Ok. So first off, some small notes. I've only written up to chapter 6 so far, and school is keeping me pretty busy, so the updates are probably going to be coming slower from now on. Now worries though, it will be finished eventually. Anyways, I hope ya'll enjoy this chapter. Please note the rating change. This is the first time I've written anything like this, so I really hope I did alright. Once again, I hope you all enjoy it 
Title: Tabula Rasa Perpetua
Author: TazRaven
Distribution: Anyone who wants to use it, just ask.
Feedback: Yes, please. I love it.
Disclaimers: Willow and Tara and the rest of the Buffy gang and Buffyverse are not mine, but I wish they were.
Summary: The Buffy gang has to live with the effects of the Tabula Rasa spell a little longer than what originally happened.
Rating: NC-17
Timeline: Everything up until The Tabula Rasa spell is the same. The changes start happening a little bit into the spell.
Author's Notes: Tabula Rasa Perpetua = Perpetually Clean Slate
Tabula Rasa Perpetua
Chapter 5- Passion
“Wow.” Joan opened and closed her mouth. “Wow,” she said again.
Dawn blinked her eyes, her mouth also shutting with an audible snap. In the center of the room, Willow and Tara were still surrounded by floating rose petals, their lips connected in a passionate kiss. They slowly parted, their eyes opening to gaze at each other. Instead of separating fully, they leaned forward once more to rest their foreheads against each other. Willow had a goofy grin plastered across her face, while Tara was wearing a half-smile. Dawn finally pulled out of her trance and rose from the bench to walk across the room. The movement snapped Willow and Tara from their moment, causing them to part and stand up slowly. The action caused their concentration to waiver. The rose petals, that had until then been suspended in circular pattern in the air, once again obeyed the rules of gravity. They fell to the ground, as did the now bare stem.
Willow looked down at their still conjoined hands before moving her gaze upwards into Tara’s eyes. Tara winked at her and turned her eyes briefly towards the doorway. She giggled at the sight. Dawn was energetically waving a hand in front of Alex, who was sporting a glazed look. Joan still looked similar to a fish.
Directing her stare back towards Willow’s own, she smiled again and squeezed Willow’s hands. “So, you know what this means,” Tara said, a teasing smile gracing her face.
Willow’s smile turned into a small pout, a confused look settling in her eyes. She shook her head. “Um, no?”
Tara leaned closer, letting her breath mingle with Willow’s. “It means,” she whispered, “that you’re magic.” She smiled at Willow’s intake of breath and then pressed her lips to Willow’s briefly. Tara pulled back, happy to see Willow sporting a glazed look of her own.
“So, guess we have two witches in the family,” Joan said, her mouth finally having stopped resembling a guppy’s. She slapped Alex on the arm and was pleased when he stopped looking at Willow and Tara, instead turning to glare at Joan while rubbing his now injured limb.
“Jeez, Joan. You do have super powers, remember?” He grimaced, knowing that he would probably have a hand-shaped bruise on his shoulder tomorrow.
The front door of the shop opened, signified by the ringing of the small bell at the top of the frame. The group left the back room, Willow and Tara trailing behind, their fingers still intertwined. Anya stood at the front of the shop, a confused expression on her face. “Why were you all back there? Did I miss anything?”
Willow and Tara blushed while Dawn and Joan laughed loudly. Alex regained his glassy eyed look as Anya tilted her head to the side as if trying to examine the situation from another point of view. Looking behind Alex, she saw Willow and Tara still holding hands. “Oh, I get it. Did the lesbians have sex or something?”
Tara turned even brighter shades of red, her complexion matching something akin to a strawberry. Both Dawn and Joan stopped laughing immediately while Alex seemed to retreat even farther into his fantasy. Willow couldn’t seem to speak properly, her anger at Anya hindering intelligent thought. “You…what…I can’t…oh, Goddess.” She shook her head and looked over at Tara, but the sight just enraged her more. She stepped forwards, intending to beat the tactless woman, but was instead stopped by two exceedingly strong arms holding her in place. Joan held Willow back, but was surprised to find that it was actually slightly difficult. The red-head’s anger had infused her with some super powers of her own.
“Anya, please. Just apologize to the nice witch,” Alex pleaded.
