I decided to post the next scenes in Alienation together, mainly because they belong together and Kath did such a great job at editing them quickly and effciently, I wanted to encourage her by posting just as quickly
*blows a kiss to my beloved*
Enjoy - the show continues....
Tara’s hand shook slightly as she took a sip from her glass of iced water. She looked up at Dawn to find brown eyes looking at her. Their gathering in the kitchen was awkward as she knew that Dawn was dealing with the aftermath of this much better than she was.
The teenager had quietly taken everything in her stride as Willow had been calmed down and given one of the sedatives from the supply in the kitchen that seemed to never run out. Just the sight of the small brown pill made the blonde’s insides ache more, added to that her having to coax her girlfriend into taking it and she felt completely horrified. Xander had helpfully been there to carry her up to bed to rest, agreeing to sit with her for a short while so that Tara could recompose herself. The toll that the daily episodes were causing was obvious on Tara’s face.
“Are you ok?” Tara asked Dawn softly.
“Oh yeah, I’m okay.” Dawn nodded. “Are you okay?”
“I…” Tara put the glass down and watched her own hand shake. “No.” She looked for a moment at the glass as the water within still rocked slightly and then turned to look at Dawn.
“I know this might sound so horrible of me but you get used to them after awhile.” Dawn’s voice was ashamed of the admission.
“I will never get used to that.” Tara shook her head, her voice was barely a whisper.
“Sorry.” Dawn hung her head.
“No Dawn, no, that wasn’t a statement against you.” Tara reached out and stroked her hand up and down Dawn’s arm. “I know that you have done everything you could and that it must have been so hard, you had to find a way to get yourselves and her through the nightmare.”
“But we’re not through yet are we?” Dawn questioned trying to be brave and not give into feelings of impending doom.
“We’re not.” Tara admitted her voice even more pained than before.
“I want to help. I’ll do whatever it takes.” Dawn vowed softly a thread of mature knowing in her voice.
“I know but...” Tara stopped and looked again into brown eyes. “Can you watch her for me?” She said suddenly and the teenager nodded her question unspoken in the air. “I have to do something.” She explained. “I have to find a way, something.”
******
‘Oh Tara, Tara what are you doing?’ Tara thought to herself as she pushed herself gently on the swing that she and Dawn had recently rediscovered. The sun had dimmed slightly and a slight chill had entered the afternoon air. It all seemed fitting after their morning of sunbathing ending in such a mess of confusion and disappointment.
The blonde looked up and watched as a large car drove slowly down the main road. As it disappeared she thought briefly of the conversation she had had with Buffy when she had recently returned.
“I’m not going to run out on her Buffy I promise.” She reiterated what she had said to the Slayer then. “But I can’t go on like this.” She added looked back down at the floor shaking her head sadly. “It’s tearing my heart apart.” She paused letting the emotion inside her build up slowly to the breaking point it had been threatening to hit for so long.
“No one has deserved any of this.” A tear dripped from her cheek onto the sand below. With a sudden flick of her head Tara looked up into the sky.
“DAMN YOU WARREN!” She shouted the words at the top of her lungs causing a small bird that was perched in the bush nearby to fly away startled into the air. “I don’t even know you and I hate you.” She felt her shoulders drop and begin to shake slightly as she cried more. “I wouldn’t be able to pick you out from a class photograph and yet I wish… I wish you’d…”
“Hold that wish.” Anya’s form melted into existence suddenly and her hand shot out to cover Tara’s mouth. “You want to really think about this before you say anything.” Tara’s blue eyes grew wide as she stared at the suddenly materialised demon. “Sorry I know, Anyanka face but you started with the screaming and the vengeance and well here I am.” She smiled through her demon appearance.
“Vengeance?” Tara blinked almost stupidly.
“I told D’Hoffrin the moment you got anywhere close to qualifying for assistance I was to be called first.” Anya nodded to the question. “You were just about to wish horrible things on Warren weren’t you?”
“No, I was just going to say I wish he’d never...” Tara shook her head and began to explain.
“Hey I told you already to watch that.” Anya put her hand out again to stop Tara from finishing. “Wishing is very serious business missy and usually well I don’t much care what the outcome is other than some cheating man getting his just desserts but in this circumstance my motivations are different. In a situation like yours a lot of little things are linked together and messing with one thing can have huge ramifications for other things.”
“You really are a vengeance demon?” Tara asked, not that she’d doubted it, well yes she had, more because she didn’t really believe any such thing existed.
“I am and officially just so you know you and Willow are owed huge payment in the vengeance department.” Anya withdrew her hand and moved over to the other swing.
“Are we? But with what Willow did...” Tara frowned she watched Anya sit down.
