It's Holiday Nightmare Weekend MKF 11/23/02

[WiccansIllusion]

Well we know what next weekend is.

Yup. Turkey Day.

And we also know what the day after means, at least for us pour smucks who work retail.

Anyways, in lieu of the impending weekend next weekend, I wanted this weekend to be a place where we can share all our retail nightmares, either shopping, or working behind the scenes.

Oh yeah it's also the first night of hannuka that friday, so lets share some holiday frolic stories with our respective, or not so respective families!

And for a WT question, what do you think they would do the day after thanksgiving? Hole up in bed? Or help Anya at the Magick Box?

Have fun prepairing kittens.

[The Partisan]

Let's see...holiday stories...

A few years ago, we got really lazy about taking down the Christmas tree, which we have in our furnished basement. Extremely lazy. January, February, March, all came and went, and there she stood. The snows left, spring came, and it was becoming quite the fixture.

By the time July came around, it was such a part of us, that we committed to leaving it up year round...

In August, my father started a new job where he worked from home...in the basement as his home office. Come October, he was petitioning strongly for its removal and/or destruction, but he was overruled.

The tree did, indeed, stay up the entire year, that year, for those keen on hearing how the story ends. Needless to say, given my father's new perspective on it, it did not last particularly long after that second Christmas.

[kukalaka]

Well, you pretty much answered your question yourself: Hole up in bed. That's a given, I think

As for shopping nightmares, that's easy, too: Trousers. Nothing special. Just plain old jeans or something like that. I always have to try 20 or more. And I don't really like shopping very much and I'm pretty sure I'm a real pain in the ass after having tried 3 or 4. But youd have to ask my mom about that.

Last time we did that, we actually managed to find a perfect fit. And I was very enthusiastic about it as I was thinking: "Hey, next time you need new jeans you just tell them the numbers (type, length...). Shouldn't be too difficult." About a month ago, I stormed into the shop I bought the last one in and gave them the numbers expecting to get my jeans and get out again. Well, think again. They didn't have them. Didn't know them. Told me they never had them and that they don't even exist. I still had them at home but every shop I went to told me there never was a type like that

I'm off to my old school now, there's Project Presenting Day (or whatever you'd call that) and I feel like getting all nostalgic.

Have a great Thanksgiving everyone!

[dreiser]

i have many retail stories for retail is evil and yet it remains my livelyhood. woe... oh well, at least i make a living out of pushing my anime addiction onto others. (insert standard maniacal laugh.)

out of all my stories, i think i'll use the most recent tragedy to befall me. i work at the new ritzy rich people mall in the only movie store in the place. basically it's a clothing mall that has galyan's added on for the "hardcore" yuppies.

anywayyy... recently we had a charity event. people bought tickets ahead of time to shop at the mall for two hours during usually closed hours. the profits all went to cancer research. so you would think that my store would get a nice bunch of people who are there to seriously shop and are in a good giving mood because THEY'RE DONATING TO CHARITY.

well, you're sadly mistaken. as was i that night. people only came in our store to demand if we were giving deals like the other stores. when i informed them the only deals we were giving were the standard ones running with the spiderman dvd launch, they looked at me like i was some sort of minion of evil (which i admittedly am, but it wasn't relevant here) for not giving them their precious discounts.

what the hell? all these people did for two hours was complain that i wasn't giving them 10, 20, 30 % off and they were here for charity, i should give them a deal, i should price match best buy, i should turn green and grow shrek ears and do a magic dance...

long story short? it was a nightmarish evening for all in the mall. the people who had it worst are my tortured neighbors at the mrs. fields cookie stand. they were nice souls and made a huge batch of small cookies to give out to these ravenous heathens for free. what did they get for it? the cookies were gone in 30 minutes and people bitched they were too small and why weren't they making more?

you know how some countries have everyone join the military? i think everyone in the usa should be forced to work retail for 3 months so maybe they can shop with half a brain and retain some level of politeness for the workers.

but i'm more likely to turn green and grow shrek ears.

-nic

[AutumnT]

I don't have a retail nightmare nor a turkey day nightmare outside the usual family stuff (which is why Nancy & I have decided the best way to spend Thanksgiving this year is on a plane headed towards a lovely vacation in England), but I do have a funny Christmas nightmare story.

