 21 Sep)

Postby spells42 » Wed Sep 21, 2005 5:05 am

Paul, maaaate! Sorry I missed fb on the previous update. Hope you're feeling better? Nasty stuff that treatment.

Both updates are terrific. This story just keeps getting better and better. Seems to me you've gradually developed different threads, of W&T, the Scoobies, Xander & Anya, and TUE, and now you're weaving them all together into a pattern we can't see yet. Dammit, I hate it when an author has me puzzled like this. Ummm, no actually I love it - I'm just really interested to find out what's going on (ie I want to read the rest of the story right NOW).

You're evil, you know that? And that ending! Was TUE sending more black magic to Willow, or putting a spell on her? Is she gonna know she's been hexed? Is TUE gonna remember to turn into hundreds of bugs (ewwwwww, btw) to get out, or is he gonna set off the *alarm*? Am I gonna stop asking silly questions and just read the story to find out? Yep.

Keep up the good work, Paul.

Anne
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Re: New Fic - At Any Cost. (Updated 21 Sep)

Postby grimlock72 » Thu Sep 22, 2005 4:32 am

Good question there... will he trip the alarm on the way out.. common error that :)

Would be fun to squash a few of those flies and see what re-assembles :devil :devil

Several traces were left of this break-in anyway, a huge spat of bloody cough on the lawn. Now if that could be properly analyzed you got a good chance there is specific (bad) magic in there. Also the spot where TUE cast his 'split' spell should be easily found, as it should positively reek of dark magic.

Willow might have slept through what read suspiciously as a rape but that's not to say she won't notice anything when she eventually does awake. Come to think of it, they might all seriously oversleep their waking call due to the sleep spell.

Buffy is all with hollow threats and speeches I see. "This guy wants to go after my friends and family? Then he's going to find out just how bad an idea that is."... ooooh... aren't we impressed. I'm sure TUE is shaking in his boots right now... NOT. They don't know didle squat about TUE, I've pretty much given up on guess who he is as all possible candidates don't fit in my opinion (Xander primairly, magic is a problem there).

Clearly TUE likes Willow, which again brings us to the question of why he let Tara live (as she is obviously competition) ? Emotions in bad guys are a good thing, causes mistakes :) I wonder how much effort/magic that fly trick cost TUE by the way, must be a fairly heavy spell. With any luck he'll kill himself doing such heavy spells before hurting the scoobies for real.

Btw. Paul are we supposed to recognize/know "Hyriault" by name? It doesn't ring any bell for me ??

For some reason I can't see those camera spies being undetected for long. Once either Willow or Tara figures out mr TUE has been in the house they ought to do a thorough sweep of the house. Heck, Willow should have an allergic reaction to those devices assuming they use 'dark' magic to cover themselves :)

I do get a sense of urgency from this story, hard to explain but I want to yell at the scoobies to get some proper research done. Did TUE really expect to be unnoticed ??

Speaking of research, not much attention was paid to the shopping list of TUE at the Magic Shop now was there? I would think that list pretty much spells out what he wants to do, unless he bought decoys as well... which I doubt.

Edited to sneak in some Warren/TUE observations..
Much as TUE might dislike it, his behaviour pattern is becoming more and more similair to Warren Meers. Including foul-ups of initially good plans :). Maybe thats a habit of all psychopaths ??

What I noticed this update; (1) pining after a woman, resorting to force to get said woman, (2) the microphone/video bugs, (3) grand schemes + bad execution.

It also bugs me that TUE's plan is likely so warped that I can't guess at it :lol.

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Re: New Fic - At Any Cost. (Updated 21 Sep)

Postby Darth Pacula » Mon Sep 26, 2005 2:21 am

G'day all, and welcome to the latest installation of my little ditty. Well, maybe not a ditty, because that's a song isn't it? Ah, screw it. Replies first, then the update.


spells42 - Anne maaate! Don't sweat missing feedback. At least you're giving me some, which is always fun. Yep, radiation therapy is crappy, but hey, I don't have cancer any more so I won't bitch too much. I also only have half my original tongue, but you don't want to hear about that.

You think this drivel is getting better and better? Great, that means I have to keep upping my game, damn you! :-D

Yes, I know I'm evil. I've been saying so for the whole story, so you shouldn't be surprised. :devil

Ah, now what was TUE doing to Willow? It's not going to be immediately obvious, so you'll just have to keep guessing.

I got an ewww! Yes! Victory! The bug trick was something I was quite proud of. I thought about doing mist, ala Dracula, but this seemed much more gross and sinister.

I will try to keep it up, but this isn't work for me. This is fun.

Hoo roo, Anne.


grimlock72 - Ahh, Grimmy. Yes, Anne's question was a good one, but I can't make it too easy for the good guys.

I actually toyed with the idea of one of the bugs getting killed by Miss Kitty Fantastico before TUE reformed, and having him come back with a chunk missing out of his ear, but it kind of fell by the wayside.

The bloody spit gets addressed briefly in this update, ( I put this bit in especially for you btw ) but I'm not sure about sensing where dark magic has been cast. They are on a hellmouth after all, and that probably muddies the water a bit.

Yeah, that bit at the end did kind of read like a rape didn't it. I didn't mean for that to happen when I wrote it, but that's the way it came out. Bleh.

Yes, TUE is allowing his feelings to cloud his thinking, such as it is. Why didn't he try to take out the competition in the form of Tara? Well, he does have a reason, but he's not telling just yet.

Ahh, I would be surprised if anyone recognized Hyriault, since it is a product of my own fevered imagination. I needed a demon dimension, and I didn't want to use any of the ones mention by name in Buffy or Angel, so I just made my own.

As for detecting the cameras, I'm not planning to make them noticed for a while. The issue of being hidden by dark magic ... well like I mentioned earlier they are on a hellmouth, so you've got a pretty much constant dark vibe to the place. Plus, who says the magic concealing them is dark. Does the nature of a spell depend on who casts it, what it does, or the spirit in which it is cast?

I try to give the scoobies a kick up the research ass this update, so maybe you will be able to stop yelling at them. Maybe TUE didn't expect to get noticed this fast, and maybe he just wanted it that way. Our desires always seem to color our expectations.

Okay, good point with the comparisons. He'd still hate the idea. Hey, maybe that's how they will finally deal with him? Will and Tara can walk up, say 'You're exactly like Warren" and watch his head explode. :lol

Did you say you're bugged? If you're starting to turn into a whole bunch of insects, I must be better than I thought. :-D

Thanks, Grimmy.


**********


Title: At Any Cost


Author: Paul aka Darth Pacula


Distribution: Knock yourself out, just ask first. ( That means yes if you're not sure )


Feedback: Go nuts. The more the merrier. Unless you're all wanting to roast me at the stake that is. Then, less is more.


Disclaimers: Nope, still don't own anything.


Summary: A powerful, ruthless and unstable figure begins to meddle in Willow and Tara's lives, with unforseen consequences.


Rating: PG-13, maybe R at times for a touch of violence.


Timeline: Well now, it starts off just before the end of Seeing Red, but will contain elements of an altered Season 7.


Spoilers: Err ... pretty much the entire show. If you haven't seen any of it yet, and actually want to, you just aren't trying hard enough.


Thoughts are in italics.


The story so far ... The scoobies are trying to come up with a plan to find out more about their new big bad, but find out Anya was attacked. They rush to the hospital, where they find out about Anya's brief return to the vengeance fold. Meanwhile, the aforementioned big bad has managed to sneak into the Summers house while our heroes were asleep, magically bugged the house and done something decidedly not good to Willow ...


Part 8.


Tara's return to consciousness was an unusually drawn out affair the next morning. Normally, she awoke near instantly, switching states from sleep to awake without pause. This morning, however, Tara had to struggle to wake up, a sensation not unlike what she imagined swimming through liquid tar felt like.


Her eyes finally fluttered open, tired and gummy from sleep, and Tara yawned deeply. Stretching her body to it's limits, Tara allowed herself to luxuriate in the simple pleasure of movement. There's no telling how many moments of pleasure we'll have in the coming days, so I'd better take it where I can find it.


Running a hand through her sleep tousled hair, Tara glanced drowsily towards Willow. Her everything lay sprawled face down, limbs akimbo and bedsheets tangled about her slender frame. She must have had one doozy of dream to get that active last night. I didn't even notice her tossing, so I must have been more tired than I felt. I just hope Will had a good dream ... maybe of the racy variety, starring yours truly.


Tara grinned at the thought, and slowly rolled out of bed, being careful not to wake her still-slumbering partner. Stretching and yawning again, the blonde slowly made her way to the bathroom, disrobed and climbed into the shower.


Standing beneath the constant warm spray, Tara allowed the hot water to caress her muscles, easing the tension still left over from yesterday from her body. She allowed herself to drift away, her mind blank and peaceful. It was only when the hot water began to run out that Tara guiltily realized exactly how long she had been standing there.


She hurriedly turned off the shower and stepped out, hoping that none of the house's other occupants would be too upset with her for using up the lion's share of the hot water. Though Buffy's done it herself enough times, Tara thought with a wry grin.


Once she was finished in the bathroom, Tara returned to her bedroom to dress. To her surprise, Willow was still soundly asleep. In fact, she hadn't even moved an inch. Tara shrugged, deciding to let her lover sleep in as late as she needed to. It's the weekend, so we don't have any classes today, and she deserves some time to rest, given everything that's been happening of late.


Tara pressed a soft kiss to Willow's head and started downstairs. Even as she was walking past the door of the younger Summers, it swung open to reveal a bleary eyed Dawn, covering a yawn with one hand. The teenager perked up considerably at the sight of Tara.


“Ooh, are there going to be pancakes?” Dawn chirruped, sounding far happier than she looked. “Er ... by which I mean good morning, Tara.”


“Good morning, Dawnie,” Tara replied, hugging Dawn warmly. “There might be pancakes. The forecast last night definitely said there was a chance of pancakes this morning, so if you're lucky ...”


Dawn beamed, and scurried off to the bathroom, while Tara made her way downstairs, noticing as she went that Giles was still asleep on the couch, a massive tome propped open on his chest. She didn't see any sign that Buffy was awake either. Looks like we were all more tired than we realized. I guess the stress must be getting to all of us.


Dismissing the issue of the mass sleep-in from her mind, Tara started work on breakfast.


**********


Buffy stifled yet another yawn, and lazily scratched her butt, too tired to worry about the less-than ladylike nature of her actions. Bending over, she scooped up the morning paper from the lawn, and turned back to lurch back inside.


The Slayer paused as something caught her eye. Rubbing sleep from her eyes, she focused on a stained patch of the lawn, and moved cautiously closer. She crouched down beside the ... whatever it was and took a hesitant sniff.


Buffy's face instantly screwed up in distaste as she recognized the scent of blood. Eww. Please tell me Spike didn't get drunk and puke blood on my front lawn again. What the hell was I ever thinking?


Shaking her head in disbelief at her own past actions, Buffy stood, fetched a nearby hose, and proceeded to spray the bloody detritus out of existence. Once she was satisfied every trace was gone, Buffy turned off the hose, and went back inside, her nose lifting appreciably at the smell of Tara's cooking pancakes.


**********


Exhaustion and agony fought a vicious war for dominance over my body. It was an all too common experience for me. For longer than I could remember, I had pushed my body to it's limits, refusing to sleep until I collapsed, refusing to stop even if every nerve screamed out in pain.


Peace, comfort ... these things were not for the likes of me. Not until I was done, until my self-appointed crusade had come to its conclusion. I could rest when I was dead, and burning in whichever hell finally managed to claim me.


I sat slumped on a stool in the basement of my new lair. The cave I had been using would still have it's purposes, but this ... this would be my sanctuary. Benches lined the walls, littered with the debris of multiple projects. Pride of place went to a series of multi-faceted crystals, which served as the receiver for the magical bugs I had placed in the Summers house last night.


I watched them as I worked, grinding herbs in a mortar and pestle, allowed the flowing banter they indulged in to wash over me like warm water. To some, the scene in their kitchen would be one of unmitigated chaos, with multiple threads of conversation and affectionate arguments all going at once.


To me, it was soothing, a cool balm that eased the pain of my existence. It served to remind me of what I had lost, what I was fighting for. I had once possessed that, a family, a place to belong, people who accepted me despite my many faults. Before the one person I loved the most was taken from me, before my world crumbled to ashes, before I betrayed and killed every last person that I ever cared about.


I checked the consistency of the herbs I was grinding, and once satisfied, I added them to the beaker bubbling above a Bunsen burner, stirring the herbs in with a steel skewer. Lowering the heat, I allowed the viscous concoction to gently simmer, and returned my attention to the scene of domesticity unfolding before me.


As I watched them, cooking, eating, cleaning, talking, all the scoobies were utterly at ease with one another's company in a way possessed only by a close family, whether one bound by ties of blood or by common cause. I felt an old, familiar ache in my heart, and memories of my life before flooded up.


The memories that swept over me were pleasant to begin with. Family meals, arguments over the most banal and ridiculous of subjects simply for the fun of it, the simple pleasures of everyday life. Then came my fifteenth birthday, and everything changed. Willow changed everything, and my inevitable fall into the abyss began.


I roused myself from thoughts of the uncountable acts of murder and mayhem that could be lain at my feet. They would assuredly haunt when I succumbed to sleep, so there was little point in torturing myself when awake. Checking the consistency of my potion, I removed it from the heat and poured it through a sieve with a small sponge in the bottom. A syringe inserted into the sponge extracted the concentrated potion, ready for use.


Rolling up one sleeve, I tied a section of rubber tubing about my bicep and began searching my mutilated skin for a suitable vein. The numerous scars from uncountable battles, and arcane runes and glyphs both tattooed and carved literally into my flesh made the job annoyingly difficult. Once I finally found a suitable vein and flicked it to readiness, I jabbed in the syringe without ceremony and depressed the plunger.


Discarding the syringe, I moved from the stool to the floor, and slipped a piece of leather wrapped wood between my teeth. I would inevitably end up on the floor anyway. The first spasm caught me unawares. I had been having to make the potion stronger and stronger as time passed, and the time it took to take effect was decreasing at an inverse rate. Sooner rather than later, it would stop working. So long as it buys me enough time to finish what I have begun ...


Coherent thought was lost to me as my spine bowed and every muscle screamed in agony. My entire body convulsed violently as the damage done to my internal organs by my overuse of magic began to regenerate. I fell into darkness.


**********


“Hey Tara, where's Will?”


Tara looked up at Buffy's voice, her lower lip caught between her teeth in worry. She had just been wondering the same thing. Sleeping in I can understand, but it's almost half-past eleven.


“She's sleeping in, Buffy,” the witch explained, hesitant to express her nebulous fears to Buffy without further cause. “I didn't have the heart to wake her this morning.”


Buffy raised one eyebrow in surprise, then shrugged. “Kinda late sleep in,” she mused. “But hey, she's earned her rest.”


“I was actually going to go and see if she's showing any signs of rising,” Tara replied.


“Don't do that on because of me, Tara,” Buffy replied anxiously. “If I get Willow kicked out of bed before she wants to, she will seriously kick my ass.”


Tara grinned at the thought of her decidedly petite girlfriend kicking anyone's ass, let alone her best friends. “I was going to wake her up anyway, Buffy,” she assured the Slayer. “I wouldn't want her to miss out on lunch as well as breakfast.”


“Well, if she asks, I had nothing to do with your decision. You never had the pleasure of meeting my cave woman persona, but believe me when I tell you a grumpy and sleep deprived Willow is a hundred times worse.”


“I think I know a few ways to soothe the savage beast, Buffy,” Tara replied with a wink and a cheeky smirk.


“I'm sure you do. If you do manage to rouse Will, tell her we'll be having a scooby meeting after lunch. Xander should be here with Anya by then, assuming they let her out today.”


Tara nodded her understanding, and made her way upstairs and into the bedroom she shared with Willow. As she caught sight of her partner, Tara felt her earlier tenuous fears strengthen as her heart sped up. A terrifying premonition slammed into her with the force of a speeding truck.


Willow hadn't moved. At all. She was still lying in exactly the same position that she had been in when Tara had awoken. That's not normal, not even close. No-one sleeps that soundly. Tara took another couple of steps closer, her pulse suddenly thundering in her ears like a herd of stampeding horses.


Goddess, is she even breathing? Please, no. Goddess ... please don't do this to me!


Tara lunged towards the bed and grabbed Willow by her bare shoulder. She dragged Willow onto her back, tears beginning to cloud her eyesight. Her heart skipped a beat when Willow's eyes snapped open, befuddled with sleep.


“Huh? Whazza ...” Willow mumbled, sounding a bit like a soprano version of Don Vito Corleone. Tara enfolded her lover in a tight hug, nearly weeping from relief now, as opposed to fear and panic.


“Tara ... baby?” Willow mumbled through a mouthful of Tara's long blonde hair. “I'm glad to see you too, but air ... kinda becoming an issue.”


“Willow ... are you okay?” Tara asked urgently, pulling back and holding Willow's face between her hands, peering fearfully into the green eyes that she adored. “Sweetie, are you alright?”


“Umm, yes?” Willow answered in between a series of enormous yawns. “Why wouldn't I be?”


“Y.. you slept so late and so deeply, that I ... I was afraid ... you hadn't moved at all Will. I got scared.”


“I'm sorry I scared you, baby,” the redhead replied in a contrite, albeit bewildered voice. “I slept in late? How late are we talking?”


Tara just looked pointedly at the clock-radio on their bedside table, and Willow's jaw dropped as she saw the time.


“Hoo boy, that late?” Willow uttered softly, amazed. She blinked as a sudden thought crossed her slumber befuddled mind. “I missed breakfast? Were there pancakes? I missed Tara-pancakes?”


The plaintive, childlike note in her lover's voice brought a sweet, lopsided smile to Tara's face. “If you're good, I could be persuaded to make you pancakes for lunch.”


“Oooh!” Willow cried gleefully, clapping her hands and wriggling like a playful puppy. “How good are we talking about? What can I do for you, my lady of sweet, tasty foodstuffs?” Willow's eyes darkened with a sudden heat, and one eyebrow rose archly. “Or would you prefer me to be bad? Because, for you, I can be a very naughty girl.”


Tara felt her breath catch in her throat, a warm, delicious heat blossoming inside her at her lover's pointed innuendo. Her answering smirk was equally lascivious in nature, even as she poked Willow in the shoulder.


“Sorry to disappoint you, sweetie, but you'll have to hold off on that thought,” Tara regretfully informed her partner. “Buffy's called a scooby meeting for after lunch, so we don't have time to further investigate your naughty side right now.”


“Phooey,” Willow pouted. “Stupid, inconsiderate evil, intruding on my snuggle time.”


Tara patted the redhead on the thigh and rose to her feet. “C'mon sleeping beauty. It's time to make the world a safer place.”


Mock grumbling beneath her breath, Willow clambered slowly to her feet. As she rose, the redhead swayed and almost fell. Tara grabbed her lover by the shoulders, steadying her uneven balance.


“Are you sure you're all right, sweetie?”


“Yeah, I'm just feeling kind of weird. Exhausted and achy, like I just ran a marathon or went ten rounds with a vamp. I guess I might be coming down with something.” Willow's smile was tired, but genuine as she took in Tara's concerned expression. “Don't worry, I'll take it easy, and I'll be fine. It's probably just the flu.”


**********


After lunch, which to Willow's everlasting delight consisted of pancakes for the redhead, everyone gathered in the dining room for what amounted to an impromptu council of war. Xander had arrived half-way through lunch, an irritable Anya in tow, and proceeded to blithely graze from everyone else's plate. When he had tried to take some of Willow's especially made pancakes, she had swatted him on the arm, hard, and glared daggers until her oldest friend fled in what she was fairly sure was supposed to be an imitation of abject terror.


Buffy had talked Giles into assuming 'defacto command' of the meeting, an arrangement that seemed to please both Slayer and Watcher equally. Even in her less than perfect condition, Willow was pretty sure that Buffy was glad to surrender the mantle of leadership that seemed to have fallen to her by default since Giles had been gone. Giles, on the other hand, seemed glad simply to feel needed.


“Well then,” Giles began, standing at the head of the dining table. “Lets start with everything that we know about our mystery man. Would anyone care to begin?”


“He's very strong, and very fast,” Anya stated. “Faster and stronger than any normal human could possibly be.”


“You believe he might be some kind of demon then, Anya?”


“That could be magical in nature, Giles,” interjected Willow. “I found this spell once to enhance your physical prowess, but it was ... kind of too icky for my tastes.”


“So he could be demonic in nature, or simply have increased his strength and speed through magic?” Willow nodded, and the watcher sighed.


“Well, that narrows things down, doesn't it?” Xander quipped. “He could be human, or he might not.”


“Thank you, Xander. Once again your uncanny ability to state the obvious has proved to be of absolutely no use of all. Unless you have something of actual consequence to add?”


“Well, if we're sure that this is the guy who gave us Warren-in-a-doggie-bag, and if what Will told us is true, it's not the first time this guy has tortured someone to death.”


“That ... that's actually rather astute, Xander,” Giles stated in a tone of surprise that wouldn't work wonders for Xander's self esteem. “Well done.”


“Gee, thanks Giles,” Xander drawled sarcastically. “See? My skills can amount beyond the repairing windows and acquiring donuts.”


“You guys think you could hold off on the meeting of the mutual admiration club until we're not under the threat of shadowy evil?” Buffy asked, smiling slightly at their antics.


“Umm ... when is that ever the case, Buffy?” interjected Tara from where she sat hand in hand with Willow.


“Good point.”


Giles coughed pointedly, then resumed speaking. “So, we still have no idea as to his origin, but we can be certain that he's isn't an entirely new player. One doesn't learn how to keep someone alive throughout extensive torture overnight.”


“Why did he kill Warren anyway?” Dawn piped up.


“He met him? Actually spoke to him for more than five minutes?” replied Buffy with a shrug. “He was a grade A jerk.”


“Actually, Buffy, Dawn has a valid point. Why would ... is anyone else sick on not knowing what to call him?” Giles complained, massaging his temple.


“How about You-know-who? Or Voldemort?” Dawn suggested, and Giles met her idea with a look of utter incomprehension.


“She means the villain from Harry Potter, Giles,” Willow informed the perplexed Watcher.


“Who?”


Dawn groaned and buried her head in her hands. Giles blinked, then resolutely forged onward. “Where was I? Oh, yes. If our mystery man ...”


“Or woman.” interrupted Anya.


“What?”


“He might actually be a she, Giles. Women are just as capable of being evil and vicious as men. I'm sick and tired of the stereotype that women ...”


“Anya,” Giles burst out, desperate to derail the ex-demon's rant before it had a chance to truly gather steam. “I've met him. So have you. And at the risk of sounding crude, he lacked certain physical characteristics, and possessed certain others that preclude his belonging to the fairer sex.”


Xander leaned in close to Willow. “What did he just say?” he whispered.


“He didn't have breasts, and he had a penis,” Willow translated. An appalled expression furrowed Xander's forehead.


“Giles, did you cop a feel of our new bad guy?”


“What!” Giles spluttered, face going red from embarrassment or fury; Willow wasn't sure as she tried desperately to smother a grin. “No! What ... why?”


“Giles,” Anya stated matter-of-factly. “Your questionable sexuality aside, this 'guy' is flinging around some serious glamour. He, or she could be hiding their gender simply to muddy the waters.”


“My questionable ... what?” muttered the appalled Watcher.


“Glamour?” Xander queried, bewildered. “Am I missing something again? Is this guy flinging around makeup, or fashion magazines, or something?”


“Glamour is another name for a form of illusionary magic, Xander,” Tara explained. “Anya just means that he ... or she, is using magic to conceal their appearance.”


“Not just that, Tara. I really had to work to work to remember him even slightly. It was if he was ... making my attention slide off him like water off a duck's bill.”


“That's water off a duck's back, Ahn.” Xander shrunk back apologetically as Anya glared ferociously at him.


“So ... are you saying he could just be walking about and people just ... don't notice him?” Buffy inquired, and Anya, Tara and Willow all nodded in confirmation. “Great. Just great.”


“So, if he was hard to notice ... how did he expect to get served in the Magic Box?” Dawn queried, and Anya blinked as if the thought had not occurred to her.


“Even better,” groaned Buffy. “Really powerful, and a little bit stupid. That combination always works out well.”


“Well, as much fun as that was, can we please get back to the subject at hand, so I can start repressing the last few minutes immediately?” Giles implored acerbically.


“Sure, Giles. Do you want a blow to the head to help with that?” Buffy offered jokingly.


“No thank you, Buffy. So, we can't be sure of his nature, or his gender, or his appearance, if what I saw was just another glamour. We can be fairly sure that he ...” Giles caught Anya's pointed glance and sighed. I can feel a migraine coming on already. “ Or she, is very skilled and powerful magically.”


“He's ruthless, and apparently intimately familiar with torture,” Willow added with a shudder.


“And he's after us specifically.” Everyone stared at Anya in shock, and the ex-demon shrugged. “What?”


“Why do you say that, Anya?” Giles asked cautiously, quietly dreading the prospect of Anya explaining the potentially unusual path her mind may have taken to arrive at that conclusion.


“I didn't. He did.” Anya scowled at the plethora of blank expressions that continued to confront her. “He didn't kill me when he had the chance. Giles either. We were both essentially helpless, and he'd didn't kill us. He actually told me that he wanted us, all of us, alive.”


“Great,” grumbled Xander. “We're a part of whatever his evil plot is. I feel so special.”