“Willow enacted her own vengeance.” Anya turned in the small seat towards the blonde. “I would have gladly given her any wish just as I will for you but I don’t want you wishing anything that you’ll regret. Let’s say like wishing that Warren had never shot you, because that could lead to heaps of trouble. You see if you didn’t get shot then Willow wouldn’t have gone all black magic evil and Buffy would be dead instead as Willow wouldn’t have had the power to save her.”
“Buffy would have died if Willow hadn’t done what she did?” Tara checked what the vengeance demon told her.
“It’s one of the possibilities yes.” Anya nodded. “It was like when Cordelia wished that Buffy had never come to Sunnydale, seems harmless enough but without Buffy then Willow and Xander had become vampires. See the problems?”
“Yes.” Tara admitted completely understanding.
“Now see you could say I’ll go back further and wish that Glory never did the mind suck thing on you.” Anya continued. “But see then the alternative is that Willow never would have weakened her when she put you back together, so Glory would have kicked Buffy’s ass and we’d be sitting in a pile of molten Sunnydale. Again much with the problems.”
“No, but wait.” Tara did her best to think clearly. “Those wishes were all wishing things on other people.” Anya nodded seeing that the blonde was catching on. “Can someone wish something on themselves?”
“Mmmm tricky.” Anya admitted thoughtfully. “It has to be a wish that satisfies their vengeance you see, I’m not a wish genie. There are rules that have to be followed.”
“What kind of rules?” Tara pushed for details as her brain began whirling.
“Mostly that what you wish for has to be directly involved in satisfying your vengeance, taking out your pain on the thing that is causing it.” Anya sighed. “There’s like a 4000 page manual with all the finer points but that’s the basic.”
“But what if the thing that directly caused it is already dealt with, can there another focus?” Tara quizzed.
“Do you mean that since Warren’s already dead you want to enact vengeance on something else?” Anya questioned now a bit puzzled. “Oh so you know the magic guy Rack who got Willow all hooked is dead too so you can’t pick him.” She added thinking what angle Tara was using.
“I was thinking more of Willow.” Tara looked over to Anya.
“You want to wish vengeance on Willow?” The demon’s words were slow and stunned.
“Not on my Willow no.” Tara tried to explain more but was cut off.
“Oh I get it, you want to enact vengeance on Dark Evil Willow.” Anya smiled and nodded.
“Could it work?” Tara nodded and asked the tentative question.
“This is going to be tricky.” Anya contemplated. “She was extremely powerful Tara, you know that right? I mean if you go head to head with her I’m not sure you’d win, no offence.”
“I’m not planning on meeting her at all.” Tara admitted knowing that even if a show down with her Willow were necessary she wouldn’t be able to contain the dark powers.
“Then I’m confused.” Anya admitted. “What do you want to do?”
“I want to make things right.” Tara replied simply.
“But how do you want to do that?” Anya pushed her for more.
“I want to get into Willow’s head, put right what the darkness made wrong.” The Wiccan explained her primary goal.
“Oh you want vengeance on the magic.” The demon bit her lip in deep thought. “That I can do.” She smiled brightly. “I mean I can’t guarantee what will happen when you’re in there but I can get you there.”
“Really?” Tara didn’t dare believe anything until she had the demon’s word.
“Sure, you want vengeance on the magic. The only way for you to get that is for you to be in Willow’s head right?” Anya summed up. “That’s the only place it is anymore.”
“Though Anya…” Tara hesitated but the demon stopped and waited for her to continue. “This wish, your power, its not magic is it? It’s something else entirely, yes?” She pushed.
“Demon.” Anya nodded. “Well demon magic per say but that’s not normal magic. It’s demon specific.” She tried to explain. “See things come under four categories: magic, demon, natural and accident. My powers are demon.”
“One other thing.” Tara pushed off her swing. “People aren’t going to like this.”
“Doesn’t matter, it’s your wish.” Anya stood up with her.
“I meant more we need to be somewhere that people can’t interfere.” Tara began making plans and figuring out contingencies in her head.
“We could do it at the Magic box.” Anya offered the use of her business. “Well as long as you promise that my shop won’t get destroyed this time.”
“It shouldn’t.” Tara tried to give an assured smile.
“Shouldn’t?” Anya’s eyes narrowed more than a bit worried.
“Won’t.” Tara reissued the promise.
“Better.” Anya nodded. “When do you want to make your wish?”
“As soon as I can.” The blonde conceded. If she was going to do this she wanted to get the wish made and finished as soon as possible.
“You need to get Willow to the shop then you can wish.” Anya made out the simple plan. “I’m taking it you don’t want to tell the others?”
“Believe me, after the morning we’ve had they’re not going to want to hear about this.” Tara assured her as they began walking back to the house.