It was actually one of our first holiday times together in the house we had just bought. We'd decided to spend the holidays just the two of us. So we went out and got a tree and spent that terrible time trying to get the damn thing up and in the tree container without killing each other. That finally done we strung our lights, hung our many many ornaments and bulbs, and put Christmas music on. Then to enjoy our handiwork we made ourselves some eggnogs - heavy on the nog and shut off all the lights to snuggle in and look at our lovely tree. Ah, it was lovely. And then it tipped over with a huge crash.

We now own a fake tree.

Enjoy Thanksgiving everyone. I won't be around for about 2 weeks after Wednesday. Some have questioned whether I will go through laptop withdrawl over that period of time...

[ruby]

Have a wonderful time, Autumn. It's going to be fabulous.

My gf and I are not going anywhere NEAR family for Thanksgiving, which is OK. They eat that green-bean casserole thing with the mushroom soup. Ick.

One Christmas my gf's mother ran out of room in the fridge so she put the leftover Christmas ham in the trunk of her car. She rationalized that it was winter, and the ham would stay cool enough outdoors.

Problem? We were in southern CA. It never got below 70 degrees. And the ham stayed in the trunk.

[darkmagicwillow]

The green bean casserole thing is scary! And why do people use nasty Campbell's soups instead of cream? I can eat some of their soups for a quick meal, but their cream soups are scary.

I'm very into cooking, but my skills are focused on Asian cuisines, particularly Indian and Thai. My friend J wanted to do a traditional Thanksgiving at her place, but she was too nervous to cook on the holiday itself so she drafted me to make dinner on the day itself and gave me permission to make Indian food for the holiday.

I made a very rich and creamy turkey curry with razmah (a dal made with kidney beans), a spicy mixed vegetable curry, and yellow rice with peas and potatos. It went over very well and I got my traditional turkey dinner the next day.

Of course, the next time they came over I made a vindaloo, and in order to save my eyes from the cooking vindaloo paste I made, I discovered the joys of cooking with fans blowing and windows open in -10F weather. Next time I wore goggles.

[Tulipp]

Ooh, everyone has good stories. Autumn, your tree!

As for me...there was the Thanksgiving where my sister had one menu planned and my mother had another menu planned, but then they both watched TV all afternoon and my girlfriend and I ended up doing all the cooking..... "Sure," we said to them later, while we were washing all the dishes. "Let the lesbians do it!"

There was the Thanskgiving where we and our neighbors decided to hold a round robin dinner...appetizers at one house, dinner at another, dessert at another...but we timed it poorly and EVERYTHING was stone cold at every house....

Um, there was the Christmas where my sister kicked me out of her house and so my mother sent HER flowers....

Ah, holiday joy.

[Jennifer]

Oh good god I am dreading next weekend. How did it get here so soon? This time 2000 I was working at a department store at the mall (what was I thinking?) and the day after Thanksgiving was just insane. I am never ever going shopping on that day again. I had to be there at 7 a.m. when the mall opened. We were giving away these little bears to the first 1000 customers (not people who actually bought something, just people who rushed at us like crazed kids, grabbed and ran to the next store). They werent even that big. But people love their free stuff. It was a nightmare. That whole day was just a blur of merchandise, money and maniacs. After that I decided I belonged in a smaller retail store, where I've been ever since. The holiday season last year was definetly less stressful. But I just found out that out prices are getting permanetly reduced. Starting Tuesday, we're going to be an outlet type store. Just in time for the holidays. Arg. Have a good weekend Kittens.

[friskylez]

Ah yes retail nightmare stories, we have an 8 page full color ad running next weekend and i have to work 6 days next week and 6 days the rest of the weeks until after christmas, no overtime paid cause well thats management, yea right..

long diatribe about not being able to be home for christmas for only the second time in my life deleted..My boss is an insensitive dickhead..But hey thats life...Just one more thing to be cynical about..

[mscheckmate]

Retail Kitties, my heart goes out to you. I hope that y'all can unwind after the holidays.

I've got to find time in the next few days to help Mom prepare the Thanksgiving dinner. She's an amazing cook, and goes all out for the occasion. Then, we all try to keep our dinners down while my sister-in-law gives us detailed blow-by-blow accounts of the latest surgeries she's performed on Fluffy or Fido. There's nothing like learning how to remove a dog's spleen while you're eating turkey and mashed potatoes. That definitely goes in the "too much information" file.