“What the hell is he up to, Giles?” Buffy demanded. “How are we supposed to stop him when we don't even know what he's trying to do, let alone what he looks like?”


“I'm afraid I have no idea, Buffy. His actions thus far seem to be somewhat random in nature, but may be part of some larger scheme whose scope we may not be able to discern at this point in time.”


“Which boils down to a big 'huh?' from the Watcher,” Xander added, making his own attempt at translating for the Englishman.


“We still have a few avenues to explore,” stated Willow, only just repressing the urge to yawn. Goddess, I am still so tired. “There's that bank robbery, I still have to hack in and find that crime scene report. And there's what he bought from the Magic Box, if we know that, Tara and I might be able to figure out what he's planning.”


“I don't think he took his list with him,” Anya stated happily, and Willow was slightly off put by the glint in the shopkeeper's eyes. She wants payback, Willow realized. “So that should be easy.”


“There's something else,” Giles pronounced, his tone flat. “He knows us. Me in particular.”


“Meaning?” Buffy queried.


“He called me Ripper.”


Buffy groaned. “Are you telling us this is another one of your buddies from back when you were in your tearaway rebel phase? Another Ethan Rayne?”


“Honestly, Buffy? I don't know. I didn't recognize him, and he didn't even look old enough to have been more than a child back then. But as we mentioned earlier, appearances aren't worth much when it comes to this individual. But ... I can't see anybody I knew back then attaining this level of power.”


“You said he knows us, Giles. What did you mean by that?”asked Tara, squeezing Willow's hand for comfort.


“He knows Buffy is the Slayer, and he mentioned Willow by name.” Tara's heart faltered at this, and her stomach suddenly felt as if was filled with ice. “Not only that, he knew other things. Things that it should have been impossible for him to know.”


“Things like what, Giles?” Willow asked, her voice shaky. She didn't like the idea of this guy knowing her name any more than Tara did.


“Things like the fact that I expected to be confronting you when I returned here ... and he knew about the trap.”


“Trap? What trap?” demanded Buffy.


Giles sighed, his expression like that of a young boy caught with his hand in the cookie jar. “The coven and I arranged a ... failsafe, in case I ... er ... failed to stop Willow.”


“What kind of failsafe are you talking about, Giles,” queried Willow, quietly proud that her voice didn't shake.


“If you tried to absorb the powers gifted to me by the coven, as he did, it was supposed to connect you to the true essence of magic, to reconnect you to life, to make you realize the harm you were ... would have been doing.”


“Oh.”


“Since we're still here, and not partying down to celebrate yet another apocalypse averted, I'm guessing your trap didn't work on him?” Giles looked at Buffy apologetically, and nodded.


“He knew about the trap, Buffy. He knew it was there, and he knew how to disarm it.”


“Couldn't he have just sensed it somehow, before he triggered it?” Tara offered.


Giles shrugged. “Maybe, Tara. But I got the impression that he was expecting it. And I can't explain how he could know that.”


“So, he's got an inside source somewhere?” Buffy asked, scowling.


“Perhaps.”


“Hey, who do we know who hates most of us, and would sell us out for fifty cents?” Xander growled.


“Spike wouldn't do that, Xander,” Dawn protested, glaring at him in reproach.


“Dawnie, you have no idea what he would do,” Xander replied with an oblique glance at a suddenly stone-faced Buffy.


Is there something going on there that I'm missing? Other than the whole Buffy having sex with Spike for months, and me not noticing because I was so wrapped up in my own problems, and goddess please stop my mind from going in that direction because I so don't want any kind of mental picture associated with that.


“I'll check out Spike,” Buffy grated, and the pointed glance she shot Xander was of the variety that could punch holes in rock.


“Buffy!” Dawn protested.


“Dawn, I don't think Spike has done anything like that, but we have to consider every possibility.” Buffy paused, taking a deep breath. “So ... Xander, can you and Anya check the Magic Box, see if you can find that list?”


“Xander can take a look at the damage and give me an estimate of how much it will cost to fix it,” Anya replied, as she and Xander nodded their agreement.


“Giles, you want to check in on your old buddies, the ones that aren't dead or in prison? See if any of them know anything about our uninvited guest. Then later, I want you to come with me to visit Jonathan and Andrew again. I think they might know more than they're letting on. Willow, you'll get to work on getting that crime scene report?”


“I'll get right on it,” Willow promised. I might need to inject mocha straight into my veins to stay awake, but I'll get right on it.


“Tara, since we're dealing with a bad guy with major mojo, maybe you should strengthen our defenses a bit more? Especially if he's coming for us personally.”


“I'll see what I can do, Buffy.”


“Okay, guys. Lets see if we can find out who this asshole is, and what he wants with us.”


**********


I stood upon a high bluff, overlooking a vast and desolate wasteland. As far as the eye could see, the landscape was barren and inhospitable, riven with craters and rifts, filled with bogs, quicksand and pools of acid. It was also covered with the bodies of the dead.


The battle had been the single bloodiest of the entire civil war. In the space of only ten hours hundreds of thousands had died. Demons for the most part, though both sides had found occasional use for those few humans found in Hyrialt.


By the day's end, my old master's largest and best trained army had been slaughtered, by a combination of sheer savagery, ruthless planning and bloody-minded inventiveness. On that day, I unleashed horrors previously undreampt off, and the land ran red with blood. It also ran green, black, yellow and any other number of colors. Demon blood wasn't restricted to the single, boring color like human blood was.


It was at once one of my greatest triumphs, and one of my worst memories. It was a place I had visited many times in my past nightmares, and would likely do so again. I stood alone on that bluff, and remembered the screams, the carnage, the stench of death on a large scale. The darkest part of my soul welcomed the memories, reveled in the destruction I had wrought. The fragments that remained of the person I had once been, screamed and wept.


“Hello, my child.” The voice swept over me, bathed me in still more memories. It was a warm voice, thick with peace and knowledge, with an underlying edge of power. It was the voice of someone I killed.


“Why is it I am not surprised to find you here? I ask wryly. To my surprise, I am telling the truth. Part of me has expected this ever since I killed him.


“You were always a quick study, young one. I suspect very little surprises you any more. That is a shame. What is life worth without a few little surprises to make it interesting.”


He speaks from behind me, but I do not turn around. If it were anyone else, and if this was not surely a dream, I would not allow a potential enemy access to my back. But this was my old master, and he was nothing if not honorable. He would not stab me in the back. He might send assassins against me, but he would not strike me down himself from behind. Besides, I had already killed him.


“On my world, the Chinese have a saying. 'May you live in exciting times'. It is not a complement, it is a curse.”


“Your meaning is, child?”


“My life is cursed enough already, old man. I don't need surprises to make things worse.”


“You would live your life without hope, then?” I smile bitterly at this comment. The old fool is still trying to save me. Has he forgotten already what I did to him?


“Hope is a lie that we tell ourselves to stave off despair,” I quietly tell him, my voice devoid of rancor; indeed, it is devoid of any significant emotion. “I neither need, nor want, hope. I have my cause, and that will suffice.”


“Even should you achieve that which you seek, young one, what will you do then? Your every thought is focused upon that one goal, but what lies beyond that?”


“Hell. Damnation. Eternal torment. You know, all the little things that make the afterlife worthwhile.” I muster a cold smirk at my own macabre quip.


“You can still change, my child. There is still time.” Here we go again. Didn't he learn the lesson from last time? “You are not beyond redemption.”


“There is no such thing as redemption, you old fool,” I snarl, spit flecking my thin lips with the force of my anger. “What we do cannot be undone, and to pretend that we can make up for it is a farce. There is no redemption for the likes of me.”


“What are you trying to achieve, if not to undo what has been done? You seek to ...”


“Be silent, you dead old fool! I know what it is I seek!” I spit the words like arrows, fast and hard. “It is you who doesn't know what it is I am trying to do.”


“I know enough to realize that it cannot end well, child. What you seek is wrong. It defies the natural order of things.”


“Fuck the natural order!” I bellow, my hatred of what was surging powerfully through me. “I defy it, as I defy fate, and destiny and any other pathetic little labels with which you try to herd me like cattle! I will change things, you old fool, even if I have to burn every trace of life from this wretched little world to do so!”


“What do you truly expect to achieve with your little vendetta, child?” asks the ghost, or hallucination, or whatever he is. No matter what he is, his voice is thick with sorrow. “She in whose name you do this would ...”


YOU WILL NOT SPEAK OF HER!” I howl, and the orange sky is riven by lightning from the force of my unreasoning fury. “Speak of her again, and ghost or nay, I will end you!”


My old master is quiet for a moment, and I sense him moving closer until he stands beside me, staring out over the bluffs edge. “As you wish, young one.” His voice is calm and measured, utterly unconcerned by my threat.


I find myself laughing, although there is little of merriment in my dry and hacking sound I produce. My master always seemed to have the knack to derail even the most childish of temper tantrums with naught but a few choice words. My mockery of a laugh devolves into a violent cough that flecks my lips with my own blood.


“You push yourself too hard, child,” he sadly informs me. “Even your power has limits.”


“I do what must be done, no matter what the cost, to me or anyone who gets in my way.”


He harrumphed in disapproval, but subsides without further comment. We stand there in companionable silence, staring out at the wasteland of which I was the main architect.


“This is an abomination,” he finally states, and I catch a glimpse of a shaking head in my peripheral vision. I dare not look directly at him, for fear of what I might see.


“War always is,” I finally reply.


“And yet, you are so good at it.”


I shrug. “Destruction comes naturally to me. I have been inclined towards it since before I was born. It's creation I have trouble with. Anything that is actually productive, actually.”


“There is still time for you to change,” he suggests, and I shake my head, amused rather than upset this time.


“Why do you still continue to try and save me?” I ask, actually curious to know the answer. “Have you forgotten how I killed you?”


“I have not. Even for me, dying is not such a frequent occurrence that it can be forgotten so soon.” He drifts into silence, and I shift my shoulders irritably.


“Well?” I demand.


“I can still see the potential for good inside you, my child. I would not see it smothered by your insane obsession.”


“I think you need your eyes checked, old man. What you see is but a shadow of who I once was, who I once might have become.”


He smiles, and I scowl. We come to a silent agreement to agree to disagree, and return to our respective observations of the battlefield.


“These children you plague with your schemes do not deserve this,” he states mildly, and I bare my teeth in a feral snarl.


“Oh, but they do. Willow especially. After all, she made me.”


To be continued ...
Last edited by Darth Pacula on Thu Nov 17, 2005 12:11 am, edited 2 times in total.
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Re: New Fic - At Any Cost. (Updated 26 Sep)

Postby grimlock72 » Mon Sep 26, 2005 3:20 am

Ok, so Buffy will never become a forensic detective... check. :)

It's still extremely frustrating to see the scoobies wander around without having a clue what happened the previous night. I find it strange (or dissappointing) that Willow doesn't feel violated or at least something gone wrong.

Anya might not be a VD anymore but she has a HUGE amount of knowledge and access to even more. That she wants revenge is good, hopefully she'll be smart enough not to attempt it at her own.

TUE's version of history sets the break-of point at him being 15 years old, that unfortunatly doesn't tell us much about Willow's age at that time. We already know TUE blames Willow for what he (there's no proper reason for a boy glamour, since he knows Willow's gay) has become, which says nothing about him being right/correct. Even if we assume Willow was also 15 at the time, that would be slightly before season1 Willow I believe. I was thinking about Amy there for a second, but she never liked Willow that much nor did she want to fight evil (same goes for Amy's mom, though age might fit there).

TUE knowing about the trap either points to the coven itself (enough power there to be interesting and they do fight evil), or some time-travelling. The latter makes it very hard to guess what TUE knows or who he is, if not impossible.

About Ethan Rayne not being powerfull enough; that is assuming one only uses his/her own power (innate). Dark magic like TUE uses can be forced/grasped, esp. on a hellmouth. Granted it's not healthy but that's another problem altogether.

TUE's reasoning and feelings are rather conflicting shall we say :). He blames Willow for becoming what he now is, which would point to hate... yet he seems to love Willow (well beyond the brotherly Xander-type love). Very confusing, could be a keypoint in whatever battle is coming up.

TUE says he was born to be evil, but I'm not sure how to value that. It's a phrase often used by people to deny their own ability to choose to do good or bad.

I still have the feeling the scoobies are moving waaaay to slow on this threat. The selection of magical capable demons/humans male who know Giles as 'ripper' isn't THAT big now is it? Paired with knowing Anyanka so well he would let her live.. should narrow it down. Though the time-warping theory breaks any guesswork down again.. :cry. I like puzzles, but this one doesn't have enough constraints to figure it out yet.

Having MKF catch on of those bugs would have been funny. I wonder if that would have been healthy for Miss Kitty though, eating Dark Magic Bugs :lol.

TUE's conversation with his old teacher (the one he killed in revenge, lets keep it simple) was interesting. I wonder if that was all in TUE's head or does he somehow speak to spirits as well? His line about killing everything to get what he wants speak about his crazyness. Clearly if you kill EVERYONE you can't possible get the one you want, there will be no one left! (reminds me a bit of an old computer war game, if you won you got a picture of a single little man exictedly jumping on top of a destroyed world shouting 'we won, we won').

TUE knowledge about a chinese proverb kind of excludes Xander from the guessing as well :lol.

There were some funny lines in this update as well, esp. in the first part:
"Oooh!" Willow cried gleefully, clapping her hands and wriggling like a playful puppy.
I like Willow happy :)

TUE/teacher did indeed remind me somewhat of StarWars, probably no coincidence ?? :lol

P.S. If Hyriault (pick an EASY name for a dimension next time, k?) is a HELL dimension what was TUE's appearantly good-guy teacher/master doing there having a peacefull kingdom and such??

Grimmy
"You hurt Tara," Willow said too calmly. "The last one who tried that was a god. I made her regret it."
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Re: New Fic - At Any Cost. (Updated 26 Sep)

Postby spells42 » Mon Sep 26, 2005 3:56 am

Paul
Sorry to hear about the cancer. The treatment is really hard to take, I know, my sister had cancer. Glad to know the treatment worked for you.

That was a good update, and nice and long too.

You've given us a mysterious effect of TUE's visit in the extreme tiredness affecting Willow and to some extent the rest of the Scoobies present in the Summers house that night. I have to admit to being worried by it.

Loved the Scooby meeting. They really don't have much to go on but they're still gamely giving it a try. LOL at the conversation flow from Willow's translation for Xander to Anya's comment about Giles 'questionable sexuality'. Poor Giles.

Then the nice long bit about TUE.... clues galore, but nothing that clarifies 'his' identity, just adding to the confusion. Evil, Paul. Still, interesting insights: TUE once had a family and was reminded of the affectionate bond while spying on the Scoobies breakfast; TUE's dream memory of annihilating his old master's army on Hyriault and the murder of same raising the question of why that was necessary to further his aim to .... do whatever it is he has in mind, get revenge? ... ; AND that comment re how Willow had 'made' him, which can be taken in a number of ways.

As you can see, I've been drawn into your story. I have to know what's behind it all, and how it turns out. Looking forward to the next update.

Anne
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Re: New Fic - At Any Cost. (Updated 26 Sep)

Postby LeatherQueen » Mon Sep 26, 2005 9:24 am

Wow... I know you continue to sprinkle clues to this person's identity through every update, but it is slippery and elusive. Just when I think I might know who it is, another clue lays that idea to waste. Argh! I am very impressed with your ability to keep us on our toes this way.

Another great update. I'm really looking forward to finding out just what the BB did to Willow.
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Re: New Fic - At Any Cost. (Updated 26 Sep)

Postby AntigoneUnbound » Mon Sep 26, 2005 6:23 pm

Hey Paul--First of all, I hope the recovery from the radiation is going as well as can be expected. I missed the earlier reference to it. I send good thoughts your way, good man.

OK, so I have a hunch who it might be but I won't say it here. I'll shoot you a PM, but I don't want you to confirm or deny. I wanna enjoy the story as it unfolds; I'm just interested in spinning a few ideas your way. That way you can either (a) marvel at my perspicacity or (b, the more likely option) chortle at my boundless idiocy. Either way, it's a fun night!

A snare born of their own psyches? (I know I don't have that literally, but that's the idea, I'm taking.) Whoa...I'm all about there being no worse terror than that which we create for ourselves.

What's with the lassitude in the Summers household; Willow, in particular? You created a wonderful scene of people just being a little...slow this morning. Hmm...

Tara, discerning as ever, realizes Anya's little Vengeance Reunion Tour, abbreviated as it was. I'm intrigued by Giles' interaction with everyone, esp. Buffy and Willow. In a sense, he abrogated his duty by leaving, and then returns imbued with the power to subdue Willow if necessary. Now, however, he's supposed to interact with them in a cooperative effort. One of the things that's always fascinated me w/ the Buffyverse is that people have to devote enough attention to their relationships to build and maintain trust and knowledge, yet they so often have to put explicit connection efforts on hold to deal with some threat. So Giles et al. have no opportunity to sit down and talk about all of this. They have work to do. Ah, but that work can only succeed if they trust each other. A conundrum, that...

I'm so enjoying this, Paul. Thanks for putting it out there.
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Re: New Fic - At Any Cost. (Updated 26 Sep)

Postby Patches » Tue Sep 27, 2005 9:48 pm

Hey Paul,

What a pleasant surprise. I’d read your feedback in Mary’s ATGB thread and when I saw this thread, thought I’d see what you’d started. WOW, let me add ‘started with a vengeance!’ I’ve been ploughing through little bits and pieces as I steal time (spot the Tomb Raider fan). This is a *great* read, Paul. I love the visual descriptors—very vivid, the character dynamics, ever-present low-level tensions, and the slow revelation of a most interesting BB. Paul, this story is like peeling an onion: complex layer upon complex layer crafted with great skill. I love the use of first person for the BB; it’s a great effect, pulling the reader right into the moment and locking everything in place. The narrative switches add vibrancy to the story that helps to kick up the angst. I like dark and broody stories, and am intrigued by your villain: vaguely familiar, but still unknown (a suspicion or two, though I have). Your descriptions of the BB are deliberately gender neutral; it’s as if the glamour spells work on the reader as well. We know what the BB is after, but we’ve yet to learn the ‘why,’ and I think the ‘why’ will be the most thrilling part to discover. Thanks so much for posting this piece. I look forward to more, and do hope you're well on the proverbial road.

Cheers!!
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Re: New Fic - At Any Cost. (Updated 26 Sep)

Postby Darth Pacula » Fri Sep 30, 2005 4:14 pm

G'day all. It's a lovely, warm spring day here in Brisbane, though when I woke up it looked like it was going to be wet and miserable. I doubt anyone wants to hear about the weather though, so on with the show.


grimlock72 - Yep, not going to be seeing Buffy Summers on CSI anytime soon. Why hasn't Willow figured out that something happened to her last night? Well, whatever it is TUE was doing to her ( Yes, I do know, but I'm not telling just yet :devil ) hasn't left any physical trace for her to notice.

Anya does want revenge for being made human again, but I don't think she'd be stupid enough to pull a Giles and go for it all on her own. Of course, being the evil bastard that I am, you never know. :devil

Yep, the age at which TUE's personal breaking point was reached isn't of much help in figuring out his identity, but then again I'm leaving so many conflicting clues that it's not supposed to be easy.

Yeah, conflicted is definately one way to sum up TUE. Bug shit crazy is another. Good point there about whether or not anyone can be born to be evil. It's my belief that you can be naturally inclined towards a certain end of the moral spectrum, but everyone chooses in the end, whether they realize it or not. Blaming it on events beyond your control is just a cop out.

You think the scoobies are moving slowly? Well, they are playing catch-up, and they just don't have enough information at the moment. That might change as things go on though. Or, it might not.

I'm not familiar with the game you mentioned, to my computer game geek shame, but you're spot on with the futility of such a phyric victory.

Glad you liked the humor, and who doesn't like a happy Willow? Aside from perhaps Joss and Co. I will leave her in a happy place, but I can't guarantee a smooth ride for our favourite witches. Hell, I can guarantee that they won't have a smooth ride.

Me intentionally put in a Star Wars reference? Would I do that? Hang on, part of screen name is the title of a Sith Lord, so I suppose the answer to that is a resounding 'hell yeah!'

You think Hyriault is a hard name? I was just following the standard conventions for naming sci-fi or fantasy worlds; make it sound wierd. :-D

Why was TUE's master in a hell dimension? Well, perhaps hell dimension is the wrong word. Think demon dimension instead and remember that just because you're a demon doesn't make you automatically evil.

Thanks for reading, Grimmy. It's always fun to read your thoughts.


spells42 - Thanks for your concern. I hope your sister's doing okay. Myself, I've been free of the the Big C since the end of '98 and the docs say if it was going to come back it would have done so by now. So I just have to deal with the lingering side effects.

Yep, the general malaise affecting the scooby household is supposed to be menacing. The unknown is usually scarier than the known.

Poor old Giles does cop a lot of flack from the others, but it's all said with love.

Ahh, yes. I am large with the evil. :devil Half the fun of this story is trying to piece together the puzzle that is the TUE, and I'm having a ball writing this.

Glad you're enjoying it, Anne. It's always good to hear from you.


LeatherQueen - G'day mate. Cool! I'm laying waste to stuff! That's very satisfying to my inner barbarian. I'm glad TUE's identity is elusive. It's meant to be.

What evil mojo is TUE working upon our poor hapless Willow? :devil Just you wait and see, my friend.


AnitgoneUnbound - G'day, Mary. Thanks for your concern. I'm doing well. I've read your PM and sent a reply winging your away across the electronic ether, completely free of confirmation or denial. And yes, either option will be fun. :lol

Yep, the fears that we make ourselves are always the scariest. You just have to look at phobia's for that. What's with the lassitude? Why, Mary are you trying to suggest that they're not just all tired? :devil

You're right about the strain between Giles and the rest of the Scoobies. He did skip out on them pretty much, but they haven't had the chance to properly deal with that yet. I may change that in the future. Hmm, you're giving me ideas ... Thanks for that.

Hey, I'm enjoying writing this, though it is starting to become something of an obesssion itself. Oh well, good thing I have no social life, huh?

Always grand to hear from you, Mary.


Patches - Well a big hello to you, Patches, and welcome. :wave I won't try to replicate Mary's habit of rhying your name, cause ... well I suck ass at poetry.

WOW, let me add ‘started with a vengeance!


Well, thank you. I just had to say that aloud like one of those movie voiceover guys when I read it. And who doesn't like Tomb Raider? How can you go wrong with extended, gratuitous shower scenes that might be utterly superfluous to the plot?

Hmm, it's like an onion, huh? Is it making you cry? Or have you just been watching Shrek?

Oh yes, I am also a big fan of dark and broody stories. Probably why I tend to write them. Glad you like the villain. He's is so much fun to write.

You think you know the 'What' do you? You might be surprised there, Patches. But you're right, the 'Why' is the meat of the story, the most interesting part. Sure, TUE is a whacked out evil-doer, but why is he? Or is it she? :devil

Yes, I'm doing well, and thanks for your good wishes. Update is right after ... this.


**********


Title: At Any Cost


Author: Paul aka Darth Pacula


Distribution: Knock yourself out, just ask first. ( That means yes if you're not sure )


Feedback: Go nuts. The more the merrier. Unless you're all wanting to roast me at the stake that is. Then, less is more.


Disclaimers: I could claim to own everything in existence, but I'd be lying through my teeth. So no, I don't own the Buffy characters. More's the pity.


Summary: A powerful, ruthless and unstable figure begins to meddle in Willow and Tara's lives, with unforseen consequences.


Rating: PG-13, maybe R at times for a touch of violence.


Timeline: Well now, it starts off just before the end of Seeing Red, but will contain elements of an altered Season 7.


Spoilers: Err ... pretty much the entire show. If you haven't seen any of it yet, and actually want to, you just aren't trying hard enough.


Thoughts are in italics.


The story so far ... The scoobies wake up, seemingly unharmed from the new Big Bad's covert visit, although they are all suspiciously tired to an unusual degree. They are starting to come up with ideas to try and find out their unknown opponents origin, and start to put those plans into action. Meanwhile, their enemy is shooting up god-knows-what, and having visions of his past, including a chat with one of his past victims ...


Part 9.


Willow looked up from her laptop as Tara entered through the front door, a spell book cradled in her arms. Willow greeted her with a delighted smile. My day always improves when she's around. The whole world just seems ... brighter somehow.


“Hey baby. Finished shoring up our defenses against the Wicked Whatever-the-heck-it-is of Sunnydale?”


“Yeah, Will. I added another couple of wards, and a few other little surprises, just in case he ... or she, tries making a house call. The house is as secure as I can make it.”


“Well, I know I'll certainly sleep soundly tonight,” Willow declared with a tired grin.


“Not too soundly, Willow,” Tara gently chided. “You really did scare me this morning.”


Willow's grin turned sultry, and she stared at Tara with heavily lidded eyes. “Well, I'm sure you could find some way of keeping me up tonight. If you really put your mind to it.”


“Vixen,” Tara shot back as her heartbeat sped up, and a faint flush colored her cheeks.


“For you, baby? Always.”


Tara pulled another chair beside Willow's and settled down into it. She leaned into her partner and rested her chin on Willow's shoulder. “How are you going with the crime scene report?”


Willow beamed proudly. “Easy as really easy pie. Just not as sweet,” she crowed. “I guess when they upgraded the security on the coroner's system they didn't do the police department as well.”


“That's my girl. Ms Big when it comes to computer crime.”


“I wouldn't really call it a crime,” Willow protested. “Sure it's technically illegal, but it's being done in a good cause, and if they didn't want people hacking into their system they really shouldn't make it so easy, cause I could have done this in middle school without breaking a sweat ...”


