Chapter 13Quote:
His words would be the only shield he had, but he loved Tara like a daughter and he couldn't let her walk into the darkness blindly.
Ah, Giles, hiding behind his words once more. He's a man who's been brought down to his most basic function; that of a words man. And yet, he's prepared to use them in any way he can in order to protect Tara. Again, you're interpreting Willow as wholly dark, which is interesting because we've seen that that's not
all that she is.
Quote:
Willow had made mistakes, but she hadn't deserved all the tragedies that befell her. No one did.
Good God; that's just so very true. Sigh.
And Tara's discovery of her legacy; that was painful. Everything that she now accepts is thrown into relief by the discovery of her former identity, or is it her
true identity? I love how she seeks out Willow to ask her what's real; she might have stayed and talked it over with Giles, he is, after all, the theory guy, but no, instead she wants Willow. For comfort? For answers? Her question at the end of the chapter throws up so many different responses, and I think it was very clever of you to end the chapter there, instead of attempt an answer that might not have been as satisfactory as the yawning silence you have instead.
Chapter 14I tried to find some quotes for this chapter, but realised that I would have ended up quoting all of it if I'd done that, heh. I think what is truly amazing about this chapter is that you bring together that tentative love and just expose it to the world at large. In the daylight; without the darkness, and you totally convince me that the new Tara could indeed love this broken Willow.
The repeated phrase that Tara gives to Willow; that of not leaving her is just so very welcome here. It's what Willow needs to persuade her to "come into the light", so to speak.
Honestly, I'm kind of left speechless by the overwhelming connection in this chapter. For me, it sums up the strength of their relationship, and consolidates all the good things that are simply summed up by Willow and Tara.
Chapter 15aQuote:
Tara was her sun and she was a lonely comet that had shone gloriously in her reflected light but which was now receding ever further away from the source of its splendor.
That's a beautiful image; in light of the fact that you're constantly drawing us back to the notion of contrasting shades. You use the word "splendor" in a way that gives emphasis and grace to Tara, in a manner that I think is fitting and very, very touching.
Ahhh...interesting. That whole notion of alternate realities, and the idea that Willow would die for Tara, and vice versa. As if we needed any more proof that these two are soulmates, and yet here you are throwing insecurity into the mix, with Willow's inability to trust Tara. It's a complex web you're weaving here, fascinating and heartbreaking.
Chapter 15bThe heightened tension between Willow and Giles here is wonderful. After all that's happened, you're adept at reminding us that Willow does have a deep darkness inside her. Perhaps Giles is the only person to truly recognise that darkness. And his concern for Tara only makes his treatment of Willow all the more hurtful, I think. I barely recognise the man to whom Willow used to be close, but I am impressed by the inherent traces of "old" Giles that we're seeing here, and his positive actions in order to stave off the impending doom that he sees in Willow's demeanour.
Quote:
She had to find something in her shared past with Willow that wasn't all blood and dark magic.
Oh wow; it's such a shame that Tara is finding nothing else but this, so far. How hard must it be for her to find something positive in her past life, when she's being constantly warned off Willow. I think the
not knowing is actually more intriguing than Tara finding out and having to deal with the truth of her past. And also, to have her suspect that all of her relationship with Willow exists in blood and dark magic is painful for us as readers, because we know it's not true. I like what you're doing here with that, especially in terms of perverting and diverting what we know as fact.
Chapter 16Tara's forays into the past are really reaffirming in terms of placing her relationship with Willow, not just for her character in this fic, but also with the readers, I think. Recalling the softer times of the past, and the overwhelming love that existed is placed at a perfect point in this fic. Just when we need something solid to hang onto, you take us back into all those moments where we were safe and felt warm, basking in their love. I think for Tara, in this fic, it's good that she sees this. Hopefully it will encourage her to direct herself forward with more confidence and belief.
And dammit, you go and give us these images of how hard Willow tried to get Tara back that are just chilling and hard to read. How deep she went into the darkness, and you know, reading that, it just struck me that Willow would never find Tara in that darkness, because Tara is a figure of the light. I suppose, in a way, it just makes these visions all the more painful.
Now, I hope you'll excuse me but I'm going to skip ahead because I already posted feedback for a bit and don't want to appear like I'm repeating myself. Although hey, why change the habits of a lifetime now, eh? Heh.
Chapter 20Hmm. You know, I was actually jealous on Tara's behalf when she was reading Willow's journal. You've succeeded in doing something here that I've not experienced before, and that's making me want this new Tara to be with Willow more than the old Tara, if that makes sense. I know that essentially it's the same person, but there's still a feeling of newness about her that's perfect.
Oh I love the argument here. It's so appropriate. Especially as it brings up memories of
Tough Love, only here you have Tara leaving in anger. I love that turnaround. And you know, I'm totally with Tara. I was kind of on the brink of wanting her to slap some sense into Willow. Or make Willow run after her, or do
something, you know?