“Oh, you’re a witch?” She paused and moved her attention to Tara. “Is she a witch too? Were you two doing a spell?” She leered at the blonde Wicca in the back, secretly finding it amusing to aggravate Willow.
“Ok then!” Joan shouted slightly, trying to change the subject in order to keep Willow from murdering Anya. “How’s Rupert then? Doing good?”
Anya frowned for a moment, saddened that she could not continue playing with Willow, but then regained her smile as she thought about her earlier act of vengeance. “Oh, yes. He woke up once, but then I hit him over the head when he said he was leaving me. The bedpan worked quite well.” She smiled brightly, her eyes sparkling at the memory. Taking in the shocked expressions of the group, she sighed loudly. “Oh, don’t worry. It was empty.” She paused again, confused when she saw the even more stunned expressions on their faces. “Oh, I get it. You wanted to know if he’d be ok. That jerk will be fine. He’s just staying overnight for observation but we can get him tomorrow.”
Willow stared slack jawed at Anya, unable to believe the things she was saying. “We should separate. Do research back at our separate houses.” At Joan’s confused look she gave her pleading eyes. “Now. Please.” Joan finally recognized the request for what it was; a plea for help to get away from the infuriating woman for a little while.
“Sounds like a good plan actually.” Joan smiled at Willow and winked at her, glad to be of help. “How about we head to our respective homes and then meet at my house tomorrow morning. We can compare notes.” Alex, Tara and Dawn nodded their heads in silent agreement.
Alex looked over at Anya and smiled, secretly excited that she and Rupert had a fight. He cleared his throat and walked closer to Anya. “Do you need a place to stay?”
Anya stared into his eyes for a moment and then returned the smile. “Yes, that would be fine. I’m not sure where I live and I don’t want to stay another night in the hospital sleeping in a chair next to my ex-fiancé.”
Alex did an internal happy dance and turned back to the group. Willow looked at him, confused as to why anyone would offer Anya a place to stay. She shook her head and walked back towards Tara, Joan having already released her. Willow smiled at Tara, whose face had almost returned to its normal color, and took her hand once more, intertwining their fingers. Tara returned the smile with a slight one of her own, still too embarrassed to manage much more. Joan looked around, pleased that the mini-apocalypse had been diverted and walked over to the table, gathering up the books they had been reading. She handed several to Alex and Anya while still managing to hold back a hefty number for her group.
“So, tomorrow then? Around ten o’clock?” Alex and Anya nodded and then left the shop, the bell once again announcing the door’s movement.
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Alex and Anya walked out of the shop. He walked over to the car that he had found last night at his apartment complex. Last night, at realizing that his key ring held car keys, he walked out into the tenant parking lot and pressed the alarm. He opened the passenger door for Anya and smiled as she sat down. Closing the door quickly, he walked to his side, getting in and buckling his seat belt.
Alex turned the key in the ignition and moved the car into drive. Ten minutes later, the car was parked and Alex was leading Anya up to his apartment. He unlocked the door and pushed it open for Anya. She stepped inside and walked to the center of the living room.
“This is very nice, Alex.” She smiled at him and then walked into the kitchen. Alex followed behind her. He had intended to show her the apartment anyway; he had just assumed he would be the one leading the tour. She opened the fridge and peered inside. She picked up the same piece of cheese Alex had the night before and smelled it. Her face lit up with a smile as she broke off a piece and tasted it. Her smile brightened with her obvious appreciation for the dairy product.
Alex watched with curiosity. Having already tried the disgusting piece of food yesterday, he was already confused as to why it was in his fridge. His mind slowly made the connection and a light bulb went off inside his brain. He suddenly grabbed Anya’s hand and pulled her towards the bedroom. She looked at him, a startled expression on her face, and a piece of foul-smelling cheese in her other hand. “What are you doing?” she asked.
Alex walked over to the dresser and pulled out the women’s lingerie he had found the night before. He thrust it in Anya’s direction. She looked at him, once again exceedingly confused. “You wanted to show me your drag costume?”
Alex sighed and shook his head. “Just try it on.”
Anya shrugged her shoulders and grabbed the garment. She walked into the bathroom and returned minutes later, her casual clothes now replaced with lacy pajamas. She looked down at her ensemble and then up at Alex. “I wasn’t engaged to Rupert, was I?”