******
Madalene walked through the front hall admiring the tall cathedral ceilings of the small but beautiful house that the agent was showing them. She had to admit that it was a lovely place and probably the perfect size for one. There was a small family room but a large home office that she imagined would properly suit the division of importance in Giles’ life.
“Do you think we’d comfortably fit everyone in here for the meetings?” Giles asked as they strolled back into the small family room.
“I think that it would be to your advantage to make sure it wasn’t too comfortable or you might never get a moment to yourself.” Madalene smiled at him. “Though I think the price is a bit high.” She commented giving a sideways glance to the agent.
“Really?” Giles seemed surprised. “How much do you think I could knock him down?”
“Well considering all of the obvious flaws at least ten thousand.” She appraised confidently.
“Obvious flaws?” Giles looked around again having not noticed anything.
“Well...” Madalene winked at the Watcher. “I mean I may be wrong but the stain on the basement floor suggests that flooding might be a problem in the spring and the chimney will need official inspection.”
“I think you may have been a housing inspector rather than a lawyer.” The Watcher smiled.
“I think I’m just attentive.” Madalene laughed at his remark.
“We’ve managed to avoid the subject so far Madalene, but how was Buffy really when she left?” Giles dropped his voice, the agent seemed to understand they wanted some time and slipped out into the study.
“Very upset.” The spellcaster admitted.
“How upset, its just Buffy sometimes has this habit of doing irrational things when she’s upset.” He explained his position and worry.
“As all of us were she’s shocked that Tara would just so aggressively dismiss our idea. Well I think we managed to come with something to help her focus.” Madalene smiled softly.
“The patrol?” Giles enquired crossing to the window once more checking the view it offered.
“No, she and I are going to do the spell.” Madalene made the admission in a hushed voice.
“Oh.” Giles leaned on the window mantle not sure what his reaction should be.
“It’s going to take some training for us to be in synch and for her to put up with the pain from the telepathy but she’s more than strong enough.” Madalene explained the obstacles they faced.
“I could look for ways to help her with the pain.” Giles turned slowly his eyes slightly shadowed as he joined the conspiracy.
“What we will need mostly is assistance in balancing the energies, with having to carry Buffy magically it will be more difficult for me to balance as well.”
Madalene admitted her own failings.
“Of course.” Giles nodded. “You do realise that Tara will not be happy about this, given her objections this morning.” He pointed out softly.
“Buffy and I have agreed that perhaps Tara’s current state is clouding her judgement slightly. We both know she is only trying to protect Willow but we would never do this if we thought it would hurt her.” She tried to reassure him. “If any of us think we are incapable or not ready, I for one will quickly pull back.”
“All of which we discussed when we found the spell.” Giles reminded the spellcaster. “But that doesn’t tell me how we are going to get her to agree with us doing it.”
“We didn’t particularly account for trying to change her mind Mr. Giles.” The spellcaster frowned slightly. “We only want to do what is right and necessary to save Willow.”
“I see.” Giles paused taking a moment to think. “But how were you thinking of getting to Willow without Tara?” He illustrated his point.
“That will be something we need to figure out.” She shrugged. “I have been trying to focus on ways to get Buffy prepared.”
“Of course that will take some time, perhaps over time such an opportunity will open itself to us.” He aimed for the positive. “Perhaps even Tara will change her mind.”
“Time is something we do seem to have.” The spellcaster nodded. “But something we don’t want to waste.”
“We would need to re read the spell, ensure that it would indeed be possible for Buffy to participate.” He began to analyse things.
“I think we have a lot of research ahead of us but I do believe it is possible.” Madalene agreed easily, she was glad to see the Watcher taking a proactive role in this.
“Now what was that about the basement?” Giles smiled looking at Madalene for her input.
******
“Willow sweetie.” Tara sat on the edge of their bed and reached out to gently stroke the redhead’s arm that was resting on top of the sheet. Just behind at her shoulder Dawn stood in sentry.
The redhead seemed to struggle a bit against the sedative they’d been forced to give her but didn’t full reach consciousness.
“Come on baby I know you can fight it.” She rubbed a little harder.
“Tara?” Willow slurred a bit as green eyes struggled partly open.
“Hey sweetie.” Tara leaned in and kissed Willow’s cheek softly. “Dawnie and I just wondered if you felt up to a little scenery change.”
“I like the trees, they are pretty.” Willow’s glazed eyes looked at the blonde without truly focusing. “You look like a sexy wood sprite.”
“The sedatives sometimes make her a little weird.” Dawn whispered from behind the blonde.
“Apparently.” Tara gave Dawn a smile, she was feeling the most positive then she had for a long while. “Are my ears pointy?” She asked her girlfriend wondering just how cute the image must be from the redhead’s perspective.
“You’re a fairy princess of course they are.” Willow gave a goofy smile. “Such cute ears... almost as cute as your...”