Tara broke Willow's babbling train of thought by the simple, but highly effective method of thoroughly kissing her. Willow eagerly responded wholeheartedly, and the kiss swifty became passionate, hungry, as if each woman was trying to devour the other whole. By the time the kiss finally broke, Willow was blinking owlishly, and both women were breathing heavily.


“I really should start babbling more if you're going to keep breaking me out of it like that,” Willow breathed dreamily.


“If I do that every time you start to babble, Will,” Tara replied shakily, “we'll never get any work done.”


“And, darn it, wouldn't that be a big heap o' crying shame?” quipped the redhead.


Tara's slow smile was heavy with pure contentment as she returned her head to Willow's shoulder. “So, does Buffy's theory pan out? Anything of the magical variety mentioned in the report?”


“Well, the entire security system was fried,” Willow answered, her brows drawing together in concentration as she intently scanned the screen of her laptop. “Every single electrical component appeared to short out simultaneously, but the system still registered as active with the security firm.”


“That seems a little on the odd side.”


“Well, it doesn't stop there. That security guard who was hurt during the robbery? They found his gun ... in pieces. It had been completely disassembled down to the smallest components and just scattered on the floor.”


“I'll take a wild guess that the guard would have been unlikely to have done that,” Tara murmured.


“I think you're pretty safe there, baby. Even the bullets had been broken up, so that the actual bullet and the ... thingy ... it goes in were separate. I don't think that's particularly easy to do by hand. But the kicker is this.”


Willow rotated the laptop so that Tara could see the screen, and brought up a digital photograph of the bank's vault door. It was liberally covered in strange, alien markings, written in a dark, crusty substance.


“What is that?” Tara asked, her head reluctantly leaving its Willow-shaped cushion to lean closer and peer at the screen.


“Well, that's the eight hundred and sixty-two thousand dollar question, isn't it?” Tara raised an eyebrow at the exact numerical nature of Willow's statement. “That's roughly how much he got away with,” the redhead explained.


“It's not any writing I'm familiar with,” Tara stated, returned her attention to the screen. “Can you ..”


“Enlarge and print? Already done,” Willow replied with a proud smile. “I'm guessing Giles will want a closer look at this when he gets back.”


“Is it written in ...” Tara began.


“Blood?” Willow finished, the corners of her mouth down turning in disgust. “I'm afraid so, Tara. It's human blood too, according to this.”


“Is it the guard's?”


Willow blinked in surprise. The idea of where the blood had come from hadn't occurred to her. I must be even more tired than I thought to have missed that.


“I'll look,” she replied, turning her full attention to her laptop. A few minutes reading gave her the answer. “No. It's definitely not the guard's. It's a totally different blood type.”


Tara nodded in satisfaction. “Well, we have one answer then. He's human.”


“Why do you say that, Tara? It's not necessarily his blood. He might have brought it with him.”


“Possibly, Willow, but I doubt it. When a spell calls for blood, it's always more potent if the caster uses their own. So I figure that the odds are that it is his blood.”


Willow gazed at Tara in wonderment. She knew that her partner was an especially wise and insightful woman, but it never failed to amaze the redhead just how intuitive Tara could be. It was so different to the way in which Willow herself tended to over-analyze things, but equally as effective.


“I know it's usually your line, but I am so turned on right now by how smart you are,” Willow purred in a sultry whisper. Tara actually blushed, and Willow giggled in delight. She always loved it when she could get her everything's cheeks to flame with nothing more than a handful of words. Almost as much as when she did it with other, more intimate uses of her tongue.


“You're incorrigible, Willow Rosenberg,” Tara stated happily, her breath catching in a delighted manner when Willow's eyes warmed with desire.


“Don't forget insatiable,” the redhead added, holding out her hand for Tara's, a silent invitation in her eyes and posture.


“What about ...”


“Dawn went with Xander and Anya. She volunteered to serve as a buffer zone between them. Everyone else should be gone for at least another hour still.”


“How did you manage that, Will?” Tara managed to gasp as desire curled throughout her body like a living flame.


“I have my ways,” Willow replied, her voice a sultry growl. “Are you coming?”


“Oh, yes.”


**********


When Giles returned with Buffy, he did indeed prove fascinated to discover Willow's printout of the markings painted in blood on the vault door. He was also suitably impressed with Tara's deduction that it was most likely the caster's blood.


As for their own progress, Buffy was less than enthused. Jonathan and Andrew had caved rather quickly to the Slayer-Watcher tag team, but provided little in the way of useful information beyond that their mystery man had indeed visited them, he claimed responsibility for Warren's fate, sought to keep Buffy and the other Scoobies out of trouble with the police, and finally, Andrew's oh-so useful declaration that he was scary as hell.


The news that Spike had left town, courtesy of Clem, the vampire's dermatologicaly challenged demon friend, surprised Willow. Given everything she knew about the peroxided vampire, some of which she really would have preferred not to know, Willow would have expected him to make more of a fight to reclaim Buffy's affections. However, the fact that Spike had fled Sunnydale before this new threat appeared served to somewhat remove him as a suspect as the source of their opposition's intel.


When Dawn returned with Xander and Anya, the teenager's expression had told without words the full horror of what she had underwent. Later, Dawn had confided in Tara the extent of the bickering that had taken place between the former couple, and the blond witch had felt heartily sorry for the teenage girl. Tara did muse that at least Anya was talking to Xander again, albeit louder than usual, which was progress of a sort.


The list they had returned with had proven of limited use. The sheer scope of their unknown enemy's purchases hadn't served to especially narrow down their choices as to what he was up to. Willow and Tara managed to come up with at least thirty-five possibilities, ranging from summoning sea monsters from the deepest depths of the ocean, to making it rain live herring over a fifty mile radius. Anya's vast, and frequently disturbing knowledge attained during her eleven hundred plus years as a vengeance demon, added to Giles' Watcher training, served to only increase the list.


Tara's generally accepted theory that their opponent was human didn't especially help either. Giles' attempts to contact the people with whom he had associated with as Ripper, had largely proved fruitless. His friends who had joined in Giles' practice of summoning the demon Eyghon were all dead, aside from Ethan Rayne, who had last been seen being taken into custody by the Initiative. Willow had sent an e-mail to Sam, Riley's wife, and discovered that the chaos worshiper was still being held by the US government in an undisclosed location, which effectively ruled him out of the running.


“I don't suppose there's any chance that Eyghon survived his little tussle with Angel, is there Giles?” Willow asked, as the scoobies gathered once more around the dining room table.


Giles rubbed his chin thoughtfully. “I'm inclined to doubt it, Willow. If Eyghon had survived, I would have expected him to make a return appearance well before now. Not to mention, Eyghon never exhibited any inclination towards the dark arts.”


“Is there anyone else in your past this guy could be, Giles?” Buffy asked, both the tone of her voice and the expression on her face openly indicating her frustration.


“Well, the fact that he referred to me as 'Ripper' certainly does suggest some prior involvement with me, but to be perfectly honest with you, I can't think of anyone who fits. Perhaps his use of my former nickname is just another one of his smokescreens, used simply to misdirect our efforts to identify him.”


“So ... we basically found out absolutely nothing?”


“In so many words, I suppose so, Buffy,” Giles reluctantly admitted. “But we have eliminated a great many possibilities, narrowing down the field, such as it is.”


“Yippee,” Buffy drawled sarcastically. “Feel my infectious enthusiasm at narrowing our list of suspects down to the greater part of the human population of the world.”


“Giles, when the Watcher's Council was here evaluating us, they mentioned some sort of registration for witches?” Tara offered hopefully. “Could that help identify him?”


Giles smiled bitterly. “Tara, I'm afraid that the Council's attempts at the registration of practicing witches is something of a pipe dream. The magic-using community often is comprised of individuals who frown upon what they see as efforts to exert any kind of control upon them. The Council's registration list rarely extends beyond those members of the Council's own ranks who employ magic.”


“Then why did they try to imply that we should have been registered?” asked Willow, slightly bewildered.


“Because they were trying to put us off balance, make us easier to manipulate. Right, Giles?” Tara stated, answering for the Watcher, who signaled his agreement with a somber nod.


“Why .... those sneaky, underhanded .... poopy-heads!” fumed Willow.


“Yeah,” Xander added with a sarcastic grin, “who would've expected such behavior from the people who stripped Buffy of her powers, fired Giles, tried to kill Buffy on her little out-of-body experience with Faith and have basically screwed us over every single time we had anything to do with
them.”


“Yep, lets hear it for the Watcher's Council of Great Britain, ruining the reputation of English people everywhere they go,” grumbled Willow. “I bet the British Tourism Board loves those guys.”


“So, back to my original point ... we've got diddly squat?” Buffy clarified.


“Not quite, Buffy. These markings on the vault door that Willow and Tara discovered aren't in any human language I'm familiar with. I'll have to ...”


“Consult your books?” Dawn suddenly piped up, grinning.


“You only just beat me to the punch, Dawn Patrol,” Xander cheerfully groused, and Dawn turned and poked him lightly in the arm.


“You snooze, you lose, Xander.”


“If you're quite finished playing 'Watcher Bingo', might I finish?” Xander and Dawn simultaneously gave the Englishman elaborate flourishes to continue, and Giles pinched the bride of his nose and restrained a sigh. “As I was saying, this might well be a demonic language that was used in the spell to open the door.”


“How does that help us?” Buffy asked. “Human or demon language, what difference does it make?”


“The language he used in the spell gives an indication of where he learned magic, or that particular spell at least,” Willow answered for Giles. “If we can identify the language, we might be able to identify where this guy has been ...”


“Which might help identify who he is,” Buffy finished, her lips curving in a
smile as she caught onto Willow's train of thought.


“Bingo,” Willow proudly pronounced.


“Hey, that's cheating,” Xander quipped. “Giles didn't say anything!”


**********


The lights still burned brightly in the windows of the Summers house as I stood outside, lurking in the shadows. They're certainly burning the midnight oil tonight. Annoying wretches. I can't continue with my work until they all go to sleep.


I resisted the impulse to pace, and held myself still with rigid self-discipline. To pass the time, I unleashed my tight grip on my awareness, and reached out, gently caressing the boundary of the witch's ward, probing it to see if any weak spots had formed over time.


A frown pulled the edges of my lips downward. Something has changed. Something's different. But what ... I reached out further with my mind, and activated the enchantments I had built into my artificial eye. A faint glimmering sheen overlaid my vision as I began to physically see the trail of Tara's magic.


A dry cough of a laugh escaped my ruined throat. She had strengthened her defenses since last night. Where there had been one ward spell, there were now three, forming concentric rings around the house like the walls of a fortress. She hadn't stopped there either. Tight glowing knots in my vision indicated other spells, of varying type and purpose, scattered around the yard, even on the front door and windows.


Mounting irritation warred with a growing pride in the witch. She's learning. Good girl. Until Willow realizes the stupidity inherent in her refusal to use magic again, I might need your help to keep her alive. Until I finish, anyway.


I turned my full attention upon Maclay's newly built defenses, measuring their effectiveness with a practiced eye. She really is quite good at this. Annoyingly good. My frown turned into a fully fledged snarl as I realized the full consequences of her meddling, and I began to savagely mutter demonic imprecations beneath my breath.


I wouldn't be able to enter the house tonight. The amount of energy I had expended last night, both in attaining entry and beginning to weave my spell into Willow's essence, had weakened me significantly. I would have to wait several days at least before I would be able to infiltrate the house again to continue my work.


Clamping my lips shut, I stalked furiously into the night. Thrice damned fools! I can ill afford such delays. Things would be much simpler if I didn't have to keep my actions secret. Though I doubt even Xander would be stupid enough to volunteer himself to my ministrations.


The spell that I was casting on Willow was an incredibly complicated and involved procedure. Even if I wasn't having to invoke it on the sly, it would take me days to complete. Since I was having to do it in small sections, while the scoobies were all asleep, that more than doubled the amount of time it would take. I didn't even want to think about how this latest complication would affect my timetable.


There was no way that I would be strong enough to continue tonight, which meant that I was going to have to find another way to occupy my time. I smiled cruelly. I think it's time I introduced myself to the neighbors.


**********


“How about Quongdong?” Willow suggested, her voice lusterless. The redhead could hardly believe how tired she was. She had been taking part in all night research-athons with the other scoobies for six years now, and she had never felt as tired as she did right now.


“Quongdong?” Xander repeated, fending off a yawn. “Kind of weird name for a ... what are we researching again?”


“Demon dimensions, Xander,” Dawn informed him. “But I've got to agree with you there about the name.”


“Yeah, sounds like it should be the name of a porno actor.”


Dawn's face screwed up in distaste. “Eww, Xander! I was thinking more along the lines of Treasure Island, not ... eww. Just eww.”


“Wow,” Xander murmured. “I'm having major league Cordy flashbacks.”


“I'm right there with you, pal,” Willow added.


Giles stepped behind Willow's chair and peered down at the book she was reading, before shaking his head. “I'm afraid not, Willow. The little ... squiggly thing ... in the upper left quadrant is all wrong.”


“Squiggly thing, Giles? You're letting us do on the vocabulary front there a bit aren't you?” teased Buffy.


“Yes, well, I'll blame it on the late hour and my advancing years, shall I?” Giles shot back, before affecting an elderly, doddering voice. “You young whippersnapper.” Buffy just grinned cheekily in reply.


Willow felt her eyes start to drift shut, but felt powerless to stop the gradual downward drift of her eyelids. It felt as if they were lined with lead, and were being dragged downward by some powerful magnetic force. Willow began to drift in her own head, floating on the ocean of her consciousness like a piece of errant driftwood.


Feeling as if she were watching herself from afar, Willow began to slip forward, her head dropping. She tried to stop herself, to halt her forward momentum, but it was if she had lost all control of her own body. Then Tara was there, catching Willow's falling body with one arm across the redhead's chest. Her lover's touch snapped Willow back into her body and she jerked backwards on reflex.


“Willow? Are you okay?” In her present condition, Willow could only just make out the sound of Buffy's concerned voice.


Tara's voice came next, sounding as if was coming from far away, or if Willow's ears were plugged with cotton wool. “I think Willow really needs to go to bed now.”


“Yes, Tara, of course,” Giles quickly agreed. “I imagine that all of us could use some rest right about now.”


“Now he says that? I've been yawning like a crazy man for hours!” Xander complained, earning a swat to the back of the head from Buffy.


Tara quickly said their goodnights for the both of them and led Willow upstairs, supporting her three-quarters asleep partner on her shoulder. Once she got Willow safely into their bedroom, Tara quickly changed the redhead into her nightclothes and eased her under the covers. By the time Tara had undressed and slipped into the bed herself, Willow was fast asleep.


Frowning slightly in concern, Tara gathered her lover's slender form into a tight embrace, pressing her face into the nape of Willow's neck and deeply inhaling Willow's natural scent. Goddess, please let this be like Willow said. Please let it just be the flu.


**********


Willow stared at her blond goddess, standing before her bathed in the sun's warm glow, wrapped in a glowing aura of incandescent light. The smile Tara wore was at once peaceful and knowing, pregnant with hidden knowledge, and Willow's heart swelled uncontrollably with adoration. Willow reached out with one hand, desperate to be with Tara, to touch her, to caress her, to wrap herself in Tara's singular essence as if it were a blanket formed of gentle warmth and pure love.


A harsh crack tore at the air, a cruel, harsh, unnatural sound. Willow felt warm liquid splatter her, and stared disbelievingly as a dark stain spread across Tara's chest. Tara spoke, halting and perplexed.


“Your shirt ...”


Tara fell, and to Willow it was as if her heart had been torn, still beating, from out of her chest at the same time. But she couldn't move, couldn't speak, couldn't even turn away from the sight that savaged at her grief-stricken mind like a rabid dog.


Willow felt a sudden presence beside her, and found she could move her head. Slowly, unwillingly yet unable to resist the strange power that compelled her, Willow craned her neck and found herself staring into a face out of a nightmare.


She saw the pitch black hair, like oily shadows given physical form. She saw the ruinous scars that disfigured him. She saw the artificial eye that burned into her with the force of a miniature sun. But it was the expression that stayed with her. An expression of terrifying rage and untold hatred that promised nothing but brutal and ruthless destruction.


He screamed, a sound of pure, inchoate fury, and the world ended.


....


Willow stared into a terrified face, and felt the power thrum through her, sounding cadence to the steady thump of her heartbeat. She was swollen with power, fat and heavy with it, but it turned her stomach. It was sick and bitter, this power that Willow found herself in possession of, vile and poisonous. So much so that Willow wanted nothing more than to weep.


The terrified man was babbling at her, but to Willow it was if the words were slowed and distorted. She could not understand a word he was saying, but to be perfectly honest she didn't want to. Willow felt herself filled with emotions that she couldn't explain, thoughts and desires that couldn't belong to her. I could never want to do that to someone. This isn't me. It can't be. Please goddess, don't let this be me.


She recognized him now, this small, terrified man suspended between two tree trunks by vines that did not, could not belong here. It was Warren, and he was begging her for his life.


“Let me,” a dry, rasping voice stated, and Willow felt herself stepping backwards. A figure wreathed in darkness, wrapped in living shadow like a cloak, stepped forward. The scarred man reached out, and caressed Warren's cheek with surprising tenderness.


He leaned forward, whispering in Warren's ear, but Willow heard every syllable with crystal clear pronunciation. “Scream for me.”


The same fingers that had been brushing Warren's cheek with such tenderness were now gore-stained bone talons, and flesh parted under their touch like melting butter. Willow watched, appalled and sickened, yet unable to turn away.


The forest in which they stood faded away, replaced with rough walls of rock and an uneven dirt floor. Warren now lay upon a rough-hewn stone alter, instead of being strung upright between two trees.


Willow watched helplessly, unable even to scream, unable to look away as the scarred man worked his dark arts upon the canvas of Warren's still living body, turning a living human being into a ghastly parody of shattered bone and torn flesh. Warren did scream. Oh yes, how he did scream.


And in her head, Willow screamed right along with him.


....


Willow found herself in a vast hall, lined with columns of black marble. The vaulted ceilings stretched upwards until they almost vanished in the distance. Burning torches hung from sconces bolted to the stone walls, and massive, hook-bladed weapons hung upon the walls.


The scarred man stood before her, bloodied and battered, with two .... creatures of hideous aspect beside him in the universal posture of guards. Yet, despite the blood still dripping freely from his wounds, despite his bruised and battered flesh, he was unbowed.


The hair was still pitch black, and dark veins still made him hideous to behold, but he was younger, softer, not yet sharped to a knife's edge of destructive fury. His sunken eyes were hidden by shadow, but some unknown instinct told Willow they were not black now.


Even as he stood before her, unafraid and yet obviously a prisoner of some description, this unnamed man fairly blazed with repressed power. In a manner Willow could not explain, she could sense the raw magical power radiating from his slender form. It made Willow shudder with fear.


“Teach me.” His sudden statement was not a request, yet nor was it a demand. It was more of a declaration, a statement of inevitable, unstoppable fact, as emotionless and unstoppable as the turning of the seasons.


The entire world froze.


“Even now, brought before me as little more than a petty thief, he shone with potential.” The sudden voice was warm and soothing, yet tinged with a deep, underlying sorrow. Finding she could move when she jumped in surprise, Willow turned, and found herself staring at the speaker.


The newcomer was short, perhaps a few inches beyond five feet. He wasn't human either; the craggy, gray skin and long, floppy, pointed ears made that obvious. Yet the inhuman face was kind and benevolent, the smile welcoming. Despite any misgivings her logical nature might harbor, Willow found herself instinctualy trusting the small demon.


“He possessed enough power at this point to easily have avoided, or even slain my guards. Yet he did not. Even when they beat him, he would not strike back. He was afraid that if he did so, I would reject him as my student.”


The demon stepped forward on graceful feet until he stood at Willow's side, peering mournfully at the dark man where he stood frozen, and sighed.


“He held so much potential that I was blinded to the dangers he posed,” stated the demon. His lips curved in a gentle smile. “I have the habit of thinking the best of people. Or rather, I did before he killed me.”


“Where am I?” Willow whispered tentatively.


“You are dreaming, child,” replied the demon.


“Are you real?”


“Alas, no. I am but an echo, a fragment, a ghost of a ghost, trapped when my greatest student, my greatest failure, slew me and stole my power.” The demon shrugged. “Such is the way of things, my child.”


“This is him?” Willow asked, gesturing towards the frozen figure before her. “This is who we're facing? Back on earth, I mean.”


“As I first beheld him, yes.”


“Who is he?”


The demon's smile turned melancholy at Willow's question. “I do not know, child. In all the years I knew him, he would not give his name, nor talk of from whence he came. His own concern was his own power, the magic.”


“You taught him without knowing who he was? Why would you do that?”


“Our time is short here, child. I bring you warning. He has come for you, and she who you love.”


“What?” Willow gasped, lurching backwards in shock. “Why us? What does he want with us?”


“Again child, I do not know. All I know is that you both are at the center of his plan. Whatever his dark design is, you and your mate are the alpha and omega of his obsession. Everything he has done, everything he will do, is to that end alone. And like everything else about him, his obsession is tainted. Tainted by the hate, rage, pain and grief that drive his every thought.”


“But what is he trying to do? We can't stop him if we don't know!”


“He seeks to right what he sees as an unforgivable wrong, child. And he will stop at nothing to do so.”


“How do we stop him, then? Tell me that at least.”


The demon sighed again, deeper this time, and shook his head solemnly. “I do not know if you can, child.”


“If he's so dangerous, why did you train him in the first place, huh?” Willow snapped, irritated by the constant flow of things this demon didn't know.


“Because he had such potential to be good, child. I do not know what terrible tragedy twisted him into the wretched creature he has become, but I hoped that I would be able to repair the damage. I was wrong.”


“Ya think?” Willow grumbled incredulously. “Now he's our problem. Thanks a bunch for that.”


“I am sorry child,” he stated apologetically, before peering upwards at the gloom enshrouded ceiling. “Our time together has ended. Farewell, child. We will not meet again.”


“What!” Willow exploded, grabbing the demon by one sleeve of his plain robe. “No! There's still so much more ...”


Reality faded, and Willow shifted restlessly in Tara's arms before falling back into an exhausted slumber. Unfortunately, as was so often the case with dreams, when Willow would next awake, she wouldn't remember a single thing.


**********


I limped into the bar known as Willy's Alibi, and regarded the décor with mild distaste. The place could, at best, be referred to as a dive, and that was being kind. Personally, I would have preferred to burn the rat hole to the ground, rather than set foot inside it, but it would serve my purposes for tonight. And that purpose did not involve consuming one of the variety of mind numbing intoxicants the proprietor sold. I had never seen the sense in drowning my sorrows, when my time could be better spent preventing, or changing them.


Unsurprisingly, every last patron was a demon of some description. I imagine it's something of an occupational hazard for a demon bar. I scanned the room, marking the location of every last being, living, dead or in-between, labeling them in my head as potential targets. Even as I walked to the bar, a portion of my mind was running through termination strategies. That's my occupational hazard; every time I go anywhere, I calculate the most effective ways to kill every living thing in range. It's not especially conducive to good mental health. Fortunately, remaining sane wasn't a requirement of my plans.


The greasy little weasel of a proprietor stood behind the bar, polishing a glass with a filthy rag. I doubted he was doing much of a job of cleaning. It was more likely that he was just moving the dirt around. I've always heard that a change is as good as a holiday, but I doubted that it counted for filth. I gestured the little worm over, but he shifted his gaze nervously, and made no move to ... well, move.


The little bastard was ignoring me! The pox-ridden whoreson! My first instinct was to gently capture his attention, preferably by removing a non-vital portion of his anatomy in the most painful fashion I could devise.


My second instinct was to be suspicious. Though in my case, that's more of a standard operating procedure. Why was he ignoring me? His kind of scum was not the kind to turn down a chance to make money, even if it were only a paltry five cents. Which meant there was a reason he was ignoring me.


A tingling sensation at the back of my skull gave me my answer. Someone, or more likely, something was approaching me and had breached the circle cast by my extended awareness. I turned, slipping a expression of banal helplessness upon the illusionary face I wore this night, while inside I rejoiced at the prospect of violence. Just what I need to improve my mood. And it will serve as an admirable object lesson to the rest of these wretches.


Unsurprisingly, the creature approaching me was a demon. It towered above me, perhaps brushing seven feet high, and it's frame swelled impressively with slab-like muscles beneath it's lumpy, pus-yellow skin. Moist, unblinking eyes stared at me curiously, and as it drew near, I caught it's scent. It's not unlike Parmesan cheese.


This particular demon was a To'Pai, typically found in Asia. Despite their brutish appearance, the To'Pai were typically a race of warrior-philosophers, who sought enlightenment through the practice of arms. They also had the unfortunate habit of tending to eat the still warm intestines of their fallen enemies, but no-one's perfect.


“We don't get many humans in here. The people who live in this town tend to show enough sense to avoid this dump.” The To'Pai's voice, while low pitched and heavy, was surprisingly cultured, and the disdain with which he regarded the bar was almost enough to make me like him. “Still, it's always nice to meet someone open minded enough to ...”


As fast as a striking snake, I interrupted the urbane demon by thrusting the index finger I had fleshcrafted into a bone talon through one eye and into the recesses of his skull until it was buried to the knuckle in his flesh. I almost felt regretful as I flicked my talon around the inside of the To'Pai's skull, scrambling his brains. The demon, already a corpse, twitched and spasmed on my finger, convulsive tremors rippling through the beast's frame. My finger, already reverted back to it's natural form, made a ghastly sucking noise as I pulled it from the demon's eye, and the corpse toppled to the floor.