Alex felt his mouth go dry as he gazed at Anya. He cleared his throat. “I don’t think so.” He moved forward and stopped inches from Anya.
Anya looked up at him, her eyes finding the brown of his and smiled. “Then the engagement isn’t off.” She leaned closer to him.
Alex shook his head and leaned closer as well. Their lips met in the middle, and the only thing Alex could think was that it was like coming home.
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Joan turned to look at the rest of the women. “Well then, that was fun, what with Willow about to kill Anya and all.” Willow gave her an un-amused glare and she countered with a sheepish smile. “It’s sunny out and I think I remember how to get back. You guys mind walking?”
Tara finally regained the ability to talk and vocalized her agreement. “A walk sounds great.” She smiled brightly at Willow and squeezed her hand. The two women walked out of the shop hand-in-hand, oblivious to the outside world. Dawn followed them, unexplainably happy for the two women who so obviously liked each other. Joan smiled and left the shop, pausing to lock the door with the spare key Anya had left her last night. She followed the group and basked in their good spirits, the sun warming her face as she walked down the street.
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“You should go, until we figure all of this out.”
Randy looked at Joan from his cot. He had spent all day down in the basement, hiding from the sun while the rest of the group had researched. It was a little past sun down; time for him to go pay a visit to the butcher’s. “Bollocks. I can help, and you know it.”
“Help with what?” Joan asked. “We don’t even know what’s going on.”
“Well, ya. But what am I supposed to do? Go find a crypt and wait for you to come round, tell me when we’ve got a chance at getting our memories back?”
“Um, that was my general plan.” Joan smiled slightly and shrugged her shoulders. “Look, we’ve already got our hands full with the research. I really don’t want to try explaining the whole ‘vampire with a soul’ thing to them.”
Randy opened his mouth to argue but Joan stopped him with a raised hand. “It would just be easier if you go somewhere else until we figure something out. Get some blood from the butcher’s, kill evil vampires, do whatever. Ok?”
Randy stared hard at Joan for a few moments and then nodded his head. He picked up his brown tweed coat and stood up from the cot. He walked up the stairs but stopped near the top and turned around. “You know what I was thinking last night?” Joan shook her head and he continued. “Your name, Joan. Doesn’t suit you at all.”
She smiled. “I looked through some books last night. My name’s not Joan. It’s Buffy.” She smiled again and shrugged her shoulders. “I liked Joan better.”
“Buffy, huh? Now that suits you.” He returned the smile with a slight one of his own and then turned around. He walked up the rest of the stairs, turned the corner, and disappeared out of sight.
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Willow reached her arm out in an attempt to pull Tara closer. She grumbled when her arm failed to make contact. Peeking open her eye slightly, she cast a glance towards the other side of the bed and grumbled again as she realized Tara was no longer in bed. She rubbed her eyes and sat up. “Tara?” She cleared her throat and tried again after receiving no answer. “Tara, sweetie?”
Willow looked around the room blearily. She noted the bright green numbers of the clock on the nightstand announcing it was a little past midnight. They had gone to sleep about an hour earlier after researching almost all day. Her survey of the room stopped when she found Tara’s form silhouetted against the window, her body outlined in the moon’s pale light. Willow’s mouth hung open slightly as she took in the sight before her. Tara was wearing a cream colored silk nightgown that looked almost translucent in the light; her blonde hair held a preternatural glow. She rose from the bed and walked over to Tara as if in a trance. Willow came within inches of Tara, her hand outstretched in an attempt to touch the beauty before her. She froze as she realized Tara was crying.
“Tara?” Willow asked again, unsure of what to do.
“I couldn’t sleep.”
Willow was almost startled when she heard Tara’s voice. She blinked slowly. “Are you alright?” Willow asked softly.
Tara shook her head slightly. “No, I’m not. I don’t know what to do.” She sighed and turned towards Willow. Without thinking, she leaned forwards and pressed her lips against Willow’s. Tara pulled away after a few moments and stared deeply into Willow’s eyes. The room was dark, but the moonlight shining through the window lit up the red-head’s eyes perfectly. “It doesn’t make sense. But all I can think is that I should tell you, whether or not you feel the same way.”
