dear Kittens,
I hate prolonging your agony any longer so here’s the update.I have experienced the longest 'tomorrow' so pardon the delay.I'm in a queer mood.Well not that kind of 'queer' queer.More of the eerie, 'oh-what-is-happening-in-my-life' kind.
Thank you for your lovely, uplifting and soul inspiring feedback.Since I have to rush, I''ll be posting my individual replies later in the week.
You guys just make writing more rewarding.In your own little Kittenish ways, all of you made a difference to me.
All my appreciation, Sleek
***
Part 20 Revelations (c)
Willow Revelation .002 "The XanderOzQuestion"
"Willow--lookout!"
Xander rushed forward to push Willow away from the path of a tall, gangly vampire.The vampire wore a neon orange shirt that clashed horribly with his chalky white skin.
Easy to spot by anyone who was remotely paying attention tonight. Xander thought as he pulled himself up.
Willow stumbled to the ground and scampered behind a tombstone nearby.
"Shtupid."Slurred the vampire as he staggered to Xander's direction.
The vampire hissed, baring his fangs.Xander visibly flinched from the bloodsucker's stale, decayed breath.
"Err.Have you ever heard of this lil invention called the toothbrush?"Xander said nervously as his right hand inched towards his jacket pocket where a wooden stake bulged.
The vampire snarled.Spit spewed forth Xander's face.
Disgusted, Xander wiped his face with a sleeve.
"Guess not." Breathed Xander as he sprang towards the vampire, stake in hand.
Crouching low, Willow clutched her stake. In bated breath, she waited for an opening to pounce.
Willow watched Xander attack Bad Breath Vamp.Or, to put it more accurately, she watched Bad Breath Vamp attack Xander.
Several grunts indicated that Giles and Riley were engaged in combat somewhere in another darkened part of the graveyard.Anya was…well…Anya was with Willow and Xander a minute ago, it's just that Willow was too preoccupied to pay particular attention to everyone's whereabouts.
"Why aren't you helping Xander?Go help Xander."Anya's voice plopped beside her.
Willow spun and glared at Anya. To say Willow was in a foul mood was an understatement.
"Well I don't see you runnin' to save your boyfriend."Willow snapped.
"Maybe because he was too busy saving you while Giles asked for my assistance with the simple task of standing up."Anya said crossly.
"Oh yeah.I understand.Coz helping other people is such a chore for you Anya."
Anya was visibly riled by this.She opened her mouth as if to say something ill when Willow cut her mid-thought,"Besides.Xander's doing fine. He doesn't need our help."
As if on cue, Xander groaned loudly in pain.He lay on the ground in a semi-fetal position. His shin held close to his chest.Bad Breath Vamp loomed before him triumphantly.He angled his pale face towards Xander's neck.
"Hey!"Came Anya's battle cry.
Bad Breath Vamp turned to have his bumpy forehead collide with a sharp rock.
"Ow!That hurt." He yelped.
"Yes.That is the purpose of hitting you with the rock.Now please do not suck my boyfriend."Anya said almost casually.She was an ex-vengeance demon after all.And she had personally met, wined and dined with numerous evil creatures in her 1,000 years of demon living.
"Why you…"Bad Breath Vamp fixed his sick yellow eyes on Anya.His filthy hands stretched out as if to throttle her.
Anya held a short steel pole in both hands and whacked Bad Breath Vamp like a mad batter.
"Ouch! Ow! Ow! Ow! Quit it!"
"Willow.The-'
"Got it."
Before Anya or Xander could absorb what Willow got , Bad Breath Vamp exploded into dust.
"Hey Will. Nice stakin."Xander winced as Anya helped him to his feet.
"Yeah. Well. A Scoobies gotta do what a Scoobies gotta do."Willow said, indifferently.Her usual brand of perkiness was as dead as the dusted vamp.
"Uh. Will…" Xander said, uncertainly.
"You guys regroup with Riley. I got some things to uh…to do.By myself."Without giving Xander and Anya a second glance, Willow pocketed her stake and turned away.
Xander stared at Willow's retreating back.His lips pulled taut with worry.
He glanced at his girlfriend.
"Ahn.I need to uh-" Xander shrugged vaguely towards Willow's direction."Maybe you can ask Giles to give you a ride home?"
"Fine."Anya said displeased."If you need to play the role of the best friend go ahead.Even if she is ungrateful of your help."
***
Willow shivered inside her thick fur coat.
Her steps quickened as she neared the UCS dorm buildings.Her eyes became intent as a plan solidified in her head.