A second To'Pai lurched to it's feet; a female, it was most likely the mate of my most recent victim. To'Pai mated for life, and tended to be very close, so I imagined the new widow wished nothing more than to reduce me to a red, wet smear on the floor. The female's mouth opened to give birth to a roar of rage and grief.


I thrust out one hand, and a lightning bolt leapt forth from my outstretched appendage, striking the To'Pai in the open mouth, and burning a two-inch hole all the way through her skull. Slumping back against the wall, the demon joined her mate, dead on the floor, leaving a technicolor smear of various bodily fluids on the wall as she fell.


A furious snarl, and the clatter of clawed feet on the floor turned my attention sideways, as another demon sprang upright and charged at me. I was unfamiliar with this particular species; it looked like a cross between a humanoid frog, and the lovechild of Bill Gates and a severely disfigured leper. In short, it was as ugly as sin.


Extending a finger, I muttered beneath my breath, and the demon staggered to a halt, twitching uncontrollably as my curse began to take effect. I watched with dispassionate eyes as the creature began to wail pitiably as it's skin blistered from within as it's veins filled with liquid fire. It burned alive from the inside out, and it's agonized screams served as an admirable means of acquiring the full attention of every other demon in the building.


I dropped all of my glamours, and let them see my true face. Those few among their number who had any appreciable knowledge of magic saw me, saw the truth of what I was in my ravaged features, and they knew to be afraid.


“Now that I have your undivided attention, allow me to extend my congratulations. You have all entered my employ,” I rasped emotionlessly.


One rodent-like demon scurried to his feet, and shook a three-fingered fist in protest. “What if we don't want to work for you!”


I turned my gaze on him, and even as he realized his mistake and cowered, I reached out with a coiled whiplash of power. The rat-demon's head exploded, showering his neighbors with gore.


“Are there any other complaints?” I asked in a deceptively mild tone of voice. I was not surprised when there were not. Many demons could not claim to be especially intelligent, but there isn't much better than having to pick one of your companion's brain matter out of whatever passes for your hair to get a point across.


“The terms of your employment are quite simple. You will spread a message for me amongst the demonic community in Sunnydale.” I paused briefly, sweeping the assembled demons with an ice-cold gaze. “The Slayer and her flunkies belong to me. Anyone, or anything, that makes any kind of move against them will earn the full force of my wrath. That tends to get ... messy.”


I stopped speaking, and stared at them expectantly. Every last one of them stayed frozen in place, afraid to even twitch. I sighed irritably, and made a shooing gesture in their direction, as if they were a flock of birds.


“Get out, you idiots.”


They fled as one, in a blurred flurry of limbs and tentacles. I shot out an arm, and grabbed one scrawny figure out from the stampede by the scruff of his unwashed, greasy neck.


“Willy, I presume?”


My captive, the bartender who had ignored me earlier, shakes his greasy head vehemently in denial. “Nope, pal,” he babbles at me. “I ain't Willy. I just work here.”


The smile with which I answer his blatant falsehood silently promises him untold agony. “Lie to me again, Willy, and I will rip out every last one of your teeth and re-insert them in your skull, like a deranged tooth fairy's version of a tiara. Am I understood?”


Willy nods his head frantically, and I release him, resisting the urge to wipe my hands clean. He scrambles backwards, his fear washing over me in a fashion similar to his hideous cologne. I am briefly tempted to kill him simply for having such atrocious taste.


“I am afraid you don't get off quite so lightly as those others, Willy. From here on out? You belong to me. You will be my eyes and ears. You will find out the location of every vampire nest, every demon lair, every place frequented by the denizens of the underworld, and you will pass this information on to me.”


“Yeah ... yeah, sure thing. Whatever you say.” He pauses, his rodent-like features screwing up in uncertainty. “Uh ... how do I do that?”


I lean in close, invading his personal space to a menacing degree. “I don't care, you little worm. Just get it done.”


I spin around dramatically, and stalk towards the exit, playing a role now. Personally, I would have preferred to fade into the background, but I am playing a part here. I need this little idiot, and all of his inhuman patrons to see me in a certain light. Perception is a cornerstone of manipulation, and manipulation is but one of the many tools I will use to see my will done.


“Hey!” Willy calls out, and I stop, refusing to turn to face him. Let him speak to my back, the inbred cur. “If I'm going to work for you, shouldn't I know what to call you?”


I pause, considering his request. I will not give him the name with which I was born. In truth, I rarely think of myself as that person anymore. They died along with everything else I cared about. Only the monster I have transformed myself into remains. Besides, I fully expect the imbecile to blabber the details of our arrangement at the slightest provocation, and if my true name were to come out it would cause unwanted and unneeded complications. But I feel that I should give him a name.


I smile coldly as the answer comes to me. When I was a student in Hyriault, unliked and friendless, my obstinate refusal to disclose my name or origins led the other students to give me a name of their own design. It was intended as an insult, a cruel barb to prick at my pride and sense of honor. They needn't have bothered. I have no honor, it would only get in the way of what I have to do.


So I took their mocking name. I made it my own, and in time, every last one of them came to fear it, to fear me. What was intended as an insult, became a byword for terror and brutality, the name of a bogeyman that would haunt the inhabitants of Hyriault for centuries. Yes. That will do nicely.


“You may call me ... Nameless.”


To be continued ...
Last edited by Darth Pacula on Thu Nov 17, 2005 12:14 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: New Fic - At Any Cost. (Updated 01 Oct)

Postby Patches » Sat Oct 01, 2005 2:34 pm

Well ... in that great Kitten tradition....

DIBS!!!!! Back later (likely Sunday, actually) with real FB. But until then...Paul -- holy fuck!!! God, do you tell a great story!!!
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Re: New Fic - At Any Cost. (Updated 01 Oct)

Postby grimlock72 » Sat Oct 01, 2005 3:29 pm

Hmm.. that was interesting...
I will not give him the name with which I was born. In truth, I rarely think of myself as that person anymore. They died along with everything else I cared about.


Now is that just an spelling-error or more significant ?

As is typical of old and wise good-magic masters, they're foolishly trusting. You don't give an angry young man a gun and trust you can persuade him to use it wisely later on, that's silly. I'm quite sure Obi-Wan (description read familiar:-) has gotten that message by now though :)

Willow's dream also increases the frustration that we the readers know much more about impending troubles for the scoobies, than the scoobies themselves. Where did Willow's dream come from anyway? Clearly it's not her direct memories as those don't include the infamous 'your shirt' words, neither does she know much about Nameless. Conclusion therefore must be that somehow that knowledge got into her, now who could have done that... :geek (duh). Better question is WHY do that. I find it hard to imagine Willow wouldn't remember a dream which pretty much spells out how Tara dies, Willow's worst nightmare, ah well.

Nameless might as well have ridden into Sunnydale on a chariot announcing his presence. He's at least smart enough to see that indeed soon everyone will know about what he did. That was rather stupid in my opinion, creating lots of unknown enemies... silly warlock, tsk tsk... The human requires sleep after certain amounts of time, not much you can do then... except some wards but if someone comes around who doesn't care about detection... That would be anti-climax though, Mr. Nameless being killed by the angry family of the To'Poi demon he killed, heh. :)

It's really to bad that Mr. Nameless isn't thinking entirely sanely, makes it hard to guess his plan. At one time he seems to need Tara to keep Willow alive. That would mean Willow would be in danger, caused by who again ?? If you're so concerned about Willow staying alive, get out of Sunnydale :)

It's nice that Tara's protection spells are slowing Mr. Nameless down, why did she increase then so severely, I must have missed that? Obviously those spells must have cost her a lot of work and energy, maybe she does sense some danger??. Time is most definitly not on Namless' side. Good thing that too, as he is far to powerfull currently anyway (unbeatable enemies are rather boring:lol). He wants everybody asleep before moving in the house, what about Miss Kitty, cats have very odd sleeping habits :P (and can be rather protective of their owners, heh). Where/when did Tara learn such intricate protection spells by the way ?? I couldn't determine if Nameless had seen all traps woven into the shields, would be fun if he tripped one... he would be soooo pissed at himself :lol.

I'm wondering what exactly Mr. Nameless wants from Willow. Clearly he wants Willow to do something but needs a huge spell (charachter rewrite?) for that. If I were optimistic that might even be good for Willow, but Nameless' behaviour doesn't inspire such thinking ("Willow, I'm doing this for you're own good"... naaaah :)). If he were out to rescue/protect Willow he could easily do so with having such angry thoughts.

Besides, if Willow needs to save herself somehow... that would mean she's under threat from something Nameless can't or won't handle for her?? Damn, this stories is causing me headeaches :lol

Speaking of thoughts; this was an interesting thought: "Fortunately, remaining sane wasn't a requirement of my plans.". I doubt it's true however, not much spellcasting to be done when truly insane :P

It's interesting that Nameless proudly holds on to being evil. He's rather determined to be evil, like thats a goal all by itself (it's not focussed on specific demons either). Almost like shield or something, bit hard to explain. So he came to Hyriault already being rather evil... Willow is soooo right about Obi-Wan being rather stupid... guess it runs in the familly :devil

Hmm... I could probably write on a bit about the Watcher quiz, Tara and Willow teasing and truly talking to one another. Willow being her normal quircky self with the babling and all... but this will have to do for now :)

Frustrating is still the operative word for this story, the scoobies not knowing the danger... :gnome :fit2 :gnome :fit2

P.S. "phyric victory" was the word I was looking for, I tend to use the game-description when I can't remember it :) It was an old Amiga 500 game so don't be to emberrassed not knowing it :)

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"You hurt Tara," Willow said too calmly. "The last one who tried that was a god. I made her regret it."
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Re: New Fic - At Any Cost. (Updated 01 Oct)

Postby Missocki » Mon Oct 03, 2005 7:05 am

:bounce Damn! Another outstanding update! So, okay, old theory out the door, but that doesn't mean that I don't have others... Oh no!

I just can't wait for the next thrilling installment of this story!

Laters!
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Re: New Fic - At Any Cost. (Updated 01 Oct)

Postby AntigoneUnbound » Tue Oct 04, 2005 10:25 am

Ah, Paul, what a complicated tale you're weaving for us grateful Kittens.

The thing that stood out for me in this update is your remarkable descriptive ability. I saw Tara's shooting, Warren's flaying, the To-Pais' gruesome deaths.

Thanks for that!

No, really, it's wonderfully evocative b/c it draws us closer, heightens our connection to the story. You probably know the old writing edict, "Show me, don't tell me," and you delivered beautifully.

This BB continues to intrigue me. (I'm still standing behind my PM hypothesis; marvel/chortle as you will...) See, you give us enough insight into his mind (or what's left of it) that it's impossible to dismiss him as a caricature. He's grotesque and he's chosen evil and his means of perpetrating that evil are hideous in the extreme...and yet at one point he wanted to fight by Buffy's side.

And I loved your treatment of the ghost sage. Helpful yet not, that one. So much information, and yet when asked how to avert that cataclysm he can only say glumly that it may not be possible.

Thanks for that!

I nodded with grim empathy at Willow's frustration at
all the things this demon didn't know.


I'm so enjoying this, Paul!

Oh: I think Grimmy's looking for the phrase Pyrrhic [peerik] Victory, named after an ancient king who won a battle (against the Romans, I think) but at a staggering cost to his own forces. And yes, I'm a freak.

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Re: New Fic - At Any Cost. (Updated 01 Oct)

Postby Darth Pacula » Thu Oct 06, 2005 3:07 am

G'day fellow kittens, and greetings from Down Under, where I sit and swelter. I swear, you'd almost think we skipped spring and went straight to summer. And it's only going to get hotter. Oh joy.

Anyhoo, replies first, then the update.

-----

Patches - Congrats on the dibs, mate. Far be it for me to mess with Kitten tradition. Er ... not much else I can say, since you haven't come back yet ( and it's Thursday now :-D ), so I'll just have to say thanks for the complement.

-----

grimlock72 - G'day there, Grimmy. Ah, well, I'd have to say that was neither a spelling mistake nor something more meaningful. I just used the word 'they' as if Nameless was speaking about someone else, as opposed to himself. Okay, maybe that's grammatically incorrect. I haven't got a clue.

I liked your angry young man with a gun metaphor. You hit the nail on the head there. I suppose that 'Obi-Wan' in this case figured that if he didn't teach Nameless, someone less savory might end up doing so. Plus, we tend to see aspects of ourselves in other people, so he probably really did believe he could help Nameless.

Good questions about the origins of Willow's dream. There's no way in hell it could have just come from Willow's subconscious, because she doesn't know any of this stuff. So, was it intentional? Why did she forget the dream when she woke up? Well, think about how many dreams/nightmares you remembered after you woke up. Just because she saw her worst thoughts come true, doesn't guarantee that Willow would remember it. Plus, making her forget just seemed like the evil thing to do. :devil

Why did Nameless crash the demon bar? Well, he does have a reason, and I address that in this update, so read on and find out what it was. But you're right. A bad guy who is bug nut crazy is kind of hard to predict. That's half the fun of writing this, keeping everyone wondering exactly what Nameless is up to.

Tara increased the protection's on the house so severely because Giles suggested it was a good idea to do so. Plus, Willow lives there, so I'd think that would be sufficient motivation for Tara to do everything she could to make things safe for them. You're right about unbeatable foes being boring, but Nameless isn't unbeatable. He's been beaten plenty of times in the past, hence all his scars. The only problem is he's hard to kill, and killing him is the only way they're going to stop him at the moment.

I haven't mentioned Miss Kitty in the story so far, and I'm kind of reluctant to just chuck her in part way through. It just seems kind of wrong to me for her to just appear out of nowhere. Which is pretty much why I didn't do the whole bug splat thing earlier.

I see the wards Tara used as being a variation upon the ones she and Willow put around the Magic Box in season 5 as an early warning system for Glory. Plus, we don't really know what she was up to while estranged from Willow on the show, so just imagine that she spent a fair amount of time improving her skills.

What exactly are Nameless' plans for Willow? Could he actually be trying to protect her from something? All good questions, but I'm still not going to answer them. :devil

Yeah, his comment about being insane is probably hyperbole, but I've always heard that only those people who are insane never doubt their sanity, so who knows. Either way, he's bent in the head.

Good point about Nameless almost hiding behind his repeated claim to be evil. Is he really as bad as he tries to make himself out to be? Sure, he's not a nice guy, and he is a murderer, but is he truly bad-to-the-bone evil?

Amiga 500, huh? If that's before the old Amiga 2600 and the Commodore 64, then yep, beyond my time I'm afraid.

It's always good to hear from you, Grimmy.

-----

Missocki - Hello again, Missocki. So, I shot down another one of your theories? But you still have more? Good to know. Thanks for enjoying this, and the next 'thrilling installment' is coming up just after this.

-----

AntigoneUnbound - G'day Mary. Ah yes, what a complicated web we weave, when at first we set out to deceive. Well hell, if I can gross someone out with only my lack-luster prose, I'll count it as a job well done.

Yeah, I'm trying to put people in two minds as to my villain. Sure, he's bad, and extremely disturbed, but he wasn't always that way. So what made him snap? What made him turn to evil? In my opinion, it's always the bad guys who evolve into being evil that are the most interesting. You have to ask what would they have been like if things had turned out differently.

Well, how could I have a dream vision of Nameless' old master and have him just give away the answer. That wouldn't have been half as much fun as making him as useful as snow chains in the middle of an Australian summer.

I'm so glad you're enjoying this, cause I'm enjoying the hell out of 'As Time Goes By'.

Thanks for the clear up about Pyrrhic victory, though in all fairness, I did misspell it first. I actually only picked up the phrase recently, and I can't for the life of me remember where. It wasn't you was it?

PS. Never apologize for being a freak. As the little placard thingy above my desk of Garfield dressed as Frankenstein's Monster says, 'Why be normal!'

PPS. Pyrrhus, whose life coined the term of a Pyrrhic victory, was king of the Molossians, and claimed descent from Achilles, and actually made quite a few costly military victories, including against the Romans. Incidentally, he was once married to a woman named Antigone! How's that for coincidence, huh? See, you're not the only freak around here, Mary. :-D


**********


Title: At Any Cost


Author: Paul aka Darth Pacula


Distribution: Knock yourself out, just ask first. ( That means yes if you're not sure )


Feedback: Go nuts. The more the merrier. Unless you're all wanting to roast me at the stake that is. Then, less is more.


Disclaimers: I can't even lay claim to an air conditioner, so no, I don't own any of the original characters from Buffy. And I'm starting to stick to my chair.


Summary: A powerful, ruthless and unstable figure begins to meddle in Willow and Tara's lives, with unforseen consequences.


Rating: PG-13, maybe R at times for a touch of violence.


Timeline: Well now, it starts off just before the end of Seeing Red, but will contain elements of an altered Season 7.


Spoilers: Err ... pretty much the entire show. If you haven't seen any of it yet, and actually want to, you just aren't trying hard enough.


Thoughts are in italics.


The story so far ... Well now, gentle readers, our heroes still haven't managed to turn up much in the way of concrete information on the latest Big Bad to hit Sunnydale, though they are narrowing it down. Meanwhile, Willow's has had a disturbing dream, which has raised more questions about their new villain than it answered, but she promptly forgot it. Meanwhile, the aforementioned villain, temporarily thwarted in his attempts to gain entry again to the Summers household, has made some new friends at a local demon bar.


Part 10.


Time passed. Minutes turned into hours, hours turned into days, and days turned into weeks with the constant inevitability of time. Yet their unnamed foe did not materialize. The scoobies did not see him. He did not send taunting messages. He made no great, sweeping gestures of evil. He launched no attacks. He unleashed no biblical plagues of insects, nor, as Anya feared, did he unleash hordes of bunnies. In short, as far as the scoobies could ascertain, he didn't do anything. And it was starting to really annoy Buffy.


“Why doesn't he do anything?” she demanded one morning, throwing down the morning paper in disgust. “I like my evil ... well, evil! Not sitting back somewhere scratching it's ass!”


“Umm ... Buffy, isn't the whole lack of evil a good thing?” Willow asked tentatively where she sat at the dining room table, half-heartedly working on a bowl of cereal.


“Sure, in theory, Will,” Buffy replied, gesturing emphatically. “The whole evil deed thing is ... well, evil, obviously. But how are we supposed to stop this guy, if he doesn't do anything?”


“Maybe we should just be glad that no-one else has been hurt,” offered Tara as she entered the room, crossing to stand behind Willow. Her hands went to the redhead's shoulders and gently started to rub at Willow's tense back muscles. Willow quietly sighed in satisfaction and leaned backwards, nuzzling at her lover's arm with her cheek.


Buffy sighed too, but there was nothing satisfied in her demeanor. “I know, Tara. I should be glad that no-one else has been hurt, but I can't help but think of the people who'll get hurt if we don't stop this guy fast.”


“It's a catch twenty-two situation,” Willow agreed, “But we can't let what might happen decide what we do now.”


“I suppose you're right, Will. I just hate being helpless.”


“We're not helpless, Buffy,” stated Tara, wryly grinning. “We just don't know what to do.”


“You know, it's always the quiet ones you have to worry about. That usually means they've got some big, complex plot that's inevitably going to do that whole biting us in the ass thingy. I'm sick of teethmarks in my butt.”


Willow blushed as a sudden thought crossed her mind. “Are we talking metaphorical teethmarks, Buff? Or literal, you know, what with ... “ The redhead's voice trailed off in embarrassment as she realized what she was blurting out.


Buffy stared at her best friend in mortified amusement, her own cheeks flushing. “Will, are you asking ... Do you really want to know the details of what Spike and I did together?”


“Oh goddess, no!” Willow and Tara blurted together in an impressive display of synchronized begging, and Buffy burst into awkward laughter at the horrified expressions on their faces. It was at that precise moment that Giles entered the room, sipping at a cup of tea. The Watcher's gaze slipped curiously between each of the three young women.


“What are we discussing?” he asked.


“Oh, we were just discussing ass-biting,” Buffy replied with an utterly straight face.


Giles blinked, placed his empty cup on the dining room table, and removed his glasses, pinching at the bridge of his nose. “I would need to have imbibed a considerable amount of alcohol before I could even attempt to withstand such a discussion, so I'll leave you ladies to it, shall I?”


Gathering the fragile shreds of his dignity around him, Giles replaced his glasses and made his best effort to scurry out of the room without appearing to hurry. The sound of three distinct, feminine voices giggling followed him out, chasing Giles as he fled.


**********


As the days passed, Willow's unexplained fatigue continued, and Tara's worry increased with every day that it did not subside, yet Willow stubbornly refused to even consider that it could be anything other than the product of a particularly persistent flu.


“Willow, maybe you should see a doctor?” Tara suggested, her brow furrowed in concern as she stared at her partner's exhausted face. The two women lay together in bed, ignoring the warm, sunny morning outside.


“It's just a flu, baby. It'll pass,” Willow obstinately assured her.


Tara surged upright, leaning back against the headboard, and pulling her knees up to her chest. “Willow, you don't know that. This ... fatigue, or whatever it is you're feeling, it could be anything.”


“Tara, baby ...”


“No!” Tara snapped, upset and pushed to the brink by her fears for her lover's wellbeing. “Willow, this isn't normal. If it was just a flu, we would have seen other symptoms in you by now. But we haven't! And you aren't getting any better, and ... and you just keep ignoring it!”


“Tara, I'm okay,” Willow urged, trying to calm Tara's distress by holding her close. “I'm telling you that it'll pass.”


Tara pushed Willow away, and leapt from the bed, hugging her arms against her chest. “No, Willow! It's not okay! I watched my mother waste away, and I won't do that again. Not with you.”


“Baby, I'm not your mother. Which is good, because that would make what we do ... well, kinda icky.”


“Are you making fun of me?” Tara snapped, appalled by what she saw as insensitive flippancy. “Are you making fun of my mother?”


“What? No, Tara, I'd never ...”


“Damn it, Willow! You don't know that it's nothing!” Tara was close to shouting now, and she could barely see for the tears welling up in her eyes. “Do you think you've got a monopoly on being afraid? I can't lose you, Willow!”


Willow scrambled to her feet and wrapped Tara in her arms, ignoring the blonde's half-hearted attempts to fend her off. “Tara, baby. I'm not going anywhere, you're not going anywhere. We're both going to stay right here and grow old together. I won't let anything stop that, okay.”


Tara pulled her head back, and peered tearfully into the intense green of Willow's eyes. “Sweetie, w.. what if you're really sick?”


“Then we'll deal with it, baby. Together.” One hand smoothed the tangled strands of Tara's hair. “Look, if I'm not better in a few days, or I get worse, I'll go straight to the doctor, okay?”


“Do you promise?” Tara whispered.


Willow took her lover's face between her hands, and leaned in close, until the sweet, cool blue of Tara's eyes was the only thing to exist in Willow's world. “I promise,” Willow murmured, and sealed her promise with a gentle kiss.


**********


Demons don't like being told what to do, least of all by humans. Even openly homicidal, magically endowed ones like myself. By declaring my intent to mark the Slayer and her friends as my exclusive prey, under threat of annihilation to any who would challenge my plans, I all but guaranteed that they would act against me in concert. Which was exactly what I wanted.


The principle was the same as that used by a stage magician. Misdirection; make your audience look in one direction, while you move in the opposite. My seemingly clumsy declaration of my intentions at Willy's Alibi had one specific purpose. To bring me to the collective attention of those demons who might wish harm upon my prey. I had made myself a target. I had made myself bait.


Some might say that I was taking a risk. In some ways, I suppose I was. In the end scheme of things, though, my life was inconsequential. I need only survive long enough to see my plans come to fruition. Should I fail, should I fall ... then everything I have done will have been in vain. But should that happen, I will be burning in Hell, and will be beyond caring anymore.


Still, there are four things that I can claim to be very good at. Magic, warfare, killing, and staying alive where other men would surely perish. For every moment of the past two decades, I have walked upon the knife's edge of destruction. The smallest stumble in any direction would bring about inevitable ruination, from any one of a myriad of foes. Including myself.


I was both a walking decoy, and a trap for any that should strike at it. I had stolen the attention of any who might have considered moving against Willow or her friends, made them focus instead upon me. In the past week, I had withstood three separate attacks. Survived is perhaps too dramatic a word though. They had been crude, clumsy strikes, barely worth my attention. Even the basest apprentice assassin in Hyriault would have been ashamed to laid claim to such sloppy work.


Now, they were beginning to take the threat I posed seriously. They were having a 'summit meeting' to discuss the possibility of banding together to combat me. They had also provided me with my own splendid opportunity to strike. Now, they would discover just how formidable I could be.


The heads of the assorted demon groups had decided to meet in an old, abandoned cannery plant down by the Sunnydale docks. They had, of course, ringed the building with sentries. I, of course, had slaughtered their sentries in under a minute, without raising the alarm. Truly, these fools think themselves dangerous? None of them would have lasted a week in the war camps.


I bound every entrance I could find in runes of blood, even the concealed entry into the sewers, sealing them tighter than a politician's purse-strings. The primal, visceral portion of my personality wished nothing more than to storm the building, to rip and tear at those who would dare to threaten my mission. To physically rend them limb from limb.


But good as I am, I can still die. Far too many times already have I come to the very threshold of death's door. This close to the fulfillment of my ultimate goal, to take such a risk for no more reason than to satisfy my darker urges would be rank stupidity.