“What are you-” Tara once again pressed against Willow, their mouths moving against each other. She deepened the kiss, gently pushing her tongue inside of Willow’s inviting mouth. The kiss ended and they parted slightly, but before Willow was able to say anything, Tara spoke.
“I love you.”
Her eyes grew wide as she realized the words that had tumbled from her mouth. Yes, she had been thinking about telling her, but to actually say it was a different matter entirely. Willow’s mouth hung open, her eyes even wider than Tara’s. For several excruciating moments, neither woman spoke. The silence was both deafening and too quiet. Very softly, almost too softly, she heard Willow speak.
“You love me? I mean, you love me. No, I mean, you love me?” She blinked, as if trying to figure out what was going on. “You can’t. I mean, you could, but you can’t. Because if you did, that would just be…” She stopped again.
Tara didn’t breathe, couldn’t breathe. What would it be? Would it be horrible? A nightmare? Did she think it wasn’t the truth? “Willow?” She only had the breath to utter her name before succumbing to silence once again.
Willow gazed at Tara’s face, drinking in every curve, every facet. She saw the hurt floating in Tara’s eyes, and could almost hear the blonde’s thoughts, wondering if everything was about to come crashing down. And without even thinking, she said the first thing that came to mind. “It would just be… perfect.” She smiled, her lips curling until a full blown grin covered her face. “I don’t know how this happened, and it doesn’t matter.” She leaned forward and captured Tara’s mouth in a passionate embrace before pulling back. “I love you,” she whispered.
Tara smiled just as widely and returned the kiss. She moved against Willow’s lips and felt Willow mirror her movements. Tara pushed Willow backwards, stopping when she felt the other woman’s movements impeded by the bed. She pushed her back softly and smiled when Willow fell onto the mattress. With an immense amount of courage, Tara spoke. “Willow, I love you. Make love to me?” she whispered. As soon as she asked the question a blush ran across her cheeks, her previous bravery forgotten instantly.
Willow looked up at Tara slack-jawed. She gazed into the blonde’s eyes and smiled brightly. Sitting up, she inched her hands towards Tara’s nightgown, never taking her eyes off Tara’s. “I love you Tara. And I could think of nothing more perfect than making love to you.” Without another word, her hands closed the distance and she ran her fingers along Tara’s nightshirt. She removed one hand and placed it on Tara’s cheek, gently pulling her down. Their lips connected slowly and sweetly, neither woman wanting to rush.
Tara removed her lips from Willow’s mouth and trailed kisses across her jaw. She pulled her earlobe into her mouth as she felt Willow’s hand leave her cheek and make a slow trek down her body. She felt Willow brush her fingertips along the side of her breast and gasped at the contact. The fingers were removed just as quickly as Willow continued her path, finally resting her hand on Tara’s hip. She bit down softly on the flesh in her mouth and felt Willow’s grip tighten on her waist.
Willow moved her hands along Tara’s stomach and then began to move lower. She felt Tara’s thighs beneath her palms and then stopped when she reached the end of Tara’s nightgown. She grasped the ends of the nightshirt in both hands and began to pull upwards; making sure that she could feel Tara’s skin the entire way. As she reached the underside of Tara’s breasts she looked up into the blonde’s eyes. “Are you sure?” she asked softly.
“Always,” Tara whispered huskily. She looked at Willow with a gaze so full of love and desire that Willow had to stop herself from ripping the nightshirt off. Instead, she inched the shirt up the rest of the way and gasped as Tara’s breasts were exposed to her for the first time that she could remember. She gently pulled the nightshirt the rest of the way off and dropped it to the floor. Willow moved one hand to Tara’s back as she moved the other to one of her breasts. She laid her palm on Tara’s flesh and smiled at the gasp she provoked.
Tara’s knees were becoming weak as she felt Willow’s touch upon her skin. She gasped again when Willow moved her fingertips across her breast. Realizing that if she didn’t lie down soon she would fall, Tara gently removed Willow’s hands and moved past her to lie down on the bed. Willow looked towards Tara and smiled before joining her. They gazed at each other, lying side by side, suddenly very nervous despite the heated touches they had shared just moments before. Somehow, lying down on the bed had cemented what was about to happen.