I'll be home for Christmas for the first time in two years. Too bad half of my family will be spending it at Disney World. Ever since one of my sisters divorced my parents, Mom and Dad haven't wanted to stick around California for the holidays. Can't say that I blame them. Now that my gf's parents are gone, she has no desire to go back to Central Florida for the holidays, so there's no chance of driving up to Orlando and meeting up with the folks for Christmas. It's OK, though, if riding Space Mountain and the Tower of Terror takes Mom's mind off the grandson she's no longer allowed to see. So, I'll probably work Christmas Eve and Christmas morning, then be off to GF's cousin's house for a boring, high-WASP holiday.

[dizzysyd(d)]

I have to do a remote at a shoe store from 8a-11a this Friday. It's going to be insane. Eek... At least I get paid, unlike last year. Last year, we set up in front of one of the big malls with 4 golf carts. We drove people and their packages back to their cars (I work at a radio station). Traffic is insane at that mall. I used to live behind it, and one Christmas, it took an entire hour to get halfway around the parking lot so I could get to the main street. So we had to fight traffic in golf carts that would randomly stop working while they were full of people who "think [their car is] on this aisle? hmmm...maybe two over?" I'm so glad we aren't doing that again.

[ChaoticBliss]

I remember the days of working retail. My first job was at Target. That was kinda neat... we got to use walkie talkies. Always spent way too much of my paycheck there. Still do, actually.

Anyway, my worst holiday experience has to be Thanksgiving of 1998. It was a really big gathering, included etended family and close family friends. All of the adults got really, and I mean REALLY, drunk. My godmother acted out sex scenes from some movie. My aunt's date kept proudly (and loudly) passing gas. Some of them played poker, and got really loud and raunchy... it evolved into a game of strip poker. The infamous drunken kareoke that's oh so popular with asian families was actually the tamest part of the after-dinner festivities.

My cousins and I spent most of that night hiding in the bedroom. It was scary. When I woke up the next morning I was surprised to find my mom's best friend's son sleeping next to me... wearing nothing but socks. Apparently they decided it would be funny to put him there. We were both very upset about the situation.

[taralicious]

There's just something about the holidays that makes people even more demanding , rude, and hostile than normal.
Sort of an anti-L-Trytophan drug at work; probably in the yams.
I was in Chicago in '95 for a "Doctor Who" convention and was watching one of those morning news programs and they had footage of an actual riot at a department store.
It seems that this store had opened at 6:00 a.m. with a new shipment of the hot toy fad for that year.
Women were hip-checking each other and there was thumb-gouging while elbows to the kidneys were thrown.
It looked like a roller derby contest without the rink.

[BytrSuite]

Well, there is a ton of stuff I should be doing but I'm sitting here playing with this site instead. My favorite is the Bookworm game and Insaniquarium is mind-numbingly addictive. They even have a pirate game, but alas, no women pirates or wenches that I could see. Oh, well.

[SlayerSydney]

Ummmm... Insaniquarium is highly addictive. I came to the kitten board to check up on things...read your post...and totaly forgot what I was originally doing.....I am easily But, I found my way back. Thanks BytrSuite for the mind numbing experience

Anyhoo...retail nightmares...that's an easy one. Once when I was in the 8th grade I went Christmas shopping with my father and as soon as we walked into one store selling leather jackets, He proclaimed quite loudly that "It smells like COW in here!" Ahhh..yeah...thanks dad. Needless to say, I have never been Christmas shopping with him in the mall since that day. I think it was actually his ultimate goal.
This same man, who I adoringly call my father, also went with my sister to Victoria's Secret one year to get my mother something for Christmas. My sister was appalled when he asked her if my mother would like the lacy thing-y he was holding up. My sister said she yelled at him and told him he needed to make the decision, stormed out, and waited outside the store for him. Too many visuals for a child to think about. I think my sister is still scarred. *shivers*

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MichelleBranch:"And when I catch my breath, it's you I breathe." ---Everywhere.

[walker(d)]

I work part time in retail and I love it around the holidays. I may be slightly insane but I prefer it when the place is packed. It makes the time pass more quickly. Plus you get to further excite the young'uns by asking what Santa's bringing them. This has the duel effect of annoying the parent who was just rude to you as you have just made the child they took an hour to calm down hyperactive again.

My worst holiday story comes from Hogmanay 1999. All the supermarkets, including ours, closed early that day. It just so happened that ours shut an hour later than all the others in the area so everyone came to us when the rest closed. We had to put people on the exit to stop people coming in after we had closed. This led to people shouting abuse at the staff on the door and threatening physical violence. Also the customers that were already in the store refused to leave. We still had people in after we had been closed for an hour and a half.