So I settled for burning down the building with them trapped inside. Their collective screams proved ... delightfully entertaining.


**********


“So, how are you feeling this morning, Will?”

This was the first thing that Willow heard when she woke. In point of fact, the redhead's eyes hadn't even opened, and she wondered what had given away her change in consciousness. Goddess, can't she even give it a rest for one damn day?


Willow froze, shocked to the core by the bitter note to her own thoughts. What the ... Why am I mad at Tara? She's just worried because she loves me so much.


Willow finally opened her eyes, and found Tara leaning over her, the worry glinting in her sapphire eyes contrasting oddly with the small, hopeful smile on her full lips. Lips that Willow found herself suddenly fixated on.


“Willow?” Tara asked again, her grinning growing slightly at the way her partner was staring at her. The intensity of Willow's gaze made Tara feel like a banquet, being ogled at by a starving woman.


Blinking slowly, Willow came back to her senses, and found herself blushing as Tara grinned at her knowingly.


“See something you like, Ms Rosenberg?”


“Oh, I noticed a few things with definite future possibilities, Ms Maclay,” Willow drawled back, trying somewhat futilely to regain her composure.


“Feel up to answering my question yet, sweetie?”


“Huh? Oh ... yeah.” Willow paused, running through her own mental checklist for her physical condition. “Umm ... yeah, I think I do feel a bit better.”


“You do?” Tara's smile blossomed into an expression of pure delight.


“Yep. I still feel a bit tired, but not as bad as I was. I mean, I'm not going to go out and run a marathon, but then again I wouldn't have even before I got sick. No siree, ma'am, not exactly a gal known for long distance running here. Unless I'm being chased by something big and ugly with the fangs and the claws, and the inevitable slavering ...”


“Willow, do I need to break your train of thought again?” Tara interrupted with a sultry smirk, recalling her earlier success.


Willow returned the grin with an equal amount of heat in her gaze. “Yes, please.”


Tara quite happily obliged.


**********


“We're taking the day off,” Willow declared, expression set firmly in resolve-face mode.


Giles looked up from the latest tome of esoteric demon lore to have captured his interest, a slight, preoccupied frown on his face. Buffy on the other hand brightened considerably at Willow's declaration. Though, given the hang-dog expression she had been wearing as she slowly waded through a similar book, that wasn't hard to achieve.


“You and Tara going to do something couple-y, Will?”


“Yep, we're headed out for a picnic in the park.”


“Er, do you think that's particularly wise at this current juncture in time, Willow?” Giles interrupted. “Given the magnitude of the threat we're currently facing ...”


“Giles, we don't know much of anything about the 'threat' we're facing. We've been working on this for weeks now, and we haven't learned much of anything.” Willow transfixed the watcher with a glare so pointed you could fence with it. “Now, Tara and I am going on a picnic, and you aren't going to stop us, okay? You see the resolve-face?”


“Ah ... yes, I do see your 'resolve-face', Willow. But ...”


“Resolve-face, Giles. You don't argue with the resolve-face.”


“Lighten up, Giles,” cajoled Buffy, inflicting her most saccharine puppy-dog face on the beleaguered Englishman. “With everything that's been going on, they could use the break, and I think we can spare them for the rest of the day, right?”


“Well, yes I suppose so. But ...”


“Great! It's all settled then.” Buffy turned on her heel and walked towards the kitchen with Willow, both women firmly focused on a discussion about the best foods to take on a romantic picnic, completely ignoring Giles' floundering complaints. As Buffy and Willow vanished from his sight, Giles indulged himself in a rare fit of pique, snatching off his glasses and throwing his arms up in disgust.


“Why do I even bother?” he asked himself. After a few moments, Giles found himself answering his own question. Because I love them. With a long-suffering sigh that was largely put on, Giles returned to his studies, determined to find that one elusive piece of information that would make everything clear.


**********


A couple of hours later found the two witches sprawled out on a large blanket in the shade of an equally sprawling tree. They lay in a T-shaped formation, with Willow's head resting on Tara's stomach, while Tara slowly and lovingly ran one hand through her lover's flaming red hair.


Both women were utterly content, replete from the bounty of their shared feast, the detritus of which they had carefully returned to their picnic basket, before surrendering to the siren call of their current languid repose.


Both women luxuriated in the presence of nature, man-made and structured as it was, allowing the simple presence of nature's quiet bustle to wash over them, bathe them in peace and harmony. After the last few weeks of persistent, if uncertain, dread, the quiet peace inherent in nature was a soothing balm to both women's fractured nerves.


“You never did tell me how you finagled us out of research duty, Will,” Tara stated lazily, following the spiraling fall of an errant leaf, before it was caught by a breeze and sent spinning into the distance.


“Hmm?” Willow replied, her eyes slipping open from the half closed state in which they had been residing. “Oh, right. Resolve-face.”


“Ahh. Works every time.”


“Darn tootin'!” Willow pronounced proudly. “I put a lot of effort into developing that, I'll have you know.”


Tara smiled, and stopped her stroking of Willow's hair long enough to caress the redhead's cheek. Willow purred like a cat, pressing her cheek more firmly into Tara's touch. The blonde witch's smile fell slightly, as she considered renewing their debate over Willow's continual refusal to use magic, but Tara decided to leave the sensitive subject for later. This current moment of peace they were currently enjoying was far too precious to risk with the potential for an argument.


Tara tried to recover her earlier sense of peace, but found it infuriatingly elusive. A strange, creeping sensation burrowed through her, and Tara found herself shivering compulsively. Her frown deepened as she rose into a sitting position, and Willow grudgingly copied her, reluctant to abandon her comfortable pillow.


Tara found herself sweeping her gaze over the park, a frown on her lips, unsure of exactly what she was looking for.


“Baby, are you okay?” Willow asked, concerned by Tara's behavior. “Is something wrong? My head wasn't too heavy was it?”


“No, every thing's okay, sweetie,” Tara replied, still looking around distractedly. “It's just ... I got this sudden impression that someone was watching us.”


“Well, who wouldn't watch two hot mama-yamma's making out in the park?”


This pulled Tara's head around to stare at Willow in bemusement. “Will, sweetie? We're not making out at the moment.”


“Do you wanna start?” Willow asked, grinning from ear to ear.


**********


I sat on the park bench and stared at the witches as they embraced and kissed. The warm sunlight beats down upon me, yet I still feel cold. Cold, tired, and alone. As I watch them express their love through the simple joy of physical contact, all that I can feel is numb. I feel empty, hollow, bereft.


They are both so alive, in every sense of the word. They burn with passion, for each other, for those they care about, for life itself. I do not. They are alive, but I .... I am all but dead inside. In oh so many ways, Willow and I are polar opposites.


She is filled with love and happiness. I am filled with hate and anger. She is bright and cheerful, a creature of light and sound. I am dark and grim, a child born of darkness and pain. Together, we are yin and yang, darkness and light, good and evil. Two sides of the same coin, bound together by fate, but doomed never to touch. That is how it should be. I think it was Shakespeare that once wrote that life is a play, and that we all are but players upon the stage of life. Everyone has a part to play, and no choice but to play it. And every story needs a villain. So I play my part, the part fate and my own choices have led me to.


I realize, that at this very moment, part of me hates Willow. She is the reason that I am what I am, a twisted mockery of a human being. She is why I will forever be alone, why I will never be at peace. She is why I am broken inside. Why I am wrong.


I hate her, and yet, at the same time, I do not. A short, bitter, self-mocking laugh escapes my lips. As in so many other ways, I am a contradiction, an enigma wrapped in a conundrum. I am chaos incarnate. But most of all, I am alone.


Together, the witches are the key, Willow especially. Without her, this has all been a waste, and I have sacrificed too much to reach this far. I can not fail. I must not. I know this, know it with every fiber of my being. But I could make it all end here, now. I could make it end.


It would be so easy. A quick charge, two swift slashes with the knife at my hip, and they would be dead. We could all die together. They would go to Heaven, and I would go to Hell, but it would be over. It would finally be done. So easy.


I realized my fingers were rubbing back and forth against the hilt of my knife. So easy. Just unsheathe it, and ... It could be over. I could finally rest, even if it were in my own grave. The sound of their delighted laughter reaches my ears, and it is simultaneously a knife twisting in my innards, and a soothing balm to my ravaged soul.


Together, they represent everything that I lost, everything that I seek to reclaim. They are everything that I never really had. And it would be so easy to kill them. So very easy. We are bound together, Willow and I, bound by our shared past, by ties stronger than steel, yet as fragile as glass. She made me, not through any choice of her own, but rather through the capricious whim of cruel fate. She is the reason I am what I am, but the blame cannot be totally paid at her feet.


I chose this. I chose to corrupt and pervert everything that I could have ever been. I chose to fall. Even when we think we have no choice at all, we still choose. And I chose this. So I will see it out, to the very end.


And no force in Heaven or Hell, or any dimension in between, will help anyone or anything that gets in my way.


**********


Fay Morgan was, in many ways, an average five year old girl. She loved to run, and skip, and play. She could somehow, mysteriously, become happily filthy in a matter of moments, a fact that never failed to make her mother sigh and smile simultaneously. Fay loved her parents, unconditionally, and fully believed that nothing bad could ever happen to her in their presence. She also loved her Nana, her best friend Jess, and a long suffering Golden Retriever who bore the cringe-worthy name of Mr Bugglesworth.


But in one way, Fay was not average, not normal. In one particular way, she was exceptional, gifted. Fay could See. Fay herself did not especially understand her gift, but she didn't worry about that fact. It was simply a part of her, just as much as her soft golden hair, or the cupid's bow of her mouth.


Fay's Nana understood her gift, and had promised the child that she would explain it properly to her one day, when she was older. Fay hadn't been especially worried; in fact, she tended to forget that other people could not do what she could, though she did usually remember her Nana's advice to keep her gift a secret. Fay's mommy had laughed when Fay had told her that, and called Nana a silly old hippie. But Fay knew her mommy didn't mean it.


Fay could see aura's. She didn't particularly understand what an aura was, but she could see them as clearly as other people saw ... well, all the other people. To her, it was simply a colored cloud that told her how a person felt. She knew when her mommy and daddy were sad, when they were happy, when they were sick or tired. But Fay had never seen an aura like the one she saw around the man at the park.


The man sat on a bench bathed fully in the bright sunlight, but to Fay he still gave the impression of being hidden in shadow, cold and lonely. His aura was thicker than most people's, and shimmered with sparkles, as if tiny fireworks were being set off inside it. It was also a myriad of colors, swirling and blending chaotically.


Nana had helped Fay learn what each color in a person's aura signified, and Fay concentrated, biting her lower lip between her teeth as she tried to make sense of what she saw in this man's aura. But it made little sense to the young girl. There were simply too many colors.


Fay saw the red of anger, brown of bitterness, the black of hate and the green of obsession, all swirling together in a maelstrom of color. But there was one single color overwhelming all of the others; silver. Sorrow. This strange man was incredibly sad, more so than anyone Fay had ever seen before.


Fay walked towards him, her heart aching for the stranger. No-one should ever be that sad. I'll try and cheer him up. As she drew near, his head turned and he stared at her, expressionless. Fay tried to look at his face, as her mother had always told her it was impolite not to look at someone when you talked to them, but found she couldn't focus on it. It was if the sad man's face was covered with butter, or soap, and Fay's eyes just kept slipping off him. But she could still see his aura, so she fixed her eyes on that instead.


“Why are you sad?” Fay asked, with the casual bluntness that young children possessed.


The stranger blinked in surprise. “What makes you think I'm sad?” he asked in reply, tilting his head like a bird of prey as he regarded the young girl. His voice was quiet and broken, like his throat was terribly painful.


“I see things,” Fay answered, completely forgetting her Nana's advice in the face of the puzzle this strange man represented.


“You see things?” The stranger paused. “You see aura's, child?”


“I'm not a child!” Fay proclaimed indignantly. “I'm five!”


The sad man's lips twisted in a wry smile. “That is a child, girl. Be glad you're a child. Things don't get better when you grow up. They get worse.”


“No they don't,” Fay declared with solemn, utter certainty. “Don't be silly.”


The stranger shrugged, as if he didn't much care if Fay believed him or not. “As you wish, young lady.”


Fay scuffed her pink sneakers in the dirt. “So ... why are you so sad?”


“You are tenacious, aren't you?”


“What does that mean?”


“What? Tenacious?” he asked, and Fay nodded. “It means ... that you're stubborn. You don't give up easily.”


“Oh. So why are you ...”


Fay's statement was cut off by the sound of dry, mocking laughter, and she frowned.


“You certainly have been bitten by that which killed the cat, haven't you?”


“What? Someone killed a kitty?” Fay asked, horrified.


“No, girl. I was simply calling you curious.”


Fay's face screwed up in confusion. “Then why didn't you just say that?”


“Because I'm weird.” He leaned close to Fay, and she found herself doing likewise. “You really shouldn't talk to strangers. You never know what might happen.”


“I know. So ...”


“Why am I so sad?” he finished, and Fay nodded. “Because my life didn't turn out to be the way I thought it would. They way I wanted it to be.”


“Don't worry, mister. It'll get better.”


The stranger shook his head slowly as he rose to his feet. “No. It won't. But thank you for saying so.”


Fay started to respond, but heard her mother calling her, and turned away to call out a reply. When she turned around, the bench was empty. Glancing around, Fay frowned as she realized the sad man was nowhere in sight.


“Fay Lee Morgan!” Fay's head snapped around to find her mother bearing down on her, a concerned frown on her face. “What have I told you about wandering off?”


Apologizing distractedly, Fay placed her hand in her mother's and walked with her towards the park exit.


“So, what were you up to, sweetheart?” her mother asked.


“I was talking to the sad man,” Fay declared, starting to skip.


“Who?”


“The sad man,” Fay replied as if that explained everything. “He was sitting on the bench, and I tried to make him happy.”


“Fay, you know you're not supposed to talk to strangers,” her mother chided. “What if this 'sad man' had been a bad person?”


Fay stopped, and stared directly at her mother. “I think he was a bad man, mommy. But he didn't want to be.”


**********


I stood in the shadows cast by a spreading oak tree, and watched as the young mother hustled her daughter out of the park, glancing in every direction as she went. I could taste her fear and apprehension, even from this distance. I'd scared her, and she had never even seen me. What a marvelous achievement. Terrifying small children and their mothers. Bravo to me.


A faint smile twisted my lips at the memory of the girl. There had been no fear in her, none at all. It was a refreshing experience, but it was a lie. If that little girl had known even one-tenth of my sins, she would have fled without a moment's hesitation. She wouldn't have cared, wouldn't have tried to cheer up a total stranger for no reason other than wanting to help.


Was I ever that innocent? That sweet? Or was I always a monster, an abomination? Was the childhood I had, flawed as it was, a total lie? I silently wished the girl good luck. May life treat her better than it has treated me. And may she never have the misfortune to cross my path again.


Mother and daughter pass from my sight, and I return my eyes to the witches. I stand there, hidden in the shadows, watching as they laugh and play, every movement heavy with the love they feel for each other. I watch them, and dream of what I have lost, and what I hope to gain.


Love. It is what drives us, every one. We struggle to gain it, we fight to keep it, and we sink to depths unthought of to avenge its loss. Even I am not immune to love's siren call, despite my best efforts. I have burned and scourged my soul for two decades now, seeking to purge myself of weakness, to reforge myself as a living weapon. But I still feel love.


At least, I think it is love. I'm no longer sure, to tell the truth. It has been so long since I regarded any living thing as anything other than a tool, to be used and abandoned once it had outlived it's usefulness. Perhaps it isn't love I feel for the witch.


I love Willow Rosenberg, as best as I am able. Yet, I also hate her, for what she has done to me. The two conflicting emotions are like fire and ice inside me, two polar opposites at total war with one another, and it confuses me. I do not like confusion. Were she anyone else, I would simply kill her and be done with it.


Ever since It happened, I have lived with a sense of pure certainty. I have known my path, known what it was I sought. Every waking moment was spent working towards that goal. That certainty is what kept me going, gave me the strength to betray everything that I once believed in, everything I once fought to protect. It is what gave me the strength to remake myself as an abomination, a despicable monster. And that certainty is beginning to falter.


It is because of her; I know this. She is the reason that I do this, the reason that I have done it all, but now that I am so close, I begin to doubt myself. I could leave. I could walk away, abandon all my thoughts of vengeance, abandon everything that I have worked for. I could try to move on, accept fate, forge a new life for myself. I could leave Rosenberg and Maclay alone, to live their lives and grow old together.


I could do all of this. But I won't. I can't. Long ago, I made a choice, and I will not betray that choice. I cannot say whether or not I made the right choice, but even now, riddled with doubt, I would make the same choice again. I have no other option. I have nothing else left.


I will remake the world. I will make the wrong things right. And the witches are the key to everything I seek to achieve. They are all I have left. So I stay in the shadows, cold and alone, and spy upon their happiness. For I know it will not last.


To be continued ...


A/N : Bonus points to anyone who can guess where I got the name of the little girl from. Let me know if you want a hint.
Last edited by Darth Pacula on Thu Nov 17, 2005 12:17 am, edited 2 times in total.
That’s right: In order to make this event LESS popular, the female activists take off their tops and jog in front of onlookers. - Scott Adams, regarding the Running of the Bulls in Pamplona.
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Re: New Fic - At Any Cost. (Updated 06 Oct)

Postby AntigoneUnbound » Thu Oct 06, 2005 6:05 am

Ooh! Dibs! Yay me!!!

But seriously folks...First of all, I think Fay Lee Morgan comes from Morgan LeFay (sp?), of Arthurian fame and infamy. (Liked "Mists of Avalon" far more than the usual telling.)

Good heavens, Paul--who is this creature? Could it possibly be some altered version of Willow herself? No...I'm sticking with my original hypothesis.

As much as I'm intrigued by TUEs identity, I'm also just fascinated by his (her?) process. The exchange in the park was so illuminating: he could have easily killed the child and never been discovered. There's a purposefulness to his destruction, but he's also admitted loving carnage. So it would have been conceivable that a monster would have killed her just to kill her. But he didn't. Your description of that scene, by the way, was wonderful. Her eyes, unable to hold him as if his face were covered with butter; sliding off of him so that his aura was all she could hold onto? So good...

And for some reason I just loved this:
“What? Someone killed a kitty?” Fay asked, horrified.


I know, it sounds weird--but it was just so perfectly cadenced. She doesn't know the sayng, but she recognizes the key words and puts 2 and 2 together in such a delightful way. Yeah..weird...

Intriguing little glimpses into their psyches, too. Both of them seem just a little...off. Not completely; not as if they're possessed; but Willow wakes up actually swearing about Tara's concern? And is Tara's concern strictly a function of her mother's death? That would certainly be understandable, but you've created this world where things are not quite what they seem and so while we are in their minds, we can't see where all the contents come from.

So loving this, Paul--kudos to you! And thanks for the info on Pyrrhus. I'd refer our idiot President to the story, but I'd have to create a special book just for him--lots of pictures and tiny, tiny words.

Thanks so much for a great story~
Mary
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Re: New Fic - At Any Cost. (Updated 06 Oct)

Postby AlysonGoddess » Thu Oct 06, 2005 2:28 pm

Hey!! I really like this story!! I cant believe i havnt read this before.. i sound like a broken record haha ive said that to a few fics already that i havnt read. I really like this story so far.. My prediction is that the person trying to come between tara and willow is oz but thats just my guess who knows im prolly wrong but whatever.. anyway i love this story and update soon please!! Thanks for the wonderful update!!

xPeace Outx

ERin
"No candles?...Well I brought one..it's ExtraFlamey" Willow, New Moon Rising
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Re: New Fic - At Any Cost. (Updated 06 Oct)

Postby grimlock72 » Thu Oct 06, 2005 4:16 pm

Heh, I loved the butt-biting discussion with Buffy and Giles.. poor Giles :) Willow is somewhat right with going out to picnic, they can't possibly stay indoors all the time, while knowing next to nothing.

And just when the scoobies were about to give up looking for any big evil, big evil feels the need to burn lots of demons in a warehouse (yetmore fysical evidence) ... smart :lol. That went way to easy anyway, surely not ALL the demons in Sunnydale are that stupid??

Lots of interesting thoughts of Mr. Nameless. He seems to feel rather sorry for himself, blaming primairly Willow for himself being evil. I wonder what kind of twisted logic will be required to understand his logic for that. Given that I *like* Willow I doubt I'll understand it, heh.

I enjoyed the Fay/Nameless talk, such a young unspoiled child.. just wanting to help a stranger. The fact that he didn't kill her (coupled with the jogging woman much earlier he didn't kill her either) seems to indicate that he doesn't purely kill for fun. Even though he might have convinced himself he likes to kill, it doesn't show.

I keep wondering why Nameless would need a knife to kill Willow and Tara in that park. I just don't see the need for that weapon, unless it's highly specific for that purpose, whatever that might be. (let me guess, you're not telling?? :lol )

Interesting that Tara almost noticed Nameless (and he failed to notice that himself), but given that a five year old could see him I have to say I'm somewhat dissappointed Tara didn't see more/better. She has been trained in seeing aura's by her mother I think.. but detection of anything is better than nothing.

Fay's best friend's name confused the hell out of me.... Jess ?? The only Jess I know in Sunnydale died years ago, so that was sort of weird :) For a second I though we were going to get description of Nameless' childhood there.

Fay is a bit too optimistic and trusting of the world
"I think he was a bad man, mommy. But he didn't want to be."
That is indeed how Nameless sees himself, somehow being forced into being bad. Well unless he specifies WHY he sees himself as a victim I'm not falling for it. In fact it makes me dislike Nameless even more, not even having the guts to take full responsibility for the evil you do, tsk tsk...

Part of that response has to do with my build-in reaction not wanting to like the bad guy, esp. not if he's a threat to Willow. Oddly enough that has not been established yet. Charachter rewrite seems to be taking effect in Willow, lets see when Tara notices and if it's too late then.

Can't say I view Oz as a likely suspect, how would he ever get this good with magic? Some sort of time-compression seems to have occured for Nameless vs. the scoobies, since his twenty years of preparation would have to fit in less scoobie years. Oh yeah I had given up guessing Mr. Nameless's true identity... keep forgetting that :P

I do thank you for the humour in the first part of this update, much needed relief. I for once can sympathize and understand Buffy, she wants to hit something... solves everything that way :lol.

Grimmy
"You hurt Tara," Willow said too calmly. "The last one who tried that was a god. I made her regret it."
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Re: New Fic - At Any Cost. (Updated 06 Oct)

Postby spells42 » Sat Oct 08, 2005 4:40 am

Paul
Sorry I'm dragging the chain with the fb, but I'm trying to spend some time in RL. If I didn't have to sleep I'd have enough time to do everything I wanted as well as everything I should. :-D

The update was as intriguing as ever. TUE has taken a holiday and it's got on the Scoobies nerves, like the calm before the storm. Willow's fatigue and Tara's seemingly uncharacteristic behaviour are worrying - what's TUE done to them?! The picnic implied that all they needed was a break from Scoobydom, but the undetected (by them) presence of TUE overlaid the sunny, relaxed mood with a chill.

The interlude b/w TUE and little Fay had me on edge until she was safely removed by her mother. I wouldn't have been surprised if TUE had killed her as she wasn't totally deceived by the glamour. Now I'm wondering about the importance of her role in the story ....

Ever since It happened, I have lived with a sense of pure certainty.


What's 'It' Paul? Is 'It' why he loves and hates Willow? Ok, I guess you've made that fairly obvious, but WTH? Maybe TUE is Oz after all. C'mon Paul, more clues please. Heh, this is fun. :applause

Anne
p.s. Sympathy for the heat. I remember how uncomfortable it could get.
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Re: New Fic - At Any Cost. (Updated 06 Oct)

Postby Darth Pacula » Tue Oct 11, 2005 4:50 am

G'day kitties, and welcome to the latest installment of little tale of woe and despair. With occasional bouts of humor and lovey-dovey stuff. Hey, if you've got this far, the odds are you know what to expect.

To what I'm sure is everyone's surprise, replies first, then the update.

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AntigoneUnbound - G'day and congrats on the dibs, Mary. For your strenuous efforts you get .... sod all. I'm a cheap bastard. :-D

You're spot on about the origin of little Fay's name. Maybe putting in the middle name made it a bit too easy? I'll have to make my next little quiz a wee bit harder, huh? I can't say I've read 'Mists of Avalon'. I've heard of it, even know they made a TV movie version of it, but I have neither read nor seen it.

Yes, creepy and twisted as he might be, Nameless isn't your usual crush, kill, destroy type of bad guy. If he's gonna kill you,. he'll have a reason most of the time. It might not make sense to you, but it will be there.

Glad you liked the kitty line. It just popped into my head and seemed to fit so well with my own personal variation upon 'curiosity killed the cat' that I couldn't resist.

Well, we know that Willow is being screwed with, but is Tara suffering some side effects of Nameless' meddling as well? All together now ... I'm not telling. :devil

Ohh, I always wanted some kudos. The next time some door-to-door salesman bugs me ... watch out! One angry ass dog is on him like ... hang on, that's Cujo I'm thinking of. :-D

The info on Pyrrhus comes to you courtesy of the collection of Encyclopedia Britannica within arms reach of my chair. :lol about your comments on Dubya. You could summarize it like this.

Winning good.
All your soldiers dying bad.
You = idiot.

Thanks for your comments, Mary. I always appreciate them.