Tara looked into Willow’s eyes, and saw the same anxiety she was feeling reflected back at her. She moved her hand to Willow’s hip and pulled closer to her, until there was barely a wall of air between them. She tilted her head and their lips connected, the kiss almost immediately deepening. Tara moved her hand to the bottom of Willow’s shirt and tugged upwards. She felt Willow smile into their kiss and then sighed slightly as their lips separated. The sigh was cut off as she realized Willow was just removing the shirt. They reconnected as the garment was lost and Tara smiled at Willow’s lack of bra. Their bodies pushed closer until flesh met flesh. Tara moaned into Willow’s mouth at the contact, and moved her hand up Willow’s now naked skin. She moved upwards and stopped at Willow’s breasts, rubbing her fingers across each nipple. She rolled each nub in her fingers, the actions eliciting a low moan from Willow. Her other hand flew to the back of Willow’s head, her fingers threading through the auburn hair of her lover.
Without warning, Willow rolled Tara onto her back and moved a leg in between the blonde’s. She heard Tara groan at the contact of her leg pressing into the blonde’s already hot center. She moved against Tara while kissing her passionately, their tongues wrestling as their bodies danced. Willow reached under Tara and unclasped her bra. She pulled the straps down and off her shoulders, removing the bra from the fleshy globes. Moving one hand to Tara’s chest, she grasped at Tara’s waist while her fingertips gently squeezed one of Tara’s nipples.
Tara had almost lost all capacity for rational thought. She squirmed beneath Willow, pushing her hips up to meet each of Willow’s movements. She desperately pushed against Willow’s thigh, trying to relieve the ache in her center, her clit throbbing more and more with each push. Finally, she could take no more. She twisted out from under Willow and moved her hands immediately to the red-head’s underwear. Willow gasped when she felt Tara pull off her panties and throw them across the room. The gasp became a moan when Tara laid her hand across Willow’s hot flesh, Tara’s palm immediately becoming coated in Willow’s arousal.
Tara ran her fingertips along the wet lips of Willow’s center. She teased the red-head’s opening, gently pushing the tip of one finger in before pulling it out almost immediately. She could hear Willow’s heavy pants, and could feel her hips in their almost frantic movement. Willow pushed up desperately as she tried to take Tara in. Her pants turned to frustrated groans and moans, and then the moans turned into a silent scream. Tara pushed two fingers into Willow and groaned at the feeling of being inside her. The feeling was so intense, her senses overloaded with the sensation of filling Willow. She continued to thrust, slowly at first before picking up speed. She could feel Willow meeting each movement with an upward thrust of her hips.
Willow moved her hands to Tara’s back and moved downwards, her fingers catching in Tara’s panties. She divested Tara of the garment and moaned as she laid her own hand over Tara’s flesh. They continued to kiss passionately as their breasts rubbed together, their nipples hard and rubbing against each other as they moaned into each other’s mouths. “Oh goddess, Willow.” Tara almost growled the words, her arousal dripping from her center and onto Willow’s hand. She moaned loudly as she felt Willow mirror her own movements and push a finger into her, quickly followed by another.
Their passions rose quickly, until both women were panting heavily, desperate for the release that was so close. Willow continued to plunge into Tara as she felt Tara increase her speed. At the same time, Willow and Tara felt their climaxes rocket through their bodies, each woman feeding off the other’s passion. Fingers stilled and breathing slowed as each woman came down from her peak.
Willow lied down on her back and felt Tara lay an arm across her stomach. “Goddess. That was-”
“Amazing,” Tara finished for her. She breathed deeply and sighed, perfectly content. “I love you.”
“I so love you,” Willow replied. She heard Tara giggle softly and in moments both women were asleep, wrapped up in each other’s arms.
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~Sara
by The Rose24 » Thu Mar 15, 2007 10:24 pm 
TR I love it !!!!! 
!!!
I'll catch up tomorrow, sweetie, but in the mean time, ROCK ON! 
Seriously, I can't make whole sentences about that part. I'm lucky if I can think, do I have next English or psyghology. Or maybe some more fic goodness 
me want more more 
Clifhanger much!! o0o0o i cant wait to find out how they know eachother cause in the season he meets Willow after Tara leaves so 
!! but i love it!!! and Anya oh at first i thought i would be Dawn but i loved the fact it was Anya walking in on them! hehehe 
Curse words for Rack huh? Well, you might want to find some more, because his part's not over yet