[AutumnT]

So those of you watching the game on ESPN tonight. Just know that will perhaps at around 15 degrees be too cold for me to even drink beer. And the way the Broncos have been playing during their night games you need beer.

[relativegirl]

Ah, never let it be said that kittens don't rush to each other's aid. Autumn, in honour of you I promise to drink liberally during tonight's game. In fact I shall drink for two. I realize that still won't be enough to satisfy me AND you, but I will give it the ol' Colorado try.

GO BRONCOS!

[VampNo12]

Although, I know there are Broncos fans on the board, I have to say what a football win for the Colts! Both teams (in horrid conditions) played well enough to win, but what can I say about my Colts with those two field goals of 54 yards to tie, and then 51 yards to win the game !

[AutumnT]

Yeah imagine sitting in the stands in those horrid conditions. It may be a week before my butt thaws out...

freaking overtime.

[Tulipp]

*fizzle, whirr, whoosh, fizzle, fizzle*

BytrSuite, do you hear that? That's the sound of my day going down the drain as I play endless games of Bookworm.

Holy cow, that's addictive. Um...thank you?


Edited to prove that yes, I can remember who posted something 2 minutes after I read it.

[Rosenberg]

Speaking of overtime, how about the Lions brilliant decision to kick off to the Bears after winning the coin toss in overtime? Ah yes, Coach Marty is truly a genius. Sorry about the Broncos O/T loss and your frozen butt, Autumn. I hope you thaw out before Thanksgiving. The orange jerseys looked really cool though.

        As far as the topic of this thread is concerned, this will be my 29th year working the holiday season in retail, and my horror stories are too numerous to detail. Suffice it to say that I try very hard to banish past experiences from my memory; its the only way I can make it through another Christmas season.

[Mrs Vertigo]

29 years? Good god, you have some durability.

As for the holidays Im way too underage to legally escape the ever so enjoyable presence of my family, and so I must suffer. Yknow how everybody says their familys crazy? Well mine actually is. My cousin just got out of a mental institution, and not because hes better, just because his parents are idiots. Hes insane. Literally. Last time I saw him he asked me twice whether I was Satans apostle, and once if I was a good girl. Naturally, I answered yes to both.

Apart from him, my extended family is a bunch of unsocial bastards who quite literally hate each other. Add to that the strange fact that most of them area abnormally intelligent, and you get rather scary results. And thats just my moms side of it. My dads well, I really have no idea, yknow, with him being an alcoholic unemployed (formerly) abusive ass I havent seen in a good while and whos family I never really bothered to seek out.

Oh boy, why do I sound so bitter? I actually quite like it like that. Who am I kidding, its hilarious to watch them squirm. I love my family!

[relativegirl]

[quote:0d3557e614]Quote:

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It may be a week before my butt thaws out...

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[/quote:0d3557e614]
Maybe some of the kittens who regularly attach themselves to Ruth's ass *coughpetracough* would be willing to turn their ministrations to your frozen butt, Autumn.

Freakin' missed points. Freakin' pass plays inside of a minute that leave too much time on the clock.

[Dumbsaint]

Freakin' guys in otherwise hot British porn who talk too much and need to learn to shut up and just look perty for the camera.

I have no football.

[AutumnT]

[quote:75a5a6ffe6]Quote:

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Maybe some of the kittens who regularly attach themselves to Ruth's ass

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[/quote:75a5a6ffe6] Well first we'd have to actually FIND Ruth. I've been looking all over kitten land for her for a few days now. I think she might be hiding. Or she's found someone to occupy her ..um.. time.

[Dumbsaint]

Alas, Ruth's phone line committed hari kari last week. The latest new is that it should be up and functional again this weekend.

Still with the missing of the bint. But yanno, I'm sure she has plenty to busy herself with in the meantime. Heh.

[AutumnT]

Rutro. Well that explains the hiding.

Could someone please pass a message on to her then as I will be gone by then with no computer access? Tell her that I will send her all my travel info to her kittenboard.com account listed in her profile. She'll have to contact us at the hotel since I don't have her cell number and have no way to contact her. Unless someone has it and can email it to me by Wednesday.

[BytrSuite]

Hee, Tulipp, you're welcome. I've wasted quite a few hours playing that game since I stumbled upon it. Huge chunks of time just disappear in the blink of an eye.