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AlysonGoddess - Well, g'day to you, Erin, and welcome. :wave I'm glad you're liking it so far. Hopefully you'll like this next bit too. Don't worry about sounding like a broken record. If any of the other writers on the board are like me, it's a kick that anyone takes the time to leave feedback of any kind, so thanks.

Well, Oz does seem to be a popular choice now doesn't he. I wonder why that is?

Anyhoo, the next update is coming right up, so is that fast enough for you?

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grimlock72 - G'day Grimmy.

Don't worry, starting with this update, Nameless is going to start hitting some serious opposition to his little scheme. Somehow though, I don't think you'll like the newcomers any more than you do Nameless himself.

Yeah, he seemed a little self pitying in the last update. And his reasons for blaming Willow still haven't been revealed, so you're right to view them with suspicion. That's the point of using first person perspective for Nameless. The reader only sees things from his perspective, which might not bear a whole lot of similarity to reality.

Like you've said before, some of his actions don't really fit with his own 'evil to the core' self image, so you're right to wonder how much of that is Nameless trying to convince himself that he's pure evil, like he's using it as a way to avoid responsibility for his actions. Or he could just be a total whack job.

Ahh, the knife. You know, I didn't really have any particular reason for putting that in when I wrote it. That being said, it might be a whole different situation now. And are you trying to say that I say that 'I'm not telling' a lot? :-D

Now, why didn't Tara notice Nameless, when Fay did? Well, Tara was just picking up on general vibes in the area, and while she can see aura's or something like, as seen in season 4, I think of it as something she has to be close to do, and she needs to actively do it. Fay on the other hand, is always on as it where. Plus there's the whole native talent usually being better than learned skill thing.

Um, the name Jess wasn't supposed to symbolize anything. I just pulled it out of thin air, which is better than where I was first going to say I pulled it from. So no, it's not a reference to Jessie, who didn't even make it to Buffy's second day in Sunnydale.

You know, it's almost sounding as if you're conflicted about my villain. If that's so, good! That's where I want you to be in regard to him. :devil Wait and see until I reveal his reasons, and his ultimate goals, and then you can judge for yourself if he is a victim himself, or just another asshole who you can feel free to abhor.

Glad you liked the humor. I try to work a little into each chapter, so the encroaching darkness isn't completely overwhelming. The way I see Buffy is that violence is pretty much her only option. Sure, she's a Slayer, but that really just makes her a living weapon. Her only real power lies in violence, and when she's denied an outlet to use her power, she's bound to feel somewhat helpless.

Always good to hear from you, Grimmy. Take care.

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spells42 - G'day Anne. Don't sweat the chain dragging. Feel free to drag as many chains as you want. Hell, drag a few balls as well, to get that whole colonial convict theme going. But you're right, there's never enough hours in the day to do everything we want to. Especially when we have to do fun things like going to work.

Ahh yes, the big question. What the frilly heck has he done to them? Can you guess what I'm going to say? :devil

Good to know I had you on edge with the whole Nameless/Fay conversation. I was trying for an underlying tension, an uncertainty that the little girl would survive, and it sounds like it worked. Woo hoo!

What is the 'It' he refers to? To be perfectly honest, I'm planning to leave that little tidbit for near the end of the story, so there's a while to go yet. :devil

Glad you're enjoying it, Anne. About the heat, well it's cooled off a bit since then, but it actually hit something like 34 in the Queen Street Mall one day, so it wasn't fun. One good thing about being at work was it has air conditioning.


**********


Title: At Any Cost


Author: Paul aka Darth Pacula


Distribution: Knock yourself out, just ask first. ( That means yes if you're not sure )


Feedback: Go nuts. The more the merrier. Unless you're all wanting to roast me at the stake that is. Then, less is more.


Disclaimers: Nope, I still haven't managed to come up with a cunning plan to convince Joss & Co. to give possession of everything Buffy related to me, so I don't own any of the cannon characters. Everything else is the product of my own twisted imagination.


Summary: A powerful, ruthless and unstable figure begins to meddle in Willow and Tara's lives, with unforseen consequences.


Rating: PG-13, maybe R at times for a touch of violence.


Timeline: Well now, it starts off just before the end of Seeing Red, but will contain elements of an altered Season 7.


Spoilers: Err ... pretty much the entire show. If you haven't seen any of it yet, and actually want to, you just aren't trying hard enough.


Thoughts are in italics.


The story so far ... Nameless has been lying low, which is starting to annoy Buffy. The strange side-effects Willow seems to be suffering as a result of his covert tampering are growing, despite the time Willow and Tara take off for a relaxing picnic. Nameless has a little chat with a perceptive young girl, and for some reason doesn't kill her. All in all, gentle readers, the pot is begining to boil.


A/N : This chapter does include some nasty stuff, including a glimpse into the mind of a particularly nasty bigot. Forewarned is forearmed, people. Enjoy.


Part 11.


“Hey, did you guys know that we have a new neighbor?” Dawn asked as she entered the kitchen, sniffing appreciably at the smell of cooking breakfast


“We do?” Willow responded in mild surprise. “I didn't know that we'd lost one of the old ones.”


“It was the family across the street? I don't think any of us had said more than fifty words to them in the three years they lived there.”


“Well, I'm drawing a total mental blank,” declared Buffy, as Tara shooed the Slayer away from the stove.


“Like that's an uncommon occurrence,” Dawn muttered beneath her breath. Without breaking stride, Buffy snatched up a dishcloth and pelted it at her younger sister. Dawn's retaliatory effort was less than successful.


“Did they move, or was it another 'missing persons' case?” Tara asked, deftly flipping a pancake that was theoretically in the shape of cat.


“Huh? Oh, you mean the family that used to live there?” Dawn asked, clarifying Tara's question. “They moved. I guess they finally figured out how weird Sunnydale is and managed to get out before they were eaten by a possessed garbage disposal or something.”


“What's this about a possessed garbage disposal?” Giles asked as he entered the kitchen.


“Sorry to disappoint you, Giles,” Willow chirruped, grinning broadly. “This was a hypothetical garbage disposal, right Dawn?”


“Oh, totally. Way hypothetical,” replied Dawn, then her face turned curious. “Is that even possible anyway? Can a kitchen appliance be possessed?”


“Well, we had a demon on the Internet once,” recalled Willow, “So I suppose it's possible.”


Tara looked at Willow in surprise, her eyebrows arching. “You had a demon on the Internet?”


Buffy nodded sagely, though the effect was marginally spoiled by the pajama's decorated with little yellow ducks. “Oh yeah. It was ... what, my first year in Sunnydale? Willow here actually dated it for a bit.”


Tara blinked in surprise at this, then grinned, deciding that this was simply too good a chance to pass up. “Sweetie, you dated a demon? I thought that was Xander's purview?”


Willow just grinned back. “Oh, pretty much all of us have flirted with the dark side, Baby,” she announced in mock seriousness. “But the relationship took a turn for the worse when I found out he was a big, scary, horned robot thingy.”


“Don't forget that whole thing where he tried to kill all of us too,” added Buffy. “And some of us have done more than flirted with the dark side.”


“Yes Buffy, please let us discuss the supernatural episodes of your love life while consuming this delightfully smelling bounty that Tara has so thoughtfully prepared for us,” Giles stated, and Tara beamed happily at the complement. “It's been far too long since I have had the chance to practice my projectile vomiting skills.”


“Check. Mark Giles down for the exorcist special.”


“Did you manage to find anything out yesterday, Giles?” Tara asked, as she began transferring completed pancakes onto a plate.


“Other than the fact that Buffy snores like a chainsaw? I'm afraid not.”


“Hey!” Buffy exclaimed indignantly, glaring at Dawn when her sister giggled. “I do not snore! Take that back!”


“So, what's up for today, Giles? More research?” Willow hurriedly interrupted, eager to forestall the wrath of Hurricane Buffy. Tara's tactic of placing a stack of pancakes in front of the Slayer was probably more effective though.


“Well, for some of us, certainly. But I saw something in today's paper that I thought Buffy and Xander should check out. And you and Tara have class today, yes?”


“Yeah, we do. But what's the situation in the paper though, Giles?” Willow asked, seeing that Buffy already had a mouth crammed to the brim with pancake-y goodness.


“There was a fire at the docks the other night. An abandoned cannery burned to the ground, and I thought that we should check it out.”


“You think it might be the work of the Wicked Warlock of the West?”


“Perhaps. Though in all truth, it's probably more of a reason just to get Buffy and Xander out of the house.”


“Cool! A field trip!” Buffy declared, finally having cleared her mouth.


“Indeed,” Giles dryly replied, then leaned towards Willow conspiratorially. “Do you have any idea how hard it is to remove drool stains from some of my older books?”


“Hey, I heard that!”


**********


“So, why are we doing this again?” Willow asked as she strolled across Revello Drive hand in hand with Tara.


“Because we lived next to someone for a couple of years, and never even knew their name, let alone the fact that they had moved.”


“Oh, that. Right.” Willow turned to her lover, a worried expression on her face. “Does that make us bad neighbors, Tara?”


The smile that Tara gave the redhead in return was a touch melancholy. “No, Willow. I think it's just another sign of the increasingly isolationist attitude of modern life.”


“Okay, so we're not bad neighbors, because ... everyone is starting to be, so we're just average? Kind of not much better there, baby.”


“Hence why we're doing this, Will.”


Willow nodded emphatically. “Yep, one small step for us, one giant ... okay so it's more of a tiny, baby, ant-step for mankind, but hey, we've all got to start somewhere, right?”


“Right,” Tara replied, pulling her beloved into a one-armed embrace as they walked. “You have such a big heart, Willow. That's one of the reasons that I love you so much.”


“Is another one because I'm so hot, and I have an unusually talented and dexterous tongue?” Willow asked, grinning cheekily.


“Well, it's right up there on the list, sweetie.”


“Ohh!” Willow exclaimed happily. “You have a list? I like lists. What else is on it?”


“I'll tell you later,” Tara promised, hooded eyes promising that the conversation would be a long and spirited one. Willow felt a twinge of warmth in her loins at the idea hinted at in Tara's warm blue eyes, and contemplated sweeping the blonde off her feet and carrying her back to their bedroom straigh away. But ... class! Phooey!


Together, the two women walked up the steps to the porch of their new neighbor, and Willow rapped lightly on the front door. Stepping back, they waited for a reaction that was not long in coming.


“Hold on, I'm coming!” called out a faint voice from inside the house, and Willow grinned as she heard the sound of running footsteps. Her smile slipped, replaced by a worried frown as she heard a loud crash and thump, followed swiftly by the sound of pained swearing.


The voice got closer, mumbling vague imprecations beneath it's breath, until there was the sound of another collision.


“Gah! Damn it!” the voice exclaimed, and Willow exchanged a slightly worried look with Tara.


The front door swung open, revealing a man in his mid-thirties with red-gold hair, hopping on one foot and rubbing at a painful-looking red spot on his forehead.


“Hello there!” he greeted both women cheerfully. “Sorry I took so long, but what with the moving and all, I've got boxes everywhere. Not a good combination when you're as clumsy as I am. So ... what can I do for you lovely ladies?”


“Are you okay?” Tara asked, concern apparent in both her voice and expression.


“Pffft! It'll take more than a stubbed toe and a little blow to the head to stop me, Ms ...”


“Oh, sorry. I'm Tara Maclay.”


“I'm Willow Rosenberg. We live just across the street, thought we would just drop by and say hi. So ... err ... hi!”


“Well, it's a pleasure to meet you, ladies,” he replied, shaking hands with both women. “I'm Timothy Garner.”


Willow crooked an eyebrow and grinned. “Any relation to ...”


“Jennifer Garner? From Alias? I wish,” Timothy replied with a broad smile. His smile faltered. “Though that might put the enormous crush I have on her in a new and decidedly creepy light.”


“A crush on Jennifer Garner, huh? I can relate to that,” Tara stated. Willow turned and stared at her partner with a questioning expression.


“Can you now?” she murmured, a trace of jealousy in her voice. Timothy glanced between the two women, a faint light dawning in his eyes.


Tara shrugged awkwardly, knowing full well that Willow would make her pay for her remark later, a thought that brought a delightfully warm flush to her cheeks. “Um ... we brought you a house warming gift.”


“Oh, yeah,” Willow mumbled apologetically. She held out a large, square green candle. “Here.”


Timothy accepted the gift and hefted it in one hand. “Thanks for this, Willow, Tara. It's very nice. Real ... candle-y.” He shrugged mournfully. “Sorry. I really like it ... it's just ... you ever have one of those days where you can never think of the right thing to say? I've been going through one of those for a couple of years now.”


“That's fine, Timothy,” assured Tara. “The color signifies healing and prosperity.” Tara left off the third meaning of a green candle; fertility. It seemed a touch personal for someone they had just met.


“Cool,” Timothy replied, lifting the candle to his nose and giving it a deep sniff. “Hey, it's all scent-y and stuff.”


“That's jasmine,” Willow supplied helpfully. “It signifies love and money.”


“Hey, who couldn't use more of both, huh?” Turning, Timothy gave the inside of his house a critical once-over. “I'd invite you both in, but it's still pretty much a disaster area in there. You'd be taking your own lives in your hands.”


“Oh, we both need to head off to class anyway,” replied Tara. “This was more of an introductory thing, just letting you know we're here.”


“Collage students, huh? Well, thanks for stopping by ladies, and have a good day. Once I get this pig sty sorted, I might invite you both over for dinner or something.”


“That would be nice, Timothy,” Willow answered. “You have a nice day too.”


Waving their goodbyes, the two women walked away, hand in hand. As he watched them leave, a sad sigh escaped Timothy. “Why are the pretty ones always gay?”


**********


“Hi sweetie,” Tara whispered into Willow's ear. “How was class?”


Willow looked up and greeted her partner with a brilliant smile and a lingering kiss. She had been so rapt in the textbook she was reading that she hadn't even noticed the blonde's approach to the small table in the cafeteria that Willow had managed to wrangle. In the half hour she'd been waiting for Tara, Willow had already had to defend her hard-won territory five times.


“You know me, Tara. I'm Learn-o-gal, I'm all big with the class, and the absorption of knowledge. I'm ... I'm like a big roll of paper towels, all squishy and wet .... and boy, didn't that sentence end up in a different place to where it started.”


“I'm not complaining, sweetie,” Tara replied, eying Willow with her best attempt at a lascivious leer.


“So, how's your day been so far?”


“Not bad. But it's definitely getting better all the time.”


“Really? How so?” Willow asked ingenuously, utterly clueless to Tara's gentle insinuation. Tara smiled knowingly, and Willow blushed as she realized her lover's meaning.


Tara settled into the seat opposite Willow, placing the tray with her lunch on the table between them. The two women settled in with the ease of two people who were completely comfortable with one another, swapping stories of their day so far, and occasionally feeding each other portions of their own lunches.


As they did so, Tara gradually became aware that they were being watched. Surreptitious glances stolen around the cafeteria finally identified the source; a sour faced young man with greasy black hair. The pinched expression he wore gave him the air of either a distasteful personality, or chronic constipation. Either way, he was regarding the two women with a disconcerting amount of antipathy.


Tara sighed as she turned back to Willow, who happily remained oblivious to their state of surveillance. Sad as it was, such bigots were a regretful part of life. One good thing that Sunnydale had going for it was a general sense of tolerance, though there wasn't a great deal of variety in the population to be found for a southern Californian town.


She was glad that Willow had rarely had to put up with much of the latent, and not-so-latent hostility that people who dared to differ from the generally accepted societal norm had to put up with in the outside world. It had let the redhead retain a greater proportion of the child-like innocence that Tara loved so about her everything. An innocence that was somewhat surprising given everything that Willow had seen over the years she had spent as one of Buffy's inner circle.


Tara's heart swelled with love as she regarded the woman she loved with everything she had. Willow herself remained unaware of Tara's rapt observation, caught up as she was in her overblown tale of the inane cruelties of one of her more power-mad professors, gesturing animatedly with a french fry to prove her point.


Unable to help herself, Tara leaned forward and captured Willow's face between her hands. Willow stopped mid-conversation, surprised and then delighted as Tara leaned in to capture the redhead's lips with her own. Tara kissed her lover deeply, more deeply than she would normally have ever done in public, kissed Willow as if she wanted to consume her, devour her, make themselves one for the rest of eternity.


“You're disgusting.”


Tara pulled away, blinking at the sound of the voice, flat and cold, heavily laden with contempt. She and Willow turned to confront the speaker. It was the young man she had noticed earlier, the one who had been staring so hatefully at them.


“Excuse me?” Willow finally asked in disbelief.


“The both of you,” he snarled in reply. “You're both filthy, disgusting abominations against God. You make me sick!”


“Then don't watch us, you ... you poopy-headed jerk!” Willow snapped back, her entire body tense and furious.


The bigot scowled thunderously at the two women, as if offended that they weren't deeply ashamed of being lesbians. The pinched cast of his face only deepened, turning him from merely unpleasant to a caricature of a human being. Suddenly, he made a disgusting, dragging noise in his throat, pulled his head back, and spat full in Tara's face.


Tara sat there, frozen in shock and disgust as the warm spittle trickled down her cheek. Willow gaped at her, likewise frozen until an incandescent rage blossomed in the usually gentle depths of her emerald green eyes.


Even as Willow was surging upright, a burly student at a nearby table lunged to his feet, shoving the bigot backwards with a furious expression on his face. “What the fuck is your problem, asshole!” he bellowed.


Lurching backwards, nearly losing his balance and landing on his ass, the bigot sneered at all of them hatefully, and fled. The burly student paused, looking as if his every instinct told him to give chase, and looked at Tara in concern.


“Hey, are you okay?” he asked, and Tara nodded numbly, still deeply shocked by what had happened. “You want me to go after him? 'Cause there's nothing I would rather do right now than pound that little turd into the pavement for you.”


Willow's mouth opened, the fury in her eyes evidence that she was about to give the jock her unconditional blessing. Tara caught the incensed redhead's eye and firmly shook her head. Willow froze, trembling with repressed emotion, before she slammed back down into her chair.


Tara turned to the expectantly waiting jock. “No, let him go. Further violence wouldn't change how he feels, and it would only get you in trouble.”


The jock nodded in understanding, even if his face was a tad perplexed at how forgiving Tara was being. He fished a handkerchief from a pocket of his jeans and offered it to Tara to clean the bigot's spittle from her face.


“I'm real sorry about that,” he muttered shamefacedly, and shook his head when Tara tried to return the handkerchief after thoroughly wiping her face. “No, keep it. I'd hate for you, either of you, to judge all guys by that butt plug's example.” Bobbing his head apologetically, the jock retired back to his own table.


“I ... I can't believe ... goddess, Tara! He spat on you! What the heck is wrong with him?”


“Some people just can't accept what is different, Willow.”


“What, and that gives him the right to go around spitting on people? I don't think so!” Willow's expression changed from fury to awe as she regarded her partner. “How do you do it, Tara? How could you forgive him for doing that?”


“Forgive him, Will?” Tara replied. “I don't forgive him. I'm not a saint. Hell, my first instinct was to punch him so hard that his nose ended up on his ass. But more violence would've just made the situation worse for everyone.”


“And she says that she's not a saint?” Willow asked the word in general, marveling at this woman with whom she had fallen in love.


Tara blushed, then shivered briefly, and looked around the room in relief. “Thank the goddess. That's better.”


“Huh? What's better, baby?”


Tara frowned. “Ever since he first confronted us, I was getting this feeling of anger, and now it's finally gone.”


“I think you were picking up on what I was feeling, baby.”


“No, Willow. This ... this was rage, pure and simple. Blind, murderous, insane rage. It was frighteningly intense, Will. And I'm not sure if it was even human.”


**********


Dale Roper stomped along the corridor towards his dorm room, still fuming over the incident in the cafeteria. It was bad enough that those man-hating sluts had to flaunt their aberrant lust in public, but for that jerk to come to their defense? Must be another queer. Son's of bitches are everywhere these days, and no-one but me seems to have the balls to complain. Just another sign of how this country is going to hell.


Reaching his door, Dale yanked his keys furiously out of the pocket of his jeans. He glared up and down the hall, hoping to find someone else upon which to vent his poisonous rage. But everyone else unfortunate to live on the same floor as Dale had swiftly learned to give him a wide berth. It wouldn't be a great stretch of the imagination to say that Dale was one of the least liked people on campus.


Scowling irritably, Dale shoved his key in the lock, twisted it and seized the doorknob. Just as he opened the door, someone shoved him hard in the back, and Dale found himself hurtling forward to land face first on the floor. Furious, Dale scrambled to his hands and knees, but even as he turned his head towards the door, a booted foot kicked him in the face. Blood splattered against the wall, and Dale slumped to the floor.


Once, twice, the same boot drew back and hammered into Dale's ribs, leaving him retching and gasping for air. A long fingered, bony hand grabbed him by the hair and yanked his head back. Dale only caught a glimpse of a dark shape before a fist hammered into his face, again and again, until his face was a bruised and bloody ruin.


That same bony hand grabbed him by the scruff of the neck with terrifying strength, and hauled him into the air. There was a brief sense of weightlessness as he was flung through the air into the far wall with bone-crushing force.


Dale wasn't sure how long he lay on the floor, struggling to breath, before he managed to raise his head and caught his first glimpse of his attacker. The ghastly, mismatched eyes, black veined skin, and hideous scars gave him an unearthly aspect that chilled Dale to the bone. A thin, fine-boned chest heaved with passion or exertion, Dale couldn't tell which.


“What are you?” Dale slurred, his voice made near incoherent by the damage done to his face.


His attacker laughed, low and full of menace. “What am I? I am what people like you turn into. A creature ruled by hate and anger.”


“Why ... what do you want from me?”


“All I want is to provide you with a little personal edification as to what it truly means to hate.” Dale's attacker paused for a second and when he smiled, there was a terrifying madness dancing in his eyes. “Oh, and to make you die screaming. And please, do feel free to scream. No-one can hear you.”


He waved at Dale with fingers that were suddenly talons of bone extending from torn, bloody flesh, and his deranged smirk shifted to a bestial snarl. He charged at Dale, eerily silent, and as implacable as an avalanche.


**********


I stared at my right hand. More precisely, I stared at the blood coating it. I had lost count of the number of lives I had ended years ago. In truth, I never had the heart to count them in the first place. The nightmares I suffered were remembrance enough. After all, once you've become a mass murderer, does the precise number of your victims truly matter? Whether ten or ten thousand, it makes little difference. Either way, I will burn for my sins. And now I have committed one more.


I study my blood soaked hand in macabre fascination, lost in thought. I feel .... nothing. Once the incandescent heat of my rage had passed, I felt nothing. Not satisfaction, not pride, not disgust. I didn't even feel remorse. On an abstract level, I knew that this boy who's actions had so incensed me must have had someone who cared about him at one point. Even I once had people who cared if I lived or died, and compared to me, this hateful little bigot was a boy scout.


I had ripped him open in an orgasmic frenzy of rage, splattered the room with blood and loose gobbets of ravaged flesh. I robbed him of his life, and even of any chance of dignity in death. But I still felt nothing. I couldn't even hate him. I couldn't even hate myself.


Are my hands so covered in blood that I can't even feel any more? Have even rage and hate stopped stirring my soul?


Lowering my hands, I turned and looked at the bigot's ravaged corpse. I couldn't explain why I had killed him, even to myself. The beating I gave him was well deserved, but death? He hadn't needed to die. He had been no threat to my plans. Were his crimes any worse than my own? Was I truly so far gone?


Every sin I have committed, ever since that first murder that started me upon my dark path, has been my choice. No-one forced me upon this path, no-one forced me to become this monster that I have become. I chose this life because of Willow, because of what happened between us, to be able to do what I felt compelled to do.


I could have been a good man, once. I wanted to be, despite the darkness in my soul that whispered atrocities in my ears while I slept. But fate had other plans for me. I could have refused to play the part fate assigned to me, I could have tried to stay upon the path of light. I could have let my family help me, trust them to keep my upon the straight and narrow. I chose not to.


I chose to walk the dark paths, to let hatred and boundless rage warp me, until I was all but unrecognizable. I killed everyone else that ever mattered to me in the pursuit of my goals. I killed the person I could have been, the person that she would have wanted me to be. I did it all for her, for Willow, to reclaim what was stolen from me.


But as I stand here, in an impromptu abattoir of my own making, fighting back hysterical laughter, I wonder, was it worth it? Or would the world have been better off if I slit my own throat, or danced the Tyburn Jig? Would the world have been better off if I had never been?


Enough. No more of this.


I straighten hunched shoulders, smooth my ravaged features into their habitual cold mask. I force down the hysterical laughter tickling at the back of my throat, force it and the self doubt that birthed it into the dark depths of my corrupted soul. I stoke the fires of my hate, feel the familiar warmth it provides spreading through me.


A wave of my hand, and the corpse of my victim is incinerated. A second wave purges the room of blood, and any trace that I was ever here. Dispelling the field of silence I had raised about the room, I wreathe myself once more in glamour, and limp towards the door.


I still had much to do, and I would not let self-doubt or pointless recriminations stop me from doing what had to be done. Willow will get what she deserves, even if the price of that should happen to be the pathetic semblance of a life I still possess.


**********


A full, gibbous moon hung heavy in the sky, shinning down upon a RV as it pulled to a gradual stop on the outskirts of Sunnydale, atop a gentle hill looking down upon the town. The RV's driver, a harried woman who looked as if she hadn't had a good night's sleep in days, peered fearfully at the person sitting beside her.


Sandy hair, lightly flecked with gray, and a well kept mustache gave the man a distinguished air that didn't match the fear with which the woman regarded him. Turning his head, Isiah Hawkins favored the woman with a bright smile that didn't reach his pale gray eyes.