As soon as she arrives in her room she'll fix herself some instant Swiss Miss Cocoa and grab her laptop to help her de-synthesize her thoughts.
All she needed right now is a warm, quiet place where she can shut down and reboot.
Preferably away from prying friends. Willow scowled as she saw Xander near the entrance of Stevenson Hall.
Willow strode past him.
"Will."Xander called over her shoulder.
"Not now Xander."She muttered.
"Will, if this is about what happened in the hospital…"
Willow froze in her tracks and turned to face her oldest friend.
Xander's loopy dark hair was pasted above a very furrowed forehead.He stood there stubbornly, hands shoved inside his jacket pockets.
Willow knew this Xander-stance all too well.It meant that it was going to take awhile before she can get rid of him.
"Xander.I'm not exactly explanation girl right now.So if you please, stop asking whatever it is you wanted to ask."Willow's tone was milder this time.Though the way her chin jutted out, Xander knew she meant business.
Unfazed, Xander took several more steps until he was in front of Willow.
"Will, I just want you to know that it's okay.I mean…sure it is a shock…I mean seeing your bestfriend kissing another girl doesn't happen as often as apocalypses and demons.But if you decide to go lesbian it's--"
" Why are you obsessing about this?!Got your first fill of live porn?!Oh, I forgot.You live with Anya." There was no turning back now.If Xander wanted to talk to an ill-tempered Willow he wouldn't be disappointed.
Embarrassed by her raised voice, Xander carefully scanned the hall for eavesdroppers.Thankfully tonight's witnesses were limited to the empty student lounge chairs and a cleaning guy mopping in a corner.
"Let's leave Anya out of this conversation, okay?I love that woman.Even if I know our relationship wouldn't exactly earn the 'Normal Couple of The Year Award,' I know how I feel about her.And I don't give the slightest care about what other people think."
Willow pursed her lips, crossed her arms, but gave a slight nod for Xander to go on.
Maybe if I pretend to listen to his speech he'll leave. Willow rationalized to herself.
Xander nodded to the direction of the lounge chairs and they both sat, facing each other.
"Willow, it doesn't matter what other people think.If you know what you feel for Tara-"
" How can I know when you guys wouldn't even give me time to think?" Willow said indignantly.
"Okay."Xander raised his hands and sighed in defeat."Backing off now. But honestly Will, if you need time to thoroughly think, maybe you're not so sure about…getting into whatever it is you're getting into.When you feel strongly for someone, you don't hesitate to-"
"Who say's I don't feel strongly for Tara!!"Willow bellowed.She surprised even herself at her sudden intensity.
Xander gripped the edges of his seat and shut his mouth.
He held his breath, careful that his breathing might set Willow off.
"You guys dragged me into patrol tonight and all I wanted was to run after her!Ask her if she's mad.Hold her if I hurt her.Oh yes.I want to kiss her Xander.I want to make sweet slow and fast love to her. Again and again!"
Xander remained speechless.
Taking this opportunity, Willow found her voice to finally shape her thoughts."I love how she makes me feel good.How, even at my geekiest, blabbering moment…she makes me feel… happy …happy just being me. I love how she stills me with a look.And makes me shake with a simple smile.How she calms me.How she calms Dawn and everyone else around her.She's just so… wonderful and she has no idea…she has no idea how beautiful she is…"
Willow stared at the opposite wall.She was filled with the vision of enchanted golden wheat, the scent of jasmine and the taste of soft, full lips.
"She doesn't know Xander."Willow said so softly that Xander barely heard her.
"Then tell her Will."
Willow looked at Xander.Her harsh glare finally gone.
"I was going to, but you insisted to talk.It's too late in the night now anyway. She's probably asleep. I'll give her a call, or write her a letter or something."
Xander nodded, and stood up.
"Will? About um…"Xander glanced at his shoes before looking back at Willow."We…we had in the past… And there's Oz, right?Does this mean that-"
"Xander,"Somehow Willow knew this was going to come up."That was a long time ago. I was in love with you.But I realized you were the only loyal friend I ever had.And you…chose Cordelia.It hurt.At that time.But I'm not in that space anymore.I'm not even in the Oh-Oz-Slept-With-Another-Woman-And-Left-Me space anymore.I'm over that.Now I finally have someone who could be mine.Totally.And I could be hers…totally. If I'm not too late."
Xander sighed.The usual perky Willow he knew and loved well was too somber for words.He finally began to grasp how much was at stake for his best friend.
"Then I guess I have one more word for you Willow."
"What's that?" Willow looked up and curiously peered at Xander.
" Run. "
*** TBC
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