“Okay sweetie.” Tara interrupted hearing the teenager behind her giggle though she’d tried to hide it.
“Well they are.” Willow smiled even brighter.
“I know you’re very sleepy baby but do you think you’re up to maybe coming downstairs with Dawnie and I?” Tara asked the question again softly.
“Sure, I can fly.” Willow pushed to sit up.
“I know its terribly boring of me Willow but do you think you could walk, just this once.” Tara tried to persuade the redhead into at least partially helping them out.
“Oh alright.” Willow gave in and clumsily swung around trying to get closer to the edge of the bed.. “But you know if the frogs come I’m taking off right away, the frog prince is icky.”
“Well of course he is, he’s a boy and a frog.” Tara reassured her as she guided the redhead up to a sitting position.
“And boys are smelly, especially boy frogs.” Dawn added moving to one side of Willow to help guide her. Tara gave her a thankful smile as they braced and eased Willow up to stand.
“Hey where we taking Willow?” Xander appeared in the doorway. He was more than surprised to see Dawn and Tara on either side of his best friend who he had expected to be asleep on the bed.
“Xander.” Tara’s blue eyes widened she had thought the young man was asleep or doing something in the basement that would have kept him out of their way.
“That’s me.” He grinned knowing something was up now for sure.
“We’re taking her out.” Tara glanced at Dawn.
“Xander I didn’t know you wore tights.” Willow giggled as she looked at him her hallucination expanding to include his arrival. “Who let Xander be a fairy?”
“Yeah, we are but it’s okay.” Dawn nodded.
“Mmmm guys if you haven’t noticed Willow isn’t on the planet with us. This doesn’t strike me as a smart time to take her out for a walk.” He looked at Tara seriously.
“Okay.” Tara stopped and sighed slightly. She looked up into Xander’s dark eyes deciding to just tell him the truth. “We’re taking her to the Magic Box.”
“For what?” He eyed them suspiciously.
“To make a wish.” Tara admitted.
“Anya’s going to help Tara fix Willow.” Dawn explained trying to make him see there was nothing to worry about.
“No way!” Xander shook his head. “Last time Anya wished anything I turned into a vampire minion.”
“I’m not wishing anything on anyone else.” Tara assured him shaking her head slightly.
“Yeah but wishes don’t work that way, I mean you wish one thing and before you know it we’re riding people like ponies and Buffy is a waitress in Denver.” The carpenter whined in objection.
“I’m wishing something on myself.” Tara pointed out. “The only two people that can be affected are Willow and I.”
“No see that’s where it can all go wrong, we lose you and Wills.” Xander worried more.
“What’s the delay?” Suddenly Anya appeared in the bedroom.
“The delay is that I can’t believe you’re doing this. How can you risk hurting them?” Xander hissed at Anya.
“I’m not hurting anyone.” The demon retaliated. “That’s your speciality. Mine is making them better.”
“Better? How is letting Tara make some cockamamie wish better?” Xander looked at his ex truly unable to believe that she was doing this.
“Tara is going to wish for a fixed period of time to enter Willow’s head space and then sort out what has gone wrong. When the time has expired she will be returned to her own body, there is no question of it going wrong.” Anya pointed out the facts to him.
“So what does this do to Willow?” He looked over at the slightly disoriented redhead.
“At worst, nothing.” Tara replied. “At best helps her find her way home.”
“What about Buffy?” Xander questioned feeling himself start to be cornered by their happy logic.
“What about Buffy?” Anya mimicked and then tutted and sighed heavily.
“The Slayer, taker carer of Willow.” He turned to her again. “I don’t think she’s going to be happy about this plan.”
“And I didn’t think she’d let you run out and leave me on my wedding day but that didn’t stop it happening now did it.” The demon snarled. “Either help or get out of the way Xander.” She added dismissing him. “Run off and find your precious Buffy and ask for her permission to breathe if you must but don’t stand in the way here.” Tara glanced at the vengeance demon a little horrified by her attack on him.
“I don’t like this.” He contradicted but stepped back. “But you’re going to need a drive.” He glared at his ex.
“You don’t have to help us Xander.” Tara said softly. “I understand, really I do.”
“No, if you really think it’s going to help Willow.” Xander shook his head. “Then how can I say no?”
“I wouldn’t be doing it if I thought it could in any way hurt her.” Tara pointed out as she let him take her place to help carry the redhead to the car.
by WiccansIllusion » Wed Aug 07, 2002 12:49 am 
WOLFLORD 
... and oh yes definately much need for the talking as no one is working on proper info and is mostly going on emotion
mmmm well at least with Xander in the backyard with Willow he can scream to get help right? 
... so sweet of you, and you know if you don't try to write your own fic you can never find out that you are secretly hiding reams of talent 