“Well done, my dear woman,” he stated in a cultured English accent. “You've got us here right on schedule.”


“That means you'll let us go, right?” she pleaded, glancing back further into the rear of the RV's interior. Two pre-pubescent girls stood in the shadows, trembling, as a massive silhouette loomed behind them, a meaty fist gripping each sister by the scruff of their necks.


“Of course,” replied Isiah, sounding hurt by the unvoiced accusation in the woman's words. “I am a man of my word. Maria?”


As he called out, a slender, olive skinned woman stepped out of a room to the rear of the RV. “Yes Captain?”


“The keys, if you would?” Isiah stated, gesturing lazily at the handcuffs securing the woman's hands to the steering wheel. Maria nodded curtly, and strode forward, hard heeled boots rapping a staccato beat even on the carpeted floor of the RV. Reaching the frightened woman, Maria pulled out a key and bent over her, reaching for the handcuffs.


“Though the fact that I am a soulless, murdering bastard does tend to offset that,” Isiah mused. “So I'm afraid I lied. Maria, kill her.”


The captive woman had time for a single brief scream as Maria's face shifted into the brutal, ridged countenance of a vampire's game-face. Then her scream was lost, torn away with her life as the female vampire savagely tore out her throat, lapping animalistically at the dying woman's life's blood as it gouted from the grievous wound.


A chorus of terrified shrieks echoed from the rear of the RV, as the woman's daughters wailed for their murdered mother and struggled futilely in their captor's iron grasp. Seemingly without effort, the hulking figure holding them captive hoisted both girls into the air, hands closing around their necks, simultaneously cutting off both their air supply and their cries of fear and grief.


“Shall I kill them now, sir?” asked the looming shadow.


Isiah held up one hand in a waiting gesture. “Give me a moment, Sergeant. I'm trying to think of an interesting way for them to die. The lads could do with a spot of light entertainment.”


The shadowed figure nodded, and loosened his grip upon the girls' throats enough that they could breathe again. Isiah leaned back into his chair, thinking as he watched Maria savage her victim's corpse.


“Sergeant Bixby?” Isiah called out nonchalantly, enjoying the sight of his paramour sating her murderous desires.


“Yes, Captain?” rumbled the girls captor, his English accent broader and less cultured than Isiah's.


“Do we still have that jerry can of petrol?”


“Aye, Captain.”


“Capital. Take them outside, douse them in petrol, and set them alight. The lads can bet on which one will run around the longest. Carry on, Sergeant.”


As Bixby left, dragging the struggling girls in his wake, Isiah turned his attention to the lights of Sunnydale scattered before him, and smiled contentedly. Maria finally pulled her blood splattered face away from the corpse's ruined throat, shifting back into her human visage.


“What do you see out there, Maria?” Isiah asked, his voice thoughtful.


Maria sniffed in disdain, delicately dabbing at the blood smeared all over her face with a lace handkerchief. “I see just another decadent, American town, ripe for the plucking.”


Isiah chuckled softly, shaking his head in cold amusement. “Ah my dear, no matter how many years have passed, you still remain that savage little Spanish peasant I found cutting the balls off captured French soldiers, simply to hear them scream. And that was before I turned you.”


Isiah gestured at Sunnydale with a grand, sweeping motion. “I see ... potential. This is a Hellmouth, Maria. It's ripe, certainly. Ripe with power for the right person. Power I mean to claim for my own.”


“What about this Slayer?” Maria asked bluntly. “I have heard she has a tendency to be troublesome.”


“Indeed. I have been doing my homework on this little slip of a girl, and she is indeed formidable. One of the most successful and longest living Slayer's in history, as far as I have been able to discover.”


The sound of screaming came from outside, to the accompaniment of encouraging shouts and the crackle of flames. Both Isiah and Maria paused to smile, picturing the young girls deaths in their minds eyes.


“So why are we here, Isiah? No-one is paying us to kill this girl, so why should we care?” asked Maria, scowling.


“Because I grow tired of fighting other demon's battles, my dear. It's long past time that I secured my own power base, and killing this Slayer will do wonders for my reputation.”


Maria grunted, unconvinced. “It's the killing that will be the tricky part, Isiah,” she grumbled. “Plus, even if we manage to kill her, another one will be called.”


“Not so, Maria. Did you know that there are currently two Slayer's walking this earth?”


“So? That doesn't exactly make things any easier, Isiah.”


“Just listen before you cast judgment. The Slayer in this town apparently died for a short period of time a few years back before being resuscitated. This was long enough for the next Slayer in the line to be called to arms. What this means is the the Slayer line no longer runs through this girl. We can kill her with impudence, without fear of causing another of her wretched kind to spring out of the woodwork.”


“What about the other Slayer then?” Maria queried, beginning to sound intrigued by the concept.


Isiah laughed delightedly. “That's the wonderful part, Maria! This other Slayer apparently had a slight bout of homicidal mania a while back. She actually turned evil! Can you credit the notion? Not that I begrudge the girl the chance to explore the joys of murder. After all, who among us hasn't enjoyed a good homicide or hundred? But the point of the matter is that once she regrettably came to her senses, she turned herself in. She's currently serving a long stretch in one of these delightful American prisons.”


“So, if the Slayer here is killed, and the other is trapped in prison ...”


“Then the world is Slayer free for at least a few years!”


“Wouldn't the Watcher's Council ....”


Isiah shook his head. “Those imbecilic fools actually tried to have the girl killed, so I doubt we will see any co-operation between them. But even if that does happen, the Hellmouth will be be unprotected, and we can easily take over.”


“But we still have to kill this original Slayer, yes? That's the flaw in your plan, Isiah.”


“Au contraire, my dear. In my ruminations, I have stumbled upon the secret of this Slayer's success. She doesn't fight alone. She has friends, and family. She has allies, a support network. This binds her to the land of the living, prevents the usual death wish that her kind seems to inevitably develop. Without her friends, she is nothing more than a single girl, albeit one possessed of superhuman strength, and skilled in the art of combat. And that, my dear, we can deal with handily.”


Isiah rose from his seat, stretching his lean, muscular body like a cat. “You see, Maria? It's simple. To kill the Slayer, we have remove her support system, isolate her. So, we start by killing all of her friends.”


To be continued ...
Last edited by Darth Pacula on Thu Nov 17, 2005 12:20 am, edited 2 times in total.
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Re: New Fic - At Any Cost. (Updated 11 Oct)

Postby AntigoneUnbound » Tue Oct 11, 2005 10:39 am

Dibs for me once more! In my heart, I'm virtually fluttering. (I try not to flutter bodily. That never works out well.)

Holy plot complications, Bat Man! Who the hell is this bunch? Yucky, disgusting, sadists, for one thing. You tell us quite a lot about them when you have them kill a mother and children who pose no threat to them, and use the children's deaths for sport. Interesting contrast w/ TUE in the park with Fay. TUE is still interesting b/c of his sparks of humanity, or least his quasi-mourning for what was human within him. This bunch, though--ghastly, horrific, and beyond connection. So what kind of confrontation are you setting up? Methinks our TUE is unaware of their arrival. I am very, very curious to see how this plays out...

And what a fascinating exchange involving poor Dale Roper...It seemed as if TUE was actually angry on Tara's behalf...? Or was it Willow's, since she was part of the object of his rage (if not his spittle)? It's intriguing to watch his inner process--he still struggles with this, doesn't he? His thoughts on fate/choice are compelling, too: he talks about having made certain choices, but then says "Fate had different plans for me." (May not be an exact quote, but that's the gist, I think.)

Now--is this Mr. Garner just another neighbor? 'cuz that whole element made me take notice...

Nice comment on the lack of diversity in the Dale of the Sun. That part always steamed me...Ooh, and "purview"! You used "purview"! I like that word...

Great work, Paul. I'm looking forward to more!
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Re: New Fic - At Any Cost. (Updated 11 Oct)

Postby LeatherQueen » Tue Oct 11, 2005 12:00 pm

Wow. So many things going one here. I, too, was intrigued by the new neighbor. This little introduction must be important, but I can't figure out how.

And scuzzy Dale... interesting that TUE took such a notice of him. Although the inner monologue that followed has me thinking of a new possibility for his identity. So many possibilities!

And the new vamps... so very evil. But who will kill them first? TUE or the Scooby's?

Great update!
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Re: New Fic - At Any Cost. (Updated 11 Oct)

Postby grimlock72 » Wed Oct 12, 2005 4:03 am

Hmm... me thinks Nameless and Isiah are going to have some disagreements. We don't know much about Isiah yet though, so I can't determine how much of a problem he is going to be for Nameless. If Isiah truly wants he should be able to kill at least one scooby beforing earning Nameless usually fatal attentions.

I doubt I'll mourn Isiah much either, sadistic is indeed the right word for him. That does delay the actual killing of people which might work against him eventually.

It would be fun in Mr. Garner were indeed just a new neighbour. That wont stop me from thinking up conspiracy theories about him though :)

I doubt the world will be much worse without Dale walking on it. I don't even mind people disliking gays/lesbians as long as they don't attack or hurt people due to it. They can think what they like, just control the urge to act on it :lol. Spitting is a bit extreme, haven't seen that behaviour around here (Netherlands) in response to lesbians as far as I recall. Some people look the other way, sure... but activly attacking ?? Nah.

Did Dale really think neither girl would do something in return, if so why? Tara didn't forgive him, thank God, she was just more practical. Will anybody miss Dale ????

Mr. Garner's way of talking caught my attention, esp. the "candley" part... that's awfully scooby-like language. I'm still hoping it's just a normal neighbour.

Now what's up with Mr. Nameless second guessing himself? In answer to "Would the world have been better off if I had never been?" I think my answer would be "hell yeah!". We haven't seen Mr. Nameless do anything GOOD now have we? We only know he killed lots of people he didn't agree with and has poorly controlled agression attacks.

Nameless's self-descriptions do all point to Oz, but that simply doesn't fit with a powerfull warlock. Maybe Willow had another boyfriend prior to Oz ?? Can't be Malcom now can it?? :lol

I view most of Nameless' complaining as justification for whatever his murderous plans are. He knows his plans are evil and selfish but he wants to view those as his only choice. He also seems to know there are several choices he could make differently, he just doesn't WANT to. Makes the justifications rather pointless :)

Once again Giles was very humour-full this time around. He's really to British to fit properly in a strange bunch as the scoobies :P. Makes him an easy target for jokes though, heh..

"Ohh!" Willow exclaimed happily. "You have a list? I like lists. What else is on it?"

that was fun too. I like Willow fun and happy :bounce.

P.S. I'm getting paranoid if the jock who came to Tara's rescue was infact mr Nameless. Although at such short range she would probably have noticed.
"You hurt Tara," Willow said too calmly. "The last one who tried that was a god. I made her regret it."
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Re: New Fic - At Any Cost. (Updated 11 Oct)

Postby Darth Pacula » Thu Oct 13, 2005 4:21 pm

G'day all. Sorry, but no update yet. Maybe this weekend or early Monday. I've made myself a four day weekend, so it depends on how much time I devote to writing.

Either way, I just felt like responding to feedback, hence witness me ... er ... doing just that.

-----

AntigoneUnbound - Go Mary! Get down with your bad self, fluttering or otherwise. Though I have to wonder, don't you really need wings to flutter bodily?

Well, 'Yucky, disgusting, sadists' is definitely a good description for my latest band of bad guys. I wanted a contrast with TUE/Nameless, hence why they will have pretty much no redeeming qualities. Sure, it's fun to write a villain who possesses certain shades of gray in his personality, but sometimes you just want a villain black as sin itself. Hence, Isiah and his merry band of miscreants. But yes, there's definitely going to be a confrontation, probably of the explosive kind. Nameless doesn't play well with others.

'Poor' Dale Roper? You actually felt some sympathy for the SOB? You're a better person than me then. But you've picked up on a good point. Why did Nameless react so ... vigorously to his verbal and bodily fluid based attack?

I am trying to show that he's undergoing somewhat of crisis inside. Sure his methods are undeniably evil, and his instincts aren't especially on the peaceful side, but he does struggle with what he's doing. It doesn't stop him doing it though, but I'm trying to imbue him with the sense that he's not quite entirely the monster he regards himself as.

Ah, yes. Mr Garner - innocent new neighbor, or something more mysterious? I, of course, am not saying, but I have to admit, I gave him the last name of Garner simply to put in that little bit about Alias.

The little aside about the lack of diversity in Sunnydale was actually put in expressly for you, Mary. I'd read your thoughts about the subject in one of your earlier stories, and thought 'Ya know, she's right'. So voila! Personally I tend to be a bit oblivious to such things. How oblivious I hear you ask? ( Well, I assume that's your voice, and not just another hallucination ) Let me put it this way; I didn't pick up on the connection between Willow and Tara until I was smacked right in the face with it. I might have picked up on something before NMR, but I wouldn't be sure of it. See? Emotional stuff I'm kind of oblivious to, but I do better with intrigue.

And yes, I like the word 'purview' too. I like using big or uncommon words. They make me seem smarter than I actually am.

Thanks for your kind words, Mary. It's always a hoot to hear from you.

-----

LeatherQueen - G'day there, fellow Pratchett-phile. ( Look, I'm making up words again. ) Well, everyone does seem interested by the new neighbor. Is he all that he seems? Why would I have put him in, if he's just an ordinary guy? Is he just a red herring? Will I ever stop asking questions to which only I know the answer?

As I mentioned to Mary, that's a good point as to why TUE took such exception to the late scuzzball's actions. How could what Dale did affected his schemes? And you have a new possibility for his identity? Care to share, or are you keeping your cards close to your chest for now?

Well, good to know the new vamps are coming off as evil. They're supposed to be. I mean, for soulless monsters, they didn't get shown doing too much really nasty stuff on the show, did they? Probably something to do with censors and so on.

Glad you enjoyed it, LeatherQueen.

-----

Grimlock72 - G'day, Grimmy. I think you might be right about the upcoming friction between Isiah and Nameless. You were implying that things seemed to going too easily for Nameless so far; well Isiah and his band of cutthroats are about to upset that smooth run. As to whether or not any of the Scoobies will get caught in the crossfire? Well, Willow and Tara are guaranteed a happy ending, since this is Pens, but everyone else isn't so fortunate to have such a guarantee.

Good point about Isiah's sadistic tendencies. How many times have we seen such predilections screw up the bad guy's plans, huh? Austin Powers, anyone?

Oh, please do think up some conspiracy theories about Garner! He's not just a cameo, so he does have a role to play. Whether or not that's the role of an innocent bystander? Well, you'll just have to wait and see.

I totally agree with you about Dale. I'm a firm believer in 'Do unto others, as you would have them do unto you'. But I just wanted to make him an unlikeable jerk, and the spitting incident is just what came out of my warped little mind.

What was going through the aforementioned jerks head? Who knows? I've never hated anyone enough to physically assault them, so I can't say what he expected. As to whether anyone would miss him, well, the people on the floor might notice his absence, from the lack of bitter ranting, but they're more likely to throw a party than worry.

Yeah, you really don't want to like Nameless, do you? That's fine, I mean, he is the villain after all. I'm just trying to illustrate that he's not a cartoon villain, he's not completely bad, no matter what he might think.

Are you sure the world would be better off if he never existed? After all, if it wasn't for him, Tara would have been shot and killed by Warren. Whether or not it was intentional is up for debate, but he did do that, and I think that definitely qualifies as a good thing right?

You are right that he chose to be evil though. He did have other options, and he did pick this. Doesn't mean that he can't regret it at times though. But for me, the interesting part is why he chose this path.

And no, he's definitely not Malcolm. That would be kinda hard, what with the being dead aspect.

I was wondering if anyone would suspect the jock. Good to know I can always rely on you, Grimmy.

-----

On a side note, did everybody understand the 'Tyburn Jig' reference Nameless made? I'm just curious.

Bye for now kitties,
Paul.
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Re: New Fic - At Any Cost. (Updated 11 Oct)

Postby grimlock72 » Fri Oct 14, 2005 3:33 pm

Well since you asked specifically, no I didn't get the Jig reference at the time. I just assumed it had something to do with Nameless being killed . And indeed it has:
Tyburn was commonly invoked in euphemisms for capital punishment – for instance, "to take a ride to Tyburn" was to go to one's hanging, "Lord of the Manor of Tyburn" was the public hangman, "dancing the Tyburn jig" was the act of being hanged, and so on.


I maintain that the world as a whole (including demon dimensions which I assume Nameless did as well) would indeed have been better of without Mr. Nameless. By his own account he killed tens if not hundred of thousands of people and ain't regretting it much (he regrets the effect it has had on him, but thats about it). A famous Spock saying comes to mind... but anyway, Tara would (or will) be torn about whatever Nameless did to save her. He did change the fabric of time and thus crossed several laws of Wicca. Willow doesn't mind bending the rules a bit to get what she needs, but Tara is a bit more strict (comes with a nature Wicca upbringing I suppose;-).

Besides, he only saved Tara to use her later. I don't know for what yet, but I do know he didn't save her out of the goodness of his heart (if present).

At least Nameless is doubting himself before he does anything really bad to Willow or Tara. Having doubts afterwards would be rather pointless (again with the self-pity), lots of real-life villains do that however. The problem for me is that I have no idea why he chose this path to begin with, as such I find it very hard to sympathize or understand the following choices (and no, it doesn't help I don't really want to either, but knowledge is usefull:)).

You're allowed four days off by the way, don't have update at high-speed and skip Real Life altogether :). That's bad for long-term writers I'm told, so better not.

Should be interesting what a vampire and two muscled-up men can do against a warlock with significant powers. For some reason I don't see much of a challenge yet :lol. Did I mention I find it strange Willow doesn't sense such large outbursts of dark magic ?? Probably did.

Hmm.. on the evilness scale Sarge and company have almost passed Nameless already, in their first 10 minutes in town. Depends a bit on how you view demons overall, some are/were good no doubt.

Have a fun weekend :wave

Grimmy
"You hurt Tara," Willow said too calmly. "The last one who tried that was a god. I made her regret it."
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Re: New Fic - At Any Cost. (Updated 11 Oct)

Postby Emms » Sat Oct 15, 2005 10:14 am

Hi paul :x Man...I am ashamed to admit that I haven't read this fic yet. But I've just downloaded the entire thing onto my computer so I can print and read with a nice cup of hot tea. :flower

xoxo
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Re: New Fic - At Any Cost. (Updated 11 Oct)

Postby AlysonGoddess » Sat Oct 15, 2005 1:06 pm

Hey! Great update!!!

I loved this quote...

“Is another one because I'm so hot, and I have an unusually talented and dexterous tongue?” Willow asked, grinning cheekily.

Haha it made me laugh...

And with the killing off the slayers friends ahhh i wonder who there gunna start with first...

Well anyway great update and please update soon the suspense is killing me.. stupid cliffhangers.. but thats what makes u keep reading so update soon!!

xx peace out xx

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Re: New Fic - At Any Cost. (Updated 11 Oct)

Postby Darth Pacula » Wed Oct 19, 2005 12:20 am

G'day all. Well, this isn't quite when I thought I'd be posting, but I'm going to blame it on the fact I kept nodding off in my chair when I was trying to write this.

Last few replies, then bring on the update.

-----

grimlock72 - Well, I see you did some research, Grimmy. Yeah, Tyburn was a famous place of execution in England where they used to hang highwaymen and the like, and the jig bit refers to the twitching a person does when they're being hanged. Boy, isn't history fun?

Well, I can see you aren't going to cut Nameless any slack, which is a perfectly valid choice. He is the main villain, after all. Feel free to dislike him to your hearts content.

Well, my long weekend wasn't entirely writing free, though like I mentioned above, I did keep falling asleep. Staying up late watching DVD's can do that, I suppose.

Isiah and Sergeant Bixby are both vampires as well. Bixby hasn't been expressly outed as such yet, but Isiah did make reference that he turned Maria. Hang on ... should I have said sired? I can't remember if they used turned in Buffy as well. Crap, I'm mixing up my vampire mythologies.

As to what they can do against Nameless, well I've got some tricks up my sleeves for them. Plus, they aren't alone; see the reference Isiah made to his 'lads'. What shape these 'lads' take ... well, wait and see.

I'm not sure if they ever had much in the way of sensing someone else's use of magic in Buffy, so that's my reason for why Willow and Tara aren't noticing much.

And I did have a fun weekend, Grimmy. Thanks. :wave

-----

Miss Kittys Ball O Yarn - G'day, and welcome, Emms. :wave No need to be ashamed of anything. I'm still pretty much a newbie to the board, so I'm just chuffed that anyone reads this, let alone replies.

You're going to print it out? Cripes, in the word processing document I write this in it's already taking up 115 pages, so I hope you've got plenty of paper. I just hope you don't end up spitting out your tea in disgust. :-D

Thanks for stopping by, Emms.

-----

AlysonGoddess - G'day, Erin. Glad you liked the last update, and I hope you'll like this one too. I'm glad you liked that line; I'm not always sure if my attempts at humor work.

Who's going to be first on Isiah's hit list? Well, that doesn't get addressed in this update, but they're not going to taking their time like Nameless is.

Sorry, but the cliffhanger-y nature of this little story of mine is probably going to stick around for the duration. Though, you're right, they are what keep people reading.

Thanks for your kind words, Erin. I always appreciate them.


**********


Title: At Any Cost


Author: Paul aka Darth Pacula


Distribution: Knock yourself out, just ask first. ( That means yes if you're not sure )


Feedback: Go nuts. The more the merrier. Unless you're all wanting to roast me at the stake that is. Then, less is more.


Disclaimers: Well, I just checked my wallet, and I'm not filthy, stinking rich, so I guess I still don't own anything. Bummer.


Summary: A powerful, ruthless and unstable figure begins to meddle in Willow and Tara's lives, with unforeseen consequences.


Rating: PG-13, maybe R at times for a touch of violence.


Timeline: Well now, it starts off just before the end of Seeing Red, but will contain elements of an altered Season 7.


Spoilers: Err ... pretty much the entire show. If you haven't seen any of it yet, and actually want to, you just aren't trying hard enough.


Thoughts are in italics.


The story so far ... The scoobies have a new neighbor, who for once doesn't seem to be a hell spawn in disguise. Willow and Tara have had a rather nasty run-in with a bigot who objected to their public displays of affection. The aforementioned bigot had an even nastier run-in with Nameless, that tended towards the fatal. Finally, there are some new players in town, a vampire named Isiah Hawkins and his flunkies, who are plotting to weaken the slayer by killing all of her friends ....


Part 12.


There was an almighty clatter as Xander tripped over a piece of scorched debris and landed head first in a haphazard pile of metal pipes, in a single instant utterly destroying any claim to stealth he might have once had. Buffy turned an exasperated eye upon her friend as he awkwardly tried to wrestle himself free.


“Do you even understand the concept of sneaky, Xander?” she grumbled.


“Sure I do,” he replied. “It's just the practical application of it that I'm having trouble with.”


Buffy sighed and walked over to where Xander was still trying unsuccessfully to extricate himself. Grabbing him with one hand, she yanked Xander to his feet with no sign of effort. Xander patted himself down, but made no attempt to gather the tattered shreds of his dignity; he'd made a fool of himself so often that Xander figured that there was little point in trying to change now.


“Remind me again why we're doing this now, when it's dark and I'm much more likely to fall on my delicate ass?”


“Because this place was crawling with cops and firemen all day? And no matter how pretty we are, I don't think they would appreciate a fast food jockey and a carpenter crowding their crime scene.”


“I'm not so much pretty as I am handsome, Buff.”


“Oh, I don't know about that, Xander,” Buffy replied, grinning broadly. “I'm sure with a little work you could pull off pretty.”


“Gee, thanks. You ladies aren't going to be happy until you've completely emasculated me, are you.”


“That's the price you pay for hanging out with a bunch of hot women, Xander,” Buffy informed him. “Oh, and Giles too.”


“So Giles is in on your plot to turn me into a eunuch? That's the English for you. Act all upper crust and proper, then stab you in the back when you're not looking.”


“As opposed to all those other times when you are looking at your own back?”


The two friends worked their way further into the ruins of the burnt out cannery, their banter continuing with the ease of years of experience. As they traded quips and one-liners, Buffy and Xander began to search the ruins, even as they remained unsure of what they were looking for.


“Would it be too much to ask to just find an obvious answer, just once?” Xander complained as he lifted yet another sheet of corrugated iron to find yet another pile of scorched rubble. “Just find exactly what we need right out in the open? A magic phrase, or .... I dunno, a big red button? Because these big life and death struggles are getting old.”


“I don't think life works that way, Xander,” Buffy replied from the other side of the room. “Not for people like us, anyway.”


“What, we have to wade through all the assorted crap that comes with stopping yet another apocalypse, simply because our lives have more meaning than the average joe's?”


Buffy stopped what she was doing, and fixed her friend with a questioning look. Xander remained completely unaware of her increased attention though, and kept talking as if to himself.


“See, we all live on the front lines of the fight against evil. It's hard and messy and painful, yeah, but ... when you live with the chance that every day you could die a violent death, everything just seems more intense. Colors are brighter, tastes are sharper, that sort of thing. It's like we don't take anything for granted, because it could be our last moment, and everything's just ... more.”


“Xander ...”


“Don't get me wrong, I could definitely do with less mortal peril in my day to day life, but being here, with you and Will and Tara? Fighting the good fight? I can't imagine my life without it. But does the trade off always have to be that things are so hard? Can't we ever just ... trip over a vital clue?”