The importance of those three little words takes on a whole new meaning here when looking at the notion of love. It's interesting how you portray Willow as being in love with this new Tara, and yet she can't bring herself to say it, as though by declaring her love she'll betray the past. And yet, Tara
is her past. Intriguing.
Chapter 21Quote:
As Willow reached upwards again, it struck her that she was holding onto too much. Despair from Tara's death. The guilt for what she had done afterwards. The fear of losing Tara again.
At last! It's always marvellous to see someone as logically brainy as Willow having an epiphany like this. I think Buffy's spectre acts as a catalyst here, in showing Willow that the past is a hook that has kept her wriggling in sorrow for far too long.
The fact that she finally makes peace with Buffy, and allows Buffy to make peace with her as well, bringing in the notion of forgiveness, is a long time coming. Nineteen years, in fact. I see this as implementing another change in mood in the fic; encouraging Willow to move forward with hope. And I think that's something that's been sorely missing from her life thus far.
Chapter 22Quote:
Love was more than mere adoration. You couldn't create love with a spell; you had to make it anew every day with your heart. Love was worth fighting for.
Oh boy, is it ever. This is a wonderfully touching and emotional experience you're taking us on here. To see Willow realising that the essence of love is something that you can't control, and allowing herself to feel that is, in a way, opening up her heart to love once again. And how wonderfully you work these images of her friends into this idea, bringing together all the different ideas of love, and all the different interpretations of love into one true knowledge. Fantastic.
Chapter 23Quote:
Blue eyes met green for the first time
Ah, the moment we've all been waiting for since their first kiss, and the glimmer of green appeared. The fact that it's a stand alone sentence and paragraph just emphasises even more what a great moment this is.
Quote:
There was magic in the world, and it was more than just spells. It underlay every breath and every thought. Life was a miracle beyond comprehension. Love had overcome time and death to meet her here when she had no hope remaining. Tara embodied that magic. It was there in her eyes and her smile. In every small touch. In every whispered word of devotion.
And I think that here, you're defining and redefining the true essence of the magic that Willow and Tara practised together. In their togetherness, the magic comes from a combined love. It reminds me of the beginning of
Seeing Red, and how great that feeling must have been for the both of them. Elements of that live in every moment they spend together, and here, you're just bringing out that almost "storybook" quality that they have with one another. I love it. Thank you. It's just perfectly explored.
There's also the idea of a transforming power of love, which I think you symbolise wonderfully in the change of Willow's eyes. It's a physical representation of how love can change a person in the world, and also change the world around them, too. Love, here, is a healing process for Willow, in terms of aiding her in that grief and darkness to which she succumbed gladly. If she was hiding away from the world, then her black eyes were a shield to prevent Tara from seeing her honestly again. You take that idea of the eyes being windows to the soul and restore it, enhance it, and give it back to us with an element of beauty that feels so right at this point in the story.
Chapter 24Quote:
enclosed in a sphere of crystal made effulgent by roiling clouds
Hee, you said effulgent.
Chapter 25The imagery in this chapter is rich with symbolism, the grave scene and the mirror scene standing out as moments of giving and receiving; love continuing to heal and mend the hearts of those who allow it to do so. It's a wonderful compliment to your style that you don't take us directly into the action, but let us teeter around the edges and view it all from a distance.
The spring metaphor makes me think of T.S. Eliot's "The Wasteland", mainly because I think, for Willow, the last 19 years have been a wasteland of her own making. Just like Eliot tended to blame humanity for tearing down the sacred nature of its own mythology, I think that Willow has blamed herself for removing all the light and goodness in her life; even her respect for magicks has fallen by the wayside in light of her desire to bring Tara back. If the search for the Holy Grail is, as Eliot tends to hint at, the one true path to enlightenment, then it would seem here that Willow's quest for love, and finding, accepting and keeping that love, is her own way of achieving that Holy Grail.
Your final chapter is simply perfect in terms of tying up loose ends. I love how you bring the remaining Scoobies together, plus the legacy that they're leaving behind them in the shape of their children. The title of this chapter is wonderful; consolidating everything that you've included as a theme throughout; the light, the newness, the new day, the future. It's all perfectly encapsulated in that familiarity of the Bronze, and the reworking of those scenes between Willow and Tara that we know so well.
Thank you so much for this fic. Again; I'm sorry it took me so long to provide feedback, but it's been a great afternoon spent reading it.
"Cheese falls apart. It crumbles apart so much. You can't ever put it back the way it was. I'm sorry, it's just...you know, it takes time to eat Cheshire cheese. You can't just go for coffee and crackers and expect cheesey goodness..." ~ Cheesetropy