That being said, Xander immediately did exactly that, tripped over a object hidden in shadow and pitched face first to the ground with a strangled yelp. Buffy leapt to his aid, but had to bite back a laugh when she saw his face. Blinking repeatedly, Xander's face was liberally coated with soot to the point where he looked like he'd OD'ed on camouflage paint.


Xander turned to scowl at the object that had brought about his spectacular downfall, and suddenly froze as a thought struck him. Turning to face Buffy, he spoke in an awed whisper. “You don't think ...”


Buffy's eyes widened slightly as she realized Xander's point, and both of them turned in unison to stare at the shadowed object, which now possessed a strange fascination for them. Together, Buffy and Xander leaned forward. With slightly trembling hands, Xander pulled a flashlight from a pocket, turned it on and directed the resulting beam of luminescence upon the object of their rapt attention.


“It's a ... brick?” Xander stated, his tone rapidly vacillating between disappointment and self deprecating humor.


“I suppose ... I could hit our new big bad in the head with it?” Buffy offered weakly.


“Maybe it's a magic brick?” Xander offered with more enthusiasm than he felt.


Buffy snorted. “Can you imagine the look on Giles' face if we brought back a 'magic brick'? It would make Jack and the Beanstalk look like a fairy tale. Er ... which it is, so that's of the good.”


Xander appeared to consider this thoughtfully, then smirked and grabbed the brick in his free hand. The expression of pure mischievous joy in Xander's eyes made Buffy break out into a fit of giggles.


“Oh, c'mon Buffy! The way you described that, I just gotta try it.”


Buffy nodded as she gradually got her mirth under control, and returned to the search. Xander meanwhile returned his flashlight to his pocket and cradled his brick in both hands, raising it close to his face and whispering to it like a small child.


“Yes, you will make an excellent joke prop, my pretty. My ... precious.” Xander drew his last words out into a rasp, performing his best Gollum impression. He turned to Buffy with a lopsided grin. A grin that promptly slid straight off his face. Buffy wasn't there. Frowning, Xander glanced to either side, to no avail. Buffy wasn't anywhere in sight.


“Buffy?” Xander called out softly. There was no response, only the gentle sigh of the night air.


Moving into the center of the ruined building, Xander glanced in all directions, rapidly growing nervous. Okay, don't worry, Harris. So you're alone in burnt out building in the middle of the night, and Buffy's gone MIA. Not a problem. Everything's still good. We haven't seen any sign of anything dangerous yet, so ... what the heck was that?


Xander spun around in a panic as a sound echoed in the distance. He peered anxiously into the stygian darkness, increasingly affected by the skeletal aspect of the building. As the seconds ticked by with agonizing slowness, Xander grew ever more aware that the ruined cannery resembled a semi-decayed corpse, burnt, broken and splayed open to the elements. It wasn't a thought that was helping his composure.


A hand settled upon his shoulder from behind, and Xander tried to shriek, spring forward, and turn around all at the same time, with varying levels of success. His attempted maneuver left him sprawled flat on his back, staring up at Buffy, who was looking at him in bemused shock.


“Gaaahh! Buffy! I nearly jumped out of my own skin there!” Xander finally blurted, once he had restrained his racing heart to a pace less likely to result in an early coronary.


“Sorry, Xander. I didn't mean to give you the wiggins. I much prefer my Xander with skin on.”


“Where'd you go, anyway? I didn't even hear you leave. You're worse than dead-boy was at times with that whole needing a bell thing.”


“I heard something, and figured I'd better check it out.”


“That's where you found that?” Xander asked, gesturing at the struggling figure Buffy was gripping by the scruff of it's neck. Xander used a gender neutral description for the simple reason that he couldn't distinguish any sign of gender through the rags that the figure was wreathed in, not to mention the filth coating it's skin. A hood kept the creature's face hidden in darkness, but Xander could make out the faintest details of yellowed teeth, and a bulbous, misshaped face.


“Oi, whosya calling that, ya piker! I inna the goit sprawled on da floor, now is I?” groused a thin, weedy voice from the depths of the figure's cowl. Xander scrambled to his feet, unsure if he should be offended, or just stick with confused.


“So, the hygiene-challenged can speak?” stated Buffy, giving her scrawny captive a shake.


“Ay, quit it!” yelped the demon. “Youse gonna scramble ma marbles!”


“Xander, can you understand a word this guy is saying?” Buffy asked wryly, then hesitated. “You ... are a guy aren't you?” The cowled head turned in the Slayer's direction and emitted a distinctly rude sound.


Meanwhile, Xander was shrugging. “Dunno, Buff. I'm getting every other word or so, but it's a bit like playing scrabble in the dark. Sort of fun, but it can lead to all sorts of misunderstandings.”


“I yam spaken' einglish, ya poncy tosser! Nay ma fault, if'n ya canna appreciate a right proper accent.”


“I think he said something about an accent,” said Xander, attempting to translate, “And I'm fairly sure he was insulting me as well.”


“I could always hit him?” Buffy suggested. “That might make him a bit more co-operative.”


“'Ay noow, Slayer! Dere be nay need for ya tay resort ta fisticuffs. I'll be telling ya whatever I know, I swear it upon ma dead ma's hump!”


“Your mother has a hump?” Xander asked in horrified fascination.


“Aye, what'dja wanna make sometin' o' it, ya spavined mule?” Buffy's captive snapped back.


“Hey! As witty repartee goes, this is pretty much incomprehensible, so how about you both stop, and you tell me what you're doing here, before I follow my Slayer's instincts and beat you to a pulp. Okay?”


The derelict demon nodded hastily, and started to talk.


**********


Willy the bartender eyed his squalid domain nervously. He was doing pretty much everything nervously these days. Ever since this Nameless person had stalked into his life, Willy had been growing more anxious steadily by the minute. Willy's life had never been exactly what you could call safe; his job frequently brought him into close contact with the less savory members of the demonic underworld. The path he was trying to navigate now was even more dangerous than usual.


On one side, he had all of the demons whose movements he was keeping Nameless appraised of. None of them were the kind of people to be particularly forgiving, and if they found out that Willy was passing information to the warlock, Willy might as well kiss his ass goodbye.


Then, on the other side was Nameless himself, who had already proved more than capable of turning Willy inside out if he was displeased. It didn't help that the warlock was disconcertingly unpredictable. Willy was never quite sure how Nameless would react to any given piece of news, and the fact that Willy never managed to see him coming was leaving him well on the way to developing an ulcer.


Swallowing a sour sigh, Willy turned and returned the bottle of alcohol he'd been holding to it's place on a shelf. He turned around, and blanched when he found himself face to face with the third side of the triangle of tribulation his life was turning into; Buffy Summers, and her oafish sidekick Xander Harris.


“Oh crap,” he muttered under his breath. Willy raised his voice to the point where his customers would be sure to hear. “Uhh ... hi there, Slayer.” Out of the corner of his eye, Willy saw several of his customers slink towards the rear exit.


“Willy,” Buffy greeted him curtly in reply as she strode up to the bar. “I've got a few questions for you ...”


“I don't know anything about him!” Willy blurted in a panic. As he watched the light of understanding dawn in the Slayer's eyes, Willy could have kicked himself.


“I never said what I wanted to talk to you about, Willy.” Buffy stated with a satisfied grin, and Willy felt himself shrivel. I am so screwed.


“Hey Buff, can I have first crack at him?” Xander asked, wearing his best 'bad cop' expression. Willy shuddered, remembering Harris' last attempt at interrogation. He'd rather be hit by the Slayer any time than go through that again. Why is he carrying a brick?


“There's no need for that, Slayer. I'll talk.”


“Oh c'mon, Willy! It's no fun if you just cave straight off,” Xander cajoled. “You've got to let me menace you a bit.”


Willy just ignored Xander's antics and focused on Buffy. “Slayer, you have to protect me. If this guy finds out I've double crossed him? There won't be enough left of me to fill a teaspoon.”


“And that's different than usual, how?” Buffy sighed as she saw the sincerity in Willy's frantic expression, and relented. “Fine, Willy. I'll take care of you. Just spill your guts. Only ... not literally, 'cause ... eww.”


Thus reassured, albeit marginally, Willy told the both of them everything he knew in a hushed whisper. Unfortunately, that didn't amount to much of use.


“That's it?” Buffy grumbled. “A half-assed name, and the fact that he considers us his own personal, private playthings. That's all you know?”


“Hey Slayer, it's not like we're bosom buddies or nothin'. I get the impression he barely tolerates me.”


“Doesn't everybody?” Xander quipped, and Willy glared at him, disgruntledly straightening the open button-up shirt he wore.


“You don't even know what he's planning? Or how to contact him?”


Willy shook his head vehemently. “He contacts me, Slayer. It's definitely a one way street between us, and I'm on the shit end.”


Buffy grabbed Willy by the shirt and half yanked him across the top of the bar. “If you're lying to me, Willy ...”


“Yeah, yeah, you'll pummel the stuffing out of me, right?” Willy hurried assured the blonde. “Now what about my protection?”


Buffy shrugged as she released the bartender. “You know where to find me. If this Nameless guy comes after you ... well, I recommend running.”


“What!” Willy whined, his jaw dropping. “That's it? That's all I get? Slayer ... he's gonna kill me!”


“How's he going to know, Willy? None of us are going to tell him, right?”


“Well, I might let it slip in casual conversation, over a beer or three on our regular poker night, but I'll try not to,” stated Xander, utterly straight faced.


On that less than reassuring note, Buffy and Xander turned and walked towards the exit, leaving a florid faced Willy to perform his best goldfish impression, mouth flapping soundlessly. Willy whimpered as they vanished from his sight. I am gonna die.


Willy turned around, and for the second time tonight found himself face to face with one of the people he least wished to see. Nameless stood inches from Willy's face, regarding him mocking amusement, teeth bared in a feral grin.


“Hello there, Willy,” he rasped. “Been chatting to some friends? You haven't been telling tales on me, now have you?”


Willy stumbled backwards, trembling uncontrollably, lips quivering. Nameless kept exact pace with him, keeping the disturbingly close distance between them precisely the same at all times. I am going to die right now.


“Get out!” Nameless snarled, his faint voice echoing unnaturally in the charged air. The last of Willy's remaining patrons fled silently, leaving the bartender and the warlock alone.


“Please don't kill me,” Willy whimpered, a picture of pathetic subservience.


“Willy, Willy, Willy,” whispered Nameless dryly. “If I wanted you dead, you already would be.”


“But .... I ...”


“Willy, if I had told you anything that I didn't want the Slayer and her friends to know, I would have ripped out your tongue and plucked out your eyes as soon as I had finished talking.” Nameless paused briefly, head tilting to regard the terrified bartender on an angle. “That would have been on a good day, and I have so very few of those.”


Willy let out a shuddering breath in relief. “You're not going to kill me?”


“Not yet,” Nameless stated flatly. “Let the Slayer and her lackies chase their tails trying to find my origins. They won't find anything. There's nothing to find.”


“So ... I'm in the clear? As far as you and I are concerned?”


Nameless' lips twitched in a rictus-like smile, and Willy's stomach soured. “Not quite, Willy. You see, it .... offends my sensibilities to let your betrayal go entirely unpunished, even if I knew it was an inevitability. So ... I'm afraid I am going to have to hurt you.”


Sparks of electricity leapt between the outstretched fingers of one hand as Nameless reached for Willy. Tears began to trickle down Willy's cheeks.


“This won't kill you, Willy,” Nameless whispered into the bartender's ear, leaning forward. “Though ... for the next few minutes, you may well begin to wish that it would.”


**********


The early morning sun hung low in the sky, its gentle glow bathing the quiet streets of Sunnydale with warmth. Tara Maclay walked slowly along the sidewalk, lost in a world of her own introspective musings.


Willow had an early computer lab this morning, and had stumbled off determinedly, smothering yawns and rubbing at bleary eyes as the redhead vacillated between happiness at the prospect of learning and indignation that anyone would schedule a class at 'this ungodly hour of the morning'. Tara still worried about her, but Willow continually assured her lover that she was, in fact, still getting better.


In any case, since the others still remained locked in slumber, and without a Willow-shaped pillow Tara hadn't the heart to remain in bed, the blonde witch went for a walk. Tara loved this time of day; the peace and quiet, the gentle mixture of cool and warmth as the night's chill gradually gave way to the day's heat. She just wished that she could share the simple beauty of this time of day with Willow more often.


Tara had wanted to get out of the house, to do something, anything other than to lie in bed and worry about Willow. Despite the redhead's declarations to the contrary, Tara was still deeply concerned. Her lover's disturbing physical apathy still remained, even if it wasn't as pronounced as before. Then there remained the unspoken problem of Willow's issues with magic, lingering over them like a thundercloud.


Tara sighed, then found herself smiling self-consciously. I didn't want to lie in bed and just worry, so what do I do? I go for a walk and worry. Tara knew she was being something of a worrywart; she always had been, and likely always would be. It doesn't matter though. Willow loves me anyway, just the way I am. Willow loves me.


Tara felt a thrill course through her at her thoughts. The idea that anyone, let alone someone so ... beautiful and wonderful as Willow could love her still seemed at times to be ridiculous. But it was true; Willow loved her as deeply and truly as Tara loved Willow herself. The blonde knew that this was a leftover of her deep-seated self-esteem issues, born from a childhood filled with put downs and verbal abuse from the men in her family. Issues that Willow's unconditional love had largely put to rest. But not completely.


Tara doubted that she would ever be so confident in herself that she would stop being amazed by the fact that Willow loved her, and she was going to be honest, the blonde wasn't sure if she even wanted to be. The continual, wonderful surprise that was Willow's love for her was a delight that lifted Tara's soul and swelled her heart fit to burst on a regular basis. Tara was quite happily willing to put up with the lingering vestiges of her self-doubt if it was the price for that feeling.


Looking up, Tara found that she had wandered once more onto Revello Drive. When she had set out on her walk, Tara had simply walked where the whim had taken her, with no particular destination in mind. Now, she found herself walking towards home, completely unaware of how she had come full circle on her travels.


Tara shrugged. Maybe someone else is awake by now. With the fervent hope that one of the other scoobies would indeed be awake, if only to distract her from her own troubles, Tara quickened her pace towards home.


As she neared the Summers residence, Tara became aware of a faint sound carrying upon the gentle breeze. It was music, quiet, unobtrusive and heartbreakingly beautiful. Without consciously choosing to do so, Tara began to seek the source. Following the music, like a strange parody of the story of the 'Pied Piper of Hamlin', Tara crossed the street and found herself standing upon the porch of her new neighbor's house.


Peering in through an open window, Tara found Timothy Garner seated at a grand piano, eyes closed, long, nimble fingers moving gracefully over the keys. Feeling nervous, unsure if she was intruding, but captured by the music, Tara hovered by the window and let the piano's song course over her, caressing her skin in waves of sound.


The song that Timothy played was simple but powerful, uplifting even as it was melancholy. Tara found her eyes closing, left the music carry her away, uncaring now of whether or not she was intruding. Slowly, gradually, the tone of the song began to change, the happy, peaceful aspects dropping away. Tara soon found a tear trickling down her cheek as the song changed into one of mourning, of loss, of chances lost, never to be found again. As the final note quivered into silence, Tara felt as if her heart was about to break.


Silence? ... Oh, whoops.


“Tara?” asked Timothy's surprised voice.


Tara's eyes snapped open, and her cheeks blazed as deep a red as Willow's hair as she found herself staring in mortification at her startled neighbor.


“T.. Timothy! I'm s.. sorry, I didn't mean to ...” Tara stuttered, backing away from the window and waving her hands apologetically.


“Hey now, Tara. Don't sweat it,” Timothy replied soothingly. “So long as you're not lobbing rotten fruit at me, I don't mind the audience.”


Tara paused, on the verge of fleeing, and Timothy beckoned her closer. Reluctantly, still blushing at being caught in auditory voyeurism, Tara moved closer.


“So, given the ... er ... lost expression you were wearing, would I be right in assuming that you didn't think that I sucked?” he asked nervously. “Or have I just done that whole assuming thing, and made myself into an ass again. Cause I tend to do that fairly often.”


Tara shook her head as her lips twisted into her usual crooked smile, touched by the sense of insecurity Timothy obviously felt, so similar to her own. “No, Timothy. It was beautiful. I ... I can't say that I've heard much that was as powerful as what you were playing.”


Timothy shrugged and adopted an 'aww shucks' smile at Tara's praise. “Well, I've been playing that piece for years now, so I've had plenty of practice. You know, that whole 'room full of monkeys with typewriters' bit.”


“What? No, Timothy, you're really good.”


Now it was Timothy's turn to blush, and he shifted awkwardly on his piano stool. “Um ... thanks, Tara. I appreciate it. I ... I don't play in front of other people much these days.”


“Why not? If you don't mind me asking, that is?”


A melancholy expression flickered swiftly across Timothy's face. “It's something I do to remember my Mom. She ... uh, she died a long time ago, and ... this song just helps me remember her.”


Tara felt her heart swell with compassion; the wistful appearance on his face poignantly reminded Tara of the loss of her own mother. “I'm sorry. I lost my Mom too, when I was seventeen.”


Timothy looked up sharply, staring intently at Tara. “Sucks, doesn't it?” he stated, the faintest hint of bitterness in his voice.


“Yes, it does.” Tara stood there awkwardly, scuffing one sneakered foot on the surface of the porch, unsure of how, or even if she should continue. “So, did your mother play, or ...”


Timothy burst out laughing, and Tara blinked in surprise at his mercurial change of mood. Once he regained the first shreds of his composure, Timothy recognized her discomfort and waved in apology.


“Sorry, Tara. It's just the thought of my Mom playing the piano ...” he dissolved into a further round of laughter. “She ... god bless her, she couldn't carry a tune to save her life. I tried to teach her this one time, and well by the end, I was this far from bleeding from the ears.” He held up two fingers a hairsbreadth apart.


“Oh,” replied Tara, glad that she hadn't inadvertently made some colossal social gaffe. “Willow's the same way. But why ...”


“Why do I play it to remember her? Because I wrote it for her. After she died, I ... I tried to put how I felt into music and ... this is what happened. Hence the whole abject fear of sucking.”


“You've no worries about that, Timothy,” Tara assured him, and he grinned and nodded in appreciation. For some reason, Tara felt the need to dig deeper, as if Timothy desperately wanted someone to talk all of this through with. “Was ... did she linger?”


“No. It was an accident. A drunk driver ran a red light and slammed right into her. They tell me she was killed instantly. Yours?”


Tara felt her shoulders hunch in upon herself as she allowed the memories of her mother's long, and painful decline wash over her. Timothy blanched, regret and self-recrimination filling his face.


“Tara, I'm sorry. You don't have to talk about it. I'm just an ass, I'm always putting my foot in it and ...”


“No, it's okay, Timothy. Sometimes it helps to talk about her, you know?” Timothy nodded in taciturn agreement, and Tara shrugged. “She ... it wasn't fast. She got sick, and ... it was hard. Watching her slip away.”


“There's really no good way to lose someone we love, is there?” Timothy offered sadly, and Tara nodded. With that, Timothy made a conscious effort to straighten his posture and force a smile onto his face. “Well, on that depressing note, what say we change the subject? What are you doing up this early?”


Tara shrugged again. “I just couldn't sleep. Willow had an early class, and there's just a bunch of stuff on my mind. What about you?”


“Oh, I don't tend to sleep too much, so I'm usually up this early. Did you want to talk about whatever is troubling you? I mean, I know I'm a virtual stranger and all, but sometimes it helps to have a neutral ear.”


Tara smiled gratefully, but shook her head. “No, it's okay, Timothy. It's just some stuff I need to work out by myself. Thank you for offering though. I appreciate it.”


Timothy waved his hand in a gesture of gentle dismissal of Tara's gratitude. “Pfft. Think nothing of it. But if you ever change your mind, just let me know.”


“I will,” Tara assured him, and glanced across the street at her house. “I'd better get going. Someone else might be awake.”


“Go on then. Scat. I'll see you later. Say hi to Willow for me.” Timothy made a half-hearted shooing gesture and turned back to his piano as Tara turned and started towards the house she called home. As she went, the melancholy notes resumed and followed her across the street.


**********


Willow slammed open the bathroom door at a dead run. Unable to control her own momentum, the slender redhead ricocheted off the door as it crashed into the wall, and careened into the side of the nearest stall. Bouncing off the dark green stall wall, Willow staggered, her arms flailing as she struggled to regain her equilibrium.


The cold, hard bulk of the bathroom sink pressed into the small of her back as Willow collided with it, and she took a second to try and regain her bearings. Then the nausea hit her again, and the redhead fled into the nearest cubicle. Collapsing onto her knees on the chill tile floor, Willow reached the toilet only just in time before she vomited.


Retching uncontrollably, the redhead noisily emptied her stomach until there was nothing more to bring up, and all she was doing was dry heaving and spitting to clear the bitter-tasting bile from the back of her throat.


Wiping her mouth clean with a scrap of toilet paper, Willow sagged back and slumped against the cubicle wall, her eyes still closed and her brow beaded with cold sweat. What the heck was that? I've been feeling a bit oogy all morning, but that?


Another bout of nausea clawed at the redhead's vitals, and Willow hunched over the toilet bowl again, back heaving with the force of her gagging. When the attack had passed, with nothing but more spit and bile to show for it, Willow collapsed against the wall once more, groaning pitiably.


“I feel like I just puked up half my internal organs,” she muttered to herself. I bet Tara's just going to love this. Show that I was wrong and she was right. Damn ... Willow froze as the contents of her own thoughts managed to pierce the funk she was in. What? What the heck am I thinking? That's ridiculous! Tara would never be glad that I'm sick!


Willow shook her head in disbelief at her own bizarre turn of thought. Tara would never be happy about anyone being in pain, let alone me. This is bound to make her worry more, certainly. Willow frowned as that thought occurred to her. She hated the idea of making her partner worry. Tara did more than enough of that as it was in Willow's opinion.


With everything that's going on right now, the last thing Tara needs is to worry about me being sick. Especially with what happened to her mother. It's not like this is anything serious, anyway. I probably just ate something that didn't agree with me. So ... I shouldn't bother Tara with this.


Willow paused, trying to convince herself that such an omission wouldn't be a betrayal of the recently renewed trust Tara had given her. Given everything that Willow had put Tara through over the last year, everything she had done to Tara, Willow was reluctant to do anything that could possibly damage their relationship.


On the other hand, she didn't want Tara to worry over what Willow was sure was nothing. Willow knew that Tara would indeed worry if this latest symptom was to be revealed, and the thought of causing even that much pain to the blonde who dominated most of Willow's waking thoughts was anathema to her.


I don't need to tell her. It's just one time. If it happens again, I'll reconsider, but there's no point worrying her over nothing. Willow nodded firmly as she dragged herself to her feet, her mind made up. But as she washed her face in the sink, and stared at her own haggard reflection, Willow couldn't help but notice the faintest shadows of guilt and fear haunting her emerald eyes.


**********


Isiah surveyed the foyer of the abandoned motel he has selected for their home base. The building needed work, and even then it would only be satisfactory, but in a town like Sunnydale, Isiah wasn't exactly spoilt for choice.


Buildings that could be sufficiently sun-proofed, adequately secured against intruders, and was large enough to house all of his men were in definite short supply. Isiah supposed he could have simply taken over City Hall, but that seemed a trifle pre-emptive at this point in time. Not to mention as subtle and unnoticeable as bursting into flames in the middle of rush hour traffic.


The hulking form of Sergeant Bixby strode into the foyer, snapped to attention and saluted with machine-like military precision.


“Captain Hawkins, sir!” he bellowed, fit to wake the dead.


Isiah sighed. Bixby was as subtle as an artillery barrage, but he made up for it by being mindlessly obedient and loyal, and by being as savage as a rabid dog.


“Yes, sergeant? What is it that brings you bellowing in my ear this fine morning?”


“The scouts have reported in, sir!” Bixby replied in the same tone of voice, either ignoring or completely missing Isiah's pointed barb. “All the intelligence on the Slayer and her subordinates seems to be accurate, sir!”


“Excellent, sergeant. Give the scouts an extra ration of eyeballs, as reward for a job well done.” Isiah's pleased smile slipped as Bixby stayed put, spine stiff as an iron rod. He sighed again. “What else?”


“It appears that we're not the only new people in town, sir!”


“Really? Tell me more ... in a tone of voice less likely to give me a headache, if you would be so kind, sergeant.”


Bixby slighted relaxed his posture as he slipped into his 'at ease' stance. “There's a warlock in town, sir. He's claimed the Slayer and her people as his exclusive prey, and he's slaughtering anyone who argues with him.”


One of Isiah's eyebrow's quirked. “Is he carrying through with his threats?”


“Apparently he's killed upwards of fifty demons in the last couple of weeks, sir. From all reports, he's quite a formidable opponent.”


Isiah grunted, and stroked his mustache thoughtfully. “Warlock, huh? He could prove useful. See if the scouts can locate this warlock, and approach him in regard to an alliance. If he goes for it, all well and good. If he doesn't ... well, we'll initiate the recruitment drive tonight, and see what happens. Warlocks die just like any other human when you eviscerate them.”


“Yes sir!” Bixby barked, before turning on his heel and marching from the room. Isiah turned to face Maria, sitting on a stool in a shadowy corner, rhythmically sharpening a stiletto upon a whetstone.


“Maria?” he asked in a mild, matter-of-fact tone. “Who do we have to eat around here?”


To be continued ....
Last edited by Darth Pacula on Thu Nov 17, 2005 12:23 am, edited 1 time